─ PAIN AND TRIGGERS ─

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Alessia felt groggy as she attempted to open her eyes, her heart was pounding within her chest but it was nothing compared to the sharp pain within her skull. She tried to lift her hand to her face but she was stopped. She quickly realised that she was strapped down, her eyes shot open as the bright lights blinded her causing her eyes to water. She looked around as her sight adapted to the lighting and she knew exactly where she was.

Alessia closed her eyes for a moment to breathe, her mind flashed with memories of being taken from the party. Fear crept into her mind as Evan Anderson slowly approached her with a smirk resting on his face, Alessia screamed and pulled at the straps as he leaned down over to her face. "Welcome home Wraith, we have so much planned for you." He chuckled deeply as a tear left her eye as she realised why he bought her back.

He picked up a needle from the side table, "Let's begin then." Without being careful he injected Alessia with a liquid that burned underneath her skin, forcing her to let out a blood-curdling scream that made her more scared. Slowly, she began to hyperventilate as Evan spoke again, "Don't worry Wraith, you'll be a goddess after this..." His tone was full of pride that made her sick to the stomach. Alessia remembered the times that Evan did his experiments on the soldiers that Hydra had created, she remembered the pain that Aaron went through and she was not ready for this.

Evan called for one of the doctors to come over, he picked up a knife before turning to the doctor who definitely looked like he didn't want to be here. The doctor looked down at Alessia with pain and fear, a hint of sympathy but no fight which meant she'd probably die just as she found her soldier. "Time how long it takes for her to heal," Anderson then sliced her wrist, she screamed out. The blood seeped out of her wrist as it burned in pain, tears fell from her eyes as the doctor shakily timed it.

"S-Sir, she's losing too much blood. She'll bleed out..." Anderson let out a frustrated growl before allowing the doctor to bandage her open wound. Anderson walked to the other side of her leaning down before stroking his fingers through her thick knotted hair, "It's okay Wraith, I'm gonna make you perfect and we'll be together..." Her stomach churned at his words, she wanted nothing more than to run away and never look back at the sick man before her.

As she slowly allowed her eyelids to close, Evan injected another needle full of liquid which made her scream and convulse, causing so much burning pain for what felt like hours until black spots clouded her vision and the only thing she could muster were three quiet words, "I-I'm sorry, J-James..." and darkness consumed her, lulling her to dream of pure joy and love, something she believed she would never feel again.

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"If you could think of one thing you miss, what would it be?" I thought for a moment as James ran his fingers through my tangled hair. He was seated on the crappy prison bed with his back against the wall, I was sitting in between his legs with my back to his chest. "One thing would possibly be... My mother's roast potatoes." He chuckled at my comment as he kissed my head.

I leaned forward and looked at him, "What about you then?" He smiled before thinking deeply. "One thing I miss... protecting Stevie." I smiled as I remembered the stories he told me about the scrawny boy who never backed down from a fight. Those stories, Steve's determination, is what helps my confidence and inspires me to stand my ground.

I moved myself to sit on my knees in front of James as I ran my fingers through his hair, his eyes never leaving mine. "If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be?" James' question caught me off guard. It was a common thing for James to ask me questions like this, I found it adorable as we learned more about each other.

I moved my hand to rest it on his chest, "Right where I am now with you." I didn't need to hesitate, being right here with James was all I needed despite our demons wandering around the corridors outside the cell door. I watched as he smiled before switching our positions, I was now laying flat on my back as he towered over me.

He smirked as he leaned down, his lips teasingly brushed against mine as my eyes closed. I arched my back causing our bodies to be closer as I parted my lips, "James..." I moaned, he instantly slammed his lips to mine as he carefully rested his body against mine.

His lips found their way onto my jaw, then my neck sparking my soul to life as I tried my best to moan quietly. His cold metal hand found its way under the tank top I was wearing as James slowly moved his lips back to mine. He pulled away slowly, resting his forehead against mine, "I'd want to be in anywhere with you by my side."

I opened my eyes, staring into the vast ocean of emotions that crashed against the shores of his mind. I smiled at James as we switched places again, he was lying on his back as I laid next to him with my head on his chest. "Can you do something for me?" He spoke quietly as the corridor lights went dim meaning it was midnight, I lifted my head to look at him.

I nodded, "Can you sing for me again?" I giggled at his request before resting my head on his chest again. I thought deeply about any song lyrics that I could find when I finally thought of a song I heard on a mission I worked on.

If you're lost you can look and you will find me,
Time after time,
If you fall, I will catch you, I'll be waiting,
Time after time,
If you're lost you can look and you will find me,
Time after time,
If you fall, I will catch you, I'll be waiting,
Time after time...

I heard subtle snores as James' heartbeat slowed, I knew he was asleep. I let out a slow breath as I closed my eyes, "I will always be there even when I'm gone." I focused on this moment, locking it in my mind with every detail I could in hopes they'll never take it away. But even I know not to hold onto that hopeful dream, after all, dreams never truly come true.

Especially not for the broken toy soldiers...

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"Come on, you didn't!" I stared at James with shock as he laughed. We were both sitting on the floor of the cell across from each other, "So, even though he didn't want to go on that ride at Coney Island-" I laughed at James' expression as he tried so hard not to burst out laughing. "-you still forced him which lead to him throwing up in a trash can?" He nodded as we both began laughing till tears fell.

We managed to calm ourselves down, taking slow deep breaths as we did. "That's truly amazing," I managed to speak without laughing. "He got me back though," His face fell and I knew what he meant, he was referring to when he fell from the train. I shuffled myself over to James and placed my hand on his face, "Remember what I said."

He looked me in the eyes, his eyes softened as a small smile appeared on his face. "You've already fallen once, don't allow your mind to fall with it." He repeated the heavy words I had told him. I leaned in to give him a quick soft kiss, "Exactly!" He smiled as I sat back in front of him.

We both sat silently as I played with the hems of my sweatpants, James' eyes were on me the whole time. After a few minutes, I looked up to meet his stare. "Why are you staring at me?" He smirked, "I want to memorize every part of you, I want you to be the first and last thing I see when they wipe these memories away."

I got up from my spot and walked over to James before sitting down in his lap, resting my forehead against his. "I'm scared James, I'm always so scared." My hands began to shake, "You are my home, my person, my hope, my reason to fight." I closed my eyes as the tears began to fall, "And if I ever truly lost myself, I'll fall apart. If I lose you, I'd die."

James' arms wrapped around me tightly as my tears continued to fall, "Now you listen to me, Alessia Hart, you won't lose yourself. I've never met a person stronger than you, even when it seems they've taken everything from you, you'll always know that you have something to fight for." He leaned in, brushing his lips gently against mine.

"You are a true hero, you saved me in so many ways. We will both find our way out of this place." I smiled as we kissed, His hand rested behind my head to hold me in place as he picked up the passion. My arms were around his neck when my fingers entangled into his hair, tugging it slightly causing him to growl.

He slowly pulled away, "When we do get out of this place-" He began leaving small kisses on my forehead and cheeks before pulling away to look into my eyes, "-I'm gonna take you dancing..." I giggled at his comment, "I'd sure hope so, James Buchanan Barnes." I held onto that promise and I'll hold onto it till my last breath.

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Author Note
Most of the flashbacks throughout the story will be in First Person rather than Third Person.

-Rose <3
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