｡･::･ﾟ★,｡･::･ﾟ☆ - ☆｡･::･ﾟ★,｡･::･ﾟ☆
  𝘛𝘢𝘺𝘭𝘰𝘳 𝘚𝘸𝘪𝘧𝘵 - 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘦
｡･::･ﾟ★,｡･::･ﾟ☆ - ☆｡･::･ﾟ★,｡･::･ﾟ☆

Daemon's words reassured her more than he could ever imagine. She had thought he would define her breakdown differently. But she had not yet told him about her deeds and then, at the latest, she expected his despise. He would hate her and send her away again, she was sure of that.

Rhaenyra had hugged her friend tightly and then led her into her home. The others followed and Aruna's companions were led by the princess's children to their new chambers and her children were immediately taken in by Daemon's daughter.

Seeing everyone so well received warmed Aruna's heart, but she remembered their similar arrival in Winterfell and how bad it got for them all. She did not want to get her hopes up too soon again.

Pastries and tea were already waiting for the four of them in the room to which Rhaenyra had led them. It had high ceilings, was quite dark, but plenty of light and the warming fire in the fireplace made the room cosy

"How was the journey?" asked Laenor politely, after everyone had sat down at a table. Aruna would have preferred to lay her head on the table.

She had been fooling herself for the last few weeks, judging everyone else and blaming them, yet she wasn't entirely innocent of her fate either and she was beginning to realise that. She was disgusted with herself. She had changed too much and for a long time she was no longer the naïve and self-reliant young girl she used to be.

"As the last few months have been. Exhausting." She replied exhaustedly and leaned against the back of the chair. She didn't know herself why she was still wearing her mourning clothes, but somehow she was doing it for herself and her guilty conscience instead of for Brandon.

"You lost your husband, you have every right to take your own time and grieve for him." Laenor replied sincerely. She would have loved to tell her good friend the truth about her husband's death, but she couldn't. "How are the children?"

Aruna felt nauseous and her corsage was suddenly far too tight for her. Her skin began to itch in the places where Brandon had touched her and even after two months, some of his wounds could be seen on her body. There would probably always be scars where he had hit her, bruised her and and scratched her when she had resisted his abuse.

Aruna became nauseous and her corsage was suddenly much too tight. Her skin began to itch where Brandon had touched her and even after two months some of his wounds could still be seen on her body. There would probably always be scars where he had hit her, bruised her and scratched her when she had resisted his abuse.

"Cassian still looks for him a lot. It's still hard for him to understand everything at his age." Her voice was very quiet and her gaze was fixed on the table. The delicious warm pastry smelled so good and immediately reminded her of her time in King's Landing, but she did not eat a piece and did not touch the tea. "I don't know if Edith is aware of the situation. I think she's repressing quite a lot. She has become very quiet and talks less."

Aruna was very worried about her children. They had changed too fast and that could not mean anything good and that was all Aruna's fault.

"Their father has passed away. I think that's normal." Rhaenyra joined in the conversation. Her voice was also unusually soft, but very gentle and careful. "Jace and Luke had a similar experience when their personal tutor passed away."

Of course, everyone knew immediately who Rhaenyra was talking about. Ser Harwin was not only her lover and instructor of combat for the boys, he had also been a mentor and role model and, above all and most importantly, the father of her three children. The princess had suffered a loss as well, but she was not allowed to mourn in public.

Slowly, Aruna nodded and then watched the prince next to her, who was pouring tea for everyone and holding a cup in front of Aruna's nose. He hadn't said another word yet, but his gestures spoke for themselves. A storm was raging in him as well as in the southern woman.

Gratefully, she accepted the cup and took a small sip, then held the warm cup tightly in her hands.

She was glad that the four of them were alone in the room and could talk about everything undisturbed, even if she didn't know if she wanted to.

