┌─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┐

chapter twelve
i miss you.

└─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┘
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┌─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┐

The brown-haired girl's paint-splattered canvas almost slipping out from where it was tucked under her arm with her small backpack slung over her shoulder, her brows stitched together as her eyes swept over her phone screen.

missed calls from sean (2)

sean
please pick up, angel.
please give me a chance
to explain.

sean
you know i won't
give up on you.

The brunette's hazel eyes wild as they made their way down her phone screen, she let the smallest whimper slip from her lips, feeling her heart throb in her ribs at the sight of his name.

It had been about a week since it happened.

Since then, Sean had sent her several texts, trying to tell her his side of the story, trying to tell her the truth about that day-that one, fateful day-and yet no matter how hard he tried, how many texts he'd sent, she'd leave him on read.

Every. Single. Time.

Just like he did to her.

Kaycee's eyes couldn't help but grow wide as her bottom lip twitched ever-so-slightly when she saw he had started typing as soon as she had read his texts, almost as if he had been waiting for her to read everything he'd sent her.

Before she could even close out of the app, the boy had already sent her another text.

sean
please, kayc. please
talk to me. please give
me another chance.

Kaycee stared at her screen for a while, before shaking her head, a small sigh slipping from her soft lips as her eyes fell shut. No, don't give in.

Shutting her phone off and sticking it back into the pocket of her light-washed jeans, she hiked her backpack higher up her shoulder as she hugged her piece close to her chest, the painting pressed up to the light fabric of her sweatshirt.

Kaycee slightly looked up, meeting the gaze of her on-campus best friend, Taylor, before the blonde-haired girl quickly turned her head and looked back at her stained white canvas sneakers.

Though confused at first, she shrugged her shoulders, shifting her attention to the her shoes, silently deciding that the contrast of her ombré-colored sneakers against the white, paint-stained floors was more interesting.

Kaycee and Taylor walked side-by-side through the student-filled halls of The Cooper Union in silence, not a single word spoken between the two of them.

Though the two spent most of their time together, the brunette didn't tell her about what had happened with the black-haired boy.

In fact, she didn't tell anyone.

She had even bailed out of all of her shifts at the café for the past week so she wouldn't have to see any of the girls.

Kaycee didn't tell Chloe. Not Bailey. Not Charlize. Not even Tahani.

She told absolutely no one-and by this time, they had already found out what happened through their other light brown-haired best friend. They tried to reach out to her, but she didn't really want to talk to any of them about it.

She kept it all to herself.

The small girl might not have known it, but her dirty blonde-haired best friend had caught onto the fact that there was something wrong-something very wrong.

And she wasn't the only one.

Taylor Hatala was a first-hand witness to the newly-discovered disease that had spread throughout the paint-stained halls of The Cooper Union.

Throughout the week, the blonde watched up-close and in-person as the private, non-profit university was pretty much flipped on its head, the prestigious institution crumbling to pieces as it practically went through its very own version of the plague.

And that so-called plague was none other than an unhappy Kaycee Rice.

Though the small girl was just a first-year student who wasn't even close to finishing a single semester (her first semester having only started a mere three weeks earlier), she seemed to have already made her mark.

Although it was unspoken, it wasn't a secret that she had some sort of effect on the students of the university.

There was something about seeing the happy-go-lucky brunette, usually smiling from ear-to-ear at anyone who saw her, so down and out-of-character that seemed to drain the university's paint-splattered floors of their color.

Kaycee could turn anyone's frown upside down-and by anyone, they meant anyone-all the way from the most wrinkle-faced of professors to the most stressed of straight-A students.

Sometimes, all it took was a small girl and her smile that shone like the sun to brighten up your day.

But, for a week now, that sun-like smile wasn't there. Instead, it was replaced by nothing more than a lopsided, tight-lipped smile that only made your chest tighten.

It felt like there were no rainbows after the rain that poured over the rooftops; like the universe had grown smaller; like the world had been tilted out of balance.

And everyone felt it.

