❝𝚆𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚐𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚜,
𝚂𝚘 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚐𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚔𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚒𝚝?
𝚂𝚎𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚜 𝚊 𝚠𝚎𝚊𝚔𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜,
𝚂𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎,
𝙱𝚘𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚞𝚙 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚝.
𝙲𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚘𝚗, 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚠𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚗𝚘𝚠?❞
𝚆𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝙱𝚢 𝚆𝚘𝚕𝚟𝚎𝚜 – 𝚂𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚜

"What the hell are you doing?"

That was Rory, Dylan's triplet, barging into his room.

"Dying," Dylan replied.

At least, that's what he wanted to do.

Rory came over and yanked down the blankets covering Dylan.

It was a good thing he didn't sleep naked, because he wore regular basketball shorts and a black long sleeve shirt.

"Well, stop dying and get up," Rory said. "We're going to be late for school."

"Oh no," Dylan deadpanned and rolled over in bed, trying to fall back asleep.

He either slept too little or too much – there was never any in between.

Along with his erratic sleeping schedule, he also had an erratic eating schedule – some days he wouldn't eat because he wasn't hungry and some days he felt like he could eat his weight in food.

There had to be something wrong with him.

"Fine," Rory said. "You leave me no choice but to get the scissors so I can cut your hair."

In Dylan's opinion, the only two nicest things that their dad, Christopher, had ever given Dylan was Christopher's blond hair and Dylan's two sisters, Rory and Christy (since they were triplets).

"Fine, I'm up," Dylan said, sitting up.

Rory smiled smugly and left the room.

Dylan had been growing his hair out since January and Rory knew that his hair was a bit sacred to him, so threatening to cut his hair (or shaving him bald like Lorelai liked to threaten to do him in the middle of the night) was a low-blow and they knew it.

Only Christy never threatened him like that; maybe stapling his dick to the wall sure, but never threatening to cut his hair.

So, Dylan put on some pants (he was sure that hadn't been washed in a week) and grabbed a jacket and his backpack.

He went downstairs where Rory was. She was wearing an oversized sweater. Rory handed him some Pop Tarts, "Here. You missed breakfast."

Dylan wasn't hungry, but he took the Pop Tarts anyway, just to make Rory happy to see him eat something, even though it'll probably end up getting smashed in his backpack.

Then he and Rory were out the door. Rory went to walk with Lane, leaving Dylan to walk to school alone. It was fine, even though he hated being alone. Being alone meant that the thoughts would take over; thoughts telling him what he already knew.

Thoughts like: his family would be better off without him and his family really don't love him.

Christy was probably with her friends, Lydia Danes and Kayla Williams.

He wanted to go back to bed. He wasn't an early bird like Rory or a night owl like Christy. He was always tired, like he was some kind of permanently exhausted pigeon.

"Hey, Dylan."

Dylan turned to look at the guy coming up to him. The guy had close-cropped dark blond hair and he was on the school hockey team. His name was Greg.

Greg was a closeted gay guy. At least, that's what Dylan assumed because Greg liked kissing him.

Dylan was bisexual. Ironically, he heard the term bisexual from an episode of Dawson's Creek that Christy was watching. Apparently it's where a person felt attraction to both genders. That was what Dylan was. Sure, he knew when he was younger that he likes both genders, but he felt like he had to choose. But now he knew it was a thing.

He hasn't come out yet. He didn't want his sisters and mother to look at him differently. He didn't want his friends, who were mainly guys, to grow uncomfortable with him.

So, him being bi was just another thing that he had to keep quiet about. He looked at his – fling? – make out partner? – they weren't anything serious, so Dylan can't call Greg a boyfriend. God knows why Greg would want him, besides Dylan being the only other (closeted) queer kid in town. "What's up?"

Greg asked, "After school, my place or your place?"

Dylan thought about it. His mom would be at the Independence Inn and his sisters would most likely be at their friends' places. He'll have the entire place to himself, that is, if his friends don't come over. "My place."

Greg walked away and Dylan continued on his way to school, coming across Alex Adams and Cecilia Jones.

A smile spread across Dylan's face as he spotted his two friends. Finally some people that he wanted to see. Maybe he should invite them over to hang out after school.

He stepped closer to them.

Oh, right. I forgot, thought Dylan, feeling his chest grow empty and he wanted to throw up, even though he hadn't eaten anything.

Cecilia and Alex were kissing against a tree.

Maybe he should go home, crawl under his blanket, sleep and never wake up.

He turned to head back home, but then Ricky Rosenberg came up to him, grinning.

"So I just got this idea..." Ricky started talking.

