15 July

After a brief be that as it may long break, everything showed up to be because it was undoubtedly more troublesome than I expected especially compared to the beginning crave of an essential get-away in Seoul. That's when I recalled that I was truly applying for one of the first popular idol groups in Korea. Which was accurately the time when got hollered at by my guide. "Do you intend to waste my time like this each day?" the disgrace of being late additionally lit some and of want of doing more better. After quickly getting my things in arrange, I got driven by the cadence. The burning stream of words was taking my breath as well as the examine warming up inside the room. "What is this? You're giving up as of now?" His words kept pushing me to the edge and by the time I wrapped up the tune, an overpowering breath gotten absent my lips, an breathe out of mitigation.

"I see you're not only apologizing with words, do you?" His eyes communicated a certain shimmer of proudness. In case his lips weren't shaping a grin, his tone was without a doubt sending the same feelings. In spite of the as of now depleted state I was in, I inquired for a following tune, willing to prove my worth indeed more and settle the air. As the foundation music begun once more, I let go of any compelling thought and unleashed my voice. The verses appeared to be flooding the room once more, the warm scattering, permitting the burning fire of certainty to require control. Without indeed a look at my mentor's eyes or responses, I centered totally on the tune, living through each word at greatest, my hands soon beginning to act on their claim and motion for an indeed more seriously execution.

"Stop, stop, you're doing extraordinary! Take a breather." He chuckled right after the ultimate sound of drums was listened from the speakers. I nodded and walked by his side, setting the amplifier down and exchanging it with water. I swear, it never tasted better...

"Will there be another circular of today's preparing? I can still oversee a tune or two." I inquired, turning my head to Jungkook.

"Nah, not truly. Wouldn't need to alarm you from you to begin with day. We have 7 days of preparing, people will be envious by the time we expert all of them." He said, smirking and winking at me unquestionably.

I proceeded drinking the water, stowing away my grin and chuckle, my heart beating with both pride and energy. As much as I thought boot camp would be full of challenges and sweat, it appeared to have a sweet scent. Perhaps it was fair my energy for music and performing, however once more, I may confess that the once solid uneasiness of the audience was presently blurring, and I seem only thank Bangtan and my guide, Jungkook, for that.

July 16

"...5...6...7...8! And now a pause! Everyone did a great job! We pause for five minutes." As everyone began to leave their positions, satisfied with both the performance and the prospect of unwinding, our tutor said. I struggled across to the chair on the opposite side, sat down, and looked down at the ground while holding the water bottle in my hand. The group of participants from today was so smart that it almost made me feel inadequate. I felt left out and behind since the compliments and proud grins that were meant to lift us up during the performance were not making it to me. Even though it may have sounded self-centered, I believe that my need for attention was simply the desire of rising above everyone else, a spirit of a true artist.

My mentor's voice resounded all through the room, taken after by his hands clapping an encouraging beat. "Go ahead! Time's up! It's time for the moment half of today's training!" His eyes following each one of us as we returned to our positions. With the music playing, I ventured forward and not only sang, but also danced to express my sentiments to the fullest. I was unconscious of anything else around me and that everybody fell noiseless, just gazing as I proceeded to fly through the verses with huge assurance. The music seemed to be fading out once again and that was the moment I stopped dancing, heavy breaths and frantic gazing around replacing the voice and dance moves. Not only that I was expecting a good pair of scolding, but also a thought of being kicked out crossed my mind.

What followed though, broke every single thought I had. "That was... AMAZING! Did you guys see?! Now that's what I call an artist!" My mentor said, his words not being able to keep up with the emotions that were flowing through his eyes. His gaze sent more than a million praises which could never be contoured better. I felt it all, his trust, praise, compassion. Everything became a paradise, despite the place it rose from.

He grinned playfully before adding. "So even with being late you manage to amaze, don't you? I'll keep that in mind."

July 17

As I rolled around in my bed, switching the alarm off, because... at this point, who needed an alarm for 7 am when he wakes us up at 4 am? I sighed again and got up from the bed only to be urged once again, dressing up taking less than 5 minutes and breakfast being announced to take place on the way. We ran to the bus, our mentor guiding us to our seats, soon enough feeling the swift move of the wheels taking us to wherever destination was planned. A few voices whispered, confused and curious at the same time, questioning one another, hoping they would form an idea of what was planned for today's trip.

I got up from my seat and walked over to our mentor, bending discretely, whispering. "It's so early... everyone is so confused, where are we going?"

He smiled and whispered back. "High standards shine the brightest when put up high, don't they?"

