Chirp...chirp..

The sunlight streaming in her curtain is bright, slowly began to awaken the girl who was still on her back without caring about anything in the world, her ears seemed to be covered by an iron gate that would only open when her "Sleeping bar" was full and her dreams ended with a good ending.

"Hum.."

[F/n]'s arm flew to her face , pulling a  hair strand out of her mouth before drowning in her undescribable dream again.

Guess what , her morning's going to be ruined in 10 seconds.

Okay , my bad.

With all those morning wars and late dash to school? Her morning's always ruined.

But not today.(*"NOT TODAY" BTS INTENSIFIES*)

She's going to face something she had always tried to avoid.

"Torihada ga ! Tomaranai ! Inochi ga atsuku moete iru~~ Genkai no saki.. sono saki e--"

TAP!!

Her finger which crept to her phone in force accidentally tapped the red button.

She could admit that it's "an accident" to whoever called her and just sleep again to continue her dream, but because of a weird feeling in her chest this early morning , her concerned ass got up from her bed slowly like a rusty robot , her hand reached for her phone on the table next to her bed.

Her red ruby eyes squinted  in order to look at the caller under the blinding sunlight and with a pair of eyes she had kept close for straight 7 hours.

"Just who....."

1 missed call from "NiShiNa_morelike_NiSHINEEE*".

"Nishi..?"

[F/n] pushed her [A/c] plushie aside and took her phone to her face , trying to call her back but got called first by Nishina.

Meep!

"Ni-"
"[F/N]!!! WHERE ARE YOU?! ARE YOU OKAY?! STAY THERE , I'M COMING OVER?!"

Her loud screeches beat her out of it.

"Nishina,  what the hell..? Please don't break my membrana timpani this early..." [F/n] groggily hugged her [A/c] body pillow , snuggling her head to the pillow reluctantly without any care in the world.

"NO...NO! THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO SLEEP.[F/N], REMEMBER OIKAWA T-RASH-OORU?? CHECK THIS PHOTO I SENT YOU!"

Starting to feel anxious , [F/n] reached back to her phone , opening the LINE and straight up clicked on her chat with Nishina , failed to realize that Nishina knew his name although she had never told her anything about him.

She had sent a picture.

A picture of Oikawa Tooru's LINE profile , with his own name as his username and a narcisstic bio , and what's catching her eyes--

Her red ruby eyes.

Staring back at her from the circle template of his profile picture.

Blood drains from her head as she proceeded through her mind about what had happened.Her heartbeats echoed loudly that she felt like even Koushi can even hear it from his room.

Her vision started to get blurry , sweats rolling down her temple in such a short time.Her hand trembled and her phone slipped out of her hand , but her mind's already occupied on something else.

"[F/N]?? [F/N] ??!" Nishina's concerned shouting left unheard by [F/n], as the girl has buried her head in her pillow , with trembling body , enxiety devouring her sane mind.

She wanted to cry , but she can't.Her teeth chattered,  her head's spinning,  and she bit her lip in order to stop breathing rapidly and chattering her teeth.

But she couldn't stop.

The image of people knowing her existence , the image of larger amount of people treating her just like the way bullies in her elementary school treated her , the image of Koushi suffering from so much trouble that might come to the light.

It hurts.

"I....don...n't.....w...wh...why..."

At this point , everything she said is a series of unclear sounds.

"[F/n] , [F/n]..!!" Nishina's voice rocketed as she caught her unclear responses , knowing immediately that the girl's hyperventilating.

The call ended suddenly , leaving [F/n] shaking and heavy breathing rapidly on her bed with wide restless eyes , meanwhile a ringtone boomed in the next room.

It took 5 seconds for her to wait for the door to open.Right there , Koushi still in his pajama , literally kicked her door open and barged in.

Nishina hung on her because she's calling on Koushi.

He quickly approached his trembling twin sister , panic written all over his face.

"[F/N], [F/N]..!!!" Koushi patted on her back to comfort her , but to no avail.He desperately looked all over her room, spotting her water bottle on her desk , left abandoned after the late tiring practice yesterday.

He snatched the [F/c] bottle before opening the lid franticly and offered them to her.

She had pulled out her head from the pillow earlier and still breathing rapidly with panicked expression,  hands clutching to Koushi desperately.

Yet she won't take the water.

Koushi gritted his teeth.

Hyperventilating...hyperventilating.... what to do....

....!!!

"[F/N].Calm down , okay?? H-Here..!" He seized an unused paperbag from her drawer , shoving it to [F/n] who as fast as the ligtning breathed to it.

"Deep breaths , [F/n] , deep...breaths," he instructed , trying to calm himself at the same time."Hold your breath for a few sec...just like what mom taught , remember..??"

[F/n] teared up , nodding while inhaling shaky breath at the same time.

Their mother had taught them how to treat hyperventilation in any emergency since [F/n] were having anxiety problems.They never thought they'll need it now.

Her breath has calmed down , tears streamed down her cheeks , a relieved look started to show on her twin's face.
But a glint of confusion stayed in his hazel orbs.

