As I rap on Haymitch's door with my freezing knuckles, I take time to look at the expensive new watch on my wrist. Good, it's just over an hour before the cameras (and Cato) get here. Exactly when my drunk of a mentor told me to come and wake him.

"Haymitch!" I yell, opening his door, because I know he will likely be passed out drunk. I walk in, yelling again. "Haymitch!"

His house is the same as mine, and I have been in it a couple times since coming back, so it is easy to navigate my way to the kitchen. There, I find my mentor, sitting slumped at the table, head in his crossed arms on it. The table is littered with bottles and half eaten food, and it doesn't smell very good. I hesitate to go near it.

"Haymitch. Wake up, it's tour day," I say to him, rolling my eyes and braving the walk round the table to stand behind him. There, I shake his shoulder, but he is properly out, and doesn't wake at this. "Haymitch."

Seeing that he isn't waking up from my shaking him, I look to alternative methods. I find a half empty tankard of liquor sitting on the table, and shrug.

Then, I proceed to throw it on him.

"AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!"

With a loud roar and a lot of flailing, Haymitch awakes, instantly getting up out of his chair and wielding his knife, which I forgot he always sleeps with. When he realises it's just me, he relaxes, but is still just as angry.

"What are you doing?" He demands, pointing the tip of the knife at me.

"Cameras are gonna be here in an hour," I tell him. "Along with Cato."

Saying his name pains me, especially after my talk with Snow.

Haymitch slams his knife down, advancing towards me. But I advance right back, telling him. "If you wanted to be babied, you should've asked Andrew."

"Asked me what?"

Neither of us had heard the door open, but as we both turn we realise it must have, because Andrew Archer, my second mentor, stands before us.

"Asked you to wake me without giving me pneumonia!" Haymitch yells.

I roll my eyes as he tells me. "You are a strangely dislikable person."

"The feeling's mutual," I reply darkly.

Andrew chuckles. "Well, you've got some warming up to do before the cameras arrive, Sage."

I sigh, because I do not need to be reminded of that anymore.

"Which is, in an hour, so... take a bath, Haymitch," I reply, starting to make my way out the house.

I decide to ignore his comment. "I just did."

I have more pressing issues on my mind.

☦︎☦︎☦︎

By the time I get back to my house, more visitors have arrived. Only this time, they are more pleasant ones.

"Hello!" Effie says, all posh and formal as she swans into the house in a gold wig and a ridiculous fur coat. "Oh! There she is, my greatest triumph!"

"Our little superstar!" Flavius, one of my prep team, agrees as he and the other two, Octavia and Venia, enter. "Sweetie, we've missed you," he tells me, kissing both my cheeks.

"Oh, what a cute little house! So quaint, isn't it?" Effie swoons. "Of course, you've heard about Cinna?"

This gets my attention. "What happened to Cinna?"

"Oh, dear, he's a fashion star, you're his muse! Everyone in the Capitol is wearing him! Everyone, everyone!"

"Well, not everyone."

The sound of his voice makes my muscles relax slightly and I can't help but let out a genuine sigh as my stylist walks through the door.

"Cinna," I say, almost running at him as we embrace. I pull him tight, because he is such an amazing person, one of the very few I know.

"Sage?" A small voice makes me pull back, and I turn to see Prim standing hesitantly in the doorway.

Octavia gasps. "Sage, is this your sister?"

I nod. "The youngest."

She lets out a squeal. "Oh, sweetie...!"

As she fawns over Prim, I turn back to my stylist, who asks me. "Are you okay?"

I look at Cinna, pressing my lips together. I just have to get through the tour, I think. Just the tour. So I nod at him. "Yeah."

"Ready to work?"

He smiles. "Alright, cause we've not got a lot of time."

☦︎☦︎☦︎

The train wheels screech as the vehicle comes to a halt in front of us. I am standing between Prim and Katniss, my whole body frozen. Well, it's not frozen, because I have a very nice fur jacket and new pair of thick trousers on, and my face is buried beneath layers and layers of makeup, but I am practically paralysed in fear.

Behind us stands my mother, and beside her are Effie, Cinna, Haymitch and Andrew. Gale is not present, and after speaking with Snow, I do not want him to be.

