30|It was all my fault

Shadow blinked while scratching her head. She licks her lips turning her head to her left side, ignoring the man who was standing at her doorstep with a wide smile. She didn't know what to say or more likely how to say 'no' to him when he was grinning like a fool today.

She frowned when she paid attention to her thoughts. Why was she giving a fuck about his emotions? She wasn't like that before. Why does it matter if he gets hurt?

Why it's hard to say no today? She slowly looked at her front to see his bunny smile and her heart melted at that sight. The big doe eyes glowed with slight crinkles on the edges.

How could she say no?

"So, are you ready?" He asked her excitedly almost jumping in his place. His eyes were glowing like stars and his face was stretched in a wide grin. She shared things with him last night and asked for his help. He could probably see changes in their friendship but his smile fell at the thought. "Friends? We're not friends...."

"Oh, you're not wearing your mask today."

"What's the point now? You have seen me without it. Also, it only shows my mouth so..." he hums, nodding his head in deep thought.

Shadow clears her throat, gaining his attention. He hums, raising his brows as a smile again makes its way to his mouth. "I...I'm..." Shadow inhales a deep breath, fisting her hands. "Just fucking say it bitch!! What's so hard? Tell him to go!" 

Jungkook nods, insisting she speaks. She licks her dry lips. "Uh..." her nails dig into her hands. She wanted to say 'no'. "Of course." Jungkook smiles widely showing his pearly whites.

He turns around to leave when she voices out. "Where are you going?" He tilts his head, turns around with big doe eyes, and points backward. "Home?" Her mouth forms an "o" shape. "I thought you would...never mind." 

Jungkook shakes his head instantly, insisting she finishes what she was going to say. "Nothing. I will get ready now. I will call you."

Jungkook's eyes suddenly widen and he dashes toward her in curiosity. "Am I going to see your face?" She chuckles, shaking her head. "No." And shuts the door in his face. 

He pouts, kicking a pebble with his feet. "I don't know if this wait is worth it or not....but she did open up to me and asked for help. Stay patient Jeon Jungkook!"

_________

Shadow groans rubbing her palm on her face. "What the fuck I got myself into?!" She looks through her wardrobe to only find oversized hoodies, sweatshirts, oversized shirts, and leather jackets—that too all in black. "I don't even have clothes..."

She inhales a deep breath deciding to check some of the bags she put her old clothes in. While searching through the bags, she found an outfit that held a special place in her heart. Which brings back so many memories.

A sad smile tugs her face as she brings the outfit closer to her face, feeling the soft fabric against her face. 

Flashback

She smiled shyly, hiding her face in her hands. "Stop!" He smiled coming closer to her. "Why? Did I make the popular cold-hearted girl shy?" He teases her, laughing at her. "You're so bad!"

His eyes widen at her statement. "Saying my baby is pretty is being bad, huh? Then I'm really bad 'cause I'm gonna say it again and again."

She chuckles, shaking her head. "You're so stubborn!" He nods, raising his brow proudly as a smug smile stretches his handsome face.

"I am. This outfit looks so pretty on you. My favorite one." She smiles widely, adoring his face.

End of flashback

Tears rolled down her cheeks unknowingly. She kept clenching at the outfit. "Why you had to leave me all of a sudden? It was all my fault! I'm so sorry!! I'm so sorry!" She wiped her cheeks harshly, gulping her saliva.

Shadow gets up feeling numb to the pain she feels every day but it still manages to clench her heart. Clawing it and shattering it into millions of pieces. Taking a deep breath, she walks towards the mirror. Shadow places the dress near her body while tilting her head.

She purses her lips at the thought of people laughing at her body and making fun of her.

"Your body is beautiful. Don't be insecure baby." His soothing whispers that he used to say in her ear whenever she felt insecure were still as fresh as he told them tomorrow but the voice was fading away day by day. 

Closing her eyes, she made up her mind to wear the outfit she used to wear for him. 

After taking a bath and feeling refreshed she heads toward the mirror. A towel wrapped around her body. While humming her favorite song to ease her nerves she slowly walks towards the mirror.

Her eyes instantly made their way toward the ugly bruises she has on her body. Shadow lifts her hand, brushing her fingers over the scars gently and slowly. "All given by that devil..." She shakes her head, snapping back to reality. 

Heaving a sigh, she grabs the black outfit that was formal enough for their boring party. She rolls her eyes at the thought of meeting people. 

______

Jungkook runs downstairs, stumbling on his feet. "Ow!" He hisses when his foot hits the wall. "Kook? Where are you going......"

Mrs. Jung questions eyeing her son up and down. "Why are you wearing this...this formal clothes?"

Jungkook smiles slowly walking towards his mom. "I'm going to a party with my friend—it's related to business. Also, how am I looking?" Mrs. Jung chuckles looking at her son who was flexing his non-existence muscles. 

Mrs. Jung walks towards Jungkook with teary eyes. She cups his face in her soft hands as she smiles with proudness. "You're looking so handsome, my baby." Jungkook chuckles, throwing his head back. "Mom! Not again."

"I'm sorry I just got emotional. You have grown up...how big you are now." *beep beep*

Jungkook pursed his lips, raising his hand to wipe her mom's tears gently. "Don't cry, Mrs. Jung. Your son wants to see you always smiling, not crying. Now put a smile on your pretty face, my beautiful lady." Mrs. Jung chuckles, admiring her son.

"Yes, just like that. And I have to go, mom. Take care. I love you! See you soon." His lips stretch in a smile as he kisses her forehead and says goodbye.

Jungkook walks outside in hurry. He pushes open the door and his mouth hangs open at the sight.

What is she wearing? Hm, we will see in the next chapter

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