“Sadly enough, the most painful goodbyes are the ones that are left unsaid and never explained.”
― Jonathan Harnisch,Freak

Ardent’s POV:

My vision blurred as I stared at his seething form.

Anger oozed off him, he was looking monstrous. Just how Madeline described him.

My little brother.

My hands were tied behind my back, ropes cut into my skin, numbing my wrists. My eyes struggled to adjust themselves- my glasses probably rested at a corner of this grotesque, dark basement.

I was already numb. Broken.

As if the light had left me, leaving me into the chaos of darkness. A darkness so consuming, so mesmerizing….. so inviting.

I gave him a slow smile, my breaths coming out in short pants.

My body burned from dehydration.

But it was nothing compared to the pain in my heart, the pain that was my doing.

I killed her.

With my own hands.

I killed my Madeline.

My gaze slowly traveled to his crutch. I forced a smile on my face, the one I knew would irk him.

I needed him to kill me.

So that I can meet her.

“Not so stout are we?” I mocked him.

His glare turned glacial, if gaze could freeze, it would freeze this whole room by now.

So that I can apologize.

“Now, as you can see I am not stout-” His voice grumbled through the dark and hollowed space, echoing on the stinky walls, “It would be a matter of time before I kill you and finish that lowly life of yours. I am not in the mood for tortures.”

Somehow the situation presented itself as a dark cruel joke in front of me.

Whatever he had, it was supposed to be mine but hey, I never complained about that. I was always happy with what life had to offer. I didn’t need the luxury of the extravagance Victors had to offer nor their powerful nickname.

I was content with what I had.

As my younger brother practically rubbed salt on the wound called ‘Family’ and ‘Nicknames’- I could only seat here, wounded, pained- and witness the cruel joke life played on me.

“Lowly life?” My gaze turned cold as I stared into his icy eyes. A dry laugh escaped me despite my best efforts to hide the storm of emotions that raged within me.

A smirk lit up his face, it seemed like he took notice of my little sore spot.

“You know nothing of me….” I slowly uttered through the cacophony of the pain that rang in my ears, “So, do not speak of me like that….”

His little cold smirk widened as he discovered my weakness. I guess monsters like him fed off weakness.

“So… family is a touching subject to you?” he looked menacing, “But Ardent you yourself said you slept with Madeline. Then how come you claim to have belong from a noble family? I thought nobles don’t have other’s sloppy second?”

Rage boiled within me as my suspicions were confirmed.

He saw Madeline as a prize.

She was just a showcase for him.

He didn’t truly love her.

Like I do.

“I DID NOT HAVE YOUR SLOPPY SECOND!” I spat with vehemence.

He let out a mocking laugh, “You contradict yourself. Decide first and then speak.”

“I wonder how your noble mom raised such a disgraceful son….. No etiquette, no language….”

I didn’t know how to feel.

My mother wasn’t noble.

She worked as a maid for him.

And she killed my Madeline.

“Not even an ounce of it, you are pathetic.”

My hands wiggled themselves, begging to let them free.

I wanted to punch the crap out of his pretty face.

He barked out a laugh, “Shame.”

Suddenly, his hand went to his belt and he swiftly pulled out a gun and fired a free shot in the air.

My eyes widened as my heart started racing wildly.

I knew it would be coming sooner or later.

Sooner or later……

Suddenly the weight of my blood soaked shirt was too heavy on me. Suddenly I was aware of how much pain my body was in. Every single cut, every single punch. Every single blow I took from him for the past couple of days.

So this is the end?

“You saw that right? It’s a working gun. Now spill, who hired you; name, if not name then face; who the fuck are you and how much ransom the lady paid you.”

I looked around, taking a look at the surrounding of where my death awaited.

So this is how I die?

Several thoughts rushed to me, filling my core.

Meeting Madeline had changed my perspective on life. I dared to dream of a new world with her.

This is not how I imagined my death would look like.

I had imagined my death would be in my Madeline’s arm, in her warmth.

But not before spending a contented life with her.

Travelling around the world, laughing together, smiling- basking in each other…..

I blinked several times.

Without my glasses, the room was nothing but a gray frenzy. It seemed awfully dull.

I deserved it.

For killing her.

I was too numb to feel that pain, too numb to even react.

I just wanted it to end now.

I wanted to see her again.

“Speak!” he barked.

“I can’t!” I yelled out, in frustration, in anger. The lady who technically killed her was…. my mother, Lindy and I can’t…..

“I won’t…” I mumbled, “I was paid a hefty amount.”

“And you are telling me to buy it?” The cunning bastard laughed, “By the looks of it, the hirer has something more than just money. What is it? A precious family member?”

Clever.

My mother didn’t care for me an ounce, but that did not mean that I would stop caring for her.

She was my mother after all.

She deserved it.

She deserved to see her son killed in front of her eyes because of her own mistake.

I knew she was lurking somewhere behind the door.