Dylan finished, That you want to kill me? But he couldn't say that. He didn't want to burden anyone with his problems, mostly because he didn't know what his problem was.

"What's your idea?" asked Dylan.

Sure, Jack and Cecilia may have formed the band, Burn the Witch!, but they weren't the leaders. Dylan may have been the lead singer, but he wasn't the band leader either. It went to Alex, who took over as leader.

He just knew what to do, something about him was magnetic. Dylan looked at Alex who was still kissing Cecilia–

No. He looked away. He had Greg. He tried to think about Greg instead. However, Greg was a boring, vanilla dude. Greg probably goes home to a bland spaghetti dinner and talks to his mother about his day. He looked at Ricky, who was looking at something.

Dylan followed Ricky's line of sight, spotting Christy, Lydia, and Kayla walking together.

Dylan almost sighed and looked at the clouds instead.

Does anyone love me?

Alex and Cecilia had finally gotten off each other when Mai and Coriander, or as he preferred to be called, Jack, St. James showed up.

Sure, Dylan (and by extension Rory and Christy) and Jack had known each other when they were younger since they're moms were friends, but Dylan and Jack couldn't exactly call each other best friends. That honor went to Cecilia. 

Cecilia and Jack had been best friends (platonic soul mates they both claim) since they were ten-years-old when Cecilia and her siblings moved to Stars Hollow.

Cecilia had a twin sister named Elena and they had a younger brother named Jeremy. Their parents had died in a car accident (the car accidentally drove off a bridge) in May. Jenna had managed to secure custody over them.

Alex had an older brother named Sam. Alex hated him and refused to talk about him, because when he was growing up, his parents compared him to Sam.

Ricky had a younger sister and an older sister.

Jack was the only child and so was Mai.

So, last year, Cecilia and Jack decided to start a band, something that Dylan decided to join in on for reasons that he still didn't know.

Cecilia was the guitarist and co-singer. Jack was the drummer. Alex was the bassist and occasional back-up singer. Dylan was just the lead singer and Ricky joined a few months ago as another guitarist.

Mai ended up taking the role as band leader, because she loved all types of metal despite being an argyle sweater and skirt wearing preppy girl. Mai had something going on with Jeremy.

Ricky and Alex seemed to be somewhat friends while Cecilia and Jack were best friends. Mai and Dylan never seemed to click with each other. Sure they hung out, but Dylan couldn't exactly call Mai a friend. They were more like acquaintances than friends.

Sure, Dylan hung out with them and was in a band with them, but he couldn't exactly think of them as friends, especially when his feelings seemed to grow beyond friendship towards Alex and Cecilia, who were dating. Sure, he had that brief crush on Jack.

He just needed to distance himself from Cecilia and Alex, hoping that his feelings will go away; hence him making out with Greg (which unfortunately, hasn't worked yet.)

After school, it's also a blur to Dylan, somehow he's getting straight As (he was considered moving up a grade, but he refused, wanting to graduate with his sisters), he waited by the Teen Hayride advertisement. He looked at it. He could go. It would be nice to get out of the house where his sisters and mother look at him sometimes like, "You're still here? Why are you here?"

In a slightly mocking tone, Alex asked, "Are you seriously considering going to that?"

"No," Dylan lied. He wondered why Alex was a dick to him, but then again, Alex was a dick to everyone, besides Cecilia. It was just that Dylan was Alex's favorite target. "Who wants to sit in the cold for two hours and get ass probed by hay?"

He didn't care what Alex thought, (okay, Dylan did) so Dylan was going to the Teen Hayride. No one had to know.  

Dylan headed home because he did promise Greg that he could come over.

Unlike his dad, he always keeps his promises.

He tossed down his backpack onto the couch as soon as he walked in the living room. Things are fine, he told himself, I'm fine. If only I can actually get myself to believe it.

He sat down and scratched at his arm, at the lines he cut into his own arm in a desperate bid to feel something other than nothingness.

Maybe he could get a couple of minutes of sleep in. He leaned back and closed his eyes.

The doorbell rang and Dylan's eyes snapped open. He got up and answered the door. It was Greg, who bounded in. Dylan closed the door and Greg was instantly on him, kissing him.

Dylan wanted to push Greg off of him. He didn't like Greg (because he wasn't Cecilia or Alex), but what else was Dylan supposed to do when he had another (queer?) guy on him.

So, Dylan shoved his disgust towards himself to the side and led Greg to the couch.

They did some homework together, which was fine with Dylan, but Greg kept sneaking kisses in.

