〔𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 ; 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵〕
〔𝘢 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘫𝘢𝘯𝘶𝘢𝘳𝘺? 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺?〕

⋆

TODAY WAS THE DAY that Michael was to reveal the location of a surprise retreat for the employees of his branch. About a week ago, everyone got a memo from Michael indicating that they were going to go 'somewhere special.' In said memo, he indicated to bring various items like a toothbrush and a ski mask. Throughout the days leading up to the announcement, Jim, Willow and Pam theorized outlandish scenarios as to why the employees had to bring said items. And today, everyone was going to find out what Michael was so excited about.

Everybody gathered into the conference room for an impromptu meeting, presumably about the 'big reveal' of the retreat.

"It is now time to unveil the destination of this year's retreat. We are going on a harbor cruise of Lake Wallenpaupack. It's a booze cruise!" Michael announced.

"Alright!" Meredith exclaimed.

"I have a test for business school tomorrow night. Is it okay if I skip the cruise and study for that?" Ryan asked.

"No. This is mandatory. But don't worry, you know what? You're gonna learn plenty. This is gonna turn your life around, Ryan." Michael replied. 

"Michael, a cruise in January? Really?" Willow quipped.

"Hush and enjoy, Willow. It cost less anyway." Michael trailed off.

"Wait, Michael, why did you tell us to bring a bathing suit?" Kelly inquired.

"To throw you off."

"Yeah, but I bought a bathing suit."

"Well, just keep the tags on and you can return it."

"I took the tags off already."

"Well, that's not my fault, okay? Just... we're not going to pay for a bathing suit. Okay, I know what you're all thinking, 'Who is this smart little cookie?' Her name is Brenda... something, and she is from corporate. And she is here, like you, to learn from what I have to say." Michael motioned to a short-haired blonde woman sitting diagonal from him. Everyone silently greeted Brenda as Michael continued the meeting.

"Leadership. The word 'ship' is hidden inside the word, 'leadership,' as its derivation. So if this office is, in fact, a ship, as its leader, I am the captain. But we're all in the same boat, teamwork! Now, on this ship that is the office, what is a sales department? Anyone?" Michael quickly put on a sailor's hat as he pointed to Darryl.

"How about the sales department is the sails?" Darryl answered.

"Yes, Darryl, the sales department makes sales. Good. Let me just explain. I see the sales department as the furnace." 

"A furnace?" Phyllis asked.

"Yeesh, how old is this ship?" Jim piped in.

"How about the anchor?" Pam suggested.

"Ooh! Or the cooking crew?" Willow exclaimed. Pam and Willow started to silently giggle at the latter's comment.

"What does the furnace do?" Phyllis continued.

"All right, let's not get hung up on the furnace. This just... it's the sales. I see the sales department down there. They're in the engine room, and they are shoveling coal into the furnace, right? I mean, who saw the movie Titanic? They were very important in the movie Titanic. Who saw it? Show of hands!" Michael cut everybody off as about half of them raised their hands.

"I'm not really sure what movie you're talking about. Are you sure you got the title right?" Jim asked.

"Titanic?"

"I think you're thinking of 'The Hunt for Red October.'"

"No, I'm Leo DiCaprio! Come on!" Willow snorted a bit, looking over to her brother.

"Michael, everyone in the engine room drowned." Phyllis said.

"No! Thank you, spoiler alert. You saw the movie, those of you who did. They're happy down there in the furnace room. And they're dirty and grimy and sweaty, and they're singing their ethnic songs, and...actually, that might be warehouse."

"What?" Darryl asked.

"The... no no. No, I didn't... Well, okay, in a nutshell, what I'm saying is... leadership. We'll talk more about that on the boat. Ship." 

"Aye aye, Captain." Dwight said. 

'He's such a dork.' Willow thought to herself, smiling.

♡

The group of Dunder Mifflin employees began to board a medium-sized ship. Willow greeted the captain (and ignored Michael's Gilligan's Island references) as she followed Jim and his girlfriend onto the ship. 

