•••

I WAS ON THE VERGE OF LOOSING IT, perhaps, maybe I had already lost all the sanity I had gathered for the trip. Things had clearly taken a turn for the worse; not only the fact that we were stranded but also the fact that there was nothing we could think of. Letting out strings of curses, I watched Valen examine the car once more, a scowl evident on his features.

Tugging at the roots of his hair, he let a groan escape his mouth. “We really have to do something.”

I whipped my head in his direction, hair flying into my face, and at the same time we spoke: “But, what can we do?”

“I asked, you tell me,” he had ordered.

And he should've known what to expect—instant retaliation of course. “No, I asked.”

He had groaned again, whilst I rolled my eyes, and together we paced around the car, glaring straight through it's tinted glass. I looked up at him, he was now leaning against the car, glaring at the cars speeding past us—none stopping to help.

“How does one not notice a power drain?” I drawled, stopping my pacing and leaning on the car next to him.

He shot a scowl at me. “I’m sorry,” he drew out, “I was too busy listening to all your arguments to pay attention.”

I scoffed. Jerk. “Whatever.”

“I need to call the mechanic.” Valen quickly whipped his phone out, and called one—he also needed to inquire about the cost and time it'd take to get the car fixed. I waited patiently, and the storm inside my head seemed to calm down a little.

It didn't take long for a mechanic to arrive, and when he examined the car, he said the most unfortunate thing. It would take long and needed to be towed. And whilst Valen went around to look for help, I grabbed our bags and belongings out of the car.

When Valen came back, he had a small smile on his face and I didn't return it—he shouldn't blame me because I wasn't a girl who loved things getting out of track.

“Okay, I know we don't know anyone here and there's no we can just wait here till the car is serviced but—”

My eyes narrowed as I folded my arms over my chest. “Let me guess, you found a hotel for us to stay in.”

“Yeah,” he ran a hand through his hair. “It’s really close, just less than half a mile, we can hit the road in the morning and still make it.”

I sighed, letting my hands fall to my sides. “It’s not like we have any other option.”

This couldn't be that bad, I thought and simply smiled before twirling on my feet in the opposite direction. Valen jogged up to me, then we both looked up. Night had slowly befallen us, wrapping the day in it's dark blanket, filling the inky night sky with it's specks of light.

I had never seen stars glow that bright before.

Before I knew it, we were both walking towards the direction of the hotel, our hands pointing upwards—at the stars that burn brightly.

•••

DISCOMFORT HAD BECOME A LOAD ON MY SHOULDERS—the kind when you're sleeping on the wrong end of the bed—and I was on the verge of losing again. I could've sworn with anyone that I was tired as hell but with the situation at hand, I couldn't even blink an eye. Valen was standing besides me, fingers threading through the soft waves of his hair, and it was the very first time I heard his voice sound so tense. “Isn’t there any other way?”

The young lady at the receptionist desk stared at us apologetically, fingers adjusting her glasses on the bridge of her nose. “I’m sorry, but it's the only room available.”

No, I thought, there's no fucking way we are sharing the room together.

I was distressed to the moon, and Valen's face was emotionless, hands tucked in his hoodie pockets. Despite wanting to hate the circumstances, I couldn't help but think that everything would be fine because it was him and he was different, and I weirdly trusted him so much. 

I sat in the hotel lobby that was illuminated with soft, welcoming light—the kind that was like sunshine in gentle hue—taking in the architecture; finely drawn designs on the ceilings and walls, and photo frames plastered on the walls. There was a weird warmth I felt, maybe because the hotel felt cozy or perhaps the fact that I trusted Valen enough to share a room with him.

“You okay?” Apparently, I wasn't the only one worried about my comfort. Valen’s eyes held concern when they fell on me, only for me to give him a nod—not able to tell him exactly how I felt about everything.

Things didn't take too long. Slowly but surely, I was already walking down the hallway with Valen and a lady whilst being fascinated by the sight, because I had never been to a hotel before. I hadn't said anything to Valen yet, however, deep down, I was grateful—grateful it was him and no one else.

I wasn't scared at all anymore just—maybe, thankful.

And when we had arrived at our room, only one thought ran through my head; I thought wrong. I was scared—freaking scared, and the whole situation had gotten awkward. Apparently, when the hotel said they had one room available, they had meant—only one bed and room service.

The lady had left us to ourselves, leaving me gaping at the room; the only window was a floor-to-ceiling window, viewing the beauty of California, and in the end of the room was a couch, right opposite the king sized bed, neat and tucked in.

It didn't take too long for me to be awkwardly seating on one edge of the bed, with Valen on the other, and none of us saying anything. I had contacted Bella earlier to tell her about our situation but she did nothing to ease my worry, only that she'd tell the guys that we were okay.