I blinked and darted my eyes, until his next words got my attention once again. "You will... love it, I'm sure of it." His smile turned into a satisfied grin as he patted my back. I nodded and giggled to myself while walking back to my seat, a strange feeling of excitement replacing the frustration of simply waking up before sunrise.

I looked out the window and could see the Namsan Tower getting closer and closer. I was expecting the bus to take an unexpected turn and lead us to another place, but, despite that, it continued its way towards it. Something was feeding on the fire of nervousness already present in my heart, my eyes widening unconsciously by the time we stopped right at the base of it.

"How can this be...?" I whispered to myself, following our mentor's words as he told us to step out of the bus and follow his lead. We headed upstairs, the way up to the very top of the tower creating both a memorable atmosphere but also growing the impatience.

"And he we are! Enjoy the view, ARMY. A 360 view of Seoul, the city which will host the grand finale in just 5 days, and you will make this city proud!"

I smiled and cheered along with the other participants before making my way closer to the railing, leaning on it and simply admiring the view and the sparkling lights in contrast with the dark, mysterious night. A view which I could never forget... A paradise indeed.

"The view from the top of Namsan Tower at night."
-Seoul, South Korea

July 18

As I stepped through the door, the studio looked brighter than ever. I settled everything down, beginning with a small morning stretch, passing the time and waiting for my mentor to come over. It couldn't take that long, right?

After a while, which seemed like years throughout the silence, I started looking around and checking the time, trying to remember if maybe I forgot something or missed out on any piece of information. Not long after, two voices, chattering from outside the door seemed to be getting closer.

"... and as I was saying... are you sure this is the right place...?"

As they swung the door open, we locked eyes on each other, the coffee cup in my hand hitting the floor in an instant from the sharp cry coming from one of the two members.

"Yah!!! For the love of God! When did you pop up?!"

"Taehyung-ah! You're scaring him!"

"He is scaring me too! He wasn't supposed to be here!"

"Yes, he is supposed to be here! You-"

"Jimin-"

"Jungkook-ah asked us to take care of this today, remember?! You already forgot?!"

"It's not my fault, all your teasing got me on edge!" Taehyung said and threw his hands in the air, stopping to one of the seats, pouting and holding his chin in of hand. He looked and me and sighed before speaking.

"So, we're going to take care of you... What are we even supposed to do..."

Jimin came over and laughed looking at the two of us exchanging confused looks and making faces at each other. "I don't know what Jungkook-ah wanted to teach him so... how about we make it simple? Can you sing something for us? Fake Love? It should be easy enough for a warmup... High notes too..."

"Fake Love? Nooo uhh..." My voice came out too much as a whine, getting laughs from both Taehyung- ssi and Jimin-ssi.

"Then what? We can't just sit around all day?"

"Nope, but we sure can continue our talk about how you dropped your cherry lipstick in the coffee mug this morning..."

"Taehyung-ah, no!"

I perked my ears and wheezed, looking at them. "You did what?"

"Nothing!-" Jimin urged, covering Taehyung's mouth and speaking before he could make a sound. "How about we go and buy some flowers crowns? It can be your chill day, I'm sure Jungkook-ah will drain your energy from tomorrow anyway."

I nodded and smiled, still giggling as we walked out the studio and made our way down the road, soon running around and sticking flowers into each other's hair, laughing and taking pictures. It was completely amazing, yet unreal. I could not believe that even with this pressure of the finale, a few tiny things and aroma of Sakura flowers could rise my mood to the fullest once again.

July 19

The bonfire lit up as a shooting star landed on the beach. I widened my eyes and followed the person's lead as we approached the group and the members. I found myself a place to sit, the smell of food and the soft music mixing with the swift whispers of the wind creating a whole ambience.

Jungkook and Namjoon both got up at the same time, roaming their eyes around the group along with the other members who seemed to be very busy fighting over the last pieces of mandu. The two rolled their eyes and got the group's attention, turning the music down before switching it to the instrumental tune of "Ma City", everyone widening their eyes. Following the gestures and the guide of them, we all grabbed our microphones and started singing along, creating a strong chorus, sometimes breaking into laugher between verses.

Exchanging glimpses and smiles, the bonfire came alive with our souls, the harmony lighting up the fires in our own hearts. It felt magical, holding hands and screaming the tops of our lungs, unleashing all our emotions through the flow of words. The other members dragged us around the bonfire, joining hands once again dancing and going around in circle. Soon enough the circle widened enough to take someone in the middle, my senses spiking. I was currently holding hands with Jimin and Jungkook, the smirk on Jimin's face growing out of the sudden right before they both pushed me forward out of the line.