Heaving a sigh as one of her hands held her sketchpad close to her chest and the other tightly held onto a strap of her powder blue backpack, Taylor treaded through the halls of the university as if she was walking on her toes, her eyes on the brown-haired girl that was trailing behind her.

It had been like this for a week now-the brunette finding something on her phone, a faint breath falling from her lips, before she frustratedly stuffed it back into her pocket.

Taylor just grew more worried as the days went by, and she knew she wasn't the only one.

A feeling of unease rising in the blonde's stomach as she noticed the students that turned their heads to look at the two of them, she tightened her hold on her sketchpad before throwing a glance at the girl behind her, her eyes still on the ground.

It wasn't a secret why people were looking at them-not only was it because of the fact that the small girl wasn't smiling for the seventh day this week, but because of the painting she had brought along with her.

You see, about a week earlier, their professor, Professor Tim Milgram (who preferred to be called TimTim as to not sound as old as he really was), had given them complete freedom for their very first project, telling them to go with the flow and to feel free to show everyone what they were feeling.

Show everyone what they were feeling-and Kaycee did just that.

So, while her blonde-haired best friend had, quite conservatively, painted very lightly-colored watercolor flowers in the comfort of her multimedia sketchbook, she had completely went all-out.

Biting down on her lip, Taylor felt the tiniest bit uncomfortable as Kaycee had no shame in showing the slightly larger piece she had made, painted with very strong, bold colors in sharp, thought-out lines, the colors mingling together.

Besides the fact that she wasn't exactly showing the brightest of smiles, it was pretty obvious Kaycee had very, very strong feelings about something-or rather, someone.

Sucking on her lip, the blonde sighed before looking back at the seemingly never-ending hallway in front of her before she could walk straight into someone, or less preferably, a brick wall.

Taylor finally felt like she could breathe when they found the end of the hallway, the doors swinging open as they stepped off campus, the blonde swallowing as much sunshine as she could before the skies turned a shade of gray.

She knew all too well that it was bound to rain on a day like this.

Tapping her supple fingers along the edge of her sketchpad as she held it against her chest, she turned on her heel.

"My next lecture's still in two hours," Taylor started, "Do you, like, wanna do something while I still have the time?"

Suddenly caught off-guard, Kaycee silently swallowed something down, guilt trying to seep into her throat as she sucked on her lower lip.

I have work today.

Seeing the slightest bit of hope in the dirty blonde-haired girl's bluish-grayish eyes almost made her heart drop, the guilt weighing down on her shoulders as she knew she couldn't spend the rest of the day with her.

Taylor had been the only person the brunette had spoken to since it happened, unable to bring herself to talk it out with her best friends, and although the blonde had no idea what her on-campus best friend's problem really was, she still provided her with a shoulder to lean on.

Kaycee silently cursed her co-worker, Josh Beauchamp, and his sappy, oh-so-romantic ways or whatever it was that got him to think that it was a great idea to pull his girlfriend out into the rain during a date, getting him sick the next day and eventually getting her to take over his shift.

Since she had been giving out half-assed excuses for why she hadn't been attending her shifts at the café for the past week, her taking up his shift, even for a single day, was the only way they were going to let her keep her job.

She owed this.

Dammit Josh, she cringed, brows crinkling together. You absolute dumbass.

She wanted nothing more than to curse him for getting her stuck on his shift while he was at home, probably getting sick, needy cuddles from his girlfriend.

Maybe he wasn't such a dumbass, after all.

"I'm sorry, Taylor," the words tumbled out of the brown-haired girl's mouth, leaving its searing touch on her tongue as the last letter left her lips, "I can't."

A sigh fell from her lips as she set her piece on the ground against her legs, stretching out the scrunchie around her fingers as she pulled her straightened brown hair back into a ponytail.

"I'm filling in for someone at my job," Kaycee confessed, smoothing out the small hairs that stuck out of her ponytail.