Past my loved ones waits some of Twelve. Some people didn't want to see Cato's arrival, which I can understand, but those who did are in attendance.

And aside from all of them, about four robotic cameras lie around me, about to film my reaction to Cato's arrival, about to determine my fate. No doubt in the Capitol, Ceasar Flickerman has already began his introductions to the audience.

I brace myself as people start to exit the train, flicking my tongue along my lips to wet them for the undeniable reunion kiss that's going to take place in a matter of minutes.

First comes Cato's escort, Salcilia, a woman with waist length purple hair and dramatic makeup. His stylist, a woman with a brown bob and bright eyes called Eleanor, comes next. Then his mentor, Enobaria, appears. She is a pretty woman, with a tanned face and hazel eyes. But her teeth. She won her games by getting them chiseled into fangs, and using them to rip people's throats out. I don't want to think about what being in the arena with her would've been like.

But I don't get to, because then, he's there.

It happens quickly, but it feels anything but. Because it's been two months since I've stared at his perfectly symmetrical face. It's been two months since I've watched the way his blonde hair ruffles in the breeze. It's been two months since I've stared into those eyes.

Those eyes.

They are still as ocean blue, as piercing blue, as mesmerising blue, as they were before.

And then he smiles, and they sparkle.

He smiles at me.

Then he's running towards me, and I am him. We meet in the middle, hands flying and bodies crashing, as I throw myself into his arms, smiling as wide as I can manage.

"I've missed you so much," Cato smiles into my neck.

"I've missed you too, Cato," I tell him, and it's true, but then again it's not.

He pulls back, and then he's looking at me and his gaze is flickering down to my lips. I waste no time in connecting them, kissing him deeply. I can almost hear the "awws" from the Capitol.

As we pull apart, he smirks at me. "I've missed that, too."

"Shut up," I roll my eyes, shoving his chest slightly. Then I look up into his eyes. "Do you want to come and meet my family?"

You'll like this, Snow, I think bitterly, as I lead the blue eyed, blonde haired boy to my family, introducing him. Know how much you love my family. When you're not threatening their lives, of course.

"This is Prim," I say, smiling at my blue eyed, blonde haired sister. She smiles gently at him.

"I've heard a lot about you," Cato grins down at her.

"You too," Prim smirks at me, and I feign rolling my eyes as Cato chuckles.

"And you're Katniss, right?" He turns to my other sister, who nods.

"Hey," she says, voice low.

"Hey," Cato nods at her. "Sage talked about you a lot as well."

"Good things, I hope," Katniss deadpans, unable to stop herself.

"Mostly," Cato chuckles, unexpectedly grabbing my hand. I sigh, squeezing slightly as his warm ones fire up my freezing.

"Okay, and cut!" Says one of the people in charge of the cameras, as all the lights on each of the robots power down.

I turn to Cato, but wish I hadn't.

Because suddenly, his face turns off. His smile vanishes, his hand unlinks from mine, his whole body goes tense and worst of all, his blue eyes shut down, the sparkle no longer present in them.

"Nice acting," he mutters. "Almost thought that kiss was real."

Then he's gone, off to meet Haymitch and Andrew and possibly my mother.

And I am left standing there, my whole entire body feeling numb.

☦︎☦︎☦︎

The last time I was on a train, I was coming home.

Now, I am speeding away from it.

Only the mentors, stylists and escorts are actually on the tour, so after I have said my goodbyes to my family, I find myself sat next to Cato in two train seats, opposite Haymitch and Andrew. Enobaria is stood behind them, and Cinna and Eleanor, the stylists, are at on our left. Effie and Salcilia (who, as it turns out, are past accquaintances) are speaking to us from across the train.

"Fabulous food, fabulous wine, I told them, nothing but the best for our two victors!" Effie grins, Saliclia chuckling at her antics. "It all needs to be, uh..."

"Fabulous?" Haymitch speaks up, raising his eyebrows with a certain sarcasm as he downs a small glass of liquor.

"Exactly," Salcilia smiles over at him.

"Now, schedule's a bit of a bear, twelve days, twelve districts," shrugs Effie. "But it's mostly parties, celebrations, adoring fans to greet you at every stop of the way, and then we wrap it up in the Capitol!"

