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𝗥𝗜𝗦𝗞

CHAPTER SIXTEEN
you won't believe half the things
I see inside my head, wait till you
see half the things that haven't
happened yet

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REAL LIFE

MARY JANE DECIDED that instead of them just getting breakfast from somewhere for Tina's birthday, she would just make it instead. Which, considering cooking for others was definitely one of her love languages, made sense. Both to show her appreciation to Tina, since she was probably one of the best people Mary Jane had come to know, but also as a thanks for inviting her to her birthday party in the first place.

She stood by the stove in the kitchen in her pajamas, still with her hair braided, staring down at the pancakes in the pan. Numerous other ones were already on a plate, surrounded by bowls of fruits and numerous toppings she had set out. The house was quiet, everyone evidently still asleep and / or getting ready for the — admittedly long day — they had ahead of them. All Mary Jane could hear was the sound of pancakes being made, and supernatural being played through the headphone she had in.

Two hands were suddenly placed on her shoulders. Mary Jane jumped slightly from the sudden contact, turning around to see who it was. Of course, it was none other than Ellum, looking quite smug from the fact that he snuck up on her. Mary Jane rolled her eyes — fondly, duh — before shaking her head in disbelief. Ellum chuckled a bit, sliding in to stand next to her. His arm brushed against her shoulder, and Mary Jane felt her face heat up just from that. Unbelievable.

"Morning, MJane," Ellum said. "You're up early."

She flipped another pancake. "I could say the same thing about you. I didn't wake you, did I?"

"Nah, you're good." He then glanced over at the assortment of food she had set out. "You did all of this?"

Mary Jane shrugged casually. "I told y'all that I loved to cook, especially for other people. Besides, Tina deserves it." She took the pancake off of the pan and placed it on top of the stack on the plate. "Obviously, I made them for Tina, but I'm making enough for everyone. Help yourself."

He took one of the spare plates before looking down at her so intently it made her stomach feel weird. "You're amazing, you know that?"

Mary Jane's voice was suddenly very small, her heart beating fast against her chest. "Because I made pancakes?"

"No — well, yes. It's more so the fact that you're incredibly caring. And for a million other reasons as well."

Her eyes narrowed, doing her very best to ignore her mind screaming at everything he just said. "Don't tell me you're trying to flatter me, Josh."

Ellum tilted his head slightly. "What do you mean? That's all I try to do."

Mary Jane rolled her eyes again, elbowing him in his side — but was he flirting with her? "Stop it. Don't be silly."

"I'm not being silly," Ellum insisted. "I'm being truthful." He elbowed her back. "Accept my compliment, come on."

"Oh, hey," a chipper voice greeted from behind them.

Mary Jane spun around, snapping herself out of her thoughts and from her and Ellum's own little world. None other than Tina, the birthday girl herself, was standing there in the doorway to the kitchen. She instantly smiled wide at the sight of her and how she looked extremely cute in her birthday outfit.

"Oh, there she is," Mary Jane said, extending her arms out to her side. "Happy TinaCon!"

Tina squealed excitedly as she ran up to her, eagerly accepting her hug. "Oh, thank you." She kept Mary Jane embraced as she looked at the assortment of food on the counter. "What is all of this?"

"Birthday breakfast," Mary Jane exclaimed, swaying her and Tina together slightly in their hug. "Just for you."

Tina's eyes widened. "A birthday breakfast for me? That you made?" She pressed their heads together a little more. "Oh, Mary Jane, I do not deserve you."

"Anything for you, Tina."

Mary Jane's eyes caught on Ellum's as he sat down on one of the stools in the kitchen, a plate full of pancakes. He gave her a gentle smile, one that made warmth spread throughout her entire body. Mary Jane gave one back for a moment before telling Tina about the pancakes and how long it took to make them. However, throughout it all, she could feel Ellum's gaze on the side of her face, almost as if it burned. She couldn't take her mind off of it, and it was making her start to stutter over her words.

God, she needed a shot.

＊*•♥̩͙•̩̩͙*˚˚*•♥̩͙•̩̩͙*˚＊＊*•̩̩͙♥̩͙•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙♥•̩̩͙*˚＊

REAL LIFE

IF THERE WAS one thing for certain, it was that Mary Jane was completely drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar.

