______****______

"So it goes, I'm yours to keep,
And I'm yours to lose.
You know I'm not a bad girl but I do bad things with you"

______****______

Jungkook fully turns around to see you trembling. So, he hugs your shaking body due to nervousness. "Shhh. It's ok. What's happening? Nightmares," he asks you. You just shake your head and snuggles into his warmness. You're so content right now that you could cry and before you could register, you are actually crying.

Big drops of tears fall from your eyes staining your cheeks. A small and unwanted hiccup escapes your mouth, signalling Jungkook that you are crying. You tighten your hold on him, fearing that he might disappear or just reduce to shreds in seconds.

"Baby? You crying?" He asks and unwrap his arms around you. He cups the back of your head to pat it softly.

You hiccup again as more tears flow out. You don't know why you're crying but you definitely know it's not for sad reason. You're happy. So happy that you can literally die in this moment. Your heart is aching but in a good sense.

Jungkook reaches behind him to untangle your arms on his back and moves a little backward to look at you. Your head is still hanging low as two tears fall down on the floor.

"Hey...," he cups your cheeks to lift your head up. "Why are you crying?" He asks you but you're in no condition to answer.

"Ok...," he says and let go of your face to carry you up bridal style to take you to the couch in the living room. He then leaves you to come back with a glass of water.

You chug the water down and give the glass back to him. He sits down on the floor by you as you are cuddled up on the couch. You ask him to sit with him and he sits by your side in an instant.

"So what is it?" He asks you again. You look up at him through your glassy eyes and red nose, all ready to break down again. He scoots in closer to you and makes you face him fully.

"I...need to talk to you," you say and tears again form in your eyes, making you look down.

"Ok. Do it," he says and you lean towards him to put your head on his shoulder.

You sniffle before starting," I've never been loved except the time when I was with Young Chul, Eun Jae's father. I was broken when he died. I wanted to live for my son only. I...". You sniffle again and tears fall down.

"I've never wanted to meet someone else or fall in love again. I was broken to the point I thought no one could ever fix. If it wasn't for Jae, I wouldn't be alive till now. I wanted to live as a mother...for her son...," you gulp and let out a shaky breathe.

"I've never been sure about what I was doing. I was just running. Far away from this world. I don't even know if I actually loved Young Chul or he was just my way of escapism. I wanted him to be with me. I wanted him to never leave, just stay right where he was but now that I realise, I never loved loved him. I loved the feeling that he made me feel. I loved that how he had brought me out of that orphanage where I was constantly abused and raped. I guess I loved him because I felt gratitude towards him...," you lift your head from his shoulder to look at his face and he looks furious...?

"What happened?" You ask him. "What did you say about orphanage?" He asks you.

"You told me you have your ways to know all the information about me," you chuckle through your tears at the question.

"Answer me, Y/N," he demands.

"I was physically and sexually abused there. The owner raped-," he cuts you off "What happened to the owner?"

"Me and Young Chul filed a case against him and after some investigation, we kicked him inside the prison," you tell him proudly and Jungkook hugs you tightly.

"I'm proud of you, my baby," he says but one thing just keeps on bugging him. That is, in the report that Seokjin gave him about you, there was no mention of you being abused or raped or anything shady about the orphanage owner.

You giggle and break the hug. Jungkook smiles at you and say," So continue".

Your tears have dried up now and butterflies are flattering inside your stomach as you think what you're about to say next.

"So...the day I met you I kind of never knew we'd end up in this situation. I mean you wanted to kill me," you chuckle and Jungkook smiles, looking at your flushed face.

"The thing is, Jungkook, that I...I'm a mother before any of this. I'm very worried about Eun Jae. It's not like we're gonna be together for like forever or something-,"

"No, you're wrong here. I want everything with you that comes with forever and beyond. If we're gonna start this than it's not going to end ever. I intend to start my forever with you. I want you to be my forever, Y/N," he confesses, looking straight into your eyes.

"And about Eun Jae. Do you think I don't care about him? He's a part of you, from you. Fuck, he's more important than anything for me, trust me," he continues.

"I know but I don't want anything from your mafia world to affect him," you whisper, trying not to hurt him.

"I promise you Y/N. We'll bring him up like a normal child. If you want it, I'll never introduce him to my world. We're covering this up since the starting. We'll figure it out in some way," he says and grabs your hand.

"Why?" You ask him and he squints his eyes. "Why me? Why us?" You ask again.