"Go go! Take the lead! Don't stop!" He urged, clapping his hands shooing me from the line and further into the middle of the circle. A thought of protest sparkled into me right before I pushed it away, looked into his eyes, nodded and ran to the very middle of the circle, continuing to dance and sing even louder, holding the rhythm of the whole group.

The end of the song was the time I ran back and joined hands with Jungkook and Jimin, everyone raising their hands up in the air and cheering, jumping and laughing. It was amazingly perfect, everything seemed to mend impeccably, the expressions on each and every one of us radiating with joy. I was totally not expecting something like this to happen, yet again, Seoul and its surprises never fail to amaze me. The bonfire continued engulfing us into a warmth, not only on the outside, but also on the inside. Connecting with each other even more, with each second passing through the whole night, not even regretting skipping sleep.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

July 20

The sweat and heavy breaths were draining me as much as the song was, all my focus turning to my mentor's words, left dumbfounded and taking a moment to process.

"Why did you choose me as your mentor?" He said, stopping the music.

I was blinking and trying to gather my thoughts, something boiling and sizzling my skin, probably the heat of the intense training. At first, I thought he asked sarcastically, discretely pointing out a mistake I made or to mark his impatience. My thoughts instantly dispersed as he spoke again.

"Are you going to answer me...? I'm getting curious here." He giggled and gave me a towel and a cold-water bottle straight from the fridge.

I looked at his eyes and blinked a few times before answering. "Well... Honestly, I choose the people I find myself into, someone who won't be just my mentor but also my friend. Hardworking and always seeking higher and higher is something present in all members' hearts, but the thing that attracted me was the aura. A bond between hearts and not only a simple lesson." I smiled and came closer to his ear, whispering. "And there is the personality... the teasing and always seeking to overrun even your own fellows." I smirked noticing that he was smirking back playfully. "But I have a question too."

He raised an eyebrow and laughed, nodding in response. "Yes, sure, ask away. I guess that is fair enough."

"Why did you let me perform in front of everyone during the application day?"

"Ah... that is an easy one. Minimum stress."

I choked on the water. Was he kidding me?

"What do you mean minimum stress?! I am doing my best!"

He laughed and patted my back, taking the water, winking and chuckling. "No no, minimum stress for me. You are the best out of all."

"How about- Huh-" I widened my eyes even more and gulped, tilting my head. "Best?"

"Of course. Just like you choose the mentor who matches your traits, I choose my trainees just the same."

Was he trying to say I have the same potential as him? Right before I could answer myself, he stepped back.

"Now, let's get back to work, time is running out!"

And the music once again echoed through the whole room, taking over my mind and body, teleporting me right into the fantasy of the lyrics, my whole being focusing on them.

July 21

"Are you ready?"

The level of nervousness I was into just raised at my mentor's words. I looked at him and nodded before speaking.

"Yes, but I need some extra luck and confidence now."

"Confidence? You have to rely on your own powers-"

"Shhhh, come please. Trust me, Jungkook-ssi."

I dragged his hand and made our way outside, taking the roads to the Steam.
(Cheonggyecheon Stream)

It was amazing to walk along the stream, yet the night was imminent. So, we rushed and hurried towards the waterfall. The view was gorgeous, people walking around even during the latest hours, but something seemed to be attracting their attention more than the bright lights and crystal-clear water.

"Do you want to make a wish together, Jungkook-ah?" I asked, taking out two pennies from my pocked, handing one to him, now heading for the Wishing Well. He smiled and agreed, the idea creating a certain pride in his eyes. Just as we looked at the Well, its design was completely utopic, perhaps something even close to a portal towards fairytales, or something magical where all the wishes would come true. However, I lowered my eyes to my own hand, the penny tightly fisted in my palm. I closed my eyes and whispered to myself.

"I reached Seoul as a trainee, without even a single idea of what it could throw at me.
Now, I wish to come back to Seoul as an idol and create my very own things and world."

I opened my eyes, focusing on the Wishing Well, and with a skillful throw, I landed the penny right inside, smiling and sighing in a certain relief. Jungkook seemed to have already thrown the penny, just watching over me.

I fought the urge of curiosity, not asking what he wished for and only continued to head back to our cabins. The walk back was silent, but for sure louder than any words. We both shared the same nervousness for the grand finale, yet again, the wishes tightened the string towards our hopes. It was nothing that could go wrong if we believed in each other and trusted ourselves as well.

The bond was strong. The night was heavy. But I managed to sleep and let myself rest and keep a perfect shape for the following events.