๐๐๐๐๐, past
EIGHT
flashback
t.w - abuse.
โ Cause if she doesn't do it to me, she'll do it to them โ
เฐ
MANY MANY YEARS EARLIER
in east london.
At the age of fourteen, Vanessa sat between her four younger siblings on the couch, staring up at her mother and step-father in horror. Beside her, her youngest sister, Callie, cried quietly, sniffing into her pyjama sleeves while keeping her teddy squished to her chest.
"You took him away?" Vanessa was the first to speak, surprised that the only emotion radiating from her voice was anger.
Her mother nodded her head, "We needed to, V. He's no good for this family."
Vanessa tilted her head, "James hasn't got a single bad bone in his body. I'm the one who needs to be taken away, not him,"
Her voice raised, "He's done nothing wrong! You're constantly complaining about how I'm the problem child. How I'm the one who's ruined your fucking life because you decided to have sex when you were fucking fourteen!"
Her mum, Josie, jabbed a warning finger towards her eldest daughter, "I thought I told you not to mention that in front of Cain."
Cain was her mum's boyfriend, who had only been around for three months and was already acting as if he ran the household; screaming at the children to do the smallest tasks for him because he seemed to find joy in watching them work.
"I don't give two flying fucks about Cain!" Vanessa stood up from the sofa after squeezing Callie's hand, "I know that he's the one who's convinced you to send James away. He's a fucking cunt, and you were the one to tell me that after your first fucking date! You'reโ"
"Vanessa!" Josie screeched, before diverting her gaze to her other children, "Get out, kids. Go on, go! Get out!"
None of the children moved an inch, their eyes glued to the back of their big sister.
Vanessa turned, smiling down at them as soft as she could, "I'm just talking to mum. I'll be fine."
Hesitantly, her four siblings jumped off the sofa and rushed upstairs, though Callie walked slowly, her bottom lip quivering as she peered through the doorway once last time before Nessa waved her away.
Vanessa turned back to her raging mother, throwing her arms in the air, "Go on, then. Do it. Hit me. I can tell you want to. Nothing's ever stopped you before."
"Stop fucking provoking her," Cain muttered from behind her mother.
Scoffing, Nessa pointed at her mother's curled fists, "I'm not. I'm giving her permission. 'Cause if she doesn't do it to me, she'll do it to them," She motioned towards the room above her head, where she knows her siblings are cowering, "It always used to be me or James. But, I suppose, you must have gotten bored of him."
Josie shook her head, "He threatened me! He's crazy!"
"He fucking threatened you?" Vanessa laughed in disbelief, "No, mum. He threatened to tell social services about you and your horrid fucking boyfriend! You can't just ship your own son off because he didn't love you anymore!" She yelled, her voice cracking slightly, "Fuck, I don't even know if he ever loved you at all! Every fucking night he laid in his bed, sobbing into my shoulder because you couldn't handle the reality that his dad loved his son more than you."
"I don't care about Mark," Josie grimaced, "I never did."
"Bollocks," Vanessa spat, "You fell in love with every single one of our dad's, then got your heartbroken when they fucked off. Do you wanna know why they left, mum? Because of you. Because you never knew when to shut up, or stop victimising yourself in every situation. Hell, I'm surprised you even managed to get them into bed in the first place!"
A fist slammed against her cheek, the multiple cheap rings on the fingers creating cuts along her flesh. Before she had time to straighten up once more, another hit slammed directly across her eye, a sharp metal ring slicing away the flesh below her eyebrow. Vanessa let out a pained yell, managing to grab her mother's fist before it slamming into her temple.
She groaned, motioning to the blood running down her face, "You see this, yeah You're not a mum, to any of us. You never have been."
Josie shrugged her daughter's hand of her wrist before pointing at herself, "I birthed you lot. I had to endure months of torture and hours of horrible labour, six times."
Vanessa rolled her jaw, cringing slightly as pain blossomed through her face, "None of us made you have more children. You made the decision to throw your birth control in the bin and then go on to tell your bloody boyfriends that you were still on it!"
"You what?" Cain's voice rumbled through the room, causing Josie's eyes to grow wide.
Vanessa had forgotten he was even in the room. She had presumed he had taken herself into the kitchen. But no, he stood against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest, watching the scene unfold. Nessa had been somewhat used to her mother's boyfriends joining in on the beating.