After all the passengers of the cruise were settled in, the captain stood in the middle of the stage at the microphone.

"Okay, all right! Welcome aboard! I am your captain, Captain Jack." he said. 

"And I am the regional manager of Dunder Mifflin, Michael Scott. Welcome, welcome!" Michael followed up. Willow turned to face Jim and rolled her eyes. He simply shrugged in response.

"Okay, so!" Captain Jack continued.

"Okay, so!" Michael immediately copied.

"Please," Jack silenced. Michael cowered away a bit as Jack continued his instructions. "The life preservers. They are located underneath the seats, all along the border of the boat."

"But don't worry, you are not going to be needing life preservers tonight."

"Well, we might, okay? Please let me finish. Thank you. So, the Coast Guard requires that I tell you where the safety exits are. On this ship, it's very easy. Anywhere over the side. Not only am I your ship captain, I am also your party captain! Whoo! We're gonna get it going in just a few minutes here." 

"I'm your party captain too! And you are gonna put on your dancing shoes later on! So we are gonna-"

"Okay, Michael, if you don't mind, please, okay?"

"If the boat's a-rockin', don't come knockin'!"

"Michael. Your company's employees are not the only people on the boat tonight, okay?"

"We're all gonna have a good time tonight!"

"Why don't you let me and my crew do our job. You just sit back and have a good time. All right?"

"Okay, yep." Michael fell silent and stalked off the stage like a puppy with its tail between its legs.

♡

Willow sat alone at one of the tables, sipping on a beer and listening to her iPod. Normally she'd sit with Jim and/or Pam, however they were sort of on a 'double date' with their respected partners, so she decided to abstain from them for the night. As Smoke on the Water by Deep Purple continued on, the younger Halpert noticed someone sit down across from her.

"What are you listening to?" Willow quickly lowered the volume and looked up to see Dwight.

"Deep Purple." Willow replied, taking a swig of her drink. 

"Uh, no way. You wouldn't listen to Deep Purple." Dwight stood and sat next to her in the booth. Willow felt her cheeks flush red at the sudden action.

"Yeah? Try me." Willow took one of her earbuds out and gave it to the male next to her. She turned the volume up a little bit as Dwight listened.

"Whoa, that is Deep Purple. I must say, your taste in music is adequate."

"Thank you." Willow smiled slightly as she took back the earbud from Dwight. 

♡

"Listen up all you Dunder-Mifflinites! I would like to talk to you all about life preservers. Now, one important life preserver in business is IT support." Michael began, attempting to continue his presentation from earlier.

"Not now, Mike, we're doing the limbo! That's right, partiers, it's time to limbo, limbo, limbo!" Captain Jack interrupted.

"Limbo, woo!" Dwight exclaimed.

"Alright! I need a volunteer to come up here and hold my stick. Who's it gonna be?"

"Me." Meredith volunteered.

"Me! Me, me, me." Dwight piped up, standing and going over to the captain.

"Uh... usually it's a woman." Captain Jack said. Willow silently laughed to herself.

"I'm stronger."

"Hey, I got an idea! How would you like to steer the ship, Dwight?" Willow's eyes widened at the suggestion. 

"Yes!" Dwight exclaimed. He followed Captain Jack out of the main part of the ship. 

♡

After the limbo ended, everyone started to cheer at the success, while Willow put her iPod back on.

"All right, all right, that was great! Now it's time for the dance contest!" Captain Jack announced.

"But before that, I have to do my presentation." Michael chimed in.

"Nope! Dance contest!"

"Alright, we'll have a motivational dance contest! Hit it!" the DJ started to play an instrumental version of Get Busy by Sean Paul.

"Okay, dancing! It is a primal art form used in ancient times to express yourself with the body!" Michael made his way to the dance floor and began to dance in in an inane and awkward manner.

He passed some of the other passengers and continued to dance. Everyone strayed off the dance floor as Michael began to jump around and wave his arms left and right. Willow put her iPod away and was in disbelief at the sight in front of her.

As Michael started to tap his knees to the beat, Willow motioned over to the camera crew.