As she made a half-assed attempt to clean up her long ponytail, she felt her phone buzzing in her pocket, pulling it out almost immediately, something she did out of habit.

incoming call from sean

Kaycee's brown eyes grew into saucers as she shakily pressed decline, dropping the call as she shoved her phone back into her pocket, praying to the man upstairs that he wouldn't call her again after that.

And thankfully, he didn't.

This didn't go unnoticed by Taylor, however, as she simply stood there and watched as it happened, a brow tilted upwards in the slightest.

The dirty blonde-haired girl moved back and forth on her toes, tightly holding onto her sketchpad.

"Uh, it's fine, Kaycee," Taylor smiled, slightly awkward, "Just take care of yourself, alright? If you ever need me, just shoot me a text, a call, or whatever you're comfortable with."

Kaycee's heart warmed at her words. "I'll keep that in mind," she giggled light-heartedly, leaning down and picking her piece up from the ground.

The brown-haired girl still needed to drop her things off, maybe actually try and tie her straightened hair up, and change into some other clothes.

"I'll be at Wendy's if you ever need me," Taylor threw her head back in laughter, giving her friend a small wave.

The two bid their goodbyes, the blonde going off to find somewhere close by to grab a bite to eat before she was stuck in some boring two hour-long lecture while the brunette set foot in the other direction to her apartment building.

Not really in the mood to receive strange looks from small children and their slightly put-off parents as she sat in the subway with her painting on her lap, Kaycee decided against taking the subway and just made the short walk to her apartment building.

Although she did get a few looks from random people in the streets, she thought it was still better to have strangers looking at her for a split second than some middle-aged woman with her face scrunched up and eyes squinted staring at her as she sat in the subway.

Finally reaching The Ventura, Kaycee made her way to her floor, dragging her feet across the floor as she fell into her studio-sized apartment.

Throwing her canvas and small backpack onto the nearest flat surface (which was the granite counter of the kitchen-like area of her studio apartment), she flopped onto the couch, one side of her body on the cushions while the other half hung on the edge, her left leg spread across the cold floor.

Lulu peeped her head out from under the sofa, brushing her fluffy ears against the girl's jean-clothed leg as she threw her sneakers off of her feet, leaving her in her socks.

Kaycee lazily lifted her eyes open, her eyes landing on her bed on the other side of the small apartment, neatly-done as if she had left it untouched, his scent still lingering on her sheets.

When she closed for eyes for a second, it was almost as if she was sent back to when she'd still smile whenever she'd see his sleeping figure in her sheets, his chest rising and falling with ever faint breath-his cheek pressed up against one of her pillows, his spiky black hair sticking out in different directions, and his lips slightly parted as he snored softly.

Almost.

The memory disappeared just as quickly as it came-within the blink of an eye.

A groan erupting from her throat, Kaycee peeled her body off of the couch, padding over to her closet to grab some new clothes she could change into after cleaning herself up.

As her eyes sifted through her wardrobe, a particular piece of clothing caught her eye, neatly-folded and tucked into the corner of her closet.

Sean's shirt.

Kaycee stilled. She stared at his shirt as she thought back to when it hung on her shoulders, hugging her small frame as he strung his arms around her, her head tucked under his chin and against his chest.

God, she hated the fact that she missed him.

She scolded herself. Think with your brain and not that stupid thing inside your chest.

Endlessly frustrated with herself and her feelings, the brunette fisted one of her black sweatshirts and pulled it out from under his shirt, falling out of her closet and landing on the floor.

Her hand tight around her dark-colored top, Kaycee tore her eyes away from the piece of clothing on her carpeted floor, the mere sight of it stinging her eyes as salty tears threatened to spill out.

She slammed her closet shut before stomping off to the bathroom, taking a shower as quickly as she could.

Knowing that her small, studio-sized apartment had remnants of him and the memories they shared scattered in every corner, Kaycee hurriedly cleaned herself up and headed out.

The back of her sweatshirt drenched, the tips of her straightened hair were still dripping wet as she tramped out of her apartment building and tumbled into the streets, trudging to the café to work a shift that wasn't even supposed to be hers.