It was infuriating, but Dylan knew that was to be expected when they've been doing this – whatever this is – for a month. So, Dylan allowed it.

Things seemed to be going fine, which was a sign that it was going to turn shitty, which always happens when Dylan thinks things are going fine for him.

He was Dylan "Monumental Fuck-Up" Gilmore after all.

While he and Greg were making out, Greg reached for the button on Dylan's jeans.

Dylan didn't feel ready for that yet, so he pushed Greg away and said, "No, Greg."

Greg stopped but he seemed confused, "Who the hell's Greg?"

Dylan was confused, "You?"

"My name's Cole," G̶r̶e̶g̶  Cole said.

Oops.

"Well, you look like a Greg," Dylan defended himself. It was a stupid defense. How did he not know Cole's name? What did that make Dylan?

Well, it made him an asshole, that he knew.

Great, he was an asshole now.

Cole said, "How did you not know my name?"

And for some reason, that question irritated Dylan. He knew it was wrong, maybe he finally wanted to hurt someone the way he was hurting, so he said, "Maybe you shouldn't be such a little bitch about your name."

Then Cole got mad, Dylan knew Cold had the right to get mad because Cole took off.

Well, Dylan supposed that he got dumped by a guy who he wasn't even dating.

"Hey, get up!" that was Lorelai this time, shaking him awake.

Dylan woke up. He had fallen asleep on the couch.

"How are you always this tired?" asked Lorelai. "You need to drink more coffee."

Dylan didn't think drinking coffee would fix whatever the hell is wrong with him. "I guess."

"We're going out to celebrate," Lorelai said.

"Celebrate what?" asked Dylan.

"Wow, you're a heavy sleeper," Lorelai stated. "You slept through all the excitement?"

"What excitement?" asked Dylan. He hated feeling stupid, which was happening right now.

Lorelai sounded so happy, "Christy and Rory got accepted into Chilton."

Dylan honestly didn't feel happy about it. He just felt...hollow. He forced a smile, "That's good. It'll be weird not going to school with them, but they earned it."

Lorelai clearly didn't notice the fakeness of Dylan's happiness, "Yeah, they did." She looked at some pictures of Dylan, Rory, and Christy together. Dylan looked too.

Dylan felt a bit envious of that kid; that kid who actually knew what happiness felt like. He also felt a bit sad too, because that kid didn't know what he was going to turn into later down the road.

"Mom," Dylan started.

"Yeah?" asked Lorelai.

Do you feel like you did when you were young? Do you feel dead inside? Have you ever wanted to end your own life like I do on a regular basis? I'm scared to kill myself. Instead, Dylan asked, "How are you going to afford Chilton for two kids?"

"You let me worry about that," said Lorelai. "I'm the parent here."

Barely, thought Dylan.

The next evening, Rory decided to try on her new Chilton skirt. Dylan and Jack were sitting on the couch together while Christy was off in her room that she shared with Rory.

Rory asked, "What do you both think, Dill and Jack?"

"That you're calling me a dill pickle?" Dylan said, "And I hate dill pickles."

"That's not what I meant," Rory said.

Dylan looked at the skirt. It went below her knees. "It's too short. Gotta cover up your ankles because you're gonna make all the guys think you're easy."

Jack made a face at the thought.

"Okay, you're not allowed to answer questions anymore," Rory told him. She looked at Jack, "How about you?"

Jack shrugged, looking awkward. He never had a girlfriend before and he never expressed in the opposite sex as far as Dylan knew. The only girl Jack had kissed was Cecilia and that it was in the seventh grade because Jack said that Cecilia was his girlfriend because some girl wouldn't take no for an answer. That was Jack's first and last kiss.

Eventually Lorelai and Rory came back into the house with Sookie heading for the kitchen..

"I can't believe tomorrow is my last day," Rory was saying excitedly.

"I know," Lorelai replied.

"Today, I was so excited, I dressed for gym," Rory said.

"You're kidding!" replied Lorelai.

"And I played volleyball," Rory said, standing on a stool so Lorelai can hem the skirt.

Lorelai asked, "With other people?"

Rory said, "And I learned that all this time I was avoiding group sports?"

"Yeah?" asked Lorelai.

"Was very smart because I suck at them," Rory said. "I hit Alex in the face with the volleyball."

Lorelai was pinning up the skirt, "Well, yeah, you got that from me."

Jack asked, "You hit people in the face with volleyballs?"

Christy poked her head in from the kitchen, "Sookie what's to know where the pâté is."

Lorelai said, "Tell her that it's currently at Zsa Zsa Gabor's house."

