Austin, Haymitch, Cinna and I sit on the train together (Portia, Austin's stylist, couldn't make it) and listen to Effie rant on about all the benefits the train offered.

"Fabulous food, fabulous wine, I told them, nothing but the best for my two Victors. You know, it all needs to be-"

"Fabulous?" Haymitch asks sarcastically, swigging some wine before talking.

"Exactly," Effie says, taking a sip of tea with her pinky in the air before putting the cup and saucer down. "Now, the schedule's a bit of a bare, twelve days, twelve Districts, but it's mostly parties, celebrations and adoring fans to meet you at every step of the way and then we wrap it up in the Capitol.

"All you need to do is give a few speeches, wave to the crowd and enjoy your time in the spotlight. You've earned it."

I turn round, fire in my eyes. "What did you say?"

"Willow-" Austin says in a low voice.

"I'm not speaking to anyone else, least of all you," I retort.

Effie sighs. "I said enjoy it, Willow, you've earned it."

"By killing innocent people and getting congratulated for it," I snap, standing up and walking out of the carriage.

"Young lady..." I hear Effie start to scold me before the door clicks shut.

On my way to wherever I'm going, I see a half open door with people inside it, scanning maps of Panem to navigate where we're going. When one of them sees me, he clicks the door shut. I roll my eyes as continue to the back of the train.

I sit there for five minutes, looking at the wilderness around me and hoping that I'll be able to get through the next two weeks. At some point, I get the mockingjay pin out of my pocket and spin it in my fingers, when suddenly I hear the door open.

"I'm really not in the mood for a lecture, I'll apologise to Effie later," I say. I expect to see my mentor when I look up, but when I do, I see my fellow tribute.

Austin.

I clear my throat and look down. "I thought you were Haymitch."

"You don't have to apologise to anybody," he says, sitting down next to me. "Least of all me."

"How'd you figure that out?" I ask ironically.

"For once in your life, Willow, you could listen to me," Austin says, rendering me silent before he goes on. "I don't want you to be unhappy, but I don't want to continue on like this, either."

"Well, sorry, but that's what's going to happen," I snap.

"Willow, you could at least try to be friends with me, and if not friends, then-"

"Allies?" I raise my eyebrows. "Yeah, I've been there. Not going to work."

"Okay, fine, I want us to be friends," says Austin.

"I'm not good at friends, as you damn well know," I say.

"Yes, I do," said Austin. "But the way the whole friend thing works, Willow, is getting to know the person, so the fact that you've never had friends is partly your fault. Take you, for example, I don't know anything about you except that you're stubborn, feisty and good with axes."

"That about sums me up," I nod, not interested in whatever this is.

"No there's more than that, you just don't wanna tell me," Austin continues.

"You're right, I don't," I see no reason not to be honest.

"Okay, so to find out stuff, you have to ask the person questions," Austin says. "Like... what's your favourite colour?"

"Oh, now you've gone too far," I snap.

He chuckles but I just roll my eyes before he asks again. "No seriously, though, what is it?"

There's a slight pause before I try to cooperate.

"Blue," I say. "What's yours?"

"Orange."

"Orange, like Effie's hair?" I ask, raising my eyebrows. It was true, for our escort had come wearing a bright orange wig that morning.

"No, more like a sunset orange," Austin paints the picture in my head. He can do it just as easily with words, you see, as he can with paints and brushes. But the fact that I'm getting pulled in annoys me, because I don't want to.

Suddenly, the train enters a tunnel that closes off when we're past it. The lights flicker on and off, and suddenly, I see the inexplicable sign of the mockingjay painted in red on the inside of the tunnel.

Just a blink of the lights, and it's gone.

"Did you see that?" I ask Austin. He doesn't answer.

He does, however, let out a "woah" when he sees Eleven.

There's barbed wire electrocuted fences and peacekeepers everywhere, the people must be terrified, and us... this is nothing like District Twelve.

We get off the train at a station with the walls lined with peacekeepers. "My my, this is not very festive!" Effie shouts indignantly.

We get taken to the justice building in a truck and whilst we do, Effie gives us our prep. "The mayor will make a few remarks, you'll give your speeches, oh, and of course, it's customary to give a brief eulogy to the District's fallen tributes. For Eleven that's... Thresh and Rue."

For me, they're both debts I'll never be able to repay.

"Here are the speeches," Effie hands us each a little card. We take them as Austin looks to me.

"I can do the talking if you want," he says to me.

"You always do," I say cuttingly.

However, I can't ignore that I'm happy he offered. It pains me to say, but he knows how much this is tearing me up inside. Especially since it was my fault Rue died and Thresh let me go, only to get killed by Cato again.

We go inside the Justice Building as we hear the mayor begin, I don't really pay attention until he's introducing us.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the Victors of the seventy fourth Hunger Games, Willow Hawthorne, and Austin Thatcher!"

"Smile, smile, smile, smile, smile, stand up straight, you're on camera," Effie says as she pushes us out the door. It bangs shut behind us as we walk up to where there are two microphones.

Be. In. Love.

On two giant screens at the back, are the pictures of Thresh and Rue, and in front of them stand their families. I see that Rue had a big one, with at least five brothers and sisters. But I can't look at her picture because guilt is squirming on my insides.

"Thank you," Austin begins. "We are honoured to be here today, and to be with the families of your fallen tributes."

There's a pause and I worry that he has forgotten what he's supposed to say, but then he gets back on the rails. "Though they fought, and lived with honour and dignity, until the end, both Thresh and Rue, were so young.

"But our lives aren't just measured in years, they're measured in the lives of people we touch around us. For myself, for Willow, we know that without Rue, and without Thresh, we wouldn't be standing here today. So in recognition of that, knowing that it in no way can make up for your loss, we would like to donate one month of our winnings to the families of the tributes, every year for the rest of our lives."

This is when I know he's not reading the cards anymore. That he's speaking entirely from heart.

"Thank you," Austin finishes. We begin to walk away from the microphones, but then I notice one of Rue's sisters staring at me with narrow eyes. Is it because I was the reason Rue died?

No. No, it's because I still haven't thanked her.

I walk back towards the microphone and Austin (despite looking at me weirdly) follows me without complaint. I speak into the microphone gently.

"I just wanted to say that I didn't know Thresh, I only spoke to him once. He could've killed me but instead he showed me mercy. That's a debt I'll never be able to repay."

I turn to the other screen. "I did know Rue. She wasn't just my ally she was my friend. And I see her in the flowers that grow in the meadow by my house, I hear her in a mockingjay song, and I see her in my friend, Prim. She was too young, too gentle. And I couldn't save her," I'm crying now. "I'm sorry."

I suddenly see a man in the crowd, that puts his three fingers to his mouth and then in the air. From there, he whistles my tune. The signal Rue and I made in the arena.

From there, everyone puts their hands up, but I have no idea of the damage I've done. Peacekeepers draw their weapons and run into the crowd, taking the man. I run forward but two grab me by the arms, forcing me back. "No! No! Leave him alone! Leave him alone! Please leave him alone!"

I hear the gun shot just as the door bangs closed behind me.