I don show oo🤭❤️

Okay, who's ready to see our Hassana again??? Tbh, I missed that girl. Oh well😢

Umm... I don't actually have strength oo. For A/N, I'm tired asf soooooooooo.... Enjoy this chapter ❤️❤️❤️

Song for the chapter is 'Dusk Till Dawn' by Zayn Malik and Sia ❤️❤️

~GIWA~

"Hassana was found in a hotel room, lying unconscious in a pool of her own vomit. She had refused to respond since then and they just rushed her to the emergency ward in the Town Hospital. That's exactly were we're going now, Giwa."

I felt my heart drop painfully. Very painfully. Yet afterwards, it felt numb. I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. The shock wouldn't let me.

Mum started driving, not even giving me a chance to say anything. The road was clear and void of traffic, dark as it was night time, and the only source of light we had were the headlights from Mum's car.

We all stared silently into the lonely roads as Mum drove, eyes fixed on the road, unmoving. We were in silence in the car, completely utter silence, the only thing that could be heard was the sound of the engine of the car. Neither of us said a word.

Hassana..?

My.. Hassana?

In a pool of vomit..?

Unconscious..?

Not responding..?

Emergency ward..?

It seemed unreal. It felt like I was in a bad dream. Is it Hassana Alfa we're talking about? As in, my friend, Hassana?? I just cannot understand this.

I was scared. More scared than I have ever been about anything in my entire life. I couldn't even breathe properly. My lungs felt choked up. Blocked. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't think at all.

What if.. What if Hassana doesn't respond?

What if she never wakes up?

Chills ran through my body, shuddering at the possibility. I began to rebuke it. I had never been a prayer warrior, but I found myself, uttering silent prayers to God, begging him to spare Hassana. Pleading with him not to allow her to die.

I muttered my prayer out loud, putting my all into it, holding my body, trying to control the tears that were suddenly pouring out as I prayed. With every fiber of my being.

"Lord, please. Please, let Hassana live. Let Hassana live." I kept saying, praying intently.

I heard Nini in the back seat, doing the same thing, praying too with me. Mum too, did the same thing. She was praying too, for Hassana, even while on the staring. She was praying with us too.

We were at this for about a minute or two, pouring out our hearts to God. Suddenly, mum's phone started ringing. I picked up the phone from where it lay by her seat to see the caller ID - a strange number, but Mum immediately snatched it from my hand and was quick to pick up the call.

"Hello?" She spoke over the phone. "Yeah, we're on our way, what happened?"

I instantly knew it was something that gad to do with Hassana and my heartbeat suddenly became erratic. I watched closely at mum's tensed look as she answered the call and I wanted to pass out, the fear in me was too much to handle.

I almost lost my shit when Mum suddenly stopped driving, let out a small gasp and pulled over to the side and packed the car there to listen closely over the phone with a look on her face that was hard to comprehend.

She was saying absolutely nothing, but just listening to the person over the phone and I could only get if it was good news or bad news from her facial expressions. Although, it was hard to understand, I watched closely and was able to grasp how she changed up from tension to shock and then to worry. I got even more tensed, unable to exactly figure her out, unable to understand what exactly was going on.

She was finally done with the call and she stayed quiet, looking straight ahead for the count of five seconds.

"M-Mum, what happened...?" I asked her, but she remained silent, looking at the wind shield with an impassive expression on her face.

"Mum.." I whispered, starting to lose my shit, teas already streaming down my face as I was already losing every hope I had left.

"Mum, is she...." My whisper voice broke painfully and I had to breath to get myself together.

"Mum.. Is..Is Hassana..dead?" I fought my voice to ask.

That was when she turned to look at me. A tensed up Nini pulled herself forward to rest herself on the back of my seat amd get a better view of me and my mum.

Mum took a deep breath and I held my breath, waiting for her to shatter me.

"Hassana is alive, Giwa." She finally said.

I felt an entire weight being lifted off me on hearing that. However, Mum didn't look too pleased for some reason and I wondered why, wondering if it was something I should worry about.

"Mum, is-is something wrong?" Nini was the one who asked, a small tiny voice left her as she was basically taking the words right out of my mouth.

"Yes." She said, surprisingly looking at me and only me and I got confused.