"How have you been in the last few months?" the dark-haired woman changed the subject. then put down her cup to take the dark veil of mourning from her hair. It was almost as if all her guilt was hanging in that veil and pressing down on her head.

Nothing remotely interesting had happened with the Targaryens. Laenor was still in mourning for his sister and Rhaenyra was very concerned about her father's deteriorating health. Aruna remembered her last meeting with the king in Driftmark. Even then he had looked more dead than alive. For all of them it was only a question of time of time until Rhaenyra had to take her rightful place.

Aruna had the greatest respect for her friend. At the announcement that Rhaenyra must take the inheritance after her father, the princess had had little choice. But now the King had sons and the mood within the family was deteriorating

Her own life was far from perfect, but she did not want to change places with Rhaenyra. Aruna would never be able to rule over the seven kingdoms, she knew that.

"When we heard of Brandon's death, I wanted to leave for the north immediately, but Rhaenyra talked some sense into me." Reported Laenor, looking sincerely at Aruna. They were all far too kind to her. It had become an unfamiliar feeling. "How was it?"

"Well, it wasn't a nice feeling to see your husband dead and covered in blood." The widow replied, her voice breaking. A thousand voices and screams had been echoing in her head since she put a pillow on Brandon's face. There was no longer a moment of silence in her head and she thought she was going mad too. The guilt was just too much and she wondered if Brandon had also felt guilt after his abuse?

"Can I ask how he died?" At Daemon's question, everyone avoided direct eye contact with the widow. He had never known what was appropriate and what was inappropriate, so he got a warning look from his niece. "How can you ask her that now, Daemon!"

"It's okay, Nyra. Thank you." Aruna interrupted the princess. In her hands she held her veil so tightly that it almost snapped. "It looked like a suicide. There was a short letter with him." She reported what she wanted people to think. Someday she would tell her friends the whole truth, but not now. Aruna needed these people and she didn't want to lose them like her brother. "Rumour has it that I have driven my husband mad and into madness."

Maybe it really was like that. Maybe she really had driven him mad and that would explain his change and his nasty behaviour towards her.

"I can't imagine! Please don't tell yourself that, Aruna. You are a good person and not at all capable of such a thing." Laenor only wanted to encourage and comfort her, but his words achieved exactly the opposite.

The woman felt warm and dizzy. She could not continue to sit here and talk about her dead husband. Aruna just felt weak. "Don't say that, because I am not." With her words said out of desperation, she made the others wide-eyed because her voice sounded stroppy. "I'm sorry. I can't do this yet."

Aruna stood up and hurriedly left the room. Unintentionally, she had made the situation worse and drawn attention and suspicion to herself again.

No one had ever told her how bad it was after killing someone. No matter where she was she felt like a stranger, whether here, in Winterfell or Driftmark and King's Landing. She longed so much for a place where she could be herself. A real place to c all home.Aruna had lost touch with herself many years ago. She no longer knew who she was.

"Please wait." She had not gone far from the room when she heard a voice behind her. A voice she had longed for and killed fo. Automatically she stopped as she had never been able to refuse him a request. "I didn't mean to offend you with that question. I am sorry."

With small steps he approached the woman and put a hand on her shoulder. She still held her veil still tightly in her hands and her head was lowered. Aruna had waited so long for this moment and to return to him and now she could not open her mouth to say anything.

She felt so pathetic for herself.

"Shall we walk a bit?" he asked, but didn't wait for an answer. With his hand on her back he led her through the unfamiliar corridors to a contraption. From here they could see over Dragonstone all the way to the sea.

Aruna leaned against the railing and looked at everything. It looked almost like Driftmark, but Dragonstone was very special because it was Daemon and Rhaenyra's home.

Daemon stood beside her and looked at the broken woman in front of him. She still looked like his Aruna, but at the same time she looked so different. Gently, he put his hand on hers, which was resting on the railing. He would have liked to take her in his arms.

"I did something bad-" Aruna said, her voice breaking and she searched for words. His hand gripped her tightly. "I am afraid you will despise me if I tell you about it."