Things were just absolutely great.

Kaycee may have had her head hung low and her eyes on the ground, but her head was up in the clouds.

She didn't even notice the short-haired girl that was walking towards her.

"Kaycee?"

Suddenly feeling as if every inch of her skin had been covered with goosebumps as they crept up the back of her neck, the small hairs on her arms and legs standing up, her head snapping up at the sound of one of her best friends' voices.

Bailey.

Kaycee's eyes shot wide open and saw Bailey staring at her, brushing her long lashes against her cheek as she blinked once, before blinking again, not believing her eyes.

The petite brunette could've sworn that the short-haired girl was about to smile.

Truthfully, Kaycee couldn't really tell because as soon as it had gotten through her thick skull that one of the people she had been all-out ignoring for the whole week was, in fact, standing right in front of her in the flesh, she swung herself around and started sprinting down the street in the other direction.

"Hey, wait!" Bailey yelled. "Come back!"

In true action film fashion, the brown-haired girl maneuvered her way around poor, random passerby's that were just going about their day-to-day lives as they made their way down the street.

She tried her absolute best to lose the short-haired girl through the sea of people, the two swerving around strangers in the streets.

"Why have you been ignoring our calls?!" Shouting out loud, Bailey aimlessly ran down the sidewalk as she caught a glimpse of a blur that looked like her best friend's brown hair. "We need to talk!"

Kaycee always being the faster of the two ever since track and field back in their high school years, it didn't take long before she lost her short-haired best friend and camouflaged herself with the rest of the crowd.

Her chest rising and falling with the sound of her blood still roaring in her ears and the adrenaline still running through her veins, she pressed her back against the wall of a slightly worn-down, black building, her sweatshirt helping her blend in.

The petite brunette felt her phone buzz in her pocket, pulling it out to look at the notifications that kept on pouring in.

bailey
i know that was u kayc

bailey
we need to talk

bailey
read my texts already

With her chest heaving, she ran her hands through the roots of her damp hair and down her face, feeling way more déjà vu than she had initially prepared herself for when she woke up that morning.

Everything about it-the breathing, the sprinting, the hiding-everything felt all-too familiar to her.

Except this time, she didn't have Sean by her side.

Stop thinking about him.

Kaycee shoved her phone back into the pocket of her light-washed jeans as she started to set foot, the short walk to the coffee shop now twice as long since she just had to run all the way to the end of the street.

You'll be fine, Kaycee, she told herself, trying to ease her nerves. Things will get better. They always do.

The brown-haired girl tried to keep on the low as she kept her eyes open for any of her best friends.

She now started to have second thoughts about living in the same area as all of her friends-she was bound to run into one of them at some point, even if she was actively avoiding them.

Taking a lot longer than she had imagined, Kaycee started jumping up and down in her head when she caught sight of the café with a full ten minutes to spare before the shift she had to fill-in for started-all without seeing anyone she knew.

Finally, she thought. I can keep my job.

But the little party in her head was cut all-too short as soon as she spotted an unmistakable tuft of stark hair through the thin sheet of glass that made up the coffee shop's floor-to-ceiling windows.

"Ah, shit," Kaycee hissed. "You've got to be kidding me."

That soft fluffy hair, lightly-freckled face, and dark brown eyes-without a doubt-belonged to no one other than Sean Charles Lew himself.

Abort mission. Abort mission.

Out of all the days he had to have coffee at the café, it just had to be the day she had to fill in for someone.

The day when her job at the coffee shop she had been working at for as long as she could remember hung in the balance.

Fuck.

Kaycee tip-toed on over to hide behind the tree that stood in front of the coffee shop. She looked over her shoulder, seeing the black-haired boy's eyes stuck to his phone screen as his fingers swiftly slid across the smooth surface.

"It could be someone else," Kaycee said, speaking to herself, shrugging her shoulders.

That's when she felt her phone shift in her pocket, pulling it out as soon as she felt it, something she did out of habit.

sean
i miss you, kayc.

sean
so much.

