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chapter twenty.
see you on the other side.
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June wanted her friends back. She at least wanted to know if they were okay. They had battled and took down an AI that had one mission; to take over the human race. And they still haven't been in contact with the ones waiting for them at Arkadia. The radio's wires were still torn even though Monty was working on them as fast as he could. She felt like she had one leg dangling over the edge of a cliff, waiting for the news that would make her let go and plummet to the ground. That news would be that June's friends failed despite taking ALIE down and they were all wiped out in Polis. She can't even have fun celebrating their own victory with Monty, Harper, Jasper, and Raven because she didn't feel safe. She couldn't let her guard down - she believes doing so would only lead to more destruction.

The drink in June's hand did nothing to bring relief to the weight on her shoulders no matter how many sips she had. She didn't want to feel a buzz in case that destruction was minutes away from happening and she wouldn't be able to defend them. Jasper, however, had already lost himself to having a few too many as he slid and danced to the blaring music while carrying a container of moonshine as he came to a stop in front of Harper. "Sorry about the... You know," he apologized, gesturing to the cut on her forehead.

Harper cocked her head with a raise of her eyebrows. "Smashing my face into a wall or pistol whipping me?" She inquired with faint sarcasm.

"Can I plead the chip?" Jasper requested with a little wince at the boldness. Harper paused but she seemed to accept his apology anyway. She raised the cup he poured with mock cheers and he followed the motion in reply before moving on. Jasper doesn't get the chance to pour a drop in Raven's cup before her hand appears from underneath the desk and slaps over the rim. She gave him a strict, scolding glare as she stood with a push on her working leg. "We saved the world. You're supposed to celebrate, I think that's a rule," he insisted. "Come on. Even Thompson took some." He held up the container again.

"I'll celebrate when we know the others are okay and when I get the mainframe back online," Raven says firmly as she eased herself in the chair next to June and went to work on the set of computers again.

The monitors started lighting up with blue codes. June took one last sip before she pulled a keyboard towards her and went to work. She didn't notice Jasper behind her, watching, with watering eyes until he whispers to the pair. "Is it weird I want to go back in?" He admitted under his breath so neither Monty or Harper could hear. June doesn't move but her heart aches at the confession that he'd rather be under ALIE's influence than be in pain - pain that she caused, pain that came with the guilt even mountains couldn't carry.

"It's not weird, Jasper," Raven tells him without taking her eyes off the screens.

Jasper pointed to the main screen. "It is weird that you can code though and you're not a coder, right? It's like ALIE upgraded your brain." He paused and June felt his gaze burning through the back of her head. "Then again, I mean, June's got this without having the chip. You two almost have the same mind."

He thinks June's smart enough to do this without a chip. It's almost a compliment but it's enough to make June's lips twitch into a vague smile. His mood was like a temperature - hot with anger, cold with calmness when it came to her presence - but it was a start. "Thanks, Jasper," she said quietly.

"Something like that," Raven agreed. She stopped tapping the keys so she could look over her shoulder at him. "You okay?"

"Are you?" Jasper retorted without answering. June considers maybe her presence affected him from replying to her question. "You've been through more than anyone."

June peeled her eyes off the screens of mixing codes to look at Raven only to see she was smiling back at her with a glimmer in her own eyes. Then she shakes her head and gave Jasper a small shrug. "There's nothing like a little pain to remind you you're alive," she declared. They share a nod before Raven rose. "You got this, June?" June joined them in giving her a nod so she could limp away to Monty, dragging her bum leg behind her.

Jasper's eyes study the monitors again. June can see his lower lip trembling through the black parts of the screens as he tries to fight back tears. "Wish I'd got an upgrade," he mumbled. More guilt washes over June. She was one of the few that caused his pain and she still wanted forgiveness in a place she didn't deserve to have it.

"Okay, everyone out!" Raven decided. She waved her hands dismissively. "Go on, take the music with you. I need quiet to fix the radio, and June has to code." June half-expected Raven to order her to leave too because she knew the mechanic didn't like distractions when she was working, but she must not have thought of June as a burn. The thought made her smile again.

"Oh, come on," Harper groaned. "Why does June get to stay? You'd think she'd be your biggest distraction," she hinted. June didn't swivel around in her chair out of fear they'd notice her cheeks warming. Her rooted love for Raven wasn't very subtle.

"Hey," Raven warned easily with a harsh point of her finger in Harper's direction. She held her hands up in surrender. "June and I can easily be left alone and still get work done. Unlike you rabbits." She gestured to Harper and Monty.