"I could never, you know that. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to either. I'm not forcing you, my lady." My Lady had become a nickname for her from him. It was not just the polite form of address but a loving term of endearment with him. Listening to it calmed her somewhat.

For a while now, her own body had been disobeying her. She got shaky hands, wobbly knees or had to vomit - just like that. And all because she was not made to take someone's life and had done it anyway.

"Thank you." For a brief moment she leaned her forehead against his shoulder. They both enjoyed the silence that followed. All that could be heard was the sea which was so close.

Daemon breathed a kiss on the top of her head and then took the silly veil from her hands and threw it down over the balcony. Startled, she bent over the railing, still trying to catch the piece of cloth, but she couldn't.

"Why did you do that?" she asked, looking at him with her big eyes.

"Why did you do that?" he repeated her question, stroking her dark curls.

"What are you trying to say?" Aruna now looked at him in shock. Did Daemon suspect something? She tried to look confident by standing up straight. "You need to detach yourself from your suffering." He replied simply, leaning his forehead against hers. "I'm not forcing you to do anything, but at some point you have to let it all out."

The Targaryen's words said so much and were a mystery at the same time. The man always seemed to know everything and when he didn't, he covered it up with his persuasive manner.

With anyone else, Aruna would have felt pressured, but with him she only wanted to tell the truth. She wanted to trust him with every little secret and share everything with him. She had missed the man so much.

"Can you show me our temporary chambers?" she asked him, unintentionally diverting from the subject. She would have to be lying if she said she didn't miss her veil. "Please."

The Targaryen man nodded and took her hand to lead her back through the castle. "Please don't say that." He asked her sincerely, squeezing her hand. He would never admit that her choice of words had hurt him. Aruna was finally by his side after all these years and from now on everything would be fine. He wanted to make Dragonstone their home, but he would also accompany her to the ends of the earth as long as she was happy.

"I want you three to stay with me. They will be your permanent chambers unless you don't like them." Daemon explained himself as he showed her the first room. They had gone up some stairs and had led her into a long hallway. Several doors led to different rooms, but Aruna couldn't remember them all. Then they arrived in the wing with the chambers.

"I thought of Edith when I thought of this room. It's right next to Rhaena's rooms and not far from yours or mine." Daemon stopped at the door as Aruna walked through the room. The chest with Edith's things was already in front of her bed and her dress was on the bed. It seemed she had changed and just thrown her dress on the bed. Aruna had to smile at the thought of her daughter.

The room was decorated in the typical Targaryen colours and even though the room had hardly any furniture, Daemon had still taken the trouble and decorated the room more homely with small details. By the window was the most beautiful dressing table Aruna had ever seen and she didn't even have to touch the hairbrushes and mirrors to see how expensive they must have been.

"We can change or replace anything at any time." He reminded her as he watched her. "That's really very thoughtful of you. I'm very grateful to you." She walked back to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. For a moment he made her forget everything and her heart warmed and the pain faded into the background.

"Edith deserves to be spoiled like a true Targaryen." He paused for a moment before continuing with his trademark grin. "And I will spoil her, you can't stop me from that." Explained the man with silver hair to her, making the woman giggle. It was the first time she felt remotely happy again.

He then showed her Cassian's room and Daemon eyed the woman in front of him again. His Aruna had not only grown up so much in the last few years, she was broken. He would love to find out the circumstances surrounding this. But, that Aruna was not innocent of her own suffering, he did not know.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she wanted to know from him when she saw his thoughtful face. By now they had arrived in their own new chamber. The room was furnished similarly to Edith and Cassian's. Daemon had really made an effort.

Daemon began to grin and shook his head slightly. "I just can't believe you're here now." He confessed to her, moving closer to her and then placing his hands on her cheeks. Gently, he then kissed her forehead. "That makes me very happy."

