DEAR JACK,
I'm on my knees begging for forgiveness.
There's nothing left inside of me,
Nothing that gives me the strength to breath
And to keep fighting when all hope is lost.

❂

AFTER SOME TIME SPENT IN THE BUNKER, MANY HAD STARTED TO BECOME RATHER CLOSE. The new people had started to see Sam as a leader when he settled them into their new home and sent them out on hunts. They were adjusting to the new world and have begun to feel like it was their home.

While hard at work with the new people, Sam had kept a schedule. One that left him alone with Rose and injecting her with his purified blood. Things had seemed to be going well for the time being. She had remained calm and secure with taking the blood. This time had been harder to fight the evil inside, but there seemed to be a progress in Rose. It, of course, what Sam had thought.

Rose had been able to keep Sam satisfied for the time being. She had taken the blood when asked and followed his simple rules when he wasn't looking. But with a house full of strangers and Sam distracted and occupied, she was able to get around a few of his rules when his back was turned.

She had found herself spending time around the bunker as she felt more comfortable with the people around her. Time with Jack was well spent whenever he was not handling cases with Sam, Dean and Cas. She wished she could have gone, but knew now that she was not ready.

Instead while they were away, she had made a new friend. Her name was Maggie and she was a quiet but a great friend to Rose. With Maggie only adjusting to how this world worked, she had spent more time in the bunker, which meant more time with Rose. It was a friendship Rose had never really had a chance at having. Maggie was so close given she lived in the bunker and with the two not going on hunts, they had plenty of free time to hang out and stay out of danger.

However, Maggie was desperate for a friend and would do anything to make sure Rose wouldn't leave her. She had lost too many friends back in her world that she wanted this world to treat her differently. Except Rose's world had been turned around and injecting human blood had been an addicting drug just as it had been for Crowley. The only difference was Rose didn't ever need to kill in order to get some blood, she ad Kevin before and now she had Maggie.

Maggie knew it was wrong but Rose had been convincing that she had needed help. So when Sam's back was turned and Rose had an itch to feel something, Maggie would pull up her sleeve and flash Rose a convincing enough smile.

Today, Rose had sat at one of the tables in the library with her feet propped up and leaned back in her chair with a book in hand. It wasn't long before Sam, Dean, Jack and Cas had came in and made a beeline towards her. Slowly shutting her book, she looked up at them as she awaited their questions.

"Jack says you're friends with Maggie," Dean stated as he made his way around her.

Rose's eyes had shifted between the four as a fear had started to creep up behind her. Had they discovered what her and Maggie had been doing all this time when they weren't looking? She wasn't entirely sure how they would find out, so Rose had nodded. "Yeah, we're friends."

Sam had made his way over, taking a seat close to her. "So, then you know she went out last night." He watched as Rose's eyes shifted across the room. It was clear it was a secret between the two, but he needed the truth right away. "She didn't come home."

His words had caused Rose's eyes to lock on him. After their talk, he knew how much losing another person would mean to her. Just as she had feared, another person she cared for had left her and there was no getting her back. "She's dead then, isn't she?" Their silence had caused her to sigh as she pulled her feet off the table.

"We need to know where Maggie went, who she was talking to," Sam said gently. However, Dean was going to cut right to the chase as he had already had his suspicions, "Tell us where that bitch— excuse me... Witch was— your mom."

Rose's eyes had shifted over to Dean's as she crossed her arms. "I don't know where Constance was last night. I was in my room with Jack, and after he left, she came to say good night and that she... she met someone."

"Like a date?"

"I guess, I don't really know. All I know is he's from our world and the standard tall, dark, and handsome," Rose scoffed, but she wasn't all that interest in any one that could like Constance. She just saw bad taste and didn't question it further. "He's a deputy too, I guess. I don't know, it seemed like she was trying to make him not sound like a creep."

"Right, well, he's got bad taste in women," Dean mumbled.

Sam shook his head as he had tried to get back on track. "And what about Maggie?"

Rose was quiet for a moment because it had been a secret between her and Maggie. She genuinely enjoyed being Maggie's friend and didn't always like using her for blood. They did develop a bond and it had secrets— one for each of them. That didn't seem to matter any more given Maggie was no longer alive to ever hold it against her. Sighing, Rose shook her head. "There was this boy."

