Loving and fighting. Accusing, denying
I can't imagine a world with you gone
The joy and the chaos, the demons we're made of.
I'd be so lost if you left me alone

.....

....

<<raqeeba's p.o.v>>

"I guess honestly is all I need then."

His words bought a sudden tinch to my heart. For some reasons I felt a sudden feeling of wanting to know more about him. His words didn't come with that always-on point mocking or sarcasm, it seemed genuine. Very genuine. I smiled at him and raised my glass.

"To your honest Wife," I said in a playful tone trying to lessen a tension I saw coming up. He just chuckled before picking his own.

"To my irritatingly honest Wife." I rolled my eyes stuck my tongue out at him before resuming my eating session but this time with a smile on my face.

"Sushi" he said.

"Huh?" I frowned at him in confusion.

"Sushi, that's my favorite food." I smiled at the fact that he actually did tell me his favorite dish, but soon grimaced at his choice of favorite dish.

"Ish. I don't like it." I said with a scowl.

"Why not?" I just shrugged at his question before saying

"First I HATE seafoods unless it is prawn. Second, Sushi! Like seriously? I don't get the psychic behind liking an almost uncooked food ugh! You know what!? I once saw this episode in TLC where the guy made Sushi from sunlight and literally had nothing in it. Ugh! I almost vomited watching it. More over I have these allergic reactions to some fishes as well. Thank God because I HATE them! Once there was a time when I was a kid and I had this fish and the skeleton got stuck in my throat and believe me or not! I went to seven doctors, to get that thing out! You could say my experience with fishes have never been good. Like ever! Moreover I can't even eat properly cooked fishes forget about the 'half cooked' one." I finished with a horrified expression and a scowl. He just kept looking at me stunned before saying

"First. It's not uncooked. Second. I feel sorry for the tiny you. Third. Remind me to NEVER ask you a question again.  I just gaped at him and gave him the finger with a smile.

"Let's play 20 questions, what say?" I said after a small silent time.

"Hasn't anyone told you that it's bad manners to talk while eating."

I rolled my eyes "And hasn't anyone told you that you don't answer a question with a question?" He looked at me straight in the eyes before saying.

"You first." I beamed at him.

"Alright! Cats or Dogs?"

"Dogs anytime." He said making me smile. "Me too! Your turn" he paused for a while thinking, "Your pet peeves?" He took a sip of his wine, his eyes not leaving mine. I bit on my lower lip before saying "Blood and Lizards." He nodded slowly.

"Your favorite old classic song?"

"Can't help falling in love" I smiled at the mention of it. "Oh I love it too!"

"Your favorite book?" He asked making me jump "Oh I like a lot of them! I am a die-hard Sidney Sheldon and Murakami fan. But talking about books apart from their's I'm a sucker for the Divergent series! Also when I was a kid I was Gaga over Twilight moreover Edward Cullen. And if we talk about Indian Authors, has to be Arundhati Roy but still my favorite book would be Till the last breath by Durjoy Datta! Godd you should definitely try it!" I saw him pass a small smile at me "You're a sucker for books aren't you?" I gave him my Cheshire cat smile before saying. "You bet."

"The age at which you lost your virginity?" I asked. His eyebrows shot up. "That escalated quick." He said to which I shrugged. "I'm straightforward." He chuckled before scratching the back of his neck "12 or 13 I guess" I let out a teasing whistle "Oohlaalaa." He chuckled before asking

"You?"

With that I felt my smile drop. Memories of that terrible night came rushing down my mind and I felt a lump form at the back of my throat.

"I'm sorry but pass. You can ask me anything else." This time he gave me a teasing smile.

"Not happening Wife. Don't worry you can trust me"

Do I? Do I trust him enough to tell him the truth? I just know him for a day. I know that being my husband he deserves to know stuffs but am I courageous enough to tell him. Tell him that my childhood was not exactly the best thing in my life. Tell him that I am not a virgin but I didn't exactly lose it to someone I trusted, someone I knew. Tell him that it wasn't something I wanted. Tell him how a six-year-old me was raped.