Kaycee swallowed the lump in her throat. Okay, definitely him.

For some reason, at that moment, she wanted nothing more than to just slide into the seat in front of him, squeeze his hand, and tell him in the softest, most sincere voice that she missed him, too.

But she didn't.

If she was being honest, something inside her itched for her to answer his texts, her thumb twitching ever-so-slightly.

But, again, she didn't.

Instead, she closed out of his contact and scrolled down her contact list, calling someone else up.

"Pick up, pick up," Kaycee whispered to herself, wishing the slightly tan-skinned boy would answer her call. "Please."

Tre de Rego.

Watching him from over her shoulder, Tre gave an elderly woman a porcelain mug of freshly-prepared coffee before pulling his phone out of the pocket of his pants, picking up her call.

"Hey, Rice!" he excitedly greeted. "God, it feels like I haven't heard your voice in forever."

Kaycee smiled into her phone. "Hi, Tre."

"So, you still filling in for Josh's shift?" Tre asked, his eyes lighting up.

He stuck his phone in between his ear and his shoulder, wiping down the counter with a worn-out, coffee-stained towel as he cleaned a few splatters of water and some scattered crumbs here and there.

"Uh, a-about that," Kaycee nervously scratched the back of her neck before faking a cough, making sure he had heard it. "I actually can't make it today-I got sick, too. I'm sorry."

"Really?"

Her breath hitched in her throat when his eyes widened with surprise, hoping with whatever was left of her soul that he wouldn't get suspicious.

"Y-Yeah," the lie tumbled out of her mouth before she could even think it through, every letter tasting like poison to the tip of her tongue. "Sorry to call last-minute."

"It's fine, Rice," Tre smiled. "Are you going to be able to make it this Thursday?"

Thursday was in two days.

The small girl's brows stitched together. "Um, can I ask what's happening in two days?"

Kaycee watched as the slightly tan-skinned boy's eyes widened in surprise, almost as if he was shocked that she didn't know. "You don't know?"

She simply stuttered out a small "n-no" before he said into the phone, "Hasn't your boyfriend told you already? He says he's borrowing the front of the café for some sort of performance. He says it's for school or something."

Kaycee almost scoffed at the word. Boyfriend.

A performance? At a café of all places?

"O-Oh, right," she lied, "I must've forgot."

"Yeah," Tre hummed, "We don't really know how many new people will come in and how packed it'll get, so we need to have as much help as we can get our hands on."

"I-I'll see what I can do."

As the call slowly grew silent, Kaycee started to play with the sleeve of her sweatshirt, sweat trickling down the side of her forehead as she swallowed down the acid that was rising in her throat.

"Tre?" she started, hoping her nerves wouldn't be heard through her voice, nearly trembling.

"Yeah?"

"Can you say that I came in for work today?" Kaycee winced as soon as the words left her mouth. "I-It's just that, t-they said I'll lose my job if I didn't take over Josh's shift, and I-"

"Hey, hey," Tre soothingly said into his phone, "I've got you, okay? You can count on me."

A smile couldn't help but tug at her lips, and for the first time in a while, it seemed to stretch past her eyes, shining like the sun.

"Thank you so much, Tre," Kaycee thanked him, the sincerity dripping in her voice as she took down a note in her head that she owed him. "You're the best."

"It's no problem, Kaycee," Tre grinned. "Don't forget to get some rest and get well soon, okay?"

"Of course," she giggled lightly.

The two told each other their goodbye's before ending the call, the small girl letting out a sigh as she pressed her back against the tree, slowly sliding down it.

Slightly tilting her head to the side, Kaycee caught sight of the black-haired boy as he sat hunched over his table, brows creased together in frustration as he tugged at his hair, a hand buried in his thick hair and the other holding a pencil he repeatedly hit against the table.

He's still working on that?

When he glanced outside and his gaze met hers, she quickly walked back into the tree and sucked down on her lip, swearing that her heart could pretty much jump out of her chest at this point.