"Do you mind sending me this footage?" she giggled. As Michael began to do an awkward version of the worm, Willow's jaw dropped at the sight. She saw her brother come over and sit next to her.

"You're seeing this, right?" Jim asked.

"I asked the cameras to send me the footage," Willow whispered. 

"You're kidding."

"Nope." both siblings turned around and started laughing. 

♡

After Michael's... interesting dance performance, Willow walked over to the bar and ordered another beer for herself. She took a bottle handed to her by the bartender and made her way to the deck. Needing a well-deserved break from everything, Willow put her earbuds back in, put her music on shuffle and stared out into the night. 

She began humming the lyrics to Africa by Toto as she let the breeze hit her face. As she felt herself become one with the music, she didn't realize that she dropped her beer into the lake. As the bottle splashed into the lake, Willow opened her eyes and realized what just happened.

"Oh! God damn it..." Willow muttered to herself. She turned the iPod off as she made her way back inside. On the way, she saw Dwight at the faux wheel, concentrated on 'sailing' the boat. Smiling, she started to turn and go to talk to him, until she saw him next to what she assumed to be Angela. Crushed, Willow turned back and went inside the ship. She quickly found a small bathroom and locked herself inside. 

Willow breathed slowly as she attempted to calm herself down from what happened. Just seeing her with him ignited a feeling of jealously inside like she was back in high school. How she longed to at least share a drink with him that could possibly lead to making out in the back of his car. It was then where Willow's eyes widened at a newfound realization.

"Holy shit, I like Dwight."

♡

"What do you do with a drunken sailor? What do you do with a drunken sailor? What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?" Dwight sang to himself as he steered the ship. He looked to his left and saw Willow Halpert staring out into the night, earbuds in. It was there where he saw her in a different manner. 

The way she shone under the moonlight as her long brown hair blew through the breeze made him sort of forget that she was the younger sister of his notorious 'worst enemy.' He could say that she actually looked sort of, beautiful. But, he had to look away from her for a little in order to focus on his important task at hand. After all, he was responsible for anything that could possibly happen to the passengers, Willow included.

"Hey, come inside and talk to me." Dwight's thoughts were interrupted by Angela coming up next to him.

"I can't. Do you want us to run aground, woman?" the taller male replied. Angela scoffed and walked back inside. Dwight continued to hum Drunken Sailor as he continue to steer the ship. He glanced to his left again, only to notice that Willow disappeared from her spot. Pouting a bit, Dwight continued his task.

♡

Willow exited the bathroom and made her way back to the main area of the ship, running into Jim.

"Hey! I missed you tonight!" Jim exclaimed.

"Hi! I missed you too! Sorry, I didn't really want to feel like a fifth wheel with you guys." Willow replied.

"Oh, don't even worry about it." Jim led Willow over to the table where Pam and Katy were sitting at.

"Hey Willow!" Pam exclaimed, hugging the brunette.

"Hi! And hi, Katy, right?" 

"Yeah, nice to see you again!" Katy said. 

"Hello, everybody, could I have your attention for just a second? Could you listen to me for a second?" the four looked over at the stage to see Roy at the microphone. 

"We were up at the front, and we were talking about what's really important, and... Pam, I think enough is enough. I think we should set a date for our wedding. How about June 10th? Come on, let's do it! Come on, Pam!" Roy declared. The room erupted into cheers as Katy congratulated Pam, giving her a hug. Willow softly hugged Pam as well, although not as excited as Katy. All she could think about was Jim.

Pam walked up to the stage and kissed her fiancé. Willow softly clapped as she noticed her brother was absent from the room. She brushed past Katy as she left the room. 

"Jim!" Willow called out as she noticed her brother staring out into the night. He turned to face her, quickly wiping his face. Her heart broke at the sight of him, running quickly to give him a comforting hug. 

"I'm gonna break up with Katy." Jim murmured.

"Okay." Willow replied. She let go of the embrace and let him go as she began to stare out into the night, thinking. Dwight came into her mind again, and this time she let it happen.