"Y/N, right?" Jungkook's hopeful voice stopped every function in Hwan's mind.

Y/N... What did I get myself into?

"M-my sister is dead..." Hwan whispered.

Jungkook's heart stopped. It was like there's no oxygen around him to take. Is his sister dead? Was she Y/N? Y/N is dead?

No...

No..

No.

No!

She wasn't Y/N...

"Her name was...." He paused as no fucking name was ready to cross his mind.

C'mon! Wtf!

"Her name was... S-seola."

Good job man! I love your ass!

Jungkook backed away, wanting to show one of his best smiles, but hesitating because it was not appropriate after all. His sister is dead.

But Y/N is not dead. Seola is dead.

Not Y/N.

Maybe just my mind played with me when I saw similarities in Hwan and Y/N.

"Sorry. I gotta go." Jungkook said. And before Hwan could ask him, he stormed out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Hwan remained in his place, looking at the closed door. A lot of thoughts and questions running around his mind.

Why is he asking about Y/N?

Does he know her?

With thoes un answered questions he walked to his bed, throwing him self on it.

Suddenly the moments of being stubborn and cold towards thoes guys crossed his mind.

Maybe I should change, or else they'll kick my ass out. They're so good with me, I shouldn't be like this.

Bangtan boys were so friendly and funny, they were a family. A complete family. 7 years together. Happy with eachother. They sure would fight with each other, that normally happens in every family. But nothing made them hate eachother.

They'd take a bullet for eachother.

They weren't like that only towards eachother, but for thier surrounding too.Taking Hwan as an example, they never looked at him as a worker, but like thier friend, and who knows, maybe like thier brother in future.

I should be nice towards them.

He was happy that night. He survived being half-naked infront of everyone. Survived from the odd action from Jungkook. And now he decided to be a nicer person, perfect.

His eyelids got heavier as the smile was still on his soft face. He ran his fingers through his newly cut hair, and closed his eyes, slowly drifting to dreamland.

Jungkook's pov:

"I'm here Jungkook, I'm with you every day, but...." Y/N's soft voice was like a melody to my ears.

We both were in a beautiful garden full of colorful flowers of spring, the slow wind making them dance from side to side.

I have my arms wrapped around Y/N's small waist, looking down at her, not being able to control my self, I placed small kisses on her forehead every minute.

"But what baby?" I asked her.

"But i can't recognize you, I can't remember you." Her sad voice shattered me into pieces. The oxygen shit left my lungs.

"What do you mean, baby?" I furrowed my eyebrows. She's with me, fucking calling me Jungkook.

She looked at my eyes, a small tear leaving her right eye. The tears became a huge white dust and swallowed her. My arms fall to my sides, where's she?

Where did she go? How did she go?

"Y/N?"

"Y/N?!"

"Y/N!!"

My eyes opened and I quickly sat up. Sweat have covered my body, and an unbearable heat was firing me.

It was a dream. It's okay. Every thing's okay.

Y/N...

At least she's not Hwan's dead sister. I believe in that she's still alive, breathing on a piece of this earth.

I looked at the clock hanging on the wall and read the time.

7 in the morning...

Deciding to take a shower, i yanked off the blanket and walked to my bathroom.

After getting dressed, I put on my earrings, and combed my hair, grabbed my phone and walked out of my room.

I heard my hyungs' voices coming from the dining room, and I went there.

I found everyone sitting except Jimin hyung who was turning around but stopped as soon as he saw me. " Jk! Come here, I was about to come and wake you up." He said.p

"I think he has grown up, no need to wake him up anymore." Yoongi hyung
teased.

"My boy! He's a grown man now!" Jin hyung said as he wiped his fake tears off.

"Oh please.." I said as I sat on the chair, totally annoyed by thier bright-annoying mood at this early morning.

Can they just spend a day without saying that I'm a grown man now?

My thought got interrupted when Hwan came in the kitchen with a strawberry jam in his hand, and he was smiling. I repeat, he was smiling.

He handed Jimin hyung the jam.

"My precious jam!" Jimin hyung said and every one let out a sigh of disbelief.

"Oh Jungkook hyung, good morning." I looked at Hwan who was now sitting on a chair, smiling brightly at me.

This is so odd, is this Hwan?

"Morning Hwan." I returned the smile.

At least he isn't giving that cold expression, he looks so ugly like that.

Narrator:

It was late at night when the boys came back home from practice. They were all tired, all they wanted was a comfy bed to sleep on.

Hwan was sitting on the couches waiting for them to comeback. That was one of his new behaviors when he tried to change to a better person.

"Welcome back." Hwan said as he stood up.

Everyone nodded in his way, too tired to answer him by words.

"Are you guys hungry? I can make you guys something."

"No, thanks. I think we're all going to sleep." Yoongi answered.

Like said, everyone went to thier bedrooms, ending thier tiredness by sleeping.