Christy went back into the kitchen.

Dylan looked at the skirt, "I think it's a bit too short. All those pervy rich white kids are going to get the wrong impression."

"You're not allowed to have opinions anymore," Rory told him.

Lorelai looked at the skirt, "Nah, I think he may have a point."

"I'm going to the store because you have nothing besides some questionable Boston creme doughnuts Christy dared to take a bite out of," Sookie said.

"Hey, those were mine," Dylan replied.

"Anyway, you feel like duck?" asked Sookie.

"Ooh, if it's made with chicken, absolutely," Lorelai said.

Jack made a face at the thought.

Sookie put her shoulder bag on, "I'll be back." She went over and kissed the top of Jack's head. "See you when I get back, Cory." She took off.

No one besides Sookie called Jack, Cory.

Rory said, "Why do I keep forgetting that your name is Coriander?"

"That's just the way I want it," Jack replied.

"All right," Lorelai said, finishing hemming Rory's skirt. "This will give you an idea. Go see how you like it."

"Okay," Rory said, hopping down from the stool and going to stand in front of the stairs. "I love being a private school girl." She went to her and Christy's shared room.

"And you got all those pervy guys who like private school girls too," Dylan whispered to Jack.

Jack looked scandalized at the thought.

Dylan was leaning against the wall of the bakery, reading Bag of Bones by Stephen King.

Rory asked, "So, do you like cake?"

"What?" asked a tall guy that was next to Rory. He was holding a box.

"They make really good cakes here," Rory said. "They're very...round." She started looking in the box and took out a book.

"They make other stuff too," Dylan said.

Rory handed the book over to Dylan, "Here. Give this book back to Ricky."

Dylan took the book and looked at it: The Secret History by Donna Tartt. "Okay."

"I wanted to discuss it with him," Rory said. "They were all horrible people."

Dylan looked at the new guy, who was glaring daggers at him. Dylan had him beat, though, no one could hate Dylan as much as he hated himself.

Rory seemed to notice and looked at the guy, "Oh, Dean, this is my brother, Dylan." She looked at Dylan, "Dylan, this is Dean. He's new here."

Dylan watched with slight amusement as the animosity melted away from Dean's features.

"Wow," Dean said, looking at Dylan.

Dylan looked at Dean up and down, "You aren't all that hot, either." He went inside the diner.

Dylan was tying his shoe when Lorelai walked in holding a paper bag.

She handed it over to him, "Here. This is for you. By the way, we're having dinner with the grandparents tomorrow."

Dylan took the bag, "I know my sleeping schedule is screwed up, but even I know it's not Christmas tomorrow."

"It's just dinner," Lorelai replied.

Dylan looked in the bag and took out a blue striped tie. He looked at Lorelai confused and he looked at the tie. He felt his heart sink when realization slapped him in the face. "I don't want to go to Chilton."

"I know that," Lorelai told him. "I told them that you didn't want to go and you never applied, but your grandmother apparently pulled some strings. She said that you needed to be with your sisters."

"Why are you talking to them out of the blue? Why...?" Dylan thought about it. The fact that Emily got his ass thrown into Chilton and they were having dinner with them on Friday when it wasn't even a holiday...there was no way in hell that Lorelai could afford two girls to attend Chilton, hell she couldn't afford for even one girl to attend, especially tacking on a third... "They're paying the Chilton tuition, aren't they? And the Friday Night Dinner is a stipulation, isn't it?"

"Wow," Lorelai said, "And they say blondes are dumb?"

"Yeah, I gotta go," Dylan said.

"To where?" asked Lorelai.

"The Teen Hayride," Dylan said.

"We'll bring you something back," Lorelai told him.

Dylan probably wasn't going to eat whatever was brought back.

He went to the Teen Hayride meeting point.

"Hi, Dylan," Lane said.

"Hi, Lane," Dylan replied. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm on a date," Lane said, motioning to a Korean boy. "His older brother is chaperoning." She motioned to another boy. "All three of us don't want to be here."

Dylan would be mortified if his mom made him chaperone one of his sisters' dates. "That's awful."

Lane nodded and sad, "Hi, guys."

Dylan was confused. He looked over his shoulder.

Ricky, Jack, Mai, Alex, and Cecilia had shown up.

"So, Dylan is going to Chilton with you two," Lorelai told them.

Christy was in disbelief, "Why did he change his mind?"

"Maybe he realized that he wanted to go with you two after all," Lorelai replied. "He did refuse to move up a grade."

