Always thought I was hard to love till you made it seem so easy.

.  .  .

.  .  .

<<nuraan's p.o.v>>

6 Days Ago
[the same night after the phone call.]

"I told you not to call me on this number!?" I couldn't help but speak through gritted teeth at the person on the other side of the phone as I slammed the door to my room shut.

"I-I'm sorry, Kabi--"

"Don't fuckin call me that!" I sneered. There was silence for a while before he spoke again.

"You were right." I frowned. "What?"

I could feel the way he took a deep breath before letting out the words I wished he wouldn't.

"He's back."

. . .

A smile formed on my lips as I looked at her peaceful glowing face in the dim lights of dawn.

Serene.

That's the only word I could think of every time I looked at her. Everything about her made me want to set her on a pedestal and guard that beautiful heart that lies within her feisty self.

She was shy yet bold, soft yet strong-willed, fragile in a minute and tough in the other, she was someone you'd forever wish to protect, but at the same time you know she's capable enough to face her battles herself, she doesn't fear showing her vulnerable side unlike me, in fact, she knows how to embrace it and most of it all...

She's not afraid to walk away.

She. My wife. Was what I would call life itself - wild, free, wonderfully chaotic and a perfectly put together mess.

Her kindness, generosity and understanding nature could turn a lot of shady souls into something great for it's probably not difficult to dance to the sounds of her chirpy voice. After all, she was the flower that can still grow after the forest fire.

I took a deep breath as I looked at that very familiar rosy cheeks, chubby baby face with a pout on her lips, eyes closed, making her long lashes touch her cheekbones, small hands joined and placed under her right cheek and hips stuck up in the air.

Ain't she just a baby?

Slowly reaching my hand forward I touched those soft tempting cheeks I've become so fond of lately with the back of my hand. My fingers brushing gently against her skin.

"How could I not keep you away, when I'm always so afraid of hurting you, baby."

...

5 Days Ago

I placed the dirty dishes on the sink before washing my hands and heading upstairs making sure to loosen my tie on the way as I looked at the watch.

3:45 AM

Good. I thought.

This is probably the prime time of my wife's irregular sleeping schedule, which I've become perfectly familiar with. Precisely from 3:15 to 6:30, you can die and she wouldn't know shits. That's. How deep she's into slumber.

With literally no care of the world.

As usual, I went to my room, freshened up, gave one last look at the files I bought with me before finally getting out and slowly opening the door to the opposite room.

Curled up in a ball her tiny structure came to my view in the dim-lit room before I slowly walked closer, bending down and softly pressing a soft kiss on her temple.

"You looked so pretty today."

...

4 Days Ago

"We're not sure if it's him or his men who seemed to be outside your office today, sir."
I cursed under my breath.

"Is that why I hire you guys? To hear such bullshits in the name of information?"

For fuck's sake it had already been 3 days now.

"We're sorry, Sir, but I assure you that you'll definitely hear about him from us very soon."

I didn't reply as I just clenched my jaw before turning around. My eyes landing on the glass door of her room that led to the balcony only to find her peacefully fast asleep figure through it.

"What about the security?" I asked my eyes still focused on her.

"Sir, we've already spoken to the management department of the DD Law Firm about increasing the security and are personally taking care of it too. In fact, our men are following Ma'am at every step."

I nodded.

"Good. But make sure she doesn't know anything about it."

...

3 Days Ago

"Fuck." I cursed under my breath as I quickly got up from my bed.

7:30 AM

No no no-no-no.

After three complete successful days of avoiding her, I'm not going to mess it up now.

That woman is one of the most difficult to resist and I'm so not ready to let all my effort to maintain a distance until I find a solution, go down the drain. No.

Quickly getting into the washroom, I did what seemed to be my fastest record in taking bath before I got out and grabbed my suit before getting dressed.

"Where the fuck is the damn watc--"

"Language." I froze the moment that familiar voice filled my ears immediately making me stop breathing.

My eyes met those perfect shining doe-like grey orbs and a sudden sense of home flooded through me. Oh fuck.

God, I really didn't realize how bad I was missing that face and the innocent stare she always throws my way. A small teasing and contagious smile plastered on her face as she looked at me.

My eyes landed on her hand that extended towards me as she held my watch in them with a solid grip.

"Sorry," I muttered before taking the watch from her hand. "And thank you."

"It's fine!" I almost jumped at her overly excited voice and drooled at the Cheshire cat smile she gave me before continuously bobbing up and down in her place like she got some spring under her feet.

Woah.

Someone woke up on the right side of the bed today.

Why is she so cheerful, again? Am I missing something? Wait, did she get good food today? Or a promotion? Or... did she find someone new in her law fir.... No.

Fuck.

My eyes landed on her attire and let's just say I missed her mad dressing sense more than anything. Red extra oversized hoodie with white fluffy hood five times the size of her tiny head, green baggy pants with brown stripes and white shoes with a soft toy like looking rabbit standing like a showpiece on them.

