At breakfast, it's clearly visible that some kids didn't have the best night sleep. Or, well, went out.

I spot Lelia and the brunette boy I'm sure is named Thomas walk in at least twenty minutes after Newt and I did. By the time they've taken the food they want off the long table, Newt has already brought away our dishes.

"Morning," Thomas greets, a groan mixed in his voice. "Got a hangover too, Newt?"

"No."

"Oh, you look like you do."

"I was about to say that."

Newt sighs. "Thank you, Tommy. And Lelia."

He doesn't look like he has a hangover at all. I've never seen someone look this... fresh (?) in the morning.

"You're welcome."

Another boy slides next to me. So now it's Newt and Lelia in front of me, Thomas and whoever this boy is beside me. "Hey. You're Lyndon, right?"

"Yeah." I smile at him. Besides the weird vibe, he seems nice enough. "Who're you?"

He holds out his hand for me to shake. "Winston. Newt mentioned you. And I have an idea for you and Newt."

Newt raises an eyebrow. "Well?"

The boy, Winston, runs a hand through his dark hair before he takes something out of his pocket. He straightens the paper with his hand, lies it down on the table, and points at it. "A bucket-list for you two."

Newt trails his eyes over the paper. "What does
STMBPLBBWAM mean?"

"Steps To Make Boring People Less Boring By Winston And Minho."

After sliding the paper over to me, Newt buries his head in his hands.

STMBPLBBWAM
• Get drunk
• Make out
• Steal from Janson (and blame someone for it)
• Start a rumor
• Change Ava's shampoo with dye
• Curse (with other words than bloody, Newt!)
• Have a big mouth against Jorge

When I look back up from reading it, frown deep and mouth open, Thomas and Lelia look at it with twinkling eyes.

"Absolutely not," I decide.

"Boring."

"I don't want to spend my summer in that hut for misbehaving kids!"

"And that's why," Winston tilts his head to the side, "you blame someone else for it."

Okay, doing some of these things could be fun (I guess?), but I'm not gonna blame someone else when we get caught!

Newt pulls a face. "If I'm so boring, why did you even become friends with me?"

"Remember when I met you? It was bevause a bear was chasing me, right?"

"Yeah—"

"That was fake. Minho dared me to get someone's help, and then I randomly become friends with you. Because you're not extremely boring. Just a tad."

Offended, Newt glares at him. "Talking about Minho—"

"Right here." Out of nowhere, Minho appears next to Thomas. "So, Newtie, gonna do it?"

"No. I'm not going to spread a rumor about someone."

Winston rolls his eyes. "Fine. No rumors. But you have to prank someone instead. Like a bad prank."

"And that prank will be on you," Newt and I call in unison. Half frowning and half laughing, I share a look with him.

"Whatever."

Newt's silent for a while. If he says yes, I'll join. If he doesn't, I won't. That's basic logic, right?

Nah, it's not.

"I have a condition," Newt eventually says. He leans back, triumphant. "Lyndon and I complete this list, but we get to make a list for you and Minho to complete, too."

"Can we see the list first?"

Newt looks at me. Flashes a smile at me. "No, you can't."

What's in this food? My stomach did a thing. And I don't like it.

I ignore the feeling. "Lelia will join that, too. The list Newt and I make."

She throws her hands in the air. "What have I got to do with this?"

"Ahw, afraid you won't succeed?"

Her eyes narrow at Minho. "Never mind," she spits. "I'll definitely do it now that he thinks I won't."

"I'll watch you fail miserably."

"I'll beat you!"

"I'll finish way before you."

"Oh, really? That's what she said. But yeah, sure you will."

But instead of the usual replies Lelia gets at these jokes, Minho cocks his head to the side. "Wanna find out—"

"No," we say in unison. Lelia shoots me a glare too, but hey, this is a free country!

"Anyway—" it's Newt who changes the subject. I mentally thank him. "Is it a deal? We make y'all a list before we agree with doing this?"

"I want to see the list y'all make first."

I see Lelia lean in and whisper something in Minho's ear, whose serious face morphs into a grin. "Alright. Never mind. I don't have to see what y'all put on that list."

"What did she say?" I whisper to Thomas.

"That you and Newt will probably put boring things on that list anyways. And it'll be very easy to complete."

***

"It's just making a list," I laugh. "We don't have to go all the way up here."

"No, the sight is nice. We have just an hour before we have to go to those art things." Newt continues climbing up the ladder. It looks unstable. And even though Newt already walks a bit limp, it for sure isn't his leg that's causing the ladder to move like this.

And my face is likely betraying how much I don't like this idea.

"Ah, come on." It's his turn to laugh now. "You won't fall. I promise. It's not that unstable."

I touch the wood. "There's mold here. One crack and the whole thing falls apart. Let's go somewhere else."

His laugh turns into a smirk. One corner of his lips curves up, and a twinkle in those beauti— normal eyes appears. "You're afraid of heights, aren't you?"

"What? No."

"Come on, then."

"Imagine you fall! Or I fall. We don't want that to happen. That would ruin the whole summer! With who am I supposed to share a tent, then?"

"Even if I broke something, I could still sleep in the same tent as you, Lynn."

