When Tristan's lips press against my aching core my heart thuds unsteadily, deep within the center of my chest. The organ is pumping in a near vicious manner, like a wild animal trying to free itself from its' cage, which is essentially how we've come to find ourselves in this predicament; we want to break free from ours. With every thunderous beat anxiety, fear, want and pure need flow through me. I need this. I need him. Because I need some sort of release.

Nervous tremors roll down my thighs in time with the movements of his hands as they take the black scrap of fabric away from me, exposing me to him. The hungry noise that rumbles out of the back of his throat, combined with the equally hungry look on his face, has me sucking in my bottom lip with instinctive anticipation. I've seen that look, though never on him, but he wears it quite well.

Tristan pushes himself up slightly then kneels back before peeling off the shirt he'd been wearing. He never wore one to sleep so his body isn't an unfamiliar sight, but in this moment, his taught, fit abdomen and arms corded with muscle, has raw desire fluttering in the pit of my stomach. It does so even more when his hand rubs his hardened length through his sweats.

This is when the reality that I've not been on birth control for over half a year sets in.

"Tristan," I murmur his name in an anxious manner, "do you," I swallow uncomfortably before continuing, "do you have a condom?" He instantly gets as rigid as the cock in his hand. "You don't, do you?" A deep breath blows out his nostrils, eyes closing tight before shaking his head no in confirmation. Because why would he? It would work to my parents' advantage if I got pregnant by this man.

After a moment those hazel eyes find mine again, still simmering with lust, "we may not have a condom but that doesn't mean there aren't other ways to satisfy each other." And with that, he lowers himself back into the position that he'd previously been in, except now there is no barrier between my flesh and his. The kiss he gives me this time, wet and deep, tongue pressing against a certain part of me, has a noise tearing from my throat that I don't think I've ever made. With each suck, roll, and flick, I find myself climbing to a precipice that I can't even remember the last time I've been to. My hands thread through Tristan's dark-colored locks, holding him close as my legs begin to shake against either side of his face. My head lifts off the pillow beneath me slightly and my mouth involuntarily drops open, only the choke of a noise can be heard as the pleasure starts coursing through my veins. When the sensation slowly begins to subside I collapse onto the bed, untangling my fingers from Tristan's hair as I do.

Release. Pure, unadulterated release in the form of an orgasm. Months, it has been months since I've had an orgasm. I'd begun to forget just how amazing one felt.

"Came so hard it left you speechless." A small giggle leaves my lips at his statement. "I want to watch you do that many more times," he says, prowling up my body with a predatory look. "I just wish I could do that while being inside you." As if to reiterate his point, two fingers slid into my aching heat with those last two words, making me to cry out into the room at the sudden intrusion. His hot breath tickles my neck as he leans into my ear, "I want to fuck you so bad, Dani. So so bad." And I would be lying if I said I didn't want the same. "I want to bury my cock right here," the words a growl as he pumps in and out of me. "I want you to take all of me, over and over."

"Take me then," the words fall from my lips in a wanton whisper causing him to tense, fingers momentarily pausing inside of me before continuing to move again. "Tristan, fuck—" His thumb rolls over my clit in just the right way and I'm blinded by my own pleasure. But I want more. I need more. "Tris, please." He pulls away from my neck, hazel eyes searching mine. Whatever he sees there has his fingers leaving me.

"You're sure?"

Yes? No? I don't know. I don't even know what I'm asking for.

I give him a nod regardless.

"Dani, I'm going to need verbal confirmation that this is what you want." The way he'd said the word 'this' implied that it meant so much more than the act. His eyes roam my face in a hesitant manner before saying my name again, like a question, "Dani?"

"I need this. I need you," I admit, and though my words are barely audible he'd heard them.

"You can have me, Dani."

He reaches down and frees himself from his sweats before placing his stiff self at my entrance. With one swift thrust he pushes up inside of me. A gasp escapes my lips at the sudden intrusion of him at the same time he lets out an intense pleasurable groan. It's been so long since I've had anything inside me, aside from his fingers moments ago, let alone this. Tristan's movements are slow at first as we both get accustom to the feel of one another, and then his lips find mine, giving me a deep, passionate kiss as he finds a steady pace. With each forceful buck of his hips he pounds up inside of me and the sensation of it feels amazing.  It's bliss with a touch of pain. It's a certain type of momentary heaven in this hell and I never want it to stop.