"I actually was speaking to the doctor." She was still looking at my face.

"Umm.. okay?" I was confused at where she was heading and what it had to do with me.

"She was placed on an oxygen mask and she picked up a few minutes ago." Mum continued.

"Is she in a coma?" I asked immediately.

Mum shook her head. "She's awake. Completely awake."

A sigh of relief left me that instant. God Thankyou!

"Although, something he told me bothered me. What caused her condition." She said to me.

"What?" I asked her, my tension suddenly rising again.

"Attempted suicide." Mum answered me.

My eyes grew wide and my mouth dropped, shocked by what I was being told.

Wait, what? Suicide!?

"Giwa, Hassana took in a large dose of rodenticide and the doctor said it could not have been a mistake. That large amount she took could not have been couincidental." She told me.

Rodenticide!?

Rat poison!? Hassana took rat poison!?? What the fuck!!

"Hassana would have been dead by now if she wasn't found in that hotel room early enough. In fact, the fact that she even picked up right now is a pure miracle." She told me.

Jesus Christ..

How could Hassana make up her mind to take her own life? With a rodenticide for that matter! This was a clear, deliberate attack on herself. She knew the implications and didn't mind. She already made up her mind on leaving this world?? Was that what she had been up to all these while? Thinking of ways to take her own life??? Jesus Christ, Hassana!

"Giwa, why would your friend want to take her own life?" Mum asked me, still shocked.

In all honesty..

I wasn't even sure. If it was her aunt or something else... Or if it was even me?

"..On her birthday?" Nini's voice came in.

We, Mum and I, turned to look at her. She stared at us, moping innocently, traces of shock and fear lingering in her pupils.

"Today is Hassana's birthday.." Nini reminded us.

That was true. 2nd April.

"She wanted to commit suicide on her birthday?" She asked us.

We didn't even have a reply for Nini. We were still all in a daze, shocked beyond words to even comprehend the matter and come up with a reasonable explanation for things.

"Is there something I should know, Giwa?" Mum asked, turning to me once again.

"Was she going through anything? Anything at all? Is it something that needs therapy? Is it something we can help her with??" Mum kept asking me.

"M-Mum... Let's.. let's go and see Hassana first, please." I told her, already foreseeing how long a conversation this was going to be.

"We'll talk about everything at home." I promised her and with a sigh, she started the car again and we were soon back on the road, heading to the hospital to see Hassana.

We drove in through the black gates of Town Hospital, smoothly moving through stoney grounds, and in no time, we were settles in the parking lot.

I stared at the hospital building as Mum had turned off the car engine. It was a big building, I guessed white in colour, that was an easy colour to tell in the dark, especially when all the street lights in the compound, and around were illuminating around the place, giving us a good source of light.

"Let's go." Mum said to us as soon as we had sat quietly in that car for a while.

We obliged. We got our of the car and shut the doors, making our way into the hospital. We walked quietly, carefully, heading straight to the entrance door we could see at the centre of the building.

We first got into the reception, a white painted average sized room with large counter and arranged metal benches at the corners. Mum walked faster, straight to the counter and we walked right behind her, trying to catch up.

"Good evening. I'm Mrs. Falade. I'm here to see Hassana Alfa. She was admitted into the emergency room not long ago." Mum told the light skinned lady, just one of the ladies who actually stood there, behind the black and white oil-painted counter.

The particular light skinned lady who had on a blue top looked up at my mum, respectfully acknowledging her.

"Are you a family member?" She asked my mum, diverting dark brown eyes from mum to a group of files packed up and arranged by the lady by her, promptly picking up one of them, a blue file, to go through it.

"Not exactly.." Mum had answered and the lady paused with the file, halfly opened in her hands, squinting at my mum and tilting her head a bit.

"I already talked about this with the doctor. I'm filling in as a mother to her. They had called me up earlier after going through her phone and realising she saved me as 'Mum', so apparently, I'm acting as one for her now. She's always been like daughter to me." Mum explained.

The lady smiled at my mum, understanding what she was saying.

"Alright, then." She said to my mum. "Umm.. looks like the doctor knows you're here. He's right here now... Behind you."