If I had water in my mouth, I'd choke. No one's called me that before. Either I'm getting insulted by Lelia or it's just Lyndon. Maybe 'son' by Dad.

But I like it.

"Okay, maybe I'm not a big fan of heights, but it's really just the fact that it's dangerous!"

"Seems like we now know which one is actually boring."

I pretend to gasp. "Rude."

Newt climbs onto the surface that's at the end and then holds out his hand. "Come on."

Mumbling some protests, I start climbing. It feels so awful— the ladder's moving below me, my hands are shaky as always, and Newt's full on watching me. "I don't like this," I say, halfway up, unable to reach him yet.

"You're doing great," he assures. "Few more steps."

I nod. The second I'm able to touch his hand, I clasp mine around it, and feel my cheeks heat up. While his hands are slim and warm but not disturbingly warm, mine are sweaty and shaking. "Sorry."

He chuckles. "About what?"

"My hands always shake."

A scoff escaped his mouth. "You think I care about that?"

"I don't know. Maybe." Finally, I've arrived on the surface. I'm still not very comfortable up here, but the sight is quite beautiful. I can look further into the woods, and see the last hints of the sun going up.

Newt's asking me something, I realize. "Sorry, what did you say?"

"How do you paint with shaky hands?"

I shrug. "I'm not nervous when I paint."

"You said your hands are always shaky. So you're always nervous?"

"No— well, wait— no. My hands always shake except for when I paint. Not always nervousness. Though right now, I'm a bit nervous."

"Why? You've climbed up here." He smiles. I've noticed his head tilts a little when he does that.

I shrug. "Still nervous."

"Because of the height?"

"Yeah. Why else?" I look down at my shoes, hiding my still heated cheeks. "Anyway, we should probably start making that list. Add some good things so Lelia and Minho knows we're not as lame as they expect. Give them a real challenge."

"Okay." Newt takes the paper and pen we brought with us. "We should make them do the exact opposite of their personalities, though. We never misbehave, and they never behave. We now misbehave, and they now behave."

"Volunteer to do a task for Janson," I insist, grinning at the thought. Newt nods and writes it down.

His handwriting is neat. A bit curly but definitely good for a boy. And it's readable for sure.

"No cursing for a day," I add. While we have to curse, they can't. "And no pranks."

Humming, Newt notes it all. "They have to do something embarrassing they really don't want to do, though. Minho should style his hair in another way."

I snicker. "Good idea. Lelia should... hm, I don't know. What do you think?"

"Minho should give her something in public, and she's forced to react super excessively and nice. That'll be embarrassing for them both."

"Good idea. He should get baby's breaths." I nod in agreement.

"Ohh, and force them to lose a game they'll do at basketball soon!"

"That's devastating for them." I cover my mouth with a hand to mute the laughs that only keep getting louder. "Okay, Lelia should dye her hair back to blonde. It's her natural color. By the end of the vacation, that blonde will be grown out and she's all natural again."

Surprised, Newt looks up. "She's blonde?"

"With some darker strands," I confirm. "In the summer, her hair gets lighter by the sun, though. Mine kinda stays the same."

His eyes move to my hair, which is usually just messy around my head. Then he nods. "I like it."

"I mean, the black doesn't look bad, but I've always known her with blonde hair until like a year ago. Kinda—"

"I mean your hair, dummy."

"Oh." My mouth stays half open for a while. Once I've recovered from the sudden compliment, I do my best to smile at him. "Thanks, Newt."

"You're welcome." He chuckles.

***

"Steps To Make Misbehaving People Regret Misbehaving By Lyndon And Newt."

STMMPRMBLAN
• Minho does another hairstyle
• Lelia dyes her hair her natural hair color
• Minho gives Lelia baby's breaths and she has to act flattered
• Volunteer to do a chore for Janson
• No cursing & pranking for a day
• Lose a basketball game on purpose
• Go swimming together at night

Minho is staring at the list with a disgusted face. "Lame."

"You're lame if you don't succeed this," Newt points out.

Winston pulls a face. "I thought I was gonna get a list, too."

"Do you want one?"

"No."

"Well, then you won't be getting one."

"And why do I get one?"

"Revenge for sending a bear at Winston and I."

"You seriously think there actually was a bear, Newt? You're the dumbest fuck-face fuck there ever was—"

I clap in my hands. "Oh, looks like you have failed one task today!"

"Shuckiest shuck-face shuck." Lelia nudges him in the side. "Thomas gave me those words."

"Sure sure." Minho runs a hand through his hair. "Since y'all got to scrape one off, can we do that, too? I'm not changing my hair! Also, Blake, you're catfishing your hair?!"

She messes his hair up with a hand. "Here, different hairstyle for you."

"Hey!" He pushes her off. "What color is your actual hair?"

"Pink with glitters."

"Blonde?"

"Yup."

"Hm. Dumb Blonde. What's it gonna be? Blake or Dumb Blonde?"

"Idiotic hair gel freak—"

"Hey, hey!" Thomas slams a hand between them. "Y'all want to scrape one off or not?"

She crosses her arms. "I'm not dying my hair again."