Shit.

Before she could go into cardiac arrest, she google-searched the nearest Wendy's and made a run for it.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Quietly standing in front of the fast food place as she patiently waited for her Uber to pick her up, Taylor sipped on her soda, sealing the paper cup with her lips as she swept her eyes over the small flyer she held in her hand.

The blonde was simply enjoying her drink as she stood along the streets, letting the cold city air kiss up her skin, the smallest of smiles gracing her soft pink lips.

That is, until she heard someone shouting her name as loud as their vocal chords would let them without tearing from all the way around the street.

"Taylor! Taylor!"

Taylor's eyes widened as she whirled herself around, only to find none other than Kaycee Rice herself whipping around the street and running towards her.

The brown-haired girl sprinted down the street and came to a screeching halt as she stood in front of the blonde, sweat trickling down the side of her head before swiping it off with her forearm.

"Kaycee, are you okay?" Taylor asked worriedly, watching the small girl as she panted heavily, slightly bent over as she placed her hands on her knees. "You look like you ran a marathon."

"I kind of did," Kaycee tried to laugh it off, trying to keep a smile on her face.

"You should've told me you were coming," the blonde said, "I wouldn't have gotten a driver already if I knew you wanted to catch up."

"Sorry," the brunette breathed out, straightening her back. "It slipped my mind."

"What happened to your shift at the coffee shop?" Taylor questioned as she threw the paper cup in her hand into the nearest trash can, the brown-haired girl trailing after her.

"Things happened, schedules changed," Kaycee said casually, shrugging her shoulders, trying not to give the blonde too many details about her not very well thought-out cover-up story.

Taylor simply nodded along, knowing better than to question the girl and her usually short, vague answers.

The two girls shared a short conversation before the blonde caught sight of her ride out of the corner of her eye, the eye-catching red vehicle sticking out like a sore thumb amidst the sea of the usual black, silver, and white cars that swarmed the streets.

"I really wish you could've told me sooner, Kaycee," Taylor sighed, seeing the car pull up at the side of the street.

"We'll see each other tomorrow," Kaycee giggled, waving goodbye to her on-campus best friend.

As she pulled the car door open, the blonde's eyes lit up as she looked back at the flyer in her hand, almost letting it slip her mind.

"Hey, if you need something to do for the rest of the day, I think this might do."

Taylor handed the brunette the poster before hopping into the car, happily waving at her through the window before driving off.

Left nothing short of completely and utterly flustered, the brown-haired girl blinked once, before blinking again. Furrowing her brows together, she looked at the flyer her friend had shoved into her hands.

Kaycee's eyes widened when she realized that what she had in her hands was a poster from the one and only internet sensation and social media star turned Juilliard scholar, Bailey May, who was going to be performing some songs that he had written himself at Central Park later that day.

Seeing as Bailey was pretty well-known, it kind of made sense that he'd go all-out for something as little as a school project.

For some reason, the details written into the flyer seemed familiar-a performance for one of the most prestigious schools in the country, showcasing a selection of originally-composed songs-but she couldn't quite pin why it seemed familiar.

Almost as if on cue, the girl's phone vibrated in her pocket and she quickly pulled it out.

sean
i know you want me to
leave you alone, and if that's
what'll make you happy,
then i'll do it.

sean
all i know is that i'll
hate myself if i didn't at
least try.

sean
if you could make it,
could you go to the café
this thursday at 3pm?

sean
i miss you.

Slowly growing still, she stared at her screen, almost like a switch had been flipped in her head.

Kaycee thought back to everything-all the secret papers he stashed into his backpack with his scribbled handwriting, all the times he simply answered her questions with the words it's a surprise, and now, him asking her to come to the café on the same day he asked to use the front of it for a performance.

Suddenly, a thought crossed her mind; a thought that almost stopped the blood roaring in her eyes, the side of her head throbbing.

Tate was a major in music.

Sean was, as far as she knew, writing a song.

And just like that, all the pieces clicked together.

└─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┘