We all turned back to see a dark skinned man on glasses walking in through the hallways that looked like it led to the rest of the hospital. He looked a little above 50 - I judged through the small white hairs I could spot on his head and on his beard as well, and he was dressed in a blue shirt and regular black trousers, but covered up in a white lab coat. I instantly figured he was the doctor.

"Doctor Clem?" My mum asked, leaving us again and walking towards the doctor.

The doctor smiled, realising who she was instantly. "Mrs. Falade?"

We walked right behind mum and we were soon in front of the doctor. We already seemed all tensed up and yet, he seemed calmer, almost happy for us, trying to calm us down with his hands.

"How is she, doctor?" My mum was quick to ask.

"She's really doing better than expected. It's almost unreal." He was telling us.

"Can we see her, please?" I spoke up.

The doctor turned to look at me, dark brown eyes peered at me through thick frames.

"My daughters.." Mum introduced us.

"Giwa.." She gestured to me and I greeted, "Good evening." He responded gently, nodding.

"Niniola.." Mum gestured to Nini, holding her closer and Nini also greeted him, shyly and he equally responded.

The doctor smiled at all of us.

"Giwa is best friends with Hassana. She's been very worried." Mum told him.

"No need to be, Giwa." The doctor said to me, warming me with a smile. He summoned us with his hands, "Come with me. I'll take you to Hassana's ward."

We were quick to jump at that, not even wasting time in following the man as he walked in through the door way he had come out from, leading us through a white painted hallway with series of shut rooms with numbers on the doors. I figured they were other wards.

We got into an elevator soon and it took us to an entirely new floor that had it's walls painted yellow and not white, like the floor we were on previously. Together, we all followed him, passing through a place that looked like another reception - with black oil-painted counters this time, and same iron benches I had seen in the other floors. A barrage of nurses around there, kept greeting the doctor as we walked past. We had taken us a few steps into the hallway that reception led to, when we finally met our stop.

..In front of one of the rooms there, the one by the right end, with the number "45" boldly inscripted on the black door of the room.

"That's Hassana's room." I said softly, almost sounding questioning.

Doctor Clem looked at me, smiled and nodded, before proceeding to open the door for us to come in.

We walked into the ward, a yellow painted spacey room with who tiles to be first greeted by the nurses, about two of them, one of them holding up a tray - I could see some needles and a small bottle of liquid on it - and the other nurse, was already by the bed side attending to...

.. Hassana.

I momentarily froze, like actually stilled for about a second or two, when I saw her - Hassana, lying there, lazily on the hospital bed, clothed in a white hospital gown, hand somewhat outstretched to the nurse who held it gently, doing something to her drip.

As soon as one of the nurses had greeted us, Hassana's head turned slightly to meet us standing there.

I noticed her eyes.. how bloodshot red they looked. How darkened and stressed her undereyes looked, her lips, they looked paler too and less full. I don't even know if it was me, but she looked skinnier. Like she hadn't eaten for days. She literally looked like life had been sucked out of her. Drained out of her.

I was destroyed seeing her this way. I nearly broke down in tears. God, Hassana, what did you do to yourself!

When her face had broken into a weak smile at us, at me, the veins on her forehead became visible and the skin on her face looked like it would break.. it hurt to even watch her smile. Like you could feel the pain - both the pain caused physically by the overstretching of the weak muscles of her face and the deep, dull pain that was there in her heart.

She couldn't stop smiling at me. I smiled back, happy she was smiling, but at the same time, shattered to see her in this state. She didn't look like Hassana. Not the Hassana I knew.

"Why are you crying, Giwa?" Her weak, almost unheard voice asked me. That smile, never leaving her face.

Am I?

"Giwa..." She called, but I rushed over to her before she could say more, sat on the edge of the bed and leaned my body to where she lay to gently hug her, crying softly. I felt her hands on my back, holding me as I cried on her.

I don't know how long we stayed like this, but I heard the doctor talking to my mum. I didn't bother to listen to what they were saying. I just didn't want to leave Hassana.

"Giwa.."

A voice that wasn't Hassana had called me.

Leave me alone. Just leave me alone.

"Giwa.."

Leave me, please.

"Giwa.."

"Leave me alone!" I voiced out, holding on to Hassana, refusing to leave her alone.