"I'm not changing my hair."

I lean in to Newt's ear. "So he doesn't mind giving her flowers, does he?"

The corners of his lips curve up into a grin. "Neither do they mind to go swimming together."

"Or even losing a game."

"They're really hair freaks."

"Hey, I heard that!"
"Hey, I heard that!"

My smile brightens. "Well, what's it gonna be, then?"

"I offered my sleeping place for you!"

"I offered you a bracelet!"

"You stole it! I deserve to scrap something off."

"No! I need to give you flowers already! You get flowers, I get to scrape something off."

"Let's scrape nothing off." Thomas rolls the paper up and hands it to Minho, who takes it with a pointed expression. "What happens when by the time the ball is, the list still isn't complete?"

"Seven minutes in heaven for the two losers."
"Only able to speak the truth for a whole day for the two losers."

Thomas looks from me and Newt to Lelia and Minho. "Hm. Alright. I'll decide a punishment once it gets so far."

"Fine," we agree.

"Now we should head off to whatever subject we chose."

Lelia turns to the boy beside her. "What have you chosen, Thomas?"

"Sports, obviously." He grins. "You?"

"Sports."

"I'm pretty sure Fry chose arts, too," Minho announces, directing the words to me and I assume Newt. "All the fruits together."

While my heart sinks, Lelia's face darkens. She elbows him in the side, probably a little harder than earlier, then smacks his shoulder, also quite hard, and gives him a dirty look. "Don't make comments like that."

Minho holds up his hands. "Alright, Blake. Didn't know it was a sensitive—"

"Shut the fuck up," she snaps again. For once, I am grateful she's cursing at someone.

Lelia's the only one who knows why I really lost my high school friends. Because she was there when the 'final straw' hit.

About two years ago, when it was already hot outside from the summer and I hadn't graduated yet, it was a casual day as always. I'd gotten used to the comments of some of those boys. You know, the once hanging around the street, smoking and taking whatever kind of pills or powder? Yeah.

The first time I walked past a group like that, they'd, well, called me some things. I figured that next time I walk home, I'd bring my friends, I would feel more protected, or maybe nothing would even happen, but instead, their comments got worse. My friends slowly started taking distance from me as their words began to sink in.

It kind of continued like that. Apparently, I had been looking at my friends as if I wanted to be more than friends with them. The paint on my shoes appeared to be poove. The clothes I wore, literally just the same baggy jeans as them but somehow 'different', were for poufs. Faggots. Whatever, I don't know— I've been trying to forget their words.

By the time, all my friends started to slip away. I mean, maybe in another universe, I'd get uncomfortable too with the thought that my friend might be looking at me like that— but the thing is, I can't imagine that. First of all, I'd rather hope they'd get over it and we could still be friends. Secondly, I never looked at my friends as if I were in love with any of them because I weren't. So I can't imagine what it must look like.

But eventually, there was only one friend left. It was almost summer vacation when that boy, Lelia, and I passed the group. Sometimes they weren't there, but they usually were. I'd sometimes take a whole block around to skip them, but I couldn't think of an excuse to Lelia, and she already knew I hadn't been myself. So the three of us walked past them.

I had watched her already narrowing eyes, both from the sun and confusion, focus on the boy who was doing the all too familiar combination with his tongue pressing into his cheek and then his fist pumping against it. Then the words followed, some inappropriate things about Lelia too, and before I even knew it, she had stepped toward them.

Her words were so crazy that I stood rooted to the ground. Some of the boys slowly wandered off, vaguely impressed, but one stayed there and just laughed. She'd started hitting him and continued yelling until he left. It might've been ridiculous, but it helped. At that moment, I had seen her as such an example. Wished I could stand up for myself or anyone like that. Remembered her words as if it would help me if it happened again.

I can still hear her voice: A faggot, hm? Yeah, sure. You'd probably wish it was you he looks at, don't you? You're probably that full of delusional that maybe you're just imagining that he's gay! I bet that, you fucking idiotic-looking cunt. Fucking horrible-looking Randall Boggs wannabe! Go fuck yourself! And the only reason we're going to leave is because I feel like if I see your fucking disgusting head for a second longer, I'm going to throw up right onto that giant ass nose of you, so you'd probably smell all the vomit even better, since you apparently can smell homos so well! Die!

Well.

Since then, she's been threatening things if she ever saw them again. And though I've always been what I think is a good big brother, I only started loving her more, but also got more scared for her. I was afraid that when she started going out, drinking, taking pills, hanging out with the wrong people, she'd turn just like those boys. Maybe turn her back on me. Realize those boys were right.

Which I still haven't figured out.

How am I supposed to know my sexuality if I've barely ever kissed someone? Do I need to be labeled with a sexuality?

So yeah, if someone makes a comment that could be considered even a little bit in the terms of 'you're gay' and Lelia hears it, they won't ever say it again.

The thing is, she gets so defensive, that I can't tell if she wants to keep harm away from me, or if she's trying to convince them I'm completely straight while I'm now even sure if I am.

Whatever— now I'm just left wondering if Minho was joking or if Newt and that Fry really did come out as I don't even care what. Makes me wonder how they figured things out.