"Fuck," he curses in a grunt, breaking away from our kiss. "It's been so fucking long."

"I know," I agree, understanding what he meant.

I'd venture to say Tristan's gone just as long as I have, if not longer, without sex. Every night and day we've spent together, getting close to one another, but never this close. Neither of us getting any kind of relief from the tension until this moment.

"Tell me you're close," his words a plea. I give him a nod as I begin to tighten on him, knowing that I am nearly there. "Dani, I'm so fucking close. I'm going to—"

"I'm almost there," I pant up to him and watch as he visibly shudders, trying to hold himself together. "Oh— ah—" I choke on the gibberish words that begin to leave my mouth as my bliss overtakes me.

"Shit shit shit." Tristan pulls himself out of me and lifts his body slightly before coming all over my stomach. "Fuuuuuuck—" His body spasms and jerks with the last of his orgasm. Once he finishes, he collapses on the bed next to me, letting out a satisfied exhale as he does.

Neither of us say anything for a while. We just lie there like that, catching our breaths as the reality of what we'd just done sinks in. I close my eyes and see two familiar faces that has guilt pummeling through me like a freight train.

Torey will never forgive me.

The thought has tears threatening to escape me but before they can I hop off the bed.

"Dani?"

I don't say anything as I make quick work of heading to the bathroom.

"Daniela?" Tristan's voice is full or worried concern now. "Dani, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," I manage to choke out through the tears that'd started to pour down my face. "I—" I swallow back the emotion, "I just need a shower." My feet move even quicker when I hear him start to come towards me. I'm just able to shut the door and lock it before he tries the handle.

"Dani, come on, please," his voice is desperate, the tone full of some emotion I can't quite place, "please, just open the door. We should talk about this."

"There's nothing to talk about." I feel something wet touch my inner thigh which has me looking down to see the evidence of what we'd just done dripping from my nightdress onto my thigh. "I... I just need a shower." With shaking hands I carefully take the garment off, not wanting to get any more of it on me, and throw it into the bathroom trash. On numb feet I stumble to the shower and turn the water on. Without a second thought, I immediately step inside. I can't even be bothered to flinch away from the initial freezing stream.

Stupid. I'm so fucking stupid. Torey will never forgive me. He'll hate me. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. So fucking stupid.

I feel lost, like I've completely lost myself. And with the previous thoughts swirling around in my brain, comes the release of a harsh, regretful sob.

✩✩✩

After an hour, maybe more, spent skulking at the bottom of my shower, I step out and wrap myself in a towel. When I open the door there's a pang of self-loathing that rolls through me upon seeing Tristan sitting on the edge of the bed with his head hung in his hands. He looks up slowly, but I can't make my eyes meet his, so I head over to my dresser.

"We shouldn't have done that," his words are said to my back in a monotonous, emotionless manner, "it was a mistake."

A mistake.

And, although a part of me agrees with that, there's another part that still feels hurt by it.

"I'm sorry," I blurt out as I fumble to get clothing over my body.

"Don't apologize."

"Why?" I can't help but ask, still not making eye contact with him as I head back to the bathroom to hang my towel up.

"Because you have nothing to be sorry for, that's why. Neither of us do, Dani."

"I doubt Torey and Brooks will share that same opinion."

"We're in a unique situation."

"A unique situation?" I ask incredulously, eyes finally finding his.

"Yes." His features are guarded as he continues, "we're two attractive individuals made to spend all of our time together, sleep together, be a family with one another. It was bound to happen sooner or later. You have no reason to feel guilty."

"But all I feel is guilt!" I can't help but shout.

"It happened. It shouldn't have. But it did." He stands up from the bed and walks over to me, towering over my body as he looks down at me. "We both needed that." He caresses the side of my face in a tender fashion. "I don't regret it. You shouldn't either."

"You said it was a mistake."

"It was. But it's not one I regret."

"It can't happen again."

"I know." And even though he'd said the words, the way his jaw marginally ticked, told me he feels otherwise.

A/N:
And now we know what's going on in Dani's head. Who's ready to hear from Torey and Brooks? I know a lot of you miss them but you'll hear from them soon.