It didn't take too long after for me to feel hands on me, gentle hands that made me know it was my mother.

"Giwa.. the nurses will have to attend to her for a while. Let's wait outside, please." She was saying to me.

I wasn't sure how it happened, but all I remember was crying and holding Hassana, stubbornly refusing to let go and the next thing, I saw myself outside, in the reception there, crying and holding on to my mum instead.

I really don't understand how it happened, but all that was on my mind was Hassana's state. How different she looked when I saw her. How physically drained and worn out she looked. It killed me. It shattered me. It messed up my brain, not even allowing me to think straight about anything else.

Mum was called in first to talk to her and while Nini troded in with her, I sat on the bench alone, taking my time, waiting for my turn, meaning to speak to Hassana alone.

Soon, it was my turn to privately see her and I didn't waste time, nearly jumped out of my seat and rushed back into Hassana's ward. Funny how I didn't even need help finding it. I had subconsciously mastered the direction.

I slowly opened the door to her ward, gently closing the door behind me as I watched her watch me. Unlike before, she was actually sitting up now, with her back resting against the wall of the long, strong head board of the bed.

She smiled again at me, that same weak smile that destroyed me and outstretched her arms towards me, for a hug. I ran towards her, sitting with her on the bed, losing control of myself once again and hugging her closely, gently, not wanting to hurt her already seemingly hurt body.

"Hassana, why did you do this to yourself. Why?" I kept asking her as I held her, tears blurring my eyes.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." She kept saying back, with that weak voice of hers as she held me back, softly crying on my shoulders too.

We stayed that way, Me and Hassana, hugging each other, crying with each other, trying our bests to heal each other.

Suddenly, Hassana had pulled out of the hug, blinking to stop her tears and quickly wiped off her tears. She started to wipe the tears on my face, eagerly, desperate, trying to stop them as they poured out uncontrollably.

"Stop, okay? Stop crying, love. I'm okay. I will be okay. Giwa, stop crying please." She was saying to me, cleaning off my tears.

I tried to stop crying, just to do anything that would make her happy. Anything that would make her happy. Even if it meant me holding back my tears. But it was hard. It was hard not to cry.

"Look at me, Giwa. Look at me. I'm right here. Nothing happened to me. I'm right here. I'm fine." She kept telling me, making me to look into her eyes, into her blood shut eyes and darkened eye bags. Those destroyed me even more.

"Oh, c'mon, Giwa!" She whined when I kept crying. She started to get mote serious, wiping away my tears, holding my face and whispering calming words, funny words, silly words.. doing whatever she could to uplift my mood.

"Crying too much isn't good for your mental health." She said.

"Big girls don't cry, Giwa." She said.

"Giwa, you're a strong girl, aren't you?" She also said.

"I'm trying. I'm trying." I cried out to her. Nothing seemed to be working.

"We almost lost you, Hassana. We would have lost you!" I kept saying.

"But, you didn't!" She said to me. "I'm here, right? I'm not going anywhere. The doctor said I'm going to be fine. I know I'm going to be fine, okay? Don't cry anymore. Don't cry."

I nodded, trying to stop crying as she said, trying to listen to her. It took some time, but I did it. I did it.. I stopped crying. I started taking in breaths to calm myself down and she smiled at me, satisfied, happy. I smiled back, happy that she was happy. Happy I was finally able to control myself.

She looked at me for a while, smiling, playfully-mockingly, teasingly, wriggling her eyebrows and trying to make me laugh, trying to be herself again. The Hassana I know. The playful, happy one.

"Baby Giwa. Baby Giwa.." she started to sing for me, with a horrible, off-key voice she used to mess a lot of songs up. What she was doing proved effective. I actually laughed. At her. At myself. Anf she laughed too, weakly, not her usual high pitched hysteric laughter. One that sounded like she didn't want to hurt something by laughing too hard. It hurt me that she was in pain.. but atleast she seemed happy. I guess?

"I'm surprised you came.." Hassana told me softly.

"Why wouldn't I?" I replied.

.. Just because of one silly thing she did?

If my friends and Ivandor could be there for me even after my big mess up, why couldn't I be here for Hassana too?