In his arms she slowly began to relax and as if automatically she leaned against him and put her hands on his shoulders. "It has been a very long journey..." she began to tell him with a beating heart. Again she felt the old familiarity between them and felt safe with him. "Daemon... I did something bad that I don't think I can live with."

You couldn't read any of his thoughts in the man's face and he didn't seem to show any reaction because he listened to her first before he said anything and that was what she admired so much about him.

He took her hand and led her to the big bed. Aruna had never seen such a big bed before and when she sat on it she thought she was sitting on clouds. She quickly took off her shoes and lay down on the soft bed. "This is amazing. It's like I'm on clouds." She breathed enthusiastically, making Daemon laugh. He took off his shoes too and lay down next to her. "I'd love to take you up in the clouds sometime." He whispered to her as they lay facing each other.

It was a nice thought, but an unrealistic one. Aruna had no Valyrian blood and being near a dragon frightened her, even if she had to get used to it.

Nervously, Aruna took his hand and played with his fingers and when she finally began to speak, facing her mistakes for the first time, she avoided all eye contact with him. "Brandon... didn't take his own life." Confessed herself quietly in a shaky voice so Daemon could barely understand her. "I did."

He looked at her intently with his violet eyes and the pain and suffering in her eyes pained him as well. He had been sceptical about the Stark's sudden death, but he had never believed Aruna was capable of such a thing.

"Okay." He took her hand and kissed the back of it.

"Okay?" she asked, confused, looking at him questioningly. She had expected any reaction, but not something like this. He didn't seem to mind at all. "I killed someone and you're just saying okay?"

"So did I." He replied simply, smiling slightly at her. He knew how hard this conversation must be for her, which was why he didn't want to make it worse and instead deflected it onto himself.

"But you fought in wars! I only in my marriage-"

"Marriage can be a struggle too, I know that too." He interrupted her and squeezed her hand. Aruna didn't even know what to say to that. She was a lady and not a warrior, as he had once said, and he was the Prince Rebel who had already gone to war for her.

"You were right then. The rumours were all true." He continued to deflect on himself, looking at her sincerely. "I killed my first wife Rhea, pretty much for the same reasons you killed Brandon."

She could hardly believe what she was hearing from him. Aruna had more or less accused him of this at the time, but always hoped it wouldn't be true. She didn't know how she would have reacted to this information then, but today this news actually calmed her down in a strange way.

"Why are we so rotten?" she asked herself more than she asked him. Laughing, he just shrugged. "I guess you can see us as the definition, that we would do anything for each other." Now Aruna had to laugh too.

She felt lighter to have finally told someone about it and now to learn that Daemon had killed his wife for the same reasons so many years ago touched her, even though it was such a brutal and vile act.

"Thank you for your honesty." Daemon kissed Aruna's forehead and then stroked her cheek. "I can't promise you, but you will learn to deal with this guilt." He tried to encourage her.

"How do you cope with this guilt? I feel like it's crushing me." She then confessed to him quietly as she stroked her fingers over his arms.

"I don't." He answered her honestly and her heart broke at his words.

They had both been through so much and been through so much until they were finally together again. For nothing in the world would they risk this happiness again and be all for staying together until the end of their days.

It had been hard for both of them and still it was all so unreal. Finally, Aruna was on Dragonstone as she should have been many years ago. Finally Daemon had the chance to get to know his eldest daughter and to treat her like his daughter. Already he loved this girl as much as his twins and he would try to be a good role model for Cassian too. He was Brandon's son, but also a part of Aruna. Of the woman he adored so much.

Aruna leaned over him and put her lips on his again after such a long time. Immediately he returned the kiss and put his hand on the back of her head to hold her close. They exchanged a passionate kiss and held each other tightly in their arms.

They had risked so much and been through so much that now they had to try to make everything better and be happy together so that it was all at least somewhat worthwhile.

After all, they had killed for each other.

***
I love them sm...♡
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