It's time for Monty's cheeks to flush. He tried to shake it off and look at Raven uncertainly. "You sure?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Go on, celebrate. Please, enjoy yourselves," Raven says although it sounds more like an order for them to have fun while they work.

Harper shrugged and gave Monty a pat on the hand to distract him from the radio. "I'm starving," she announced. "Come help me raid the kitchen." They leave together with a bright glimmer in their eyes before Jasper followed, carrying an extra skip in his step. He suddenly seems giddy, happy, even. June is too glad to see him happier to question it so she lets them exit the control room without a question.

The mechanic fiddled with the knobs of the radio for only a second before June hears a loud wince of pain. She pulls her hands away from the keyboard so she can turn around this time and see the one she loved crouching over a stool with her brace stretched in front of her, tightening her fingers above her knee. Raven's in pain again. "Raven?" June spoke up in concern and stood. "Are you - "

"I'm perfect," Raven responded through clenched teeth without letting June finish her worrisome question. She's frustrated. She's annoyed, and June will only get in her way and prevent her from her work if she dwells her anxiety about her too loudly or hovers. She has no choice but to back down as she returns to fiddling with the radio. "Bellamy, are you there? Polis, this is Arkadia. Come in, Polis," she urged before mumbling away from the speaker. "Come on, where are you?"

There's a faint static that holds the hint of a voice that grasps June's attention. "Is that them?" She asked anxiously, approaching the radio to hear closer.

Raven is eagerly turning a knob until the frequency becomes clearer. "Hello? Bellamy, come in."

"Raven," Bellamy's voice, clearer than day in June's ears, replies. "Are you okay?"

The breath Raven and June have been holding together is released all at once. "Yeah," Raven answers. "We're all in one piece." Other than Jasper's poor leg Monty had to shoot, June thinks but doesn't mention it. By the anxiety in Bellamy's voice, he has more than enough on his plate that he's about to share with them.

"Good, there's something we need you to look into," he requests.

"First tell us how our friends are," Raven orders firmly. "Did everyone make it? Clarke?"

There's a beat of silence. And then, "I'm here, thanks to you." It's Clarke and she sounds exhausted but grateful to be alive. June shuts her eyes for a second. Thank God for that. But then Clarke jumps right into it. "Raven, did ALIE ever tell you why she created the City of Light?"

"No, why?" Raven says, confused. She and June's eyes meet for a second and speak a thousand questions to one another. It seems the cycle hadn't met its end yet.

Neither of them gets the chance to answer. June hears chaos come from the other end, faint shouts of panic that has Clarke's attention. "Go, fill Raven in," she instructed Bellamy before there's a short scuffle.

"Raven?" He says before announcing. "We've got a problem."

"June's here too," Raven introduces. There's more steadiness in her voice now like she's prepared for anything Bellamy can throw their way.

She hands the radio's speaker to June who presses on the button. "Bellamy?" She says. There's a quietness in her undertone that she doesn't recognize in herself. She's afraid. But to let it show would only make her friends panic more. June keeps calm, not for herself, but for them. "There's no trouble we can't handle. We made it through this. What else is there?"

And as Bellamy tells them as much as he can with the limited information he had, she realizes that she was right not to let her guard down for a minute. Destruction, like they've never seen before, was coming, but unlike ALIE, it doesn't want survivors. It wants to swallow the planet whole and take every life with it, something they couldn't avoid by running or taking cover like they had their whole lives - radiation.

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It doesn't take long to gather Monty, Harper, and Jasper together. June doesn't even react to how flushed Monty and Harper are or how quiet Jasper seems. Her eyes have been glued on the screen since she and Raven went on their little mission sent by Clarke and they burn. The light, along with her filling emotions that are close to pouring over, has been the cause of stinging tears. No part of her wants to believe any of it is true even when the facts are staring back at her. So June doesn't speak and she's grateful Raven notices she's too overwhelmed to do so and takes the floor for her.

"... After the second Fukushima disaster, Panacea Power patented a failsafe system with multiple redundancies." Raven paused so she could demonstrate what she meant by pointing to a graphic blueprint on the screen. "By 2048, two dozen mega reactors were built to withstand any disaster, even a nuclear attack." She whirled back around to face them and await their reactions.

Monty and Jasper are listening, but Harper just looks confused. "Well, that's good, right?" She questions.

"There's always a catch," Jasper pointed out. June lets out a quiet, bitter laugh that they can't hear. Because he's right. They've always paid the price for every stupid catch and here they are, again. What's one more time?