Seriously?

They sell those?

People wear those?

Her hair was straightened and made into two tiny half pigtails in front while the rest of her hair was open, falling on either side of her shoulder.

All in all. My wife looked...

A disaster.

But a cute one at that. She's always cute.

Giving her a nod I started wearing the watch only to find her lean in and keenly look at my hand in the process with her mouth slightly agape. Her eyes fixed on my watch to the point that her head was leaned right in under my nose making me pull back a little.

What's up with her today?

I cleared my throat, which I swear to God was the worst move as it made her snap her head up to meet my gaze but instead ended up with her head hitting me square on the nose.

"Fuck!" I cursed before quickly cupping my nose with both my hands.

"Chill it's fine." Was all I heard making me almost glare at her.

"Excuse me?" I said kinda annoyed.

Is it just me who thinks that I'm the one hurt here, again?

She just patted on her head from where she hit me with her eyes closed and said. "I'm fine. It didn't hurt me--."

Of course, it didn't hurt you!

I just feel like someone threw a truck on my nose!

Exaggeration on peak but whatever.

"Shit!" Her eyes widened as realization hit her that's it's not about the head but the nose.

"I'm so sorryyyy!" she said all panicking.

"It's fi--" Before I could complete my words tiny hands pushed me down on the bed making me sit as she slowly leaned forward filling me with her lavender and coco like chocolatey smell.

"Lemme see!" This time I didn't say anything as I couldn't help but admire her from the closeup view I was being provided with. I didn't even know for how long we were in that position until.

"Boop!" My eyes widened before my brows formed a frown. Wait what?

What just happened again?

"Boop!" This time I was fast enough to catch what she was doing making me roll my eyes.

"Seriously, Wife?" I asked. She just shrugged.

"What? I'm just testing!" She replied before again pressing her master finger on the tip of my nose.

"Boop!"

"Ohkay stop." I said before grabbing her tiny hand in my big one.

"Areh lemme check at least--"

"Nah I'm good," I said, before getting up. To my surprise, she didn't leave my hand as she simply held on to me looking at me with her big eyes and sighed.

"Let's have breakfast together, please."

Oh no...

"I even made your favourite blueberry pancakes today!"

How could you deny to those eyes!

No. Was all I wanted to say but--

"Okay." That was the only word that came out of my mouth.

"Yeeks!" A small smile escaped my lips as I saw her jump before she quickly stood on her toes kissing me on the cheeks making me clench my jaw.

It was a torture to not take her right then and there. Pure torture.

Her hand tightened around mine as she dragged me with her towards the stairs only to come to an abrupt stop.

"Oh!" She said as if remembering something.

"You got a courier! Umm actually it's this pretty enve--- wait you go down I'll get it."

Was all she said before pulling away and running to her bedroom. I bit the corner of my mouth before shaking my head and ascending down the stairs. I stood near the dining as I smiled at how she had already set the table before opening my blazer and keeping it aside. She knew I wouldn't deny, didn't she?

Damn her.

"Here!" Tearing my eyes away from the delicious breakfast in front of me I landed them on my wife and smiled before taking the envelope from her hand only to find my world crash down at the words written on it.

To: 'Kabir'

Fuck my life.

All of a sudden all the fun drained from my face. She looked at me with those questioning eyes while all I could do was ask.

"When did you receive this?"

"Uh, yesterday?"

"Time?"

"When I came from the office umm evening?"

"Why didn't you give this to me earlier?"

"You're never home, Nur---"

"Who gave it to you?"

"I saw someone give it to the guards while I was coming back from the office and I asked them to give it to me---"

"You don't do that, Raqeeba!"

"Oh well, I did. What's the iss--"

"Forget it." With that said I quickly grabbed my coat in one hand and tightened my grip on the envelope before turning around and heading towards the door.

"Wh--wait! Nuraan!"

Of course, I wanted to stop but nothing bet the boiling sensation that rushed through me as I simply disregarded her words and fastened my footsteps towards the door. My hand reached forward for the doorknob and just as I opened the door a hand bet me to it grabbing my arm and stopping me in my position.

I clenched my jaw the moment my eyes met those doe-like grey orbs making my insides melt. She had so many questions all written over her face but the only thing that came out of her mouth was a sigh as she said.

"I'm sorry."

You shouldn't be.

I thought but instead said, "It's fine."

I was about to leave again only to have her tighten her hold on my arm before she quickly stood on her toes and placed a soft yet long kiss on the corner of my lips, making my head and heart go insane at the proximity. At that moment all I wanted was to push her right against the door and kiss her senseless but the sane part of me kicked in, stopping me from doing something I'm not supposed to.

I'm so sorry, Wife.

. . .

2 Days Ago

To the world, I was a man of power. A man who shouldn't be afraid of anything that stood in front of him and let's face it. I thought the same about myself too.

Until today.

