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SECRETS

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Sophie stared through the peephole as she watched Kai on the other side, his gaze firmly fixed on the door. She felt paralyzed, her mind blanking as she struggled to remember how to move. The doorbell rang again and she instinctively took a step back.

"Fuck," she muttered under her breath as she willed herself to stay quiet. Maybe if she waited long enough, he'd give up and leave.

But then his voice broke through the silence. "Sophie, I know you're in there."

Her shoulders slumped in defeat. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, Sophie unlocked the door and swung it open, meeting his gaze head-on for the first time in what felt like a lifetime.

Their eyes locked and Sophie took in his appearance, practically ovulating when she did. He wore a dark beanie that allowed strands of his blue hair to peek out, paired with a band t-shirt, worn jeans, and a long cardigan that made him look effortlessly put-together and somehow even more attractive than she remembered.

Kai's eyes roamed over her, his gaze slid down her frame in a way that made her feel exposed. She glanced down, suddenly aware she was standing there in just a tank top and underwear. Her cheeks flushed as she looked back up, wide- eyed.

"Are you just gonna stand there, or are you gonna let me in?"

"Right, yeah." Sophie stammered, stepping aside for him to come in. She hugged her arms around herself, trying to ignore the heat that rose as she watched him cross the threshold.

"I came by three years ago, but you weren't here," Kai mentioned, his gaze sweeping over the walls and furniture.

Sophie shut the door, turning to face him. She wiped her clammy hands on her thighs, trying to keep her voice steady. "Yeah, I, uh... I was staying with my dad for a while. I came back two years ago."

Kai's eyes finally locked onto hers. "Didn't want to stop by and let anyone know?"

"It had been so long, I didn't think it would matter."

Kai let out a low hum as he seemed to weigh her answer, saying nothing but speaking volumes with his silence.

Suddenly aware of her barely-there outfit, Sophie forced a casual tone. "I'm gonna put pants on."

Kai's mouth tugged into a faint smile, his eyes following her as she slipped past him. She hurried into her bedroom and ducked into the closet. Looking down, she realized her hands were shaking. She flexed her fingers, taking a deep breath, trying to calm herself.

Steeling herself, Sophie reached down and grabbed a pair of shorts from the floor, shimmying into them with clumsy fingers. But just as she started to pull herself together, she heard muffled voices drifting in from the living room. Her heart plummeted. Micah.

Sophie's eyes went wide as she remembered her son—their son—was home, completely unaware of the man now sitting in their living room. She rushed out of the bedroom, and rounded the corner, bracing herself. Kai sat casually on the couch, leaning slightly forward as he listened to Micah talk with an amused smile.

Anxiety flooded her body, her chest tight as if the walls themselves were closing in. She could barely process the scene in front of her.

"I like your hair," Micah complimented with a grin, reaching up and brushing a piece of Kai's blue hair with his small fingers.

Kai let out a chuckle. "Thanks, kid. It actually used to look like yours."

Despite the dread gnawing in her stomach, watching them interact made Sophie's heartache. This was the first time they'd met—father and son—yet the connection between them felt unsettlingly natural. Sophie cleared her throat, pulling their attention back to her, her nerves fraying with every second they spent together.

"Your friend is really cool, Mama," Micah stated, flashing her a wide smile. Sophie's gaze flicked to Kai, who held her with a look that said he understood much more than he was letting on.

"Hey, baby," Sophie tilted her head. "You mind going back to your video games for a minute so I can talk to my friend?"

Micah's face dropped slightly. "It's not working," he replied with a small pout. "I came out here to see if you could help me."

Kai's eyes shifted back to Micah. "I can take a look at it for you,"

"Oh, Kai, you don't have to..." Sophie trailed off, instinctively shaking her head.

Kai rose to his full height. "It won't take long."

Sophie watched him, unsure but took a steadying breath and nodded. "Okay."

With a small nod, Kai looked back down at Micah. "Where to?"

"This way," Micah chirped, tugging Kai down the hallway and into his bedroom. Sophie squeezed her eyes shut, gathering her thoughts before quietly trailing after them.

"Your mom got you a pretty sick setup here," Kai commented, eyeing the neatly organized flick games and the small TV stand before bending down by the Xbox. After a few adjustments, the consoleered to life.

"Thank you!" Micah's face lit up as he snatched the controller.