Raven nods. "The plants were built to be self-sustaining for a hundred years," she explained shortly.

And so the tension that lingers in the air that follows is thick enough to be cut with a knife. June wished she could slice through it and all her problems would disappear. "So the warranty just ran out," Monty deadpanned. June finally looks away from the computer as he moves and follows his trail, watching as he pointed to a monitor with three levels of color - green, yellow, and red. The arrow was nearing the red. "This is us?" He guessed and pointed to the quivering arrow.

"Yes. It's been yellow since we've landed. Yellow we can handle, our bodies adapted in space, but it's rising when it should be falling," Raven explained. She paused to inhale deeply as if the possibility of crumbling was only moments away. "And when it hits red..."

"We're dead," Jasper stated bluntly. June doesn't know what she was expecting when it came to him. It was always hard to tell because he was difficult to read. As of now, he only seemed blank with a slight interest in the new information. "Uh, how long?"

"At the current rate of increase, six months," Raven estimated. "But it'll be bad way before that."

June swears she sees the corners of Jasper's mouth twitch into a smile. "Bad," she repeats more clearly. "As in, this planet will soon be unhabitable for us if we survive the changes before it ends."

A sudden glimmer appeared in Jasper's gaze. "Can we stop it?" June's eyebrows furrowed at the wistfulness in his voice.

"No."

Then he does something unexpecting. June's mouth falls into a gape as Jasper suddenly lets out a choked laugh before it becomes almost a manic fit as if unavoidable death was funny. "Oh, oh man!" He exclaimed through it with a grin of happiness like June and Raven had just presented a perfectly cut sweet, frosted cake to slice for him instead of a wave of radiation coming for them all. Jasper's series of laugh doesn't pause as he reached for the holster they all swore was empty after disarming him and retrieved a firearm. It falls to the table with a clatter.

"I'm gonna go watch the sunrise," Jasper announces joyfully as he leaves towards the exit and Harper searches her own holster with a look of surprise at the fact that it was empty. Jasper must have swiped it.

June waits for the door to the control room to shut before she clears her throat. Jasper was alone with a gun after they had a celebration. "Did he - "

"I don't know," Monty whispered. June considered that maybe he didn't want to know either. But they couldn't ignore that or how Jasper laughed until he was breathless at the inevitable death.

Monty leaves then, and soon Harper follows. June figures they want to talk to one another and has a feeling Raven wants to talk to her, alone, because she's been quiet since they gathered everyone. "You were right," Raven spoke up. "Before, I mean. When you said that there's no trouble we can't handle." She's desperate for June to believe her, she can hear it in her voice. "After everything we've made it through... Don't shut down on me now."

"I'm not shutting down," June mumbles softly. She takes a deep breath. She knows the tears are coming, could feel them brimming on her lids. "Raven, I... I don't want to die."

Death was a journey and June had seen too many of the people she cared about to take it. She tilts her head back to the ceiling to try and blink away the tears, but it isn't working. All she can do is repeat their names in her mind like a calming prayer. Allison Thompson. Hunter Thompson. Wells Jaha. Finn Collins. Maya Vie. Gina Martin. Lincoln Kom Trikru. Jacapo Sinclair... And, it doesn't work. June can feel the tears slip free and make their way down her cheeks.

"June..." Raven's word is gentle, comforting. But she's unafraid. June can tell that much. She's done nothing but go over what they're facing and soon she'll work herself to death trying to find answers. But what else was there? Hell if June knew. She eases into the touch Raven gives her, her hands on her forearms, her shoulders, her cheeks, her hair, attempting to catch June's watery eyes. "You're not going to die. After everything you've done, you've earned your place here with me."

But that wasn't it, was it? June thinks. Her forehead pressed against Raven's who settled with that touch alone. She has to think about it again. Maybe she got it all wrong and misread her own thoughts or fears. Maybe she isn't afraid of death. Maybe she's only afraid of the radiation since it's been an enemy to her people for so long.

Because June knows everyone she's ever loved and lost will be waiting for her on the other side.

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author's note:

long time no see!!!

i currently have just moved all my stuff into my apartment and i don't have wifi so i'm using my phone's data to work this out. i just missed writing so much and needed this break plus i really missed june thompson and had to update this since i haven't touched it in months!!!

i hope you're all having a wonderful june. don't forget to support the black lives matter movement in any way that you can!!!

i'll be back hopefully soon - see you on the other side. <3

- koda