And now, I had told myself I wasn't sleepy, I was going to stay awake and figure things out. Tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear, I proceeded to sit down on one of the chairs in the room, burying my face in my palms.

“I’m sorry we got into this,” Valen's baritone voice filled the thick atmosphere.

I sighed, lifting my head from my palms, gaze perched on him. “Stop apologizing, it's not your fault.”

Valen's expression didn't budge, he still had a guilty expression; his eyebrows clashed together and his lips were pursed in a thin line. “Frosty. . .do you trust me?”

My heart fluttered at my nickname—there was no way I could get over that name, and everytime he said it, I became flustered. Straightening up in my seat, my eyebrows knitted in pure confusion as to why he had asked me that.

“Why—”

He didn't let me complete my sentence, his expression still the same. “I’m serious. Do you trust me?”

“I do,” I said—maybe too quietly, dropping my gaze to my shoes, fingers numb.

“That means you're comfortable spending the night in the same room with me?”

I was fidgeting, the images of that night and the end result in the morning hurting my senses—all that leading me to snap. “It’s not like we have a choice, if there was another door to this problem, oh good lord I would walk right through it.”

His head fell, gaze everywhere but at me and that's when I realized how harsh my syllables were—when I didn't mean it. What had I done? There wasn't a thing that could change the fact that he was different; no one had ever respected my feelings or opinions to that extent, and I couldn't even appreciate it. My words made me hate myself and want to hurt myself for hurting him.

“I. . .I didn't mean it like that Val—” I began, standing abruptly from my seat  in an attempt to walk to him, however, he stopped me. I just stood their dumb; tongue knotted and body frozen—I never failed to mess things up in my life and push the ones I loved away from me.

“It’s okay,” he stood up, hands running through the waves of his hair and gaze fixated on the door. “Just freshen up.”

And then—he walked out of the room.

•••

I COULDN'T COUNT HOW MANY TIMES IN LIFE I'D FUCKED THINGS UP, and the number of times I didn't know how to correct those things were extremely high. And whilst I sat alone, hands combing through my hair, my gaze was infact still on a particular place— the door Valen had walked out of.

It had been twenty minutes since he walked out the door and I had already freshened up, still having no clue how to fix things. For starters, I had to apologize, and of course—explain to him why I reacted that way.

Several pacing around the room later, I was ready.

It took me multiple steps to the dining area, few to the lobby, lounge, and a lot to the back of the building where the swimming pool was until I found him. He was standing right in front of the pool, hands folded over his chest, and gaze perched on the stars—all in their glory of twinkling delight.

The air was cool, making me hug myself in an attempt to keep warm. And it was either Valen didn't notice my presence or he just chose to ignore but regardless, I walked up to him. I was standing right behind him, having no clue of what to do but I knew one thing for sure—just words wouldn't be enough.

So, I took a bold step.

I wrapped my arms around his torso, resting my head on his back, and relishing the warmth that radiated off his body. I felt his body tense under my touch, all before it relaxed when he realized I was the one. We both stayed quiet, until I decided to voice out my thoughts.

“I’m sorry,” I blurted out. “I didn't mean to hurt you.”

He didn't say anything, just kept quiet, and the silence hurt me more than ever before—why wouldn't he talk to me? There was this feeling—feeling of wanting to be with him—and the thought of him not wanting the same scared me.

He loosened my arms from his torso and turned around to look at me. “Did you search everywhere for me just to apologize?”

I shook my head. “No.”

His eyes were searching mine, waiting for me to continue and I was flustered, again, the words stuck up in my throat. I looked everywhere but him, bracing myself for what I was going to say.

“I didn't mean to say that, it's just that I. . .I’ve been hurt before—by a guy, a guy I trusted so much and I wasn't just hurt I was used and betrayed,” I paused, staring right back into Valen's eyes that had softened. “It happened at a party. I've never liked parties and my mom certainly hated the idea of me attending any, but he assured me that everything was going to be okay. Well, he was my best friend and because I trusted him, I snuck out and went to the party with him.”

I shut my eyes close, the incident replaying in my head—those painful memories were the same as my nightmares, having no choice but to leave only when I let in all the wonderful things around me. Anxiety was threading itself in the depth of my soul and when I thought I was going to loose my balance and fall into the pool, Valen wrapped his arms around my waist to keep me steady.

I opened my eyes and took in an extremely deep breath.

Valen looked at me, face oozing with concern. “It’s okay if you don't want to continue.”