They are wrong when they think that the man who has it all is the one who is the most powerful among all. They are wrong when they think that you can be the most dangerous when you have the wealth to buy the world. They are wrong.

For the most powerful among all is the one who has nothing to lose and nothing to choose from.

While the weakest is the one who comes with that one possession in his heart...love.

Not only for yourself but also that one other person who managed to sneak through the chambers of your heart and build a home inside like it's their own.

I clenched my jaw as I yet again looked through those pictures.

Why?

-Future is, what history did to you-

Future is what history did to you.
Future is what history did to you.
Future is what history did to you.

History...

That's right.

"Maa." It's been Eighteen years since I last said that word. Eighteen years since I last saw that face. Eighteen years since I last felt that soft motherly touch. Eighteen years since I heard that voice and yet everything feels like yesterday.

Like it's just yesterday when I lost her. Her pale body damped in the pool of blood. Her teary eyes that looked back at me with a smile plastered on her lips and a promise from the heart.

A promise to never look back.

"Maa," I said again and this time a tear escaped my eyes.

-Your closeness determines the life span of your beloved.-

"Why me, Maa?" I swallowed the lump at the back of my throat.

"You always told me to never look back. And that's what I did. I tried my best to not let my past affect me. I moved on, opened my heart to love and kindness, just the way you taught, but then the girl I put my faith in, betrayed me, made fun of my feelings and most of all... She made me realize that I was born with a curse indeed. Everyone I loved would either betray and leave me like Anusha or I'd ruin them myself. Just like I ruined you...my family."

I didn't realize how I was already knelt down in front of the placid white marble which had the words Naomica Malik engraved on it with dates. I hate graveyards but I can't deny that I get the most peace here itself. After all, it's the closest I can afford to get to my mother.

"She's too good for me Maa. I can't afford to hurt her, hell I wouldn't be able to look at myself in the eyes if anything happened to her because of me and my psychotic brother. I don't even know why he is coming back. It's a clear message he sent there. He seems to be all over her and that thought scares me. I know I'm a grown-up man but... I feel like I'm still A 10-year-old who hid away from him. I can't fuckin seem to forget those days. I try. I really do. But I can't. He wanted you to disown me, didn't he? And you didn't. Eighteen years back, the only reason he was able to find you was because you came to me. I am the reason you aren't here with me anymore, Maa. I am the reason."

It's been a while since I had done this. Letting it out, not fully but just enough.

"I think it's better if she stays away from me. Way better than staying with me."

. . .

Present Day

Shutting the car door just as I got out I quickly threw the keys to Gilbert before getting inside the house.

My footsteps, fast as I loosened my tie on the way to the staircase only to be stopped, making me sigh.

"Yes, Juliette," I said in a tired voice.

These few days have been too hectic for my liking I must say.

"Don't Juliette me, Mister. Instead, tell me about your plans for tomorrow." She replied making me frown.

"Plans?"

She gasped dramatically.

"You don't remember??" My frown deepened.

"More like I don't know..." She just shook her head.

"It's your Wife's birthday tomorrow, Nuraan Khan."

My eyes widened at her words as a small smile plastered on my face.

"Is it?" I asked to which she rolled her eyes.

"Yes. Now thank me later."

I chuckled before shaking my head. "I have to do something... What's the date though. I completely lost the track of it."

She waved smiling.

"It's on 12th May---" Her words stopped while I froze. completely.

Oh.

So it's the 11th today...

How could I...

I didn't bother saying anything as I slowly turned away and started climbing up the stairs. Today was the day that took everything away from me. That took away my childhood and the biggest part of me. How could I not remember? Anger and grief rushed through my veins. Like a cloud of heavy rain was poured right on my head making me clench my jaw.

"Nuraan." I stopped at Juliette's voice but didn't bother turning around.

"I know you lost someone very important to you on this day..."

My heart thumped at her words.

"But remember hon... When someone leaves, it's because someone else is about to arrive."

I gulped at those words.

"And for you... The arrival has already come."

__________________

I've never asked you guys for not commenting about any issue you feel in the book but today ima ask for somethin guys....

Childhood trauma is traumatic doesn't matter if it's from a girl's side or a boy's.

Suffering is suffering. And it cannot be generalised on the basis of gender or anything like that.

I'm sorry but I will not appreciate if you go around telling me that Nuraan is a man and he gotta grow up and be strong like every other ideal manly lead.

No. As much as I love authoritative men who fear nothing at all whatsoever. He's not one of them. Not yet.

There's a reason why we call it 'character development' y'know.

He's scared and he fears loss.
He is still afraid of his past repeating itself and it's perfectly normal.

I know none of my readers would think anything close to it (i mean look at you peeps! You're Soo understanding!) but anyway I just wanted to give some unnecessary lectures coz I find it cool lol.

Till then byeee!
Oh and! Not much Raqeeba in this huh...
Hehe

Did you expect this tho?

Lol
Love you all!

XOXO
It's Sheewholoved!

____________________