"No problem." Kai rested a hand briefly on Micah's shoulder before standing back up. "I'm gonna go talk to your mom for a bit, okay?"

"Okay, bye," Micah mumbled, his focus already on the screen as he settled into his game.

Kai turned, his gaze meeting Sophie's as she hovered nervously in the doorway. She gestured down the hall, and they moved to the dining table in silence. They both sat and she felt every unspoken word lingering between them, filling the space with questions neither knew quite how to start asking.

"Six years old, huh?" Kai tilted his head as if he'd already pieced everything together.

Sophie's stomach twisted. "Yeah... he turns seven in June."

Kai's eyes narrowed slightly. "Where's his dad?"

Sophie braced herself, crossing her arms and leaning back. "What did Winter tell you?"

"Doesn't matter," he said, leaning in, his gaze never wavering. "I want to hear it from you."

She bit the inside of her cheek, silently cursing herself for that drunken slip-up with Winter. Her eyes darted around, looking everywhere but at him, until his voice cut through her defenses once more.

"Is he mine?" Kai's tone was quiet, but his question landed heavily.

She took a shaky breath as her gaze flickered to the hallway, ensuring Micah was still encrossed in his game before she looked back at Kai. "Yes,"

Kai's expression barely shifted, confirming he'd suspected the answer all along. Still, the tension in his jaw made her nervous. Winter was definitely getting an earful later.

"You didn't think to tell me I have a kid?" he asked, his voice deceptively calm.

Sophie held his stare, taking a moment to respond. "You left, Kai. I was nineteen. In my mind, it wouldn't even matter if I told you."

"Look, I know it was selfish, keeping him from you, from your family. But you broke my heart when you left, and I couldn't handle that kind of rejection again. Not with him in the picture."

Kai sat silently as he processed her words. Slowly, he reached over, his hand settling gently on her thigh. "If you had told me, I would have been there for you. For him. No questions asked."

Sophie looked away, tears stinging the corners of her eyes. "I didn't want to interfere with your future," she whispered. Yale was a big deal, and I didn't want you to hate me."

Kai pulled his hand away, his arms resting on his knees as he leaned forward, fingers interlocked. "What if I hate you now?"

"I considered that too. Believe me, I considered everything," Sophie explained. "It was just easier."

"You were scared."

She nodded, taking a shaky breath. "Yeah... I was. But when I came back, things were... different. I had just finished school, and then I had to take care of my mom on top of Micah. I was lucky enough to get hired at the elementary school here, and everything was just so chaotic, so busy. It wasn't even a main concern anymore."

Sophie crossed her leg over the other, her hands fidgeting in her lap, trying to piece together the words she had kept buried for so long.

Kai remained still, absorbing every word. He hadn't interrupted once, just listened.

"That part of my life... it was so far away from me," Sophie continued. "Until I saw you on the news. And then, by some godforsaken chance, I ran into Winter. And now... here we are."

Sophie didn't realize how much it had been eating at her until she felt the tension in her chest start to ease and the knot in her stomach unwound, a strange sense of relief creeping in as she let go of the years of silence.

Kai didn't say anything, just nodded slightly.

"Do you? Hate me, I mean?"

Kai took a long moment to respond. His lips parted as if to say something, but then he simply exhaled a quiet breath. "No,"

Her shoulders dropped from their tense position at the admission.

"Are you going to allow me to be a part of his life?"

Sophie hesitated, her mind racing through the possibilities. She thought of Micah's questions and how she had always known that one day she'd have to answer for the absence of the man who had a claim on his heart.

She exhaled slowly, meeting Kai's gaze. "He's been asking about his dad a lot, and I know it bothers him that he doesn't know you. So, if you are serious about being his father, then... yes." She rose to her feet as her expression turned stern. "But if you hurt him... I will genuinely fucking kill you."

Kai's eyes darkened slightly as he rose to his full height, his frame towering over hers. They were close now, mere inches apart but Sophie didn't back down. Her eyes stayed locked on him, challenging and resolute.

"If I do, then I'll let you,"

She nodded, accepting his answer. "I'll talk to him about it."

As soon as those words left her lips, Sophie became acutely aware of how close they were, the heat of his body radiating toward hers. She swallowed hard, forcing her thoughts back to the present, away from the rush of memories and desires that clouded her mind.