I shook my head. I wanted to. “Nothing felt right at the party, but I thought I was safe with him. He had gotten me a drink, and after that drink, I felt dizzy, so dizzy that I could hardly move. He told me I needed rest, little did I know it was a trap. I fell unconscious in his arms, no clue what exactly happened that night. But, my mom was crying and furious the next morning and I didn't know why, so she told me.”

I looked away, taking another deep breath. “He had almost taken advantage of me. He would've gone further hadn't been for someone who walked into that room that minute. And I kept this inside of me all this while because I didn't need pity and I didn't want to be known as the girl whose dignity was almost taken away.”

After telling him all that, I felt weak again, half of the walls I had managed to put up all those years were crumbling down into dust. I saw this emotion in Valen's eyes—pure anger and digust—his lips beheld a scowl and I felt his arm tense around my waist.

What did he think of me?

I felt the pad of his thumb wipe a tear that I didn't realize had fallen, and the feeling it gave caused me to shut my eyes for a second at the sensation of his skin brushing mine.

“I will never hurt you,” he whispered softly, his hand traveling down to grip my chin in a soft but firm grip, lifting my head up so I could looked straight into his eyes.

I nodded slowly, his enthralling gaze not wavering. It hadn't dawned on me how close we stood, and how my body was pressed up against his, until I felt his fingertips brushing lightly against my exposed skin, snaking around my waist. The touch ignited fire in me, making me weak in the knees and I had to place my hands on his chest.

His hand left my chin and made it's way into my hair, leaving a sleek hot trail on my skin. My heart thudded an erratic beat in my chest when his eyes flickered down to my lips—then he leaned in, his scent like a combination of intoxicating danger. And he was so close, so close that I could almost touch him, almost taste him.

“You can tell me to stop,” his lips brushed against mine and my eyes fluttered close for a second.

I wanted him to kiss me, to make the desire in me burst up into flames, and that's just all I needed to tell him.

“No.”

Immediately the words left my mouth, his blue—usually light, serene—eyes transformed into the shade of the midnight. Dark and enigmatic, pulling me in, and then—he claimed my lips. It was a brush at first, so light that it was almost as if it wasn't there. His kiss was gentle and tender—a promise that he'll be here for me—and the way he caressed my skin and applied pressure to my lips made me thirsty for more.

I pressed my body against his and tightened my arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer, only for my fingers to move into his soft, silky hair. With my fingers wrapped around the strands of his hair, I tugged at them slightly, earning a low guttural groan from him, making my legs clench at the sound.

Lips locked, I trailed my hands down to his chest, feeling the pace of his heartbeat quicken beneath my fingertips. Fingers clutching at the material of his shirt, he responded instantly, his fingers trailing from my waist to the arch of my back.

I was cold, he was warm, however, he was melting me.

Nipping on my lower lip, his hands untucked my shirt from my trousers, fingers grazing over the newly exposed skin and a soft moan slipped past my throat in the process.

His lips grazed mine, and when we pulled away, I was dazed and left gasping for air; pulse racing as his eyes locked with mine for a lingering moment. I was close enough to see that his ocean eyes had stilled. His lips were parted as if mine were still on it and I couldn't help but pull my lips between my teeth, licking it involuntarily.

Then I grinned.

He returned it, and I couldn't help but think that the little things he does made my heart flutter. He stared at me like I was worthy of it, took his time to talk to me even when I was being difficult, and his reckless smiles—made me weak in the knees.

What was this?

“That just happened,” Valen breathed, and my face flushed at my next confession.

“This is my first kiss.”

“Well, how was it?”

“Amazing.”

Valen's chuckle took over the cold air and I suddenly realized that I missed his warmth. “I’m not surprised it's your first, you've probably punched all the guys to even let them have the courage to kiss you.” he joked.

Of course he'd joke.

“How dare you?!”

The only thing deduced in the moment was his enthralling laugh before he took off.

We were running, well I was chasing him, and I was grinning as well, not bothering to find out why every part of me was tingling. And at a point, Valen had stopped to grab by hand and pulled me along. We got into the building, but we didn't slow our steps down. My heart was pounding, steps getting lost between the laughs we shared, and then—we were running down the halls, shoes tapping on the tiled floor.

It scared me how unbothered  I was about those new feelings and emotions that coursed through my entire body but I couldn't question those things.

We had stopped running, and our room was right in front of us—but neither of us stepped in as we were too busy catching our breaths. And when I looked down at our intertwined hands, I couldn't help but like how perfectly my hands fit in his.

“Are we good?” I blurted out, eyes meeting his.

He grinned, amusement dancing on his features. “Yes.”

I smiled, smoothening down my hair which was already messy due to the air that blew whilst we ran—and even Valen's hair was messy on his forehead. And when I looked back at him, he had a faint smile which made me chew softly on my lips.  He unlocked the door of our room and got in first before I followed suit, urging him to shower.

