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❛ ᴛʜᴇ ʙ. ʙ. ᴇꜰꜰᴇᴄᴛ​​​​​​​​​​. ❜ ° . ༄
- ͙۪۪˚   ▎❛ 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄 ❜   ▎˚ ͙۪۪̥◌
»»————- ꒰ ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴏʟᴅ
ᴅᴀʏs, sᴏʀᴛ ᴏғ ꒱　


❝ OOH! THAT'S ONE
BADASS STAPLER! ❞

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Five year old Numbers Five and Eight were in the boy's room as he scribbled out equations on a chalkboard while Alexa sat on his bed as she drew. Despite their young ages, both preferred the quiet stillness of the other's company to their sibling's chaos. After all, One had Three, Four had Six, and Two stuck around Mom more often than not which left Five and Eight as partners with Seven occasionally tagging along.

The blonde girl looked up to where her favorite family member was working and watched the numbers appear in front of her eyes as he wrote. He was always the smartest of their siblings which was a trait that she greatly admired. Feeling her eyes on him, the boy couldn't help but look over his shoulder to smile smugly. "See something interesting?" he asked.

Eight rolled her eyes. "I would if you stopped writing those stupid numbers. You know I haven't got the head for them." Although— despite her complaining— she never really minded when he worked.

"The numbers aren't stupid," Five protested. "I could teach you, if you want."

"I know the numbers aren't stupid— it's me," she sighed. Sometimes she felt that way around him even if it was unintentional.

The boy dropped the chalk on the ledge and came to the bedside. He grabbed her wrists to easily pull her up to a standing position. "C'mon, Eight, it's easy. You'll see."

Confidently, he pushed her towards the chalkboard and began pointing out equations. The blonde tried to follow along as best she could but lost the numbers along the way in favor of watching how his expression lit up as he talked about something he loved.

☂☂☂

All six siblings sat in the living room later that day as the fire crackled next to them. Klaus was at the bar making a drink. Allison had chosen one of the chairs and already had an alcoholic beverage in her hand. Diego sat in another chair while Alexa and Vanya shared the couch. Luther sat in front of them awkwardly before he stood after a moment of silence. "Um, I guess we should get started. So I figured we'd have a sort of memorial service in the courtyard at sundown; say a few words at dad's favorite spot."

Alexa gave him a surprised look. "Dad had a favorite spot?" she asked.

"You know, in front of the oak tree?" he asked. All of his siblings looked clueless. "We used to sit out there all the time. None of you ever did that?"

Where was this side of dad when I needed him? she thought, feeling a bit slighted that Luther got special treatment. It's not like I wanted to spend more time with dad but the gesture would've been appreciated.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by Klaus' question: "will there be refreshments? Tea? Scones? Cucumber sandwiches are always a winner."

Alexa gave him an amused smile and noted as he joined the meeting that the skirt he wore was Allison's.

"I think we could get Mom to make some cookies," she answered seriously but the amusement in her eyes gave her intentions away. "She did ask earlier when I first arrived."

Luther gave them an irritated glance. "What? No. Don't encourage him, Alexa— and put that out. You know dad didn't like smoking in the house," he said in reference to cigarette the man was holding.

"Is that my skirt?" Allison asked, finally noticing their brother's attire.

Alexa rolled her eyes, unsurprised that their meeting was falling apart.

"What?" asked Klaus as he took a seat next to her. "Oh yeah, this. I found it in your room. It's a little dated, I know, but it's breezy on the. . . bits." He gestured to below his waist, causing Alexa to actually let out a chuckle.

"Listen up. There's still some important things we need to discuss, alright?"

Alexa sighed and muttered, "here it comes." It was now going to be Luther Lecture Time™ .

"Like what?" Diego asked.

"Like the way he died."

The blonde sighed again and glanced at the door. She could leave but she also was supposed to protect them. If something had happened to their father, her siblings could be next so unfortunately, Luther's ideas— or what could be passed for ideas— had to be heard.

"I don't understand," Allison said. "I thought they said it was a heart attack."

"Yeah, according to the coroner."

"Well, wouldn't they know?" Vanya asked.

"Theoretically," Luther responded.

"Theoretically?"

"I'm just saying, at the very least, something happened," he insisted. "The last time that I talked to Dad, he sounded strange."