Rory stabbed a piece of lettuce, more to show her displeasure at the idea of her own brother being considered on moving up a grade and not her. She knew that was the reason why Dylan dropped to a 3.9 GPA so he would ensure staying with his sisters. His response was, "We were born together and we'll graduate together, that's how it goes."

It was frustrating because Dylan didn't have to try as hard as she and Christy did and somehow he was the one to end up being considered going up a grade. It seemed kind of backwards.

"When he realized he had to wear a uniform, he made a face and said 'oh god no,'" Christy said, mimicking her brother's look of disgust. "So, what really changed his mind?"

Lorelai looked at Rory, "So, you were late getting home tonight."

Change of subject. Suspicious, Christy thought.

"Yeah, I went to the library," Rory said.

"Oh," Lorelai replied. "Oh, I forgot to tell you two, we're having dinner with your grandparents' tomorrow night. Dylan already knows."

Rory asked, "We are?" Lorelai hummed an agreement. "But it's September."

Lorelai replied, "So?"

"There isn't a holiday in September," Christy pointed out.

"Look, it's not a holiday thing," Lorelai stated. "It's just dinner, okay?"

"Fine, sorry," Rory replied.

Luke brought their food over, along with a container with Dylan's food. He ripped the ticket off the pad and set it down. "Red meat can kill you. Enjoy."

Christy looked at the club sandwich that she got, "Thanks for the heads up." She took her plate, picked up a piece, took the toothpick out and took a bite. "Ketchup."

Lorelai passed the bottle to her and spoke to Rory, who had been quiet for the entire evening, "So, I finished hemming your skirt today." Rory stared blankly at her. "A grunt of acknowledgement might be nice."

"I don't understand why we're going to dinner tomorrow night." Rory said, "I mean, what if I had plans? You didn't even ask me."

"If you had plans, I would have known," Lorelai pointed out.

Rory asked, "How?"

"Well, you had have told me. You would have told your siblings and they would've told me," Lorelai said.

"I don't tell you and them everything," Rory defended herself. "I have my own things."

Lorelai replied, "Fine, you have things."

"That's right," Rory said. "I have things."

Lorelai said, "Hey, I had dibs on being the bitch tonight."

Rory asked, "Just tonight?"

Christy looked at Rory, "Hey, I thought it was agreed upon that Dylan is the moody one in this family. What gives?"

"I'm not sure I want to go to Chilton," Rory said.

Christy dropped a fry in shock at that. Chilton was all Rory wanted to go to.

Lorelai looked surprised, "What?"

"The timing is just really bad," Rory said.

Lorelai repeated, "The timing is bad?"

"And the bus ride to and from Hartford, its thirty minutes each way," Rory stated.

"I can't believe what I'm hearing," Lorelai stated.

"Plus, I don't think we should be spending that right now. I mean, I know Chilton's got to be costing you a lot, especially with three kids going," Rory said.

"Oh, you have no idea," Lorelai stated.

"And I don't know how you talked Dylan into going, but I think he'll be glad that if you remove him from Chilton. I can go to Stars Hollow High with him. All of your money should be going toward buying an inn with Sookie," Rory stated.

Christy asked, "Don't you want to go to Harvard?"

"We don't know that I can't get into Harvard if I stay where I am," Rory said.

"Okay, enough. Enough with the crazy talk, okay?" Loreleai said, "I appreciate your concern, but I have this covered."

Christy asked, "How?"

Lorelai looked at Christy, "I just do, okay?"

"I still don't want to go," Rory stated.

Lorelai looked at Rory, "Why?"

"Because I don't," Rory said.

Lorelai said, "I have to get out of here." She got up to leave, heading towards the door.

"Don't forget to pay," Christy called to her.

Lorelai returned and dropped some money on the table, before leaving with Rory following after them.

Christy caught Lydia's eyes, because she was now looking at her from the counter. Christy held up a hand, "Boxes and a bag please."

Lydia nodded and went to get the boxes and a bag.

After the food was packed, Christy went outside, finding her sister and mother walking ahead of her.

She hurried to catch up, only stopping to look at the horses pulling the wagon for the hayride. Lane was in between two Korean boys, and all three looked miserable.

Christy spotted Dylan with his friends. While Dylan's friends were talking amongst each other, Dylan looked like he was staying silent, barely acknowledging them, even when Ricky or Mai shook his shoulder to get his attention.

Sometimes Christy worried about him – really worried about him. It was like one day, he was the cheerful guy and the next he just started isolating himself. He always said he was fine, so maybe he was. It could've been a puberty thing. 

Christy shook her head of worried and hurried to catch up to her sister and mother.