And when he stepped into the bathroom, I walked up to the king sized bed to pick up my bag and then placed it besides the bed. Smiling to myself, I took off my shoes and climbed the bed, all before getting comfortable on it. Raising my index, I brought it to my lips, only to gently caress it, feeling the tingles from where Valen's lips had touched mine, all before letting my mind wander around the last few minutes.

Midway through my thoughts, I heard the ensuite bathroom door open, revealing a drool-worthy Valen. He was just in a towel that hung on his hips, trails of wet droplets descending from his damp hair–to his neck–down to his toned abdomen. My eyes followed his movement, watching his arm that was covered in the inky art lift up to push back the fallen locks on his forehead

“I’m sorry, I forgot we were sharing a room,” he spoke, snapping out of my daze,.resulting in my cheeks flaring.

I cleared my throat whilst blinking a few times to hide the fact that I'd been gawking at his glistening abs. “Relax, you don't see me complaining.”

What did I just say?!

Valen chuckled, walking out of my sight to change whilst I took in deep breaths to calm my racing heart and collect my thoughts.

And when he came back in a tank top and sweatpants, my heart ran everywhere, mouth dry and hands clammy. It was the way the tank top hugged him perfectly, his biceps flexing as he arranged his bag—It was a sight for the sore eyes.

Damn me for gawking.

I was walking on a fine line amidst several things—It was the way I watched him walk around the room in his glory of enthralling addiction, and how he ruffled his damp hair every now and then.

It wasn't until he plopped down on the couch that I came back into the understanding of reality. I glanced up at him. “Hey Val?”

“Mhm?”

“Thanks,” I muttered in the softest spur of words, feeling the heat in my cheeks. “For. . .always being here for me and looking out for me even when I can be really difficult—and in all honesty, I'm completely comfortable staying here with you.”

“Hey,” he started, eyes on me. “You don't need to thank me, I'll always be here for you, okay?”

I nodded, and he grinned. “Now that's over why don't you bless me with some of your frost?”

“Shut up,” I rolled my eyes. “I was trying to be a bit nice.”

“You don't need to,” he smirked. Fuck. “You'll loose your spice.”

I flipped my hair over my shoulder, and threw him a wink. “Don’t worry darling, my spice isn't going anywhere.”

His eyes widened, and I felt satisfied, all before he let out a chuckle. “You surprise me, Carla marshall.”

“Don’t you like surprises?” I tried to hold my self from the excessive huskiness in my reply, but my mouth was already twitched up in a smirk.

“I do,” he replied in a heartbeat, however I didn't have a reply, and I wanted to keep the conversation going but the night was getting old. I was having inner conflicts on whether to keep staring at him or look away and the air around us had gotten dense.

“We should—”

“Yeah, it's getting late,” he ran his hand through his hair. “Take the bed, I'll take the couch.”

“Uh. . .”

“Just go to sleep,” he chuckled, sitting carefully, all before tossing his head backwards.

I laid against the pillow slowly, my eyes still very much on him because his neck would be sore for sure, and even though he didn't say it, he was uncomfortable.

“Valen?” I questioned, and he hummed. “Are you sure you're okay staying on the couch?”

“Don’t worry about me, go to sleep.”

“I can't,” I whispered, then sighed. “Not when I see you like this.”

He turned to me. “We don't really have an option.”

I sighed, and sat up. I had only taken a portion of the bed, and my mind was already heading towards something I never thought I would be okay with. “The bed is large enough, I wouldn't mind if you join me, but you'll stay in your corner and I in mine.”

He was genuinely shocked. “You’re okay with that?”

I nodded, not meeting his gaze. “Don’t even try to talk me out of this.”

Valen chuckled and with small steps, walked to the bed, dropping down on it before making himself comfortable. He stretched his arm and sighed, relishing the comfort. “This is comfy.”

I bit my lips, watching him get comfortable, and he caught me in a heartbeat. He flashed me a smile and I looked away, snuggling closer to the pillow, all before snapping my eyes shut. It scared me how most of him had been stamped into my mind in the brightest shades, and it made me wonder if it'll last; solely because good things never lasted in my life.

But one thing was clear—I was falling, and I was falling fast.

Before saying anything, I apologise for the late update and for any mistakes. I was really excited to write this chapter because I finally got to grant all your
wishes by
my two babies share
their first kiss.

I hope this chapter made up for being late it's about 4,000+ words—I know we all hate long chapters but I couldn't stop writing, I apologise.

Let me know what you thought of this chapter and the kiss, was the pace too fast?

btw, tyasm for 8k reads on valiant, it means a lot to me.

Stay golden <3