Next day was rest for the boys, they were all sitting in the living room, while Hwan was cleaning the kitchen after making lunch.

Once he was finished, he wanted to go to his room, but Jungkook stopped him in his way.

"Come on Hwan, it's time for our favorite drama, come and watch it with us." He said as he placed a bowl of chips on his thighs, sitting between Jimin and Taehyung.

Not wanting to break the bunny like guy's heart, he walked in the living room, sitting on the arm chair.

Soon the drama started and everyone fell in a deep silence, watching the TV.

"NOOO! MOM! DAD! NOOO!"

*The car crashed onto a tree.*

The parents have thier head drenched in blood, while the little girl was unconscious as well in the backseat.

The scene of the drama took all the breath away from Hwan. Tears burned the back of his eyes, trying hard to hold them back.

No, Hwan, no.

Tears didn't stop anyway, they just didn't obeyed him. But as soon as they slide down, he quickly wiped them away.

"Whoa are you crying?" Taehyung's voice startled him. He looked at Taehyung. "No-"

"Oh yeas, I'm not blind. You are crying."

You Are Crying.

I'm crying.

More tears streamed down. And soft sobs left his mouth. He put his hand on his chest, where his heart is, clutching his shirt tightly. His heart was aching. It really was a bad pain.

That confused everyone in the room. What's wrong with him? He was just fine a moment ago.

It was thier very first time seeing Hwan crying, and to be honest, his state made them feel sad for him.

Jimin being the kind hearted person, stood up and rushed towards him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" His soft voice asked. But he only got more tears and sobs in return. "Hwannie, are you hurt? Say something! You're freaking us out!"

By now, all of them had circled around him, Jimin still crouched down infront of him.

Jungkook's heart somehow skipped. This was so familiar to him. This state. This face. This crying...

The way he cried, the way he sobbed, the way he clutched his heart.

It hurts to see such a scene...

"Hwan, tell us what's wrong." Namjoon said.

Hwan relized that he's crying a mess, he looked up and saw them.

Saw bangtan boys surrounding him while he's crying his heart out.

Who in the fuck thought that I'd be crying infront of these guys someday... I'm crying infront of them... Infront of Jungkook...

Quickly wiping his tears away, he took a deep breath. "I-i I'm sorry... That scene of the drama made me remember something... T-that's all.." His shaky voice stated.

"You know you can tell us if you want." Jungkook told him. He looked at him, finding his doe eyes full of concern.

Oh Jungkook, don't look at me like that....

"O-okay..." He took a deep breath again. This will be difficult.

"I don't really remember what happened, but they told me the story. When I was 17 years old, for some issues me and my family had to leave our city Busan, and come to Seoul. My dad was so excited about that. He... He was so happy. He didn't take plane and wanted to drive by himself. His happiness was ours, so me and my Mom agreed."

Big thick tears freed themselves from his eyes. Thoes painful unremembered memories were like knives, stabbing his heart.

"In our way there, some problems came in our cars way. That caused a big car crash." A sob left his mouth.

These sobs are so familiar! These tears as well! Jungkook's mind screamed.

All of them were deep in listening to his story, that they didn't notice that they are now sitting infront of him. As if Hwan was there grandmother, telling her nephews stories.

"My parents died there, and i got a big scar inside my head. I-i was unconscious for a whole week... And when I woke up, I didn't remember anything except my family. I don't know how my childhood was. I don't know how my school life was. I don't even know if I had friends or not..."

"I was so broken, so frustrated, so confused. I had a family, and out of nowhere, I lost them. I was so lonely. All by myself in this Seoul. I stayed in an orphanage untill i turned to 18, then I started working. I collected money and bought a small apartment in a cheap part of the city."

"I spend two years like that. Only working, and coming back home. Until..."

Although hot tears were soaking his face, he managed to crack a small smile while saying, "I watched one of you guys' MV. I don't exactly remember wich one I watched, because I watched several ones at once. It was 2017, I was 20 years old. That was when happiness came back to me. That was when I smiled for the first time in a while..."

"You're an army?" Namjoon asked, a shocked expression shown on his face.

Hwan smiled wider. "A real one. You're all a reason that I wanted to live longer. My cold and color less apartment turned into a very warm and colorful house full of beautiful pictures of you guys. Every thing changed. I became a better person. My only intention for coming here and working for you guys was, I wanted to do something in return for you guys, because you all are a reason that I'm breathing happily right now."

(A/N) BTS is the reason that I'm a happy person rn. A reason that I'm a better person now. I love them with my whole heart.

I really don't know if there's someone continuing to read this ff (expect for a few ones I know) if you're here with me, going through this journey with me, give my story some of your love. Vote and leave comments. I will update till the end of the story, but I deserve some vote right?

Love you all 💜

Shine, dream, and smile💜🌌