Jack looked up to her in concern. "What boy?"

"Nate. He works at that store out on Route 281. She liked him and wanted to go meet up with him. Nates a good person though. He wouldn't do this to her."

"So you know Nate?" Castiel asked curiously. "Have you spoken with him since coming back home?"

"Sure. I usually stop there for snacks and stuff, you know? And it's been a while since then. Maggie and I wanted to watch a movie and needed good snacks— snacks for her. I wanted to show her what I liked if she was going to be staying with us. I introduced her to Nate. You know, she had this whole idea of her and Nate going out and then..." her eyes nervously shifted over to Dean before falling into her lap. "She wanted double dates with Jack and I."

Turning over to Jack, Dean looked to him. "You ever meet Nate?" Jack had shook his head in response and Dean had given a stern nod. "Good. All right, well, let's go talk to this boy."

Standing up, Rose was prepared to head out but Dean held a hand out in her direction. "No, you stay behind. I know you cared about her, but you're too close to this."

"But, Dean."

Cutting her off, Dean shook his head. "You want something to do? Find out where the hell Constance was last night. See if Deputy Dumbass is a real person or not. I mean, who would you trust more, this kid, Nate, or her?"

"Nate," she said quietly.

"Good," he stated as he clapped his hands together. Turning around, he had gave a nod towards Jack. "All right, let's head out then."

In the blink of an eye, Jack had vanished on the spot without any warning. Looking around, Dean had hoped he had managed to just wander off but there had been no such luck. Jack was headed to go see Nate and get some answers while the three men had scrambled to catch up.

❂

ROSE HAD SEARCHED FOR CONSTANCE AND GET SOME ANSWERS. Yet when she had searched the bunker for Constance, she had came up short. She had pushed open her bedroom door and it had only been empty, not even Constance had been waiting for her. Everything had been oddly suspicious with Constance lost in the wind. Never had she been willing to give Rose this much space to the point that Rose could no longer turn around to find her lingering not too far behind.

As Rose had shut her bedroom door behind her, Mary had rushed down the hall with her arms extended out. "There you are!"

Rose narrowed her eyes at her, "What's going on? Have you seen Constance?"

"Have you seen Jack?" Mary questioned back. Grabbing onto Rose's hand she pulled her along with her as she began to explain her own predicament she had found herself in. "Jack showed up not too long ago. I tried calling you."

Using her free hand, Rose had felt in her pocket but her phone hadn't been there. "I must've left my phone somewhere. What happened? I thought Sam and Dean were getting him."

"And they did. He ran off again and he found him." Stopping her as they stepped in front of the big table, Mary had felt herself frowning. "Rose, Lucifer and Michael found their way into this world. He found Lucifer and they showed up here."

"Are they still here?" Before waiting for an answer, Rose had made a push to go look herself, but Mary grabbed her by both arms. "They left again. Jack told him to bring back Maggie. She's alive, Rose."

Pushing Mary's arms off her, Rose had headed straight to the library where Maggie's body was being kept. Only this time, when she had walked in, Maggie wasn't under a blanket, lifeless. She had been sitting in a chair and shot up out of it the moment she had seen Rose.

Making her way over, Rose had looked her over curiously. "What happened?"

Holding out her hands, Maggie had looked them over before her eyes traveled up to Rose's. "Lucifer brought me back. B-but Rose..."

"You need to hear this," Mary said quietly as she made her way in.

"You know who killed you," Rose whispered. "Who did it?"

"I-I barely remember," Maggie began nervously. Sinking down into her seat again, Maggie had still felt shaken up. She remembered what it had been like after she died, but she was lost and scared on what had happened after. "I saw something. Before I died. I-I was leaving to go see Nate. I didn't see his face, but I remember his eyes." Pausing, she had looked to Mary and Rose. "They were red."

Turning back to Mary, Rose could feel the anger rising but before she could turn away, Maggie had grabbed her hand. "That's not all," she said quietly. "Constance was there. She was with whoever killed me. Rose, I am so sorry."