Tina knew how to throw a party. A lot of people were at the house, milling around both inside and outside with drinks in their hands. There was chalk art outside on the basketball court, along with a pen of farm animals that Tina had shown on her stream quickly. Mary Jane, clad in a white cropped shirt with ripped jeans and her classic red lip, sauntered around the party, meeting a shit ton of new people that were associated with Tina and the friend group.

Well, she was drunk, quite literally. The alcohol in her system had definitely kicked in, making her feel all light and buzzy. But, as cliche as it sounded, she was definitely also drunk on the feeling of being surrounded by her friends. Every time she turned a corner, and no matter where she went, she knew that there would be some familiar face. Although, she had to admit, she had been spending most of her time with Ellum — which, being the social butterfly he was, was introducing her to practically everyone.

Over the course of the party, Mary Jane had lost him, allowing him to branch out to talk to people while she also talked to people. However, she could still know he was around, due to him towering over everyone and his very distinct voice. However, it was about a couple of hours into the party when she noticed that he had been missing for a while. No glimpse of him inside, no glimpse of him outside, no British accent or loud laughter. It was like he just vanished, which for him was hard to do. So, naturally, Mary Jane got a bit concerned.

Mary Jane excused herself from a conversation with Thio — or Thor, a streamer that most of them had met through GTA. Clutching onto her drink, she brushed past numerous people, including Luna who was in the midst of a conversation with Quackity that involved a lot of laughter from what she could tell. Mary Jane went out into the hallway, where it was a bit less crowded and a little more quiet. She glanced around for a moment, only to see Ellum sitting at the top of the staircase by himself.

Tilting her head slightly at him, she walked up the stairs to join him, Pink Pony Club playing from the speakers in the kitchen getting drowned out slightly. Mary Jane stopped at the top of the stairs next to him, and Ellum looked from her Converse up to her face. She smiled softly at him for a moment, and Ellum responded with a small smile as well.

"Hey," Mary Jane greeted, sitting down next to him so that their shoulders pressed into each other. She tucked her knees up a bit, placing her drink beside her and wrapping her arms around her legs. "What are you doing up here all by yourself?"

Ellum sighed slightly. "My social battery kind of died. So, I'm just . . . hiding for a bit."

"Everybody needs to recharge every once in a while, even the most personable people." Mary Jane then reached out and patted his knees. "Well, I'll leave you alone to do that, then."

"No," Ellum protested, grabbing her hand and holding it tight to stop it from her from going anywhere. "You can stay."

Mary Jane paused for a second — partly from his words, and partly from how her mind was short circuiting from him holding her hand again. "Oh. You sure?"

"One hundred percent." He squeezed her hand a little, yet didn't let go. "How's your party experience been? You doing okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good," Mary Jane replied, even though she was totally not good because why was he still holding her hand and why couldn't she find it in herself to let it go? "I was just talking to Thio until I noticed you were missing and came to find you."

He raised his eyebrows slightly. "So you were worried about me, is what you're saying?"

Mary Jane's face flushed as red as her lips. "You can't exactly blame me for being a tiny bit concerned when a six-five man with a British accent suddenly disappears for a while in the middle of a party. Excuse me for being worried."

"No, I appreciate it. Thank you. I'd do the same if you disappeared."

She nodded slightly before peeking over the side of the staircase at all of the people in the house. "You know, they probably think that we just escaped the party to hang out with each other."

"They wouldn't be wrong, exactly," Ellum responded. "Especially when I'm trying to recharge, there's nobody I would rather hang out with than you."

Her smile slightly grew, and she looked ahead shyly. "When I said no place I'd rather be, I meant it." She then paused for a second. "Besides maybe back home with Luna, which is saying a lot."

"Do you miss North Carolina?"

"I mean, it's home, so yeah. But I've been enjoying my time in LA a lot." She glanced over at him for a second. "You know, my flight back home was supposed to be tomorrow."

His eyes widened a little. "You were supposed to leave tomorrow?"

"I was," Mary Jane confirmed. "My original plan was to get here, do promo, be there for Tina's party, and then leave. But . . . I cancelled my flight."

Ellum's face brightened up instantly at the news, interlocking their fingers together in excitement. "You're staying?"

"I'm staying."

