Chp 20: The journal and the feast
I couldn't find any peace lying down, as thoughts of Sarah and James' possible actions kept racing through my mind. I needed to clear my head. Despite the rain, I decided to go for a run. I put my hood on, hands in pockets, and began to walk. As I walked, my bad thoughts slowly dissipated, and my feet began to move faster. I was soon out of breath, but I kept running.
The raindrops were hitting my face, but I didn't care. I was lost in my thoughts, and the only thing that mattered was running. Running gave me a sense of freedom that I couldn't find anywhere else. As I kept running, my mind became clearer, and I felt more in control of my thoughts. The rain was coming down harder, but I didn't stop. I ran until I was completely out of breath, and my legs felt like jelly. Finally, I stopped and took a deep breath, feeling refreshed and rejuvenated.
I looked around and realized that I had run quite a distance. I was in an unfamiliar area, but I didn't feel lost. In fact, I felt more connected to my surroundings than ever before. The rain had stopped, and the sun was starting to peek through the clouds. I took a moment to enjoy the tranquility and the beauty of the world around me. It was as if the world had come alive after the rain, and I was a part of it. I felt a sense of calm that I hadn't felt in a long time. I decided to walk back to the hotel, taking my time to appreciate the world around me.
As I walked back to the hotel, I felt more at peace with myself than I had in a long time. I had been so consumed by thoughts of Sarah and James that I had forgotten to take care of myself. Running had given me the chance to clear my mind and focus on my own well-being.
When I arrived back at the hotel, I felt reinvigorated and ready to face whatever lay ahead. I went to my room and took a long shower, washing away the sweat and grime of my run. I felt refreshed and renewed.
After my shower, I went to the hotel's restaurant for some to eat. I ordered some coffee and a wrap and sat down to enjoy my meal. As I ate, I thought about what my next move would be. I knew that I needed to check on Sarah,
Just then, my phone buzzed. It was a message from Sarah.
"I'm alright just woke up from a nap, how are you doing? Are you alright "
I breathed a sigh of relief and felt the weight of worry lift from my shoulders.
"I'm alright now, after hearing you feel better "I text back.
She didn't reply, but I could tell that she was feeling bashful.
"I'm at the restaurant, do you want me to get you something ?" I text again.
She instantly replied "No thanks for asking though "
Despite her insistence that she didn't want anything, I knew I had to do something to show her how much I appreciated her. I couldn't resist doing something for her. So, I ordered a cheese lettuce croissant, its her favourite. As I waited for the delivery to arrive, I couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement. This small gesture could mean the world to her. It could be the start of something new for us, but I hope it shows her how much she means to me.
Now, I could relax and enjoy my meal.
When the croissant finally arrived, I knew I had to deliver it to her myself. As I walked up to her door, my heart pounding with anticipation, I couldn't help but feel nervous. What if she didn't like it? What if she thought it was too much? But as she opened the door and saw the croissant, a smile spread across her face.
'Thank you so much,' she said, taking the croissant from my hands. 'You really didn't have to do this.'
"But I wanted to," I replied, feeling a sense of relief wash over me. 'I just wanted to show you how much I care.'
And in that moment, I knew that our friendship was stronger than ever. It was the little things that mattered, the small gestures that showed how much we cared. And I knew that, no matter what, we would always be there for each other.
She took the croissant from my hands and thanked me with a smile.
We sat down at the the table, and I poured us each a cup of coffee. As we ate and talked, I felt a sense of warmth and comfort.
"I had been worried sick when you went missing, and I had prayed for your safe return , though I don't believe in god, but i had a hope if I ask him he'll make me find you" I say looking into her eyes.
"I'm so grateful that you were thinking of me and hoping for my safety.It means a lot to me to Jake ."
I felt butterflies when she said my name.
"Even if you don't believe in God, I think it's important to hold onto hope and positivity, especially in difficult times. Thank you for being there for me, and for never giving up on me."she says after a pause.
As we continued to talk, I shared with her
"James has been struggling with anxiety and depression. It been like he's been through a lot, and I can only imagine how difficult it must be for him."