It looked Rory was hurrying away as Lorelai tried to catch up to her, "Oh, you're gonna have to walk faster than that. You're gonna have to turn into friggin' Flo-Jo to get away from me."

They finally made it home. Christy ducked into the kitchen, put the left-overs in the fridge, went into the room she shared with Rory, grabbed her messenger bag and took off to Joey's room as she heard Lorelai saying, "This is about a boy, of course. I can't believe I didn't see it. All this talk of money and bus rides. You got a thing going with a guy and you don't want to leave school."

Christy closed the door and chose to lounge on her brother's bed to read while she heard Macy Gray playing. She rolled her eyes at their dramatics.

As soon as Dylan walked into the door, Lorelai asked, "Do you know who the guy is that Rory wants to throw Chilton away for?"

Dylan was confused, "I thought she got over her crush on Alex."

Lorelai asked, "Is Alex working as a stock boy at Doose's now?"

"Oh, hell no," Dylan replied, horrified at the thought. "He's still working part-time at the video rental place." 

Taylor Doose hated Alex. Doose thought that Alex was a menace to society and needed to be let loose to join the 'rabid dog pack'.

Also, Alex was dating Cecilia and Rory knew that.

"Okay, so it's not Alex then," Lorelai said. "Do you know who it is then?"

What made her think that he willingly went up to random dudes to talk to them? Dylan had to keep his distance, because people might find out and then beat him up for being gay despite him being bi. 

"I don't know," Dylan replied.

"Your nachos are in the fridge, according to Christy," Lorelai told him as he was going upstairs to take a shower.

On Friday evening, Christy, Rory, and Dylan stood on the porch with their mother, who had a coffee in hand.

The ride to Hartford had been quiet because of the argument that Rory and Lorelai had, all because of some guy that Rory wanted to stay in Stars Hollow with. So, Christy sat in the front while Rory sat in the back with Dylan.

They stared at the door.

Dylan wore a nice black jacket, a black tee-shirt and black jeans, since he really didn't have anything fancy and that was the closest thing to fancy he had in his closet.

Rory asked, "So, do we go in or do we just stand reenacting The Little Match Girl?"

Lorelai said, "Okay, look, I know you and me are having a thing here and I know you hate me, but I need you to be civil, at least through dinner and then on the way home, you can pull a Menedez. Deal?"

"I thought those dick-twits killed their parents because they were abusive to them," Dylan said.

"I appreciate your creative insults," Lorelai muttered.

"I still believe they killed their parents just to go on a spending spree," Christy told him.

"There's that too," Dylan admitted.

Lorelai spoke to Rory, "But do we have a deal?"

"Fine," replied Rory and Lorelai rang the doorbell.

Emily opened the door and Dylan nearly took a step back at how quickly his grandmother opened the door. It was like she was standing there, waiting for them.

"Hi, Grandma," Rory and Christy said in unison.

Christy elbowed Dylan, who replied, "Hi, Grandma."

Emily was looking at Dylan's hair, "Dylan, what did you do to your hair? Last time I saw it, it was short."

"Oh, you know, I scalped a dude and decided to wear it as hair," Dylan replied sarcastically. Lorelai snickered but elbowed him in the ribs. "I grew my hair out."

"Well, you're right on time," Emily pointed out, letting them in.

"Yeah, yeah, no traffic at all," Lorelai said as they walked in the mansion.

Emily took the overcoats from the girls and took Dylan's jacket, putting them on the coat-rack. As she hung them up, she spoke, "I can't tell you what a treat it is to have you here."

"Oh, well, we're excited too," Lorelai said.

Emily looked at the to-go coffee cup that Lorelai was still holding. "Is that a collector's cup or can I throw it away for you?"

Lorelai looked at the cup she was holding, "Oh." She went to throw it away in the wastebasket.

"In the kitchen, please," Emily told her. She turned her attention to the two girls, "So, I want to hear all about Chilton."

"We haven't actually started yet," Rory said.

Emily led Rory and Christy into the living room.

Dylan looked at his mother as she threw the cup in the wastebasket, before following her into the living room.

"Richard, look who's here," Emily said.

Richard looked up from his newspaper, "Dylan, you grew your hair out."

"Yeah," Dylan said. "I just wanted to shake things up a little."

"It looks nice," Richard said.

"Thanks," Dylan said. At least Richard seemed glad to remember that he had a grandson, unlike Emily who seemed like she didn't want to remember she had one.

Richard looked at Rory and Christy, "Rory, you're tall."

"I guess," Rory replied.

