Not seeing each other everyday was bad as was. The winter rolling around, the cold seeping through the expensive victors homes, regardless of what you did to stop it. The nights were cold and lonely, no one to hold. Peeta and Zoya saw each other every now and then, usually on victors nights, and whenever it was "mandated" for her to visit Twelve or him to come see Five.

There were letters, innocent ones just to tell each other how their day went. Anything else would surely alarm the capital and have one of them killed, considering it was very likely that someone would be reading their letters before mailed. It was miserable, the boredom and loneliness of not having the only person that understood the other by their side. Zoya and Peeta both held onto the times they'd see each other, usually every four months, sometimes five.

But when the victors tour would come any day now, a capital crew being sent to Twelve for the interview of the happy couple, was seemingly impossible for Zoya not to go.

Haymitch needed her there. Katniss needed Zoya after admiring she'd been the one to do her eyebrows so nicely, saying so infront of the entire capital because she knew it would come in handy in the end. And Peeta. Peeta would need her there to help him channel his inner romantic, having to be in love with the girl across from his house, who hadn't spoken so much of a full sentence to him since the games months ago.

Zoya stared at the letter when it came.

Z,
Please come as soon as you can. Cameras are already starting to show.

-P

The initials were something they did at first, even though it was seemingly pointless at this point. Sure, Snow knew it was them, his staff on mail knew. But if anyone else got ahold of the letters, they'd have no suspicion as to who 'Z' or 'P' was, meaning Zoya was safe from the crazy fans of the star crossed lovers. Zoya knew she would need a damn good reason to go to Twelve, Katniss would surly be her alibi on the whole eyebrow thing.

She needed to bake.

She would show up with strawberry tarts, one of her favorites. She could say they were for Primerose, adding the flower onto of the basket. She burnt the letter from Peeta, as she always did, as he did as well. She'd kissed Roz's cheek in the living room, making the girl take her eyes off the pages and ask Zoya if she needed her to come with her.

Regardless of how much better Roz had been doing, going to Twelve would only be bad for her in the end.

Zoya wished her a goodbye and said she'd be back in two days time, leaving with her warmest coat, the snow falling into her freezing skin. The train ride was quick for victors, having all that money getting them where they wished to go at whatever speed they wanted. The strawberry tarts had gone cold, but that was okay, they were terrible anyways. Peeta would do much better when she arrived, even though surely complimenting the salty treats that were meant to be sweet.

A few people around Twelve smile and greeted Zoya, others turned their nose up to her and looked the other way. They were just as the other districts were, either hating or loving the victor. Five liked Zoya enough, they thought her clever act resembled their district well. But there was always the blood thirsty locals who hated that she didn't have more bloody fights like most victors did. Zoya hated that they thought that way considering the two gruesome fight she had haunted her constantly.

She sometimes could still feel the girl slashing her arm after tying her up. She'd always seen her head smashed in, under her own foot, every night in her dreams. The final boy wasn't as bad, but his lifeless body falling on-top of her after her nightlock fingers grazed his lips still came to her every now and then, reminding her that was her, she'd killed those people. Not to mention, when she won, the capitol showed Zoya all the tributes she'd murdered with her nightlock trick.

They wanted gruesome, but they had no idea what she was already having to live with daily.

As Zoya suspected, she'd run into someone from the capitol. What she didn't expect, was for it to be Snow his self. "Miss Butterfield, what a surprise to see you here in Twelve. I can't imagine why you'd be here, especially only being here three months prior."

His words were out of pure mockery, reminding her when he threaded to have her killed if she gave anyone any suspicions on a possible love affair with Peeta Mellark.

"Katniss has asked me to do her eyebrows for the big interview." Zoya spoke, frozen in the snow. She then remembered the basket on her arm. "I've made strawberry tarts for Prim, as well. Would you like one?"

She then wished she'd have poisoned these as she did in her games.

"I'm okay." Snow gave a fake smile at her. "Are these trick tarts? Are you planning on taking out the Everdeens?"