Salcilia grins the widest at this news. "All you two need to do is give a few speeches, wave to the crowds and enjoy your time in the spotlight. You've earned it."

Anger flares through me and I clench my fists.

"What the fuck did you just say?" I ask loudly, looking up at Salcilia.

"Sage," Cato murmurs from beside me, but I ignore him.

His escort raises her eyebrows at me as Effie jumps in. "She said enjoy it, Sage. You've earned it."

I chuckle sarcastically. "By killing people?"

I'm fucking done.

Effie sits back, sighing heavily. "Young lady..."

But I don't care. I have already got up and am exiting the compartment, my shoulders pushed back, my head held high. As soon as I leave their eyesight, however, all that collapses.

I walk down the train, peeking into a control room, the door of which gets shut immediately by the man in there. I roll my eyes, heading further down before ending up in the back compartment.

Its walls are windows, and inside it, I can see the train hurtling down the rails. I sit down on one of the cushy sofas inside it, watching us go. I don't feel like talking to anyone right now, and this way, I don't have to.

But of course, it's not even been five minutes before the door slides open.

Without looking up at who I know is Haymitch, I say loudly. "I'm really not in the mood for a lecture. I'll apologise to Effie later."

When there's no witty, drunken reply, I look round, and see that it's not Haymitch but Cato who is walking towards me.

"Thought you were Haymitch," I tell him sheepishly.

"You don't have to apologise to anybody," Cato mutters, sitting down opposite me. "Least of all me."

I laugh bitterly. "That's all you seemed to want to happen the last time we did this dance."

He rolls his eyes. "Yeah, but... I'm coming to live in Twelve after the tour, and... we're gonna have to get along for that. Might as well start now."

As much as I hate to admit it, he has a point.

"But you want more," I point out. "You want more than just 'getting along', Cato, and I know it."

Maybe I underestimated his boundaries, because next moment, his eyes are flared in anger, and he raises his voice at me.

"You don't know anything, Sage!" He snaps, standing up.

"I know you!" I argue, raising my own voice now as I get up, facing him.

"You really don't," he rolled his.

"Yes I do!" I yell, as angry as him as I take a step forwards. "And in the games, I really valued our alliance. Not our friendship, not our relationship, but our alliance. Cato, we were so fucking close I thought I was actually going to fall for you, I-"

I cut myself off as I admit this, trying and failing not to notice this flash of shock flitting across his face.

"Wh... what?" He asks.

"I- I didn't mean that," I instantly backtrack.

"Yes you did," but Cato has heard me, and is now pouncing on my answer. "What the hell d'you mean, you thought you were actually gonna fall?"

"I-I just meant that-" I stammer, shaking my head. "Listen, Cato, when we were in the games I was obviously pretending to be in love with you, but there was just a couple of times when I thought-"

"Thought you were actually in love with me?" Cato raises his eyebrows, rolling his eyes. "Well, that's nice to know, Sage, that that was your internal battle, when mine was something like, 'oh, I've gotta do whatever it takes to keep her alive because I am completely, undeniably in love with h'-"

"I never asked for you to think that!" I yell. "I never asked for- for any of th-"

"Yeah? Well guess what, Sage? Me neither!" Cato roars back. "No one EVER asks for this! Yet all YOU ever care about is YOURSELF!"

And to that, I have no reply.

His face is right up in mine, his eyes burning with a fire I can't quite place, his cheeks flushed, a sheen of sweat glistening on his temple.

Tears are filling my eyes before I can reply, and then I am sitting down. I sob quietly, shaking my head.

Cato just scoffs. "If you're asking me to console you, you're crazier than I thought possible."

"I'M NOT ASKING YOU TO CONSOLE ME, CATO!" I scream, tears pouring down my cheeks. "I'M ASKING YOU TO JUST FUCKING LISTEN!"

"THEN TALK TO ME, SAGE!" He roared. "FUCKING SPEAK!"

I stare at him, trying not to break down sobbing.

"I- I didn't mean that," I stammer. "All I... all I meant was that I want us to be friends, Cato-"

"Yeah? Well, so did I!" Cato snaps. "But clearly, you're more worried about yourself than anyone else at the moment, so I'm going to have to say no."

When he walks out of the compartment, I try and control myself.

Then, once he's out of sight, I break down.