"I shouldn't have, Giwa. I shouldn't have sent him that text. That was so stupid." She was saying, shocking me with a sudden bitterness as she reprimanded herself. It actually shocked me. That is, seeing her so angry... Angry with herself.

"Hassana, it's okay. It is, really." I assured her, but she adamantly kept shaking her head, opposing blatantly.

"No, it's not, Giwa. What I did wasn't okay and never will be." She kept saying.

As much as I had no negative feelimgs against her, I had half a mind to ask her why. Why she did it..... But I didn't.

"Giwa, nothing will ever be able to justify what I did. You.. you have always been a good friend... to me, at least.. and that's why I always supported you in everything..."

Good friend...?

Me..? Had I really been a 'good friend' to Hassana? Had I?

"No.." I shook my head, answering the question I had just asked in my head. She paused, looked at me a certain way.

I couldn't say I was. I tossed her aside after one mistake and meanwhile, I had made many in the past that she had always overlooked.

Needless to say, I had been a bitch in the past - to Hassana, to even the rest of my friends. Yet, Hassana was the only one who stood by all the time, amidst all my bullshit.

She had always been the light in our friendship. The one who always made everyone else happy, gave every one a reason to laugh or smile, even when that energy was never reciprocated to her.

Needless to say, Hassana was always there... For me, at least. She always made me feel like I wasn't alone. Like I shouldn't ever be alone. She made me feel good about myself. I wasn't perfect, yet she made me feel like I was.

Right from the very first day we had met...

I had always been that girl in the set that everyone was terrified of. The one everyone was scared to talk to. Until now, I had always loved that stupid feeling.. of being feared by others. As much as I hated to admit it then, I actually felt a bit lonely... A bit sad.

Until one faithful day, roughly around the beginning of Jss3, Hassana talked to me. She actually had the guts to approach me. In a way, it made me feel warm.... Again as much as I hated to admit then, I felt accepted. Loved. Not judged.

I never really fancied her before. Before that time she spoke to me, she had still been always vibrant, waving to me whenever she saw me and I always ignored her.

Hassana wasn't ever one to have a stable clique at that time. First, it was a group of girls who used to dance in the set. Of course, as a terrible dancer she was the outcast. She moved on to the Christian group. Even tried joining the sporty girls of the set. Woeful fail. Before she found me, she was clinging onto the princesses of our set that year - Kelechi Uwa and Haliya Sanusi.

When Haliya left to a different school, Trinity Academy, in that Jss3, Kelechi was less open to Hassana and well, she became lonely again. One sports day, Hassana found me alone and tried making friends with me.

She had exuded so much enthusiasm. It warmed me. But then, I quickly hated the feeling and I quickly blew her off. Quite rudely. However, she never left me alone. She didn't stop coming back. No matter how rude I was to her, she never got offended, never stopped smiling, never stopped trying to get to me with her brightness.

Had I known that the poor girl was just lonely...

.. desperately looking for anyone that would give her attention. Anyone that would distract her from the hell of a life she was living....

Maybe that was why she never got offended. She was desperate. Desperate for love. Desperate for the attention. Desperate to have all the energy she gave to people reciprocated back for her..

Even if no one particularly gave her that attention, she never stopped being there. I don't know about others, but Hassana had tried for me.

Starting off by easily stealing my heart. When I thought I was alone, she found me... In my dark, twisted maze. She was always there... Always.

When everyone else left my side when I was being a bitch, she stayed..

I recalled the little ones, big ones. When I had those awful cramps on Interhouse Sports and she offered to do everything to make me feel better

When I first started having those problems with Ivan - when I thought he was ignoring me and I overreacted with things and my other friends were thinking the worst of me - which they had the right to, Hassana stayed.

I remembered that video she even sent one of those nights, the one with the Snapchat filter that had me laughing my ass off right after I had previously been crying my eyes out.

Did that make you laugh? She had texted me.

It had. It had really made me laugh. The video of herself she had sent me. It made me feel a whole lot better.

Sarcastically, I had replied, "No, send me another one." And she did. She took her time, making videos and sending. I had woken up the next morning to see a dozen of them.

And then, the Dynamis - only Hassana came with me. For me. Only Hassana. She was there.