"6" I say as I see his smile drop and a frown take over.

No I can't.

"Or 4, or 8 or 13 or 18 or for the record yesterday. You never know." I finished with a playful wink making him roll his eyes, I felt tears threatening to leave my eyes but I tried to stay collected and smiled

No tears Raqeeba!

"Fine. You're a cheat." He said

"Hey! I do let you ask another!" I defended

"Alright. What are your thoughts about...cheating?" He moved uncomfortably as he asked me that. I frowned.

"Cheating." I tested the words on my lips and made a grimaced expression before shaking my head in disgrace.

"I find cheating so not justified. It sucks actually.... Breaking someone's trust, building something without honesty and worst of all... Living with it. As in how can you do that. How can you live without a code of conduct, without any morals or ethics that is unless it's a toxic forced relationship where in your partner is you know those psychic druggie or alcoholic." He didn't say anything and just kept looking at me

"We aren't that different are we?" I was caught off guard by his question but smiled "Maybe not." With that silence filled us.

It was when I was eating that my ears perked to the music playing in the background, it wasn't the soft type they play in restaurants it was more into the high beats type. I looked at him. "Where's the music coming from?" I asked with still some food in my mouth. Who cares. He stopped eating, took the napkin on the table and softly wiped his mouth before saying. "Dugg out has small cabin-like rooms where we eat but when you walk out you'll see the Disco thing" he said pointing at the door of our cabin.
"But I didn't see in on our way."

"It starts at 4"

"Ohh. We'll go there."

"No."

"Whyy?" I whined. I remember once how, Anusha had to cancel our outing because well... 'My boyfriend loves to go all Disco disco.' Anusha's words not mine.

Well maybe he doesn't wants to go with you.

My conscience mocked. I saw him sigh before he said. "I don't do disco, Wife."

I frowned. "You know you don't have to lie, right?" I said to which he frowned "Why do you think I am?" I rolled my eyes.

"Because according to my sources you clearly do enjoy doing it and maybe it's just because of me you're not---"

"Don't flatter yourself. I was never the Disco type. Who's your 'sources' anyway?" With that without thinking I blurted out

"Anusha" I felt him visibly stiffen making my eyes widened and mentally slap myself. I just have to spoil stuffs. "Oh" he said softly.

I looked down at my finished food. Shit shit shit shit shit! Ugh! "What did she tell you exactly?" My head snapped in his direction as I heard him say.

"Oh...umm... That... Her boyfriend loves to go all Disco disco." His jaw and fist clenched and I could feel him go white.

"Doesn't mean it was me now, does it." He said his jaw still clenched but he lightly ended with an insolent chuckle.

"Oh well it was hardly few months back so that would definitely be you unless she was chea---" i immediately slapped my palm on my mouth to stop anymore further damage. Oh god! KILL ME.

"I'm so sorry..." I apologized. "I really really am--" he cut me in

"It's alright."

I Know I shouldn't be so judgemental oh god! But... Is it true... No! Of course not! They had it for three years!

Exactly they had it for three fucking years. Maybe she got bored.

What? Yeah but wasn't she crying in the wedding? Of course, she loves him.

Great. Now I feel like a bitch.

There was silence for what seemed like an eternity. With none of us saying a word.

"We should go." I said

"Huh?" He asked confused

"The Disco."

"I thought we talked this out." He rolled his eyes at me but this time my hand reached out for his on the table.

"Please. You'll be leaving today. Let's make some memories before you forget me completely." Even though at that moment I wanted to be dramatic with puppy dog eyes but the words and the emotions came out naturally and to my surprise I sensed something. Something I never thought I would. I knew I meant every word I said. I knew that now I am afraid. Afraid that what I felt would leave me in deep shit.

"I could never forget you, Wife."

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Marry Christmas Guys!!!

It's a double update!!!
#ChristmasSpecial

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Enjoy and have a lot of fun!

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