Saudade

" What do you think creates- Starts. What do you think starts these thoughts? Can you tell me that?" Mrs. Sara asked. Mrs. Sara was my therapist. A tall, beautiful lady with curly black hair and a big comforting smile.

The therapist office was.... A faux comforting environment. It was trying to be as inviting and homey as possible. The waxy smell of pine and cedar wood wafted through the sterile smelling air trying to drive your attention away from whatever problems you were there to solve.

I sat atop of a grey plush yet stiff couch. Curled my knees to my chest as I stared at the floor.

" I don't know. I can't really pin point it. Sometimes it's just.... Comes out. And then I spiral. It's like a storm... or a hurricane. I feel like I'm loosing control. It's always been like this ever since I was a kid." I explain hugging my knees closer to myself. I essentially coddled myself in a fake hug, pretending to be held in comfort.

" I see.... I'm sorry you had to go through that. It must've been hard REDACTED." She speaks solemnly

Wait- no-

There it is again.

Why isn't she saying my name?

I remember this memory. Why isn't she saying my name??? My name-

What-

What is my name?!

No, no, no, no, no!

My head shot up looking directly at her ' Face'. There stood tall was a contorted face. Her dark skin began to contort her features into a blank canvas.

Wait-?!

What's her face???

I can't remember her face??!

It's okay.... Make something up!

W-What??

No! No!

This can't be happening!

????????????

NOT AGAIN-

NO

I REFUSE

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Hi readers! Thanks for clicking on. Just a heads up. This will not be a a strictly updated fanfic. I'm doing this just out of boredom❤️❤️ Also this fanfic explores a lot of dark themes. If you aren't comfortable with that then you can click off 💕 This is going to be a KNY fanfic. This one is going to be fem reader, and yes I will be making a seperate ver for male and NB. Anyways love you please remember to eat, drink some water, go outside and get some sleep!! ❤️❤️❤️

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