Yet, I had still ignored her semi-break down that night. I hadn't asked about it the next morning when she appeared before me all jumpy and excited again.

That morning I had seen her crying in class..

I didn't even know what to say.

Hassana did so much for me. I could go onn and onn. And I was certain there was a lot more she also did for a lot of people. She was talented at picking up damsels in distress, the same way she did with me. Same way she did with Prissy. I was definitely certain she did more for us than I even knew of. More than I can even imagine.

Yet.. no one paid attention to her.

We were all too focused in our own lives to even pay attention to her. No one really paid attention to Hassana. I mean, if our lives were down as a movie or a book, she probably wouldn't even have her own point of view.... And no one would probably care to even ask why.

Come to think of it, what if that was the reason she acted up like she did? Who knows? Anger. Frustration. The same thing I had felt. The same thing that made me make a mess of my life.

As for Hassana, I couldn't know why she did what she did. Whatever pushed her to do it, I don't know. And honestly... In a way, I didn't even want to know. I didn't even care. All I wanted right now was for her to get fully better, so we could all go back to how things were. So we could start afresh with her. Look for ways to help her...

And that her heartless aunt..

I had half a mind to meet her one on one and call her out. I had half a mind to bring it up right now even, and talk to Hassana about it. To fully understand the story. To fully understand the untold mysteries behind this girl called Hassana Alfa.

... But not now...

What she needs right now isn't a reminder of her fucked up life. She needed love. The love she deserves. The love she has always deserved. The love I had failed to fully give her in the past.

I had failed... As a friend to her.

"I wasn't a good friend to you, Hassana." I admitted, lowering my head, looking down, away from her and painfully accepting that fact.

I wasn't... She couldn't say I was.. She didn't honestly believe that...

Hassana stayed quiet for an awful amount of time and I thought she was just going to agree with me. I thought she was going to say it too. That I was a bad friend.

"You weren't perfect.." she finally said.

Is anyone really?

My head went up to look at her. I watched her brown eyes closely - her brown, blood shut eyes, waiting for her to say more.

"..but, you were good, Giwa." She added. The certainty she had in her tone. It made me wonder... Why? Why? Why was she so sure I was such a good friend to her?

"Someone made me think otherwise..." She muttered, but I heard.

Someone made her think otherwise.. of me?

Who? Her aunt?

I wanted to ask. To clarify. But that tiny voice in my head came, saying to me, "Leave it, Giwa. Now, it's not the time."

For the first time in a long time, I actually listened to it.

Hassana didn't need us talking about her aunt. Not now. Not when she was in such a state.

I'd wait.. I'd wait for her to get out of here. Wait for her to get fine. Then, we could properly talk about everything.

"It wasn't their fault for having such a twisted mindset.." Hassana said, once again shocking me with the be in her tone.

Again, I asked myself;
Is she talking about her aunt?

"It was still entirely my fault.." she continued. "It was my fault for choosing to believe the crap I was being fed and it was my fault for making drastic decisions."

"I made drastic decisions too." I told her.

"It could have been avoided if not for me. You did all that because of me, Giwa. I caused all your problems." Hassana said.

"No, Hassana..." I disagreed. "I caused my problems for myself. I was the one who made the decisions I made. Now, just the same way you won't go blaming this person who pushed you into doing what you did, I will not blame you too for my mishaps."

She was quiet, clearly she understood the point.

"I just.. I don't know, Giwa. I'm sure your mum already told you what I tried to do to myself... I just..." She sighed, tired. "I felt like I shouldn't just exist anymore. With everything that had been going on.. I just.."

She paused there, her voive trailing off, like she was stopping herself from saying more. From reminding herself of something.. someone?

Her aunt?

I only wondered if this was even deeper than I thought. I wondered if Hassana wasn't just talking about us.. but also about some other things?

"But, you also thought the same thing, Giwa." Hassana said, confusing me.

"You." She said. "Didn't you also think it would be better off for everyone if I just.. I don't know? Died?" Hassana was saying.

My eyes grew wode in shock, wondering why on Earth she would actually think such a thing.

"You said it in that text. You did." Hassana was saying to me, peering at me with brown, broken eyes that shattered me.

