✎𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐄𝐍 ───── 𝐈𝐓'𝐃 𝐁𝐄 𝐒𝐎 𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐘𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐄

❪✟☠︎♔ꠋ⦁○✺↷♕❫

THE BRIGHT SUNLIGHT SPILLING INTO SHAY'S BEDROOM WAS WHAT WOKE HER THE NEXT MORNING. A groan immediately left her lips as she slowly opened her blue orbs, the headache from last night before still occupying her brain.

Shay felt like her head was going to explode trying to wrap her head around the information Jax had unloaded onto her late last night. It felt like somebody was taking a jackhammer to her brain every time she remembered that he had killed an ATF agent. It was exhausting the young mother, trying to make her brain think of scenarios so that there was no way this would blow back on Jax or the club.

A deep sigh left the miller woman's mouth as she removed herself from the comforts and safety of her bed. If this ATF agent's murder was somehow linked back to Jax, she knew it would mean death for the prince of charming. There was no way he would get anything other than the death penalty for the murder of a federal agent — that was if he even made it to a trial.

Slowly tiptoeing passed Leela's room as to not wake up the sleeping child, Shay felt another sigh left her lips as she walked into the living room only to see Jax passed out on the couch. Shay knew he didn't leave last night even after she practically spat goodnight a him and swiftly walked off to her bedroom. She had heard the shower turn on not long after and had heard him over the baby monitor taking care of Leela during various hours of the night.

"Jax." Shay whispered-yelled as she shook the sleeping blonde's shoulder. "Jax, wake the fuck up." The raven haired woman said more sternly this time. Her patience already growing thin with the teller man.

"Jesus Christ." Jax yawned, stretching his arms above his head. "I'm up Mills." He said while running a hand through his hair, quickly getting into a sitting up position as his ocean blue eyes looked over Shay.

Jax Teller would never admit it to anyone — not even himself most days, but he would make Shay his old lady if she would say yes. The VP of Samcro knew Shay Miller would be the perfect old lady for him, but she didn't want to be an old lady. She had made that perfectly clear when they started hooking up that that's all they were doing, and she had made it even more clearer when she began dating Ben.

"Jax, are you fucking listening to me?"

Shay's exasperated voice broke Jax from his wandering thoughts. Jax stood up from the couch, standing in front of the mother of his daughter, looking into her blue eyes seeing the fear in them that she was so desperately trying to hide. Shay never liked to show fear in front of anyone but Jax knew everything there was to know about the miller woman. He knew when she was scared, he knew when she was sad, and he knew when him and the club were the cause of it.

"What did you do with the fucking clothes?" Shay questioned, pinching the bridge of her nose. One part of her annoyed of having to repeat herself the other part of her trying to keep the headache from growing into a full blown migraine.

The raven haired woman crossed her arms across her chest as she waited for a response. Her only hope was that he hadn't been fucking stupid and buried them in her backyard. Now, she wasn't saying Jax was stupid enough to do something like that, but sometimes people — even the smartest ones — can do the dumbest things.

"I took care of them." Jax said lowly.

He didn't want Shay to worry about the evidence from the night before. He had already roped her into too much of his shit. He didn't need to tell her anymore.

"Can you watch Leela for a few?" Shay asked with a sigh.

The raven haired woman knew she wasn't going to get the whereabouts of the clothes from him and she was okay with that. She already knew too much and would be in just as much trouble as him if shit ever blew back onto him.

"Yeah." Jax nodded. "Where are you going?" He questioned while raising an eyebrow towards the miller woman.

"I gotta go see a man about a horse." Shay simply said as a smirk took over her face.

▂▂▂▂▂

SHAY STOOD OUTSIDE THE FAMILIAR HOUSE HER FIST RAISED TO KNOCK AGAINST THE OLD DOOR, A SIGH leaving her lips as she moved her fist closed towards the door getting ready to knock only to have the door flung open, surprising the woman.

"What are you doing here?" Tara Knowles seethed as she stared down the miller woman standing in front of her.

"Well, I told Jax I was going to see a man about a horse, but I found myself here." Shay stated with sarcasm dripping from every word.

Once the surprise of the door being flung open and Tara ruining her surprise visit had worn off Shay immediately went into her bitchy and sarcastic usual self like she always was around Tara.