It was meant to be joke, a dig at her games. Only he laughed, the faint blood from his throat stained his white beard. Zoya gave a forced smile, but hadn't said anything. Snow wished her a goodbye, but was frozen still. This meant Zoya was to be the one to walk away, heading to Katniss' house, rather then Peetas, as she original planned.

Zoyas heart was racing as she stood on the porch, gloved hand knocking on the door. Snow in the corner of her her eye, watching, made her feel like she was seconds from dying. She hated he had such a powerful control over her, hated that she coward so much under his stare. The way her heart raced, feeling like she wanted to throw up, becoming dizzy, wishing she'd rather be dead then have him looking at her.

"Zoya." Miss Everdeen open the door, clearly taken back by the sight of the girl she'd only met once.

"Please, let me in." Zoya whispered, before giving a wide smile and speaking loudly. "I was so happy to get your letter in the mail!"

When Zoya threw her arms around the woman, she saw Snow over the trembling girls shoulder. Ms Everdeen pulled Zoya in, her own forced smile. When she shut the door, Zoya exhaled, looking down to try and calm herself down. Barley being able to breath was something she'd became use to, yet it didn't make it any better each time.

"Let's get you some tea." the older woman touched Zoyas arm gently. The Butterfield girl nodded as she followed her toward the kitchen. Buttercup hissed at her from the couch. It caught Katniss' attention from the other room, because there'd been only one other person, aside herself, that the stupid cat hissed at.

"Zoya." Katniss spoke, seeing the back of her head. She couldn't recognize her no matter what, though, after all she'd done, after all she continues to do. Unlike Peeta, it wasn't suspected for Katniss and Zoya to not see each other. The best of friends, the capitol says. Katniss had come to Five almost every month to meet Zoya at a small pub. Every time she saw her, though, it felt like the first time she saw her when she got off the hovercraft from the games.

Zoya hugged Katniss, her hand pressing into the braid thrown over her shoulder. "Sorry for barging in."

"Snow saw you?" Katniss pulled back, Zoya nodded. "Did he say anything?"

"No, nothing life threatening, anyways." Zoya answered in return, hand dipping into her basket. "Strawberry Tart?"

Katniss had to smile at her. Taking it, but not eating it. She knew better by now. The kettle screamed as Ms Everdeen poured mugs of tea. "What did Snow want? Why did he pay you a visit?"

"Thanks, mom." Katniss said as the two mugs were placed before them.

"Thank you." Zoya gave her a charming smile. She smiled at the pair, rubbing both their backs, before giving them the chance to talk alone.

"He thinks no one's believing our love story. He knows something is up." Katniss said, warming her hands up with the mug rather then drinking it.

"Why? Because there hasn't been any movement from the two of you? No interviews?" Zoya asked, knowing it had to be odd that neither Peeta or Katniss had wanted to do any of the optional interviews. Zoya did hers, only because she was terrified for her life. She'd done plenty on her own, a few with Finnick, because the capitol loved to see them together.

"He had someone watching me." Katniss hesitated, because she wasn't sure if she wanted even more people to know. Was this girl talk? Was this what normal friends did? Talk about the guys they kiss? "With someone else."

Katniss knew Zoya would understand without her having to go into detail. She nodded her head, understandably. "He's always watching. You have to be very careful."

Katniss knew it, now more then ever.

"The interview later will be the perfect chance to reassure everyone. Pretend to love him, make people believe there is absolutely no way that the star crossed lovers weren't actually lovers." whatever emotion she was hoping to get with her words, she failed. It was clear Zoya despised talking about Katniss and Peetas love story, maybe that was worse then not seeing either of them. She wasn't sure.

"He'll be happy to see you." Katniss said, that brought a small smile onto Zoyas face. "There's a back door, if you sneak out, no one will see you head to the bakery. There's a little path."

Zoya exhaled. She did this every time she was to see him again. It was more fearful then enjoyable, as she wished it was. She wanted to see Peeta, more then anything. But the thought in that back of her head, how if absolutely anyone saw or suspected anything, they'd both be dead.

•

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