Richard asked, "Well, what's your height?"

"Five-foot-seven," Rory replied.

Richard asked, "How about you, Christy?"

"Five-foot-six," Christy replied.

"That's about average," Richard said. He looked at Dylan, "How about you, Dylan?"

"Five-foot-eight," Dylan replied.

Richard hummed, "That's about average for men, too."

Yeah, that sounded about right with Dylan's life – average.

Lorelai walked in, "Hi, Dad."

Richard looked at her, "Lorelai, Rory's tall while Dylan and Christy are about average."

"Oh, I know about Rory being tall. It's freakish. We're thinking of having Rory studied at M.I.T."

"Ah," Richard replied, clearly not finding the joke funny. He returned to his paper.

Emily walked over, holding a tray that had champagne flutes. She asked, "Champagne, anyone?"

Lorelai and Dylan's sisters took a champagne flute.

"Oh, that's fancy," Lorelai said, taking one.

Emily looked at her only grandson, "Dylan?"

"Nah, I'm good," Dylan replied. He would have, but Jack had an intolerance to alcohol.

Jack had broken out in hives and had trouble breathing. Cecilia had to call him an ambulance. Cecilia had to call Sookie over it. Sookie understood where Cecilia and Jack were coming from – being teens, wanting to try new things.

However, due to that and Ricky being Jewish and not being allowed to have alcohol, they agreed to never drink alcohol, to stand in solidarity with Jack and Ricky.

"Ah, well, it's not every day that I have the triplets and Lorelai here for dinner on a day the banks are open," Emily said. "A toast – to Rory, Christy, and Dylan entering Chilton and an exciting new phase in their lives."

"Here, here," Richard said, holding his glass up.

The girls and Richard drank their drinks.

"Well, let's sit everyone," Emily said.

Dylan sat on the couch in the middle next to Richard, with Rory sitting down next to Dylan, to avoid being close to Lorelai.

"This is just wonderful," Emily said. "An education is the most important thing in the world, next to family."

"And pie," Lorelai blurted out. Christy and Dylan looked at her, confused. "Joke, joke."

"Ah," replied Emily.

Richard handed a section of newspaper to Dylan, who took it. It was a crossword puzzle. Richard handed him a pen and Dylan took it.

"Thanks," Dylan told him.

After doing the crossword and an hour of awkward small talk, it was time for dinner, where they headed to the dining room.

Rory, Dylan, and Christy sat on one side of the table, while Lorelai took the other side.

After a few minutes of eating (Dylan was pushing his food around on his plate), Emily asked, "How do you three like the lamb?"

Rory looked down the table at Christy and Dylan, before looking at Emily, "It's good." Rory spoke for her siblings.

Emily asked, "To dry?"

Rory looked down the table at her siblings and then back at Emily, "It's perfect."

Emily looked at Dylan, "Are you okay? I don't recall seeing you take a bite."

It felt like everyone's eyes were on him, so Dylan forced himself to take a bite of food.

Seeming appeased, they went back to eating, Dylan forcing himself to take small bites, considering he has Emily boring holes into his skull, making sure that he eats.

"The potatoes could use a little salt, though," Lorelai said.

Emily looked insulted, "Excuse me?"

Rory asked, "So, Grandpa, how's the insurance biz?"

"Oh, people die, we pay. People crash cars, we pay. People lose a foot, we pay," Richard stated.

"Well at least you have your new slogan," Lorelai stated.

Richard asked, "And how are things at the motel?"

"The inn?" asked Lorelai. "They're great."

"Lorelai's the executive manager now," Emily stated. "Isn't that wonderful?"

"Speaking of which, Christopher called yesterday," Richard said.

Lorelai said, "'Speaking of which?' How is that a speaking of which?"

Dylan wanted a cheese grater so he can take it to his head, which would be a lot more pleasant than taking about his dead-beat father. All right, fine, the man called once a week and visited him and his sisters in Hartford at least once a year, but Christopher still had no part in taking care of them. Dylan felt no love or connection with the guy.

"He's doing very well in California. His Internet start-up goes public next month. This could mean big things for him." Richard spoke to the triplets, "Very talented man, your father."

Talented at being a dead-beat, Dylan wanted to say.

"They know," said Lorelai flatly.

Richard continued, "He always was a smart one, that boy." He spoke to the triplets, "You three must take after him."

"God, I hope not," Dylan replied.

Christy grimaced. Their mother was smart. She started off as a maid and worked her way up, despite having no knowledge of how to manage a business, before successfully running the inn. Her mother took care of them on her own, with a little help, sure. And why were they trashing her mother's smarts? Was it because she accidentally got pregnant at sixteen? Christopher helped with that.