Spending time together, Maggie had understood the struggle Rose had with the relationship she had with her mother. The trust that seemed to always build and crumble within seconds. Maggie always knew better than to believe Constance had changed, but she was always guilty if she even considered talking with Rose about it. Rose was delicate and with an addiction coming to light, Maggie didn't want to add on to it all.

Pulling her hand away, Rose had held her hand out to Mary. "Give me your phone, Mary."

Pulling it out, Mary was hesitant before she placed it in Rose's palm. "Rose, we should wait for Sam and Dean. They're already on their way. We need to prepare for Michael."

Holding up the phone to her ear, Rose had felt fidgety as she played with her shirt. "I'm calling Jack."

"He won't answer me," Mary fought back. Standing up, Maggie had went to open her mouth, but Rose had left the room as she spoke to Jack's voicemail. Mouth hung open, Maggie had been unsure if now was the time to hold in a secret or not. She had struggled just the same as Rose had just to keep their friendship alive and able to survive such a world.

But now seemed better than anytime to tell someone when Maggie could no longer help herself. "I'm so sorry," she began in a shaky breath. "I know I should've told someone but I promised." Swallowing hard, Maggie had pushed aside her guilt to protect her closest friend. "Rose hasn't been listening to Sam about taking the blood. She's been getting it from me and-and she's not adjusting well like she says she is. I-I'm afraid she'll do something now with Lucifer, Constance and Michael..."

Taking a step back, Mary had prepared to follow after Rose but the sound of the bunker closing had caused a distraction. Her mind couldn't help but slip back into the ongoing chaos of Michael and Lucifer's arrival to this world. Heading out of the library, she felt relieved to see that Sam and Dean had been home to try and make sense of this all.

While Mary had tried to play catch up with her boys, Rose had begged Jack to answer his phone as she made her way down the halls. She had passed her room, and several more until she had stood in front of Sam's room. "I need things to go back to how they were and that means I need you. Please call me. Come home," she concluded. Pulling the phone away from her ear, she shoved Mary's phone into her pocket as she stared at the door.

It had become an unscratchable itch that was becoming more determined to push forward. She had only begun to feel sick as her body aches for just a little more. The purified blood had only felt like a drug that was not easy to let go. And as things continued to fall apart, it had seemed like the only thing that had made sense. Maybe it could be the one thing to make her feel human enough inside to process her emotions. But it would come with a price— something she was willing to give into just for that feeling. Reaching out, she had turned the knob and allowed herself into his room.

Only she wasn't alone.

Sitting on Sam's bed with her back to the door had been Constance. Rose was quiet as she watched her carefully. She wondered if now would Constance hurt her after what she had done to Maggie. She had already hurt her before and it was a given she would be very willing to do it once more.

Without turning around, Constance had kept her head down as she looked to the thing she held in her hand. "I've just been sitting here waiting for you," she said quietly. "I knew you'd be here." A small laugh had escaped her lips as she felt that for once, she was winning. "You're so predictable. You're like your father. You're exactly like him. A monster. A self-loathing, attention-seeking, coward. And you need your fix to make yourself feel good about yourself for once."

"You don't get to talk about him," Rose said sternly as she kept her back against the door. "He never hurt me. He may have been a lot of things, but he wasn't a coward and he protected me. You never did. I was always better off not knowing you. Without him, I wouldn't know where I'd be."

"This worlds version of me was smart to run." Looking over her shoulder, Constance had sent Rose a smile before she had turned back to her lap. "Everyone leaves you, sweetheart. It's why you're here, isn't it? In Sam's room, searching for a fix while everyone else just forgets that they made you this way."

"They didn't do it. You did. You're the one that left me like this when I needed you."

Standing up, Constance had held onto the syringe full of Sam's blood. "You use this because the only human emotion you'll ever feel is numb. And you'll shoot yourself up until you stop feeling all together because that demon part of you, it's the only part of you that is keeping you alive. Sam's blood will kill you and you can't wait to die."

Rose had taken a step over towards Sam's desk, but when Constance had seen her making a move, she had reached into her jacket and pulled out an angel blade. "Don't bother. You couldn't kill me if you didn't wanted to. I made you this way to get to him."