I told her how he had found ways to cope with them. He was sent to another school for his behaviour and people here use to bully him he was also in rehab for some years. But he seemed to be lost again otherwise he would never take a step to abduct you.
Though she felt uncomfortable on the thought of James she shifts on her chair but tried to listen to me with interest, and I could see the hope and strength returning to her eyes.
"As for what happened, I'm still trying to make sense of it all. It's a complicated situation for me and I'm still processing my feelings about it. I appreciate your support and understanding, though." She replies taking a sip of her coffee
"mental health issues are complex and can be hard to manage, even with the best of intentions" I assured her that james will be taken care for what he did to her.
We talked for hours, sharing our stories and our wisdom, and I knew that our friendship was stronger than ever. Sometimes, it takes a crisis to bring people closer together, and I was grateful for the depth and beauty of our connection.
As we finished eating , she turned to me with a serious expression. "I know I said I didn't want anything,' she said, 'but I have something for you too.'
She handed me a small package wrapped in brown paper, and I opened it to find a beautiful journal. "I know how much you love to write," she said, 'and I've seen you writing something many times so wanted to give you something that would inspire you."
I felt tears prickling at the corners of my eyes. It was such a thoughtful and generous gift, and it meant more to me than she could ever know. "Thank you so much," I said, feeling a sense of gratitude and love. 'This means everything to me.'
I hugged the journal tightly, like a kid and I knew than our friendship was stronger than ever. We had shown each other how much we cared, And in that moment, I knew that nothing could ever come between us."
After a few minutes of chatting, Uzma and Umar joined us and we all started talking. We reminisced about old times and shared our latest updates with each other. Uzma told us about their relationship and Umar talked about his recent travels. We also discussed our plans for the upcoming weekend. After a while, I had to excuse myself and headed back to my room. It was a great time catching up with them.
As soon as I entered the room, I couldn't wait to open the journal that Sarah gave me. I had been looking forward to this moment since she gave me . I sat down on my bed, took a deep breath, and opened the journal. The pages were blank, waiting for me to fill them with my thoughts.
I felt a rush of excitement as I picked up my pen and began to write. As I wrote in my journal, my thoughts kept drifting back to Sarah. I couldn't help but think about how much I liked her. I admired her intelligence, her kindness, and her sense of humor.
I remembered the way her eyes sparkled when she laughed and the way her smile lit up the room. I thought about all the times we had spent together, talking and laughing and enjoying each other's company.
As I sat down to write in my journal, my mind kept drifting back to Sarah. I couldn't help but think about how much I liked her. I admired her intelligence, her kindness, and her sense of humor.
I knew that I had to tell her how I felt, but I was afraid of what might happen. What if she didn't feel the same way? What if I ruined our friendship? But I couldn't keep my feelings hidden any longer. I've told her I like her but is this love.
I took a deep breath and began to write. "Dear Journal," I wrote, "Sarah is amazing," She's smart, funny, and beautiful. I can't stop thinking about her. I want to be with her, but I'm afraid to tell her how I feel. What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if I ruin everything?" I don't know how to say this, but I think I'm in love with Sarah. I know it sounds crazy, but I can't help the way I feel. I feel like I can be myself around her, and that's something I've never felt before."
As I wrote, I felt a sense of relief wash over me. It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I knew that I still had to talk to Sarah, but at least I had taken the first step.
I closed my journal and sat back, feeling both nervous and excited. I knew that telling Sarah I was in love would be one of the hardest things I had ever done, but I also knew that it was something I had to do. I just hoped that she felt the same way.but I also didn't want to keep my feelings hidden.
As I sat there, lost in thought, I knew that I had a big decision to make. Would I take a chance and tell Sarah how I felt, or would I keep my feelings to myself and risk losing her forever?
After writing I felt a sense of peace and clarity wash over me.
It was as if the journal had unlocked a part of my mind that I had never accessed before. I wrote until the sun set and the stars came out. I wrote until my hand ached and my eyes grew tired. And when I was finished, I closed the journal and smiled to myself.
I knew that this journal would become a treasured possession, something that I would keep with me always. It was a reminder of the power of writing, the power of self-expression, and the power of connection.
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