"I'm not in the mood for you today, Shay." Tara said with a sigh as she began to close the door only to be quickly stopped by Shay's foot.

"I know about what happened last night." Shay quickly said in a low voice as she pushed herself into Tara's house not giving one fuck that the doctor could very well call Charming PD on her if she wanted to.

"What did you just say?" Tara questioned in disbelief as her eyes widened at Shay's words.

"You heard me." Shay simply stated as she closed the door. "I know Jax killed an ATF agent because of you. I know it was that guy at the fundraiser that I asked you about, and probably the same guy that was lurking around the hospital." Shay eyed the brunette doctor disdain.

"See, the way I see it is that you came back to Charming knowing that Jax would safe you, because let's face it we all know he's still in love with you. We all know Jax can't help himself when it comes to you. He's got this knight in shining armor complex. So, you calling him for help was like a drug to him."

"Shay," Tara opened her mouth, cutting the miller woman off. The brunette doctor looked determined but Shay could tell there was a fear in her eyes.

"Don't interrupt. Now, Jax is blind when it comes to you. You'll fuck him up again and leave everyone here to pick up the pieces. I mean, you got him to do your dirty work and you fucked him so what else do you need?"

"Fuck you." Tara spat,

"I didn't come back here for Jax or for him to save me. I came here to get away from Josh Kohn. I didn't think he would follow me here! You stand there all high and mighty up on your pedestal because you didn't leave Charming and you didn't break Jax's heart. Doesn't it fucking suck to be Samcro's princess? Don't you ever get tired of being a mini Gemma and not your own person, Shay? Doesn't it suck to be second best to me?"

Shay's face remained blank as she stared at Tara, letting the woman get all her anger and hate out.

"You may have Jax's child but you'll never have his heart." Tara finished as her nose flared and rage soared in her eyes.

"Did it feel good to get that all out, doc?" Shay asked with sarcasm. "Feel therapeutic?"

Tara let out a scoff as she rolled her eyes at the infuriating raven haired woman. "What do you want, Shay?" The Knowles woman questioned with exhaustion clear in her voice.

"Honestly, I came to see if you were okay." Shay spoke genuinely. "Jax told me everything. I know you think I'm this hateful bitch, but you didn't deserve that man hurting you like that."

Shock overtook Tara's features for a moment before she quickly regained her composure. She couldn't believe Shay Miller was standing in front of her asking her if she was okay. The same Shay Miller that threatened her a few days ago.

"I'm as okay as expected." Tara answered honestly.

Shay nodded. The two were never going to have some deep heart to heart. There was too much damage done between them long ago that would never heal.

"See you around, doc." Shay smirked before swiftly exiting Tara's house.

▂▂▂▂▂

"SHAY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

Shay stared into Ben's confused dark brown eyes. Since he had started staying at his house they had been seen less and less of each other which was Ben's idea not hers. Ben had asked for some space while he tried to think some things through and Shay had given him the space he asked for, but right now she just wanted to see him and hear his comforting words.

"Am I a bad person, Ben?" Shay questioned, her watery blue eyes searching his face for an answer.

"What? Where is this coming from?" Ben questioned.

He could see the tears building up in Shay's blue eyes, his heart breaking as he stared at the woman he loved. Ben hated to see Shay like this. There were moments in their relationship when she broke down and questioned herself, but those moments were rare. Shay walked around with so much confidence and her head held high that when those moments of vulnerability seeped through the cracks in her armor it broke him.

"Ben, am I a bad person?" Shay's voice cracked as she repeated the question.

Ever since she left Tara's house the doctor's rage filled words kept swimming through her head. Normally, the things people said about her or felt about her didn't bother her. Shay let it go like water off of a duck's back, but she couldn't help but feel like there was some truth to Tara's words.

"No. You're not a bad person, Shay." Ben's voice was soft as place a large hand softly on the side of Shay's face. "I don't think you could ever be a bad person." He added as he rubbed his thumb across her cheek.

"Thank you, Ben." Shay smiled as she leaned in towards him, placing a small kiss on his lips.

"Anytime Shay." Ben smiled.

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A/N:
I really like how this chapter came out. Thank you for all the votes, comments, and views! ❤️