Alexa thought about when she'd heard the news and how she speculated that his death hadn't been ordinary. My god, she thought. I sound like Luther! As much as she cared for her brother, the thought horrified her so much that she tuned out the rest of the discussion to mentally slap herself for sounding like a paranoid moon-man. She only came back when her brother changed the subject: "then there's the issue of the missing monocle."

"Who gives a shit about a stupid monocle?" Diego asked.

"Exactly, it's worthless. So whoever took it, I think it was personal. Someone close to him. Someone with a grudge," Luther insisted.

Alexa stared at her brother as her eyes widened when she realized what he was insinuating. Really, Luther? she thought. Just because you're dad's favorite doesn't mean that the rest of us wanted him dead! (Even if the thought had crossed her mind once or twice in specific situations.)

Her other siblings seemed to get his meaning too and the meeting broke up soon after with Klaus' customary humor. "Sorry, I'm just gonna go murder Mom. Be right back."

Alexa stood up too as she gave her brother a disappointed look which spoke more than words ever could and left the room.

"Wait, guys— Allison—" he called after them desperately, but no one listened.

☂☂☂
[Seventeen Years Ago]

"In five, four, three, two— this is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for Channel 2 News outside of the Capital West bank at Main and Sixth. A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago and took an unknown number of hostages," the reporter announced in front of the building surrounded by police and onlookers. Inside there was a much different story. 

"Hey, get them behind the counter!" one of the robbers called over the sound of an alarm blaring. "Now you've put me in a position where I gotta do something I don't want to do." A young Allison skipped up to the man to get his attention. "Hey, get back with the others!" he commanded.

The girl leaned forward fearlessly as she began: "I heard a rumor."

"What? What did you say?" he asked.

Allison cupped a hand to her mouth. "I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot."

The man locked his gun and pointed it at his comrade, who exclaimed, "hey, dude. What the hell?" He was cut off with a groan thanks to the bullet that was now in his foot.

The hostages behind the counter screamed as gunshots rang throughout the building and the sound rang in Alexa's ears. Coming up behind her sister, the blonde blinked once as her blue eyes intensified in color. She then placed her hands in front of her, towards Allison, before a bright blue barrier formed in front of her to shield the girl from accidental gunfire.

A moment later, Luther crashed through the roof to power throw two of the men while Diego ran from the other side throwing his knives as he said, "guns are for sissies! Real men throw knives!"

Laughing, Alexa moved her shield away from her sister and in front of Luther for a split second before feeling the draw of air that came from the rushing bullet aiming for Diego. Her shield was there first and it bounced off of it harmlessly so that it clattered to the ground. Once they had the final man cornered on the table, he looked panicked. "Get back you freaks!"

Diego smirked up at him. "Hey, be careful up there, buddy."

"Get back now!" the man yelled.

"Wouldn't want you to get hurt," Allison taunted.

"Yeah," Alexa added. "I don't think you banked on that happening today."

Five appeared in front of him, sitting cross legged before he disappeared in the next second as the man fired rapidly at the spot where he'd been sitting. The boy reappeared in front of him but the man was no longer holding a gun.

"Ooh! That's one badass stapler!" he exclaimed with a smirk. He blinked away again to show up next to the blonde, who shared a smile with him.

The seven of them circled around the door while Ben looked apprehensive. "Do we really have to do this?"

Alexa felt a tug of pity for him and was tempted to say that he didn't, but she knew their father would find out and be mad at them for that.

"Come on, Ben. There's more guys in the vault," Luther prompted him.

The boy sighed miserably. "I didn't sign up for this," he said before he opened the door.

The group ignored the hostages who were running from the building in favor of watching their brother's silhouette grow tentacles to take care of the men inside of the vault. Their brother reappeared and asked, "can we go home now?"

Alexa gave him a soft smile and she grabbed his arm to gently tug him towards the door. Next to Five, Ben was her favorite and they often spent time reading together when the other boy wanted to be alone.

They made their way to the front steps of the bank where reporter's cameras were going off a mile a minute. Their father met them there and gave a speech with his typical showiness. "Our world is changing, has changed. There are some among us gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary. I have adopted seven such children. I give you the inaugural class of the Umbrella Academy."

Alexa couldn't help but feel proud as she stood outside the bank in her uniform with her siblings around her. It was their duty to protect the world when others couldn't and she knew then that they were destined for great things— only she didn't know how far they'd fall first.