"Because you're you. I've never met such an amazing woman like you before. You're everything I've ever wanted, Y/N. You're my safe zone. I don't know... you've had some magic spell on me ever since I first saw you. You're insanely beautiful, brave, composed and passionate. How could I ever not feel in love with you when you just exist? Like in front me," he cups both your cheeks and connect your foreheads.

"Right now, I love you the most but I also know I'm gonna love you even more tomorrow too. Even if you take eternity to just think about it, I'll still stand in front of your door every fucking night to just make you love me, make you mine, make you believe me and just make you give me every little piece of your life- happy or sad. I just love you, Y/N. I fucking. Love. You. Only you," he concludes and you didn't notice until now that you're again crying.

"I... I," you try to force out those words but they're clogged just right in your throat.

"Say it baby," he says and you part from him.

"I love you, Jungkook. I fucking love you too," you say and giggle at the end, rivers flowing out of your eyes.

You hear a little growl before he crashes his lips onto yours. It was so forceful that the sound of your teeth clashing was so clear. He kissed you softly at first but when he enters your mouth, he kisses you like it's his first time kissing you. Your lips moves in sync with his as you get lost in the euphoria of love.

He snakes his arm on your lower back and pulls you even closer to him. He then grabs you by your waist to gently make you sit on his lap in a straddling position. The close proximity is turning you on now. You moan in the kiss and he hugs you tighter. Your hands goes to hold him by his nape.

Your breathing becomes shallow and you pull a little away from his mouth to inhale handful of air. However, he's not in a mood to just stop here. Just as you pull away a little, he tugs your lower lip gently with his teeth and doesn't let you just go away now. He leans in again and starts kissing you again. You giggle at his stubbornness.

Your tongues laps on each other's to just taste more of this love. His hand goes inside your warm t shirt to caress your skin there. The moment his warm hand lands on your skin, tiny little goosebumps scatters all around your body. This feels so exciting and ecstatic. You want more. More of him. More of everything that comes with him.

You adjust yourself on his crotch and move your hip slowly. Jungkook pulls away and inhales sharply. You lay your forehead on his as you grind on him again. You're so wet that you can bet his grey sweatpants must have got a wet patch on them.

He grabs your waist to stop your moment and look right into your eyes. You detach your forehead from his and stare at him in disbelief.

"We can't do this right now, Y/N," he rasps out.

"Why? You don't want me?" You question him.

"Oh, you don't know how much I want to just fuck your brains out right now but I can't. I won't 'cause Eun Jae is sleeping in the adjoining room," he answers and puts a strand of your hair behind your ear.

"He won't wake up. I know," you argue.

"Baby, you are not at all quite when we do it. You are loud, really loud but it's a turn on, you know. You screaming my name underneath me as I ram into you, knowing that I'm the reason you're losing your senses at that time," he tilts his head to his right side with a smirk on his face. At this moment you're so wet that you can literally come with just a simple touch of his.

"Don't tell me you're not turned on too," you murmur and palm his semi erect dick.

He scoffs and say," I'm turned on everytime I see you, to be honest".

"So let me just take care of you," you rub your palm up and down.

"What? You wanna suck my dick?" He asks in surprise and you bite your lip while nodding.

"Love, as much as the thought of your mouth wrapped around my dick tempts me, I can't let you do this. I don't want Eun Jae to come and open those curtains to see his lovely sweet mother on her knees with her small mouth stuffed with his 'Kookie uncle's' dick," he chuckles and you slap his bicep playfully.

"Stop! That's dirty," you giggle.

"I know. That's why let's just sleep because you're exhausted and I'm exhausted as well," he states and you pout.

"Don't sulk," he smiles and wraps his arms around you. After pecking your lips, he picks you up as he stands up. You cling to him like some koala as he carries you to the bedroom.

Eun Jae is still fast asleep, unbeknownst to everything that happened. Jungkook lays you down on one side of the bed, beside Eun Jae.

"So, good night. I should leave," he yawns.

"What? You don't have to leave. Stay here. Sleep with us," you suggest.

He doesn't need to be told twice. He quickly takes of his big jacket to slide inside the warm blanket. Now, you are sandwiched between your son and Jungkook. Your back is towards Jungkook and you are hugging Eun Jae in your front. Jungkook also draps his arm on your waist and keep his palm flat on your stomach.

This night is perfect.

*******************
A little short chapter but wholesome? Next one's going to be a banger!

~Aster🌸