"For how long?"

She shrugged. "I'm not sure. Until everyone gets sick of me and tells me to leave, I guess."

Ellum chuckled a little. "That won't happen. Especially since everyone's moving out soon."

"Oh, right." Mary Jane looked over at him fully. "You're going back to the UK soon, I presume?"

"Yeah. I don't really want to, though."

"You do seem happier here," Mary Jane noted, her heart aching. "I'm sorry you have to go so far away."

"Yeah," Ellum agreed. "I just don't want to leave my friends . . ." He paused for a moment, looking at her intently. "Leave you."

So, honestly, Mary Jane had no fucking clue what came over her in that moment of time. Maybe it was the fact that he just said he didn't want to leave her, or that they were staring at each other, or that their hands were still tightly interlocked, or that it was the alcohol giving her courage, or that or that Fortnight was playing from the speakers in the kitchen, but she swore something in her brain broke.

Mary Jane reached up her other hand, lifting it up to touch Ellum's face. Ellum kept his eyes on her, even leaning slightly into her touch. Before Mary Jane could even think about what she was doing, she was already leaning in, almost as if he was the other side of a magnet drawing her in. It was like she couldn't stop at all, all rational thoughts out the window. Ellum leaned in slightly as well, his eyes flickering down from her eyes to her lips. They met in the middle, and Mary Jane pressed her lips onto his.

And . . . fireworks. Mary Jane honestly felt like she was about to absolutely spontaneously combust just from the feeling. However, before anything more can happen after that, a loud crash came from the kitchen. Mary Jane instantly pulled back from Ellum, her head turning in the direction of the noise.

"My bad," Tina called. "I dropped something and it spilled."

"You had to be good for one," Noah told her.

"It's your birthday, it doesn't matter!" Luna exclaimed.

Mary Jane blinked a couple of times, trying to regain her senses as she looked at Ellum. She suddenly realized what position she was in right now. Her hand was still on his face while her other one was still holding his, they were sitting so close that their bodies were pressed up against each other, and Ellum had a slight smudge of red lipstick on the corner of his mouth.

I love you, it's ruining my life.

Oh my fucking God. What the hell had she just done? Why did she do that? Just out of nowhere? No thoughts, head empty? This wasn't good, this was so not good.

"Um . . ." Mary Jane trailed off. "My bad." She cleared her throat, her hand dropping from his face and slipping out of his. "Sorry."

Ellum watched her for a moment, seemingly coming out of a daze. "Sorry? For what?"

Mary Jane felt panic rise up inside of her, and she honestly felt like she couldn't breathe at all as she stood up from the stair. "No, I'm — I'm so sorry. I shouldn't — I shouldn't have done that. I don't know what came over me."

He straightened up a little. "MJane, wait—"

She didn't let him say anything else. All Mary Jane knew was that she had to get out of there, away from him, because ruining everything with him was way too much for her to handle right now. Leaving both him and her drink behind, she raced down the steps. Vaguely, she could hear him call her name and how his footsteps were following her, but she ignored it. Mary Jane pushed past the groups of people in the house, going by the living room, where Blau was doing a very . . . interesting rendition of Teenage Dream while Meena laughed at him.

Mary Jane continued to push through people, her chest feeling tight and her mind feeling frazzled and her eyes burning with tears that were threatening to fall, until she reached the stairs to go down to the basement. She rushed down the steps, her chest heaving up and down, and rushed into Tina's room. Mary Jane shut the door behind her and pressed her back to it. She placed a hand on her chest as if it would make it easier to breathe as she slid all the way down to the floor.

And — for the first time in a while — Mary Jane finally let herself fall apart.

-ˏˋ ✩✩✩ ˊˎ-

surprise! happy bonus update! I just felt like things were going wayyyy too slow so here's an update for today along with one on friday :) I've been grinding out chapters so hopefully this will happen more often <3

luna 🤝 mj
kissing people then panicking and running away to cry

for whatever reason while writing how mj runs away I had the that's so true bridge playing in my head . . . like her pushing her way through everyone as "made it out alive, but I think I lost it, said that I was fine, said it from my coffin, remember how I died when you started walking? that's my life" playing? CINEMA

THEY'RE SO I CAN SEE YOU CODED STOPPPPPP