"I need a drink," she murmured, stepping away from him, needing the space to breathe. She moved to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of wine. "Do you want a drink?"

"I have some stuff to take care of," Kai declined, his gaze following her as she moved.

Sophie nodded and popped the cork off the wine bottle, pouring herself a glass.

"Let me know whenever you talk to Micah,"

"Yeah, of course," Sophie responded before she raised the glass to her lips, her gaze not quite meeting him, though she could feel his eyes on her. She lowered the glass after a sip, licking her lips, then added, " Do you need my number?"

Kai shook his head. "I'll get it from Winter."

"Okay," She motioned toward the door, walking over to it. "I'll walk you out."

She tried to keep her composure as she opened the door, but Kai stopped just inches in front of her. She lifted her eyes to meet him, watching him cautiously as he reached up. His thumb brushed across her cheek, the touch so soft and familiar it felt like a ghost of another life, another version of them that had never come to pass.

Sophie stood frozen, the world spinning around her as if she'd forgotten how to breathe altogether.

"I'll text you." Kai stated before removing his hand.

Her hand gripped the door frame as she watched him step outside. "See you," she managed to say.

Kai turned, looking back over his shoulder with a small, almost imperceptible smile, waving before he turned away and walked down the steps.

She waved back, but as soon as he disappeared from her sight, Sophie closed the door quietly, leaning her back against it.

She had played out every possible scenario in her head—every possible way he might react, every word she could say to him. And somehow, it had gone better than she had expected.

He wanted to be a father to Micah. He wanted to be in their lives, even after everything.

But as much as Sophie felt a rush of relief, a part of her ached. The same familiar fears, the same old feelings from before began to rise in her chest. She closed her eyes, trying to push it away, but she couldn' t ignore it. The feelings she had buried for so long, the unresolved hurt, the scars from before, all of it was still there.

She had let herself hope. And that hope, she realized, could hurt just as much as the fear.

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"So, um..." Sophie began as she placed her plate down and pulled out the chair beside Micah. "You know how you've been wondering about your dad?"

Micah didn't look up at first, too busy stuffing a forkful of mac and cheese into his mouth. "Mhm."

Sophie sat across from him, taking a deep breath before she continued. "Well, if you had the option... would you want to get to know him?"

Micah paused, his fork halfway to his mouth as he set it down slowly, considering her question. He tilted his head, his brow furrowing. "Are we talking about your friend?"

Sophie stared at him, her eyes wide with surprise. "I'm gonna need you to elaborate."

Micah sighed, a long exhale that was exaggerated and yet somehow sincere. His eyes met hers for a moment, rolling slightly as if he had been waiting for her to catch up. "Mama, you only have two friends. Ms. Harper and Uncle Nicky."

Sophie's mouth parted in mock offense. "Your point?"

"He said you knew each other from a long time ago and you were acting really weird around him, so it was pretty obvious." He shrugged nonchalantly.

"You are too smart for your own good sometimes," she finally managed, shaking her head in disbelief.

"I know," Micah said with a grin, clearly pleased with himself, before returning to his meal.

"Well?" she prompted gently. "How do you feel about it? And before you answer, I want you to know that... he wants to know you."

"He seems nice," Micah said thoughtfully, his gaze drifting as he considered. "I think I'd like to get to know him too. Maybe we can invite him to the fair this weekend?"

Sophie nodded, forcing a calm smile even as a wave of anxiety crept over her. "That's a really good idea."

A comfortable silence settled between them before Micah broke it with a quiet question. "Did you love him?"

Sophie hesitated for a moment, the question catching her off guard. She set down her fork, taking a breath as she gathered her thoughts, searching for the right words. "Um, yeah... I guess I did."

"Did he love you?" Micah pressed, his big blue eyes watching her.

"I don't know..." she admitted, her voice quiet. "I wish I could answer that."

Micah leaned back in his chair, taking a moment to chew thoughtfully before speaking again. "I think he did."

"Why do you say that?" she asked, genuinely curious.

"Because you're a good person," Micah explained as if it were the simplest truth in the world. "And I love you a lot, so it doesn't make sense for anyone else not to think the same."

Sophie felt a lump form in her throat as her heart swelled with affection. "What'd I do to deserve you?"

"I ask myself that every day."

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