“No. No one. I don’t have a ‘family’..” I breathed, “I hail from a noble one.”

“Good,” It was the only warning I got before the first gunshot hit me on my shin. Soul shattering pain traveled through my body, causing me to scream.

Madeline….

Maman….

I panted heavily as a single tear drop slid down my cheek.

My body shook, I could feel my body slowly giving up- readying itself to carry me to the realm of dead.

“Speak,” Cut his command through the blurry haze of the nothingness that surrounded me.

I could feel my life being sucked out of me, slowly. I could feel myself slipping away.

Where is maman….

Was she as cruel as to not visit her son for the last time?

The door suddenly burst open and ran in the woman I hated but I loved at the same time. She was breathing heavily.

“Marienne…. don’t kill him… you aren’t a killer son….” Came my mother’s soft voice.

So she came.

I cracked a small smile.

I blinked a couple of times and then decided to close my eyes, preparing myself for what was to come.

As we are a guest of this world….

Death is bound to come.

Be it sooner.

Be it later.

Death is a must.

An unavoidable saga.

I felt tears blur my vision. Some of it was out of joy, some of it was out of pure anguish. Some of it was of happiness.

I never knew I was capable of feeling this much emotions at a single spur of moment.

My mother was looking frantically back and forth between me and then Marienne, her shoulders slumped, as if she had fought a battle.

Within that piece of a moment I felt pity for both my mom and Marienne.

He was fucked up and didn’t know how to feel, he was not normal.

I earnestly pray that he finds someone who makes him feel normal.

And someone who would actually stay with him.

He looked at maman as if she was a lunatic and then said disbelievingly, “Tante? You hold sympathy for him? This measly scumbag?”

I wanted to laugh and tell him that what he actually was to me, I wanted to end this game here.

But I didn’t want him to kill himself.

Often, ignorance is compared to bliss and I chose just that.

“I can kill him and I will kill him!” He turned to look at me.

It is said that, the people at the brink of dead can sense certain human emotions that are often concealed masterfully.

I didn’t know if it was one of those heightened feeling, but what I saw in his eyes, baffled me.

Fear.

He was afraid that his ‘aunt’ would leave him too.

“Speak!” He seethed, “Who was that woman?!”

“Marienne…. police… they will….” Maman tried.

“Where were they when Maddy was killed?! HUH?!”

He was fueled by his fear.

I closed my eyes and let out a breath.

End everything.

I am exhausted.

“Now give me something….” I could feel him losing his last piece of sanity slowly, “Anything…”

My eyes darted off to maman who was shaking, but was frozen to the spot. Her eyes were wide.

‘Tell him..’ She mouthed.

I smiled from the corner of my lips, mocking her.

I am not going to give her the satisfaction.

She had to live with the guilt of my death and Madeline’s death.

She had to.

I saw Marienne waving his hand, as a dismissing gesture. She bowed shakily and then gave him a pleading look- backing away slowly.

Tears were glistening into her eyes.

I honestly couldn’t tell what she felt for me.

Was her vengeance so immense to let her son die like this?

Or maybe she wasn’t meant for salvation?

I closed my eyes, a pair of smiling emerald eyes flashed in front of me.

“Say your last prayer…” he gritted out, his eyes darkening, “I have never killed a person before…. In fact I despise it. But you leave me no choice.”

I took a deep breath.

If I die, the secret dies with me.

But then again, he might become more unstable than he already is and finally give into his darkness…..

‘Madeline had a diary… That’s all you are ever getting.” I blurted out before I could comprehend anything. All that registered in my mind was the raw pain I was feeling combined with the agony of my mind and a drop of ecstasy that was contributed by the thought of Madeline.

“What?” He queried, taken aback.

The pain from the knife stab earlier was becoming more excruciating now, I gritted my teeth and then fixated him with a hard glare, “I said that’s all you are ever getting. Whether you like it or not. I need to do something right.”

His hand slowly raised the gun.

I smiled and closed my eyes.

Finally.

I was going to be free.

We were going to be free.

Maman’s smiling face floated in my vision….. caressing me like breeze of spring.

I never got to say goodbye to her.

Then again, I don’t think she deserves it.

I do hope she found her happiness.

And the smiling face of maman blended into another face. A face that held more life, more spirit.

The face of my beloved.

Her green eyes crinkled under the sun as she laughed, her hairs swaying gently with the breeze.

A face for which I didn’t bother to conceal my identity.

I was guilty of killing her.

So I let myself get tortured by this monster.

I deserved it.

The face of her as she slowly called me, like a siren.

The sound of gunshot resonated and the green mixed with something white.

Everything went blank after that.

White.

White.

I was floating…..

Like a feather…..

And then…..

Withering away…..

Slowly…

Slow..

Throughout the haziness of white, I saw a blurry figure. Her hair was dark, she seemed so far away from me, yet I felt like I could cross this distance.

“Lin?”

Chapter 31 from Ardent's POV!