"You fucking cunt," Josie spat at her daughter quietly before rotating to face her boyfriend, "She's lying. She always is."
Vanessa began to move over towards the door of the living room, her right eye closed as blood dripped over her eyelid and she could feel a black eye forming.ย
"You aren't going anywhere!" Josie yelled.
Fourteen year old Vanessa was quick as she throw open the front door before sprinting out onto the cobbled pathway with bare feet and still in her pyjamas.
"VANESSA!" Her mother roared, as she dashed outside after her daughter, "Don't you fucking dare! You come back here now!"
Throwing her head over her shoulder to see her mother right behind her, Vanessa broke off into a run along the stone pavements, not caring about the pain surging from the bases of her feet as she heard her mum's car start up.
Her neighbour watched with furrowed brows as Vanessa surged past quickly, nearly causing the old lady to drop her bags.
Vanessa knew where she was going; the police station. It was ten minutes from her house at walking pace, and as she curved around a gate, she took the short cut through the park, taking two minutes off the journey. Her feet hit the wet grass as she dodged dogs and playing kids. Her head whipped to the side, watching her mum's old ford speed around the park, attempting to cut her off.
Dashing out of another gate, at the opposite end of the park field, her mum's car screeched to a stop in front of her. Cain was sat in the passenger seat, yelling into a phone while her mum hurried to throw open the car door, but Vanessa had already swerved around the vehicle and could see the police station in the distance.
"VANESSA!" Her mum screamed, but she was ignored as Nessa yelled at herself to keep moving, ignoring the cuts on her feet and the agony surging through her face.
Suddenly, a pair of arms wrapped around her small waist and she was lifted from the ground. Immediately, she knew it was Cain and thrashed violently in his arms, kicking her legs and punching him wherever possible. She screamed bloody murder, but all the people near by watched from afar with scared faces.
In their eyes, Vanessa Hutchins was an unstable fourteen year old girl who had episodes where she didn't know who she was, and would go so crazy that she would beat herself up. The whole side of London knew about this rumour, and never did anything to help the small girl.
With all her force, Vanessa slammed her head back, knocking her skull against Cain's nose and he let out a loud yell, dropping the small fourteen year old. Instantly, she was running again, causing her mother to shout at her boyfriend in anger.
Hearing Cain's footsteps begin again, she pushed herself further, the muscles in her legs aching as she slammed her shoulder against the police station doors in a hurry to get inside.
She tumbled inside, smashing into an officer's chest, who caught her. She raised her head to meet his gaze, and attempted to speak but her deep breathing prevented her from uttering a single word.
"Nessa?" The officer asked, recognising her despite the blood soaking her face, "What the bloody hell's happened to you?"
Then Cain and Josie barrelled through the doors, sliding to a stop beside one another while panting heavily, hunching over slightly. Vanessa's jaw clenched and she squirmed her away round behind the officer, clutching tightly to his jacket.
He watched as she hid behind him, and his gaze floated up to the two exhausted adults with a raised brow, "Let me guess, Josie, she's had an episode again?"
Josie was quick to straighten up and nod enthusiastically, her hand held against her chest, "My gosh, yes. So so much worse than before. She's terrified my kids."
"She is your kid, Josie," The officer snapped, "Always has been. Would you also mind telling me how she got the bleeding face?"
"I've told you before!" Josie hissed, "Her episodes cause self harm."
The officer shook his head, "She's not wearing rings, Josie. The cuts on her faces are too precise to be self harm." His eyes flickered down to her mother's hands, scanning over the four rings decorating her fingers.
Josie followed his gaze and was quick to hide her hand in her jacket pocket.
Vanessa's eyes narrowed as she watched four more people hurry through the police station doors and she was quick to step out from behind the officer and meet her siblings as they charged towards her.
"What the hell are you lot doing here?" Josie screamed, "She'sโ she's not safe!"
Vanessa looked over her shoulder at the officer and with a small victorious smirk, she nodded.
"Please, come with me, Miss Hutchins," The officer called, motioning for her to follow him to the back, "I need your statement on how she got those cuts on record. Just in case you decide to change your story."
Josie swallows thickly, but followed after him slowly, sending a hard glare towards her eldest daughter, who sent her a small wave as she disappeared around the corner.
"Kids, home," Cain's voice demanded from behind the siblings, causing Vanessa's face to drop.
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authors note.
small back story
not proof read ๐
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