He decided wait until she gets calmer , then he'll ask her to tell him everything.He grabbed back the water bottle and lightly shoved it to her hands , which seems to have stopped trembling.

"Drink , and breath deeply, slow...gently," He led her , his words sank in her head quickly as she did what he told her.

She let out a whimper , before slumping her body to the head of the bed , her pupils gradually stopped dilating.

Koushi palmed her cheek and forehead , sighing in relief as she seemed to just hyperventilate , no symptoms of fever or whatever more coming in line.

"[F/n]...." his lips pursed in a thin line , eyes pierced into hers.He won't go away without any answer.[F/n] knows that for sure.    

"What happened..?"

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[F/n]'s POV (it has  been so long innit--)

"K-Koushi..! NO..!! CALM DOWN..!!" I desperately clutched into his shirt , my other arm circled around his waist , my lower body still sprawled on my bed , preventing him from stomping out of the room.

It was currently unclear how his anger was directed at Shiho or Oikawa.

All written on his face are betrayed, disappointment, rage , and slight panic.
His arms tried to pry my arms away from his waist , while he yelled angrily.

"I thought Shiho said he'll take care of him..!!! Now we have to deal with that son of a-- [F/n] , let go of me!! You think keep silent will make these problems go away??!! Stop being a coward , [F/n]..You have to--"

SLAP!

"Huh...?" Koushi held his right cheek with a stunned expression, hazel orbs peered over his shoulder at me , wide eyed.

I frowned , trying to hold back tears.
"You think you're the only one who want to give lessons to that bastard..?! You think I'm okay being the scapegoat in this bullshit??!" I yelled all my anger out , proving him that I'm not just someone who can receive all accuses and sit pretty doing nothing.

"I AM MAD , but now's not the time to make troubles.I think there's no way people will immediately believe that it's my true appearance , and i don't think they'll corner me like bullies in animes right in first day.If we act presumptuous like this , it'll only make things worse.." i bit my lip , trying to calm myself down and think rationally.Koushi would usually think wisely than i am , so I'm quite suprised he got triggered this quick.

Koushi scowled , harshly pulling my arms away from him , before stomping away.

"Just wait , those two will face my fists.."  he growled , eyes glanced at me for a second there."And [F/n].When i meet them , don't you dare stop me,"

His statement rang in my head , while the latter had left to his room , preparing to go to school.

I still bit my lip , looking down at my bed with hands on my head.

I don't actually want to go to school..But i can't also stay home , mom will question me , and i need to stop the false rumours from spreading..

I gulped , hugging my knees.

"Mom's right," i drowned my head in my arms and knees , scratching my head in frustration.

"I can't hide forever.."

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"What was that."

Koushi looked forward straight on the road,  not bothering to look at me.

I uncomfortably clutched on my bag strap more , my other hand gripped on the side of my skirt.

The screen of the phone on my hand showed a few messages i sent Nishina to calm down and cancel her plan visiting me and more importantly to note down the situation and response to the rumour if the rumour spreads in her school , Dateko.

We left apartment quicker than usual , trying to avoid contact with other students.But mostly , because of the confrontation this morning.

"We can't let mom know.." I sighed, shivering at the thought of how Koushi almost spilled about this morning's little accident to mom.

「"What was that chaotic noises i heard earlier..?" Mother walked sluggishly to my room , rubbing her eyes to adapt to the bright surrounding.

Seemed like she worked up until late night , she woke up because of us..

Suddenly , Koushi appeared from his room , already dressed in his gakuran.

"Mom , you won't believe what happened.There's this gu---"

"There's a guy who confessed to me via chat..!!" I interuppted right that instant, catching mother's attention immediately from Koushi.

A pair of eyes looked at me in suprise accompanied with a grin , while the other pair looked at me in disbelief and gaping mouth.

"Ooooh?? How does he look like..??" Mother approached me in tippytoes , like a highschool girl nudging her best friend to spill the tea.

I tugged the edge of my lips upwards.

"Well , i don't think it's important now.I rejected him politely.And anyway , i need to go to school early today, so let's save the conversation for later mom," i reached for my bag and phone as i stated , walking past mom and grabbed Koushi's hand with me.

"Oooh , how unfortunate.See you at night , dear! Take care ~~"  mother chirped before Koushi can open his mouth , and i put my shoes on in a blink , pulling him outside while he stumbled before he could entirely put his shoes on.

"Bye!"  I closed the door , before sighing out loud and walked out of the yard , opening the gate , walking ahead of Koushi who still looked at me with shocked expression.

"Koushi , let's go,"」

And so here we are , on our way to school.As much as i don't want to meet people's unpleasant gazes , i also want to know whether the spreading rumour also spreads in our school or not.

And that's quite bold of mom to assume there's someone out there who likes me to begin with.

It's bold for me to use that as an excuse too..

Who wants to date a demon eyed gremlin?

Koushi let out a big exhale as he shook his head.

"Since when did you become this stubborn..?"

A soft whisper escaped his lips , on the other hand i , mentally facepalmed.

Way to go , [F/n].Great job at showing down your high lying ability stat.

What else should i show next?

My maximum stat of fragility?

Hope not.