"To Lucifer," Rose said calmly. "He doesn't care about you. He doesn't care about anyone. All he wants is Jack and he wants him for his power."

"And what did you think I wanted you for?" Laughing loudly, Constance held the blade up as she took a step toward her. "You're completely worthless to me— even as this demon. You're a disappointment. Not only do you spend your time hunting, but you... what's inside you— that demon..." Growing angry, Constance had dropped the syringe down onto the ground before roughly stomping on it. Glass had crunched beneath her feet while the blood had pooled around. "Nothing can save you."

Rose's eyes had left the blade as she watched the blood on the floor. She had slowly closed her eyes as she felt sick to her stomach knowing the one thing that could make her feel any different than she did now was destroyed. Seeing this, Constance had faked a laugh, "You really are pathetic," she spat. "Only a monster would treat human blood as a drug."

Biting down on her lip, Rose had fought back a frown as she slowly looked up to Constance. Her eyes had glossed over from tears that stung her eyes. "At least I don't follow Lucifer around like a pathetic groupie. He hates you and he'll never let you live. You're standing in the way of him and Jack just like me. You're not so different from me after all. We're both just too inconvenient."

"He's taking me to the stars," Constance whispered. "He'll destroy this world and he's taking me with him. Would Jack take you to the stars, Rose?"

"He wouldn't need to. Jack would never hurt me and he would never hurt the people I love. And I am glad you are not one of the people I love. You killed Maggie."

"Maggie got in the way," Constance corrected. Stepping closer, she had slowly raised the blade up Rose's throat as she used her free hand to brush her hair to the side. "She screamed when she died, you know that? I can only imagine how loud those Winchesters will scream. Before Lucifer and I leave, I'll make sure you see them go first."

Constance's head cocked to the side as she saw a tear finally slip down Rose's cheek, only causing her to dig the blade in deeper. When blood was drawn, she had taken a single finger and wiped it up before sucking it off. "Demon blood," she whispered. "Nothing human about it."

"I don't need your approval," Rose struggled to whisper. "Because I have tried everything and everyone here, they're proud of me. Crowley and Rowena, they're proud. You don't deserve anything from me."

Hesitating for a moment, Constance had almost pulled the blade away. But giving Rose any power only took away hers. Leaning into the blade, Constance held her face closer to Rose's until her breath had hit her face with every word. "I want you to look at me," she whispered.

Forcing herself to look at Constance, Rose could feel the warmth of her tears streak across her face. However, when she had smiled, Constance could feel the power slipping away. "Smile all you want, Rose. I still win. And I'll tell those Winchesters how you cried for them because you believed they loved you."

"They do," she whispered back with a smile.

A deep frown had set on Constance's face as her anger had taken over. Pulling the blade off Rose's throat, she had moved quickly as she stabbed the blade into Rose's shoulder. Yelling out in pain, Rose had gathered the strength to knock back Constance on to the ground. Eyes turning black, she had clenched her teeth together as she wrapped her hand around the handle covered blood. Fighting back the urge to yell out in pain, Rose had slowly pulled the blade out from her shoulder.

Using her free hand, she had held the wound in her shoulder as she took a step towards Constance. She had sat up in her spot, a sudden realization settling in that she had made a dangerous mistake. Seeing that a black-eyed Rose that held her fresh wound and a bloody angel blade in hand, Constance had pushed herself back. "You won't kill me. I'm your mother."

Standing over her, Rose had a tighter grip on the blade as she narrowed her eyes at her. "Are you afraid, Constance? You made me this way," she taunted. "That blood was supposed to make me more human and you taking it away doesn't help you. There is still a demon part in me and it's pissed."

Constance had tried to get up onto her feet to get away, but Rose held her hand out and it had pinned her back onto the floor. "You knew when you killed me that if you didn't make me hate myself that I would've seen you for what you really are. And I'm not afraid of you anymore."

Pinned to the floor by Rose's power, Constance had finally felt herself break. Tears forming, she had used her last moments alive to beg for forgiveness. Something that she never deserved and would never get back. Because she had chosen to corrupt Rose, it had all came back to bite her. And because of it, no matter how much purified blood, or how much Rose was desperate to be human, there was no going back after this.