What was she talking_

It hit me. Like a damn truck!

The day she had apologized through text for what happened.

My reply was, "Die! I hate you!!"

I actually shuddered.

She hadn't texted me back. Since that day, I hadn't heard from her or seen her in school.

Was that what she was up to? What she was doing? Did she really take me that seriously!?

"Hassana, I didn't mean that, Jesus!" I exclaimed and her eyes lit up, a glow, a sparkle flashed through.

"Y-You, you d-didn't?" She stuttered, looking unbelieving, lashes blinking at me.

I sat there in shock, watching her. Utterly speechless. Wondering why on earth she thought I would mean for her to die. Why would she take me seriously when she knew how angry I was at her that time?? Who would take that kind of thing that seriously!?

That's when my answer came.

A damaged person.

A damaged person would take that text seriously.

Hassana was damaged. Very damaged. Possibly even needing external help. I only got scared for her, wondering to myself;

Just how damaged is she?

How bad had the things in her life affected her?

Looking at Hassana now...

This leaner, weak looking Hassana, all dressed and clad in a hospital gown..

Her light skin, looking duller than I remember...

Hair, more frizzy and disorganized. Not like it would be on a regular..

Eyes, heavy, nearly swollen, tired with bags and dark undereyes..

Lips, chapped, pale, thinner....

I wasn't seeing that playful, jumpy girl I thought had no problems with life.

I was seeing a deeply shattered, damaged, lonely teenage girl, who was only looking for love and attention. Something she never was fully able to get.

My heart broke for her. Instantly, I hugged her, threw my arms around her in a gentle embrace.

"Hassana, I would never want you dead. I would never. I want you to always be here with me." I told her in our hug.

"Giwa, don't feel this was your fault," she told me back. "In all honesty... It barely really had anything to do with you."

Barely...

Barely..

That still meant in a slight way.. it was.

But then, in a bigger way, it wasn't. Got me wondering about the major reason she may have wanted to take her own life. Her Aunt? The date rapes? Were they more? I wanted to ask. My nosiness wanted to get the better of me.

Not now, Giwa. Not now.

"Hassana, look. There may be a lot I'm still yet to know about what may have gone wrong with you, but what I do know is that no matter what, you should never decide the answer is taking your own life. I have learned to stand strong even in the face of difficulties. That's the real definition of power. We don't let life trample on us and still decide to let it have it's last laugh. You cannot quit living just because something isn't right with you, that's not how it works. Fight, fight, and keep fighting. You had no right to take your own life, no matter what happened!" I told Hassana.

She nodded, whispering a little, "I know."

"Life can be a bitch." I told her.

"Yeah, no joke. If it were a person, I'd set him or her on fire." She joked, making me smile with the humor that entered her tone. Needless to say, we actually both laughed.

"Giwa.. you..you sound so..." She did a quick thinking face, trying to find the right word.

".. different." Was her choice of words in the end of her brain storm.

I shrugged, smiling wistfully. "What can I say? Your little mistake made me realise a few things. Taught me a few lessons. At the end of the day, you're the hero in my story, Hassana."

I smiled at her and she smiled right back.

"You're my hero, Hassana." I told her and we took each other in for another embrace, staying there and feeling each others' warmth and calm. I whispered her a 'happy birthday' and she giggled softly on me, appreciating.

It felt good having to talk to her again. Before we had left the hospital, Doctor Clem had told us;

"Hassana is picking up quite impressively. I have no doubt that she would pull through. We will just give her a few more days, then she can be discharged."

I smiled, satisfied with the news.

I couldn't help but think to myself. Maybe.. slowly, slowly, things were falling into place...

Right?

Right? What do you think???
Oh well, 5 chapters to go🤗❤️

My children, I wanted to write a long A/N about why you shouldn't ever think about suicide in your life, but unfortunately, strength is not in me💔💔 💔 And I'm hungry af, so it's either I get my ass up from my bed and make spaghetti by this time of the night or I go to bed hungry😩💔

I'll write the main A/N some other time definitely. I'm tired rn. School has started properly, so updates may be slower.....BUT... Another update should he coming this week, so anticipate ❤️❤️

This book will soon finish oo😢 Okay, okay, bye for now. See you this week😢❤️