I seriously wanted to bawl my eyes out.

All these troubles , threats, rumours , bad responses , disgusted looks , insults,  and years of social distancing , just to protect myself , protect these demon red eyes  from the world.

Why should i hide in the first place anyway..?

I'm unconsciously slowing down my pace , the pavements became my interest right now.

Why..am i hiding again..?

To hide from them?

So i won't be bullied and harassed?

Because they have narrow minds and stupid beliefs of superstitions??

Or because they are scared?

..Buy why should i hide? It's not my fault.

It's not like i can curse people by looking at them.

Why should i hide to make them feel safe while i suffer in my entire life?

If it comes to the point where they all have seen my real eyes my their own eyes , i will not back down.

I'll show them how stupid and crappy those superstitions and rumours are.

You won't get hurt by looking at me , but you will get hurt by looking down and bullying me..

I gulped before overtaking with Koushi's pace.The top of Karasuno's  building can already be seen from where they stood.

They seemed to come pretty early.There are fewer students on the street to the school , yet anxiety had started to build inside her.Her inner stomach felt like it churned , and like her legs will give up in any second.

Imagine.

Those more than 300 students of Karasuno could hear those rumours and believe them by connecting them with their stupid superstitions,  and voila--

They'll look at me with the same gaze as those bitchy girls in my elementary shot me.

Mairi.

One name, aside from the Kira girl in my elementary back then.If Kira just "befriended" me for a solid month just to get closer to Koushi and make me her indirect slave , this Mairi officially appointed me as her personal slave for straight 3 years.Since my second year until the end of my fourth year , stopping at the beginning of fifth year because my mom had decided to homeschool me.

My elementary years are real life hell.I was a kid.I can't protect myself.I can't use softlenses to cover my eyes , and i don't know the real meaning behind those sly fake smiles.

Until i met the boy who gave me this necklace , with his stern bestfriend who often plays with me almost every week in an unpopulated house far away from my house.

After the boy moved with his family , i started to hate my neighbors and surroundings , so i used to cycle far to the next residences , and at that one point i found that unpopulated house.

And then i---

Wait.The boy and his stern bestfriend..?
No...i think i got my memory stirred up together...

I had entirely stopped walking.

I held my chin ,  while scrunching up my nose.

Wait...a minute...

I..No..So i played with a boy , in an empty field , and he was going to introduce me to the people who taught him , but he moved.

While his stern bestfriend....No...i don't think he brought anyone that time..

I remember facing and playing volleyball with two people...but not on that field..

I...do really mix up my memories...

I think...the boy who gave me this necklace and moved away...was different from the one who brought his stern friend and played with me in an unpopulated house..

Yeah.

Seriously , i got quarantined for straight 7 years , and i'm supposed to remember those very few memories of me escaping from house , but why my brain's being such a dick?

Oop--- i said the D word.

Forgive me , God.

I flinched the moment Koushi's loud and clear statement snapped me out of my trance.

He gave me a strange look.

"What are you doing there..?I thought you wanted to arrive at school as prompt as we can," he questioned my actions , a bit uncomfortable himself.

This is quite a serious matter , and we'll need to get this done as soon as we can.

"..Yeah.Let's go," i gave up the thoughts , mentally noting to myself to ask about this later when there's not so much troubles haunting our minds.

Whispers erupted behind us , and so we both turned swiftly , spotting two girls whispering to each other , sharing one's phone , checking out whatever on the phone with a giggle.

Cold sweats rolled down both our cheeks.

The rumour had spreaded this quick...?

For a second there , we both stopped on our tracks , eyeing the two girls who are too occupied in their whispering to notice two pair of honey brown eyes peering over to their phone.

We both released the breath we didn't realize we had held for a few seconds , when we just spotted some cute boys pictures on their phone screen.

"We're too restless.."

But that wash of relief is short-lived.

Right when we turned from a corner , nearing the school , there are a bunch of crowds , entering the school grounds with eyes all focused on their own phones.

"W-Wha...usually it's not this crowdy until the next 20 minutes.." Koushi stepped back in suprise.His concerned gaze shifted in a blink to me , checking my expression , if i seemed to change my mind and not willing to go to school today.

His widening eyes represents his amusement , as he sensed no regret in my eyes.I stepped forward , long strides ahead with clenched fists.

I've made up my mind this morning.

No more running , and making myself suffer.

I did nothing wrong for them to harass me like this.

They deserve to know , that i won't be the same and i can protect myself without burdening Koushi.

My  breath hitched for a second as some eyes looked up from their phone and looked at me before whispering to their companions on their sides , or just shaking their heads before looking down on their phone.

But i keep walking , with Koushi on my side.

All this time , i am a coward.

And i ain't going to maintain that attitude furthermore.

A pair of dark eyes looked at [F/n] from a far.

"This is happening quicker than i expected.."

"Good."

"I will get your revenge....."

"Mairi."

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I've got nothing much to say , just...

WE'RE IN THE CLIMAX OF THE STORY!!!!!!!!

yay--

*Shine-- in the meaning of "Die" in Japanese , not "Shine" in english.

☆Kuu☆