Before Christy could voice that, her mother said, "Speaking of which, I'm gonna get a Coke. Or a knife."

"Get me a knife too," Dylan told her.

"Got it," Lorelai said, storming out of the dining room.

Rory and Christy looked at each other, moving to get up.

Rory said, "We should go talk to her."

"No, I'll go. You two stay and keep your grandfather company," Emily said.

Christy sat down, slouching.

"Don't slouch, you'll get a crooked spine," Richard told her.

Christy sat up straighter.

"So, Grandpa," Rory started, "Dylan's in a band now."

Dylan would rather not talk about it.

Richard looked at him, "Oh did you?"

"Yeah," Dylan said. "It's a metal band though. She plays the guitar along with Ricky, Jack plays the drums, Alex plays the bass, and Dylan I sing." He paused, "I think we managed to get at least twenty fans so far."

"That's good," Richard said. "What's new with you, Christy?"

"I got a B on my math homework and that's because Dylan refused to correct it," Christy admitted.

Dylan replied, "How are you going to learn when I hand you the answers?"

"He's got a point, Christy," Richard told her.

"I know," Christy grumbled. "Doesn't mean I have to be happy about it."

"You took those kids and completely shut us out of your life," Emily said.

"You wanted to control me," Lorelai replied.

"You were still a child," Emily said.

"I stopped being a child the minute the strip turned pink, okay?" Lorelai replied.

Richard asked, "How about you, Rory?"

"Oh, you know, same ol' same ol'," Rory replied. "Dylan's also got a part-time job at the bakery." She was probably trying to deflect from the fact that she didn't want to go to Chilton anymore.

Richard looked at Dylan, "Really?"

"Yeah," Dylan responded. "I felt bad for Fran and Marjorie since they're the only two working there, so I wanted to help out. They're very nice women."

Emily said, "And where would the kids have been? But no, you were always too proud to accept anything from anyone."

Lorelai replied, "Well, I wasn't too proud to come here to you two begging for money for Rory's and Christy's school, was I?"

"No, but you're too proud to let them know where you got it from, aren't you? Well, fine, you have your precious pride, we got Dylan into Chilton so he can be with his sisters, and I have my weekly dinners. Isn't that nice? We both win," Emily responded.

Dylan looked at Rory, who looked awkward.

Rory knew that their mother really didn't like asking for anything, so it had taken guts for Lorelai to ask her parents for help. So, Rory was basically throwing their mom's sacrifice for a romance with a guy that most likely wouldn't last past high school.

Lorelai told her kids that they were leaving, so they said bye to Richard, while Emily showed them out, looking smug.

As soon as the door closed, Dylan said, "Well, that was pleasant."

"I know," Christy said.

Rory looked at Lorelai, "Mom?"

"I'm okay," Lorelai said. "I just – do I look shorter?" Dylan was confused, "'Cause I feel shorter."

Rory asked, "Hey, how about I buy you a cup of coffee?"

"Oh, yeah," Lorelai agreed. "One of you drive, though, okay, 'cause I don't think my feet will reach the pedals."

Dylan tried to wiggle out of going to Luke's after getting home, but Rory and Christy had grabbed his arms to practically drag him to the diner.

Rory said, "So, nice dinner at the grandparents' house."

Lorelai replied, "Oh, yeah, her dishes have never been cleaner."

Rory said, "You and Grandma seemed to have a nice talk."

"Must've been some talk to make Mom angry-wash the dishes," Christy said.

Lorelai asked, "How much did you three hear?"

They stopped outside of the diner.

Rory said," Not much. You know, snippets."

Lorelai asked, "Snippets?"

"Basically the whole enchilada," Christy said.

Rory nodded.

"Well, the best laid plans," Lorelai started as they walked into the diner. They went to a table, and Rory and Christy basically sandwiched Dylan in, so he won't take off on them.

"They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions, after all," Dylan said.

"I think it was really brave of you to ask them for money," Rory said.

Lorelai said, "Oh, I so do not want to talk about it."

"So, how many dinners will it take before they finally turn us loose?" asked Christy.

Lorelai said, "I think the deli spread at my funeral will be the last one."

The thought of Lorelai gave Dylan a hint of fear. He looked at Christy. She, too, looked a little terrified at the thought of their mother dying.

Lorelai realized something, "Hey, wait, does that mean..."

Rory said, "Can't let a perfectly good plaid skirt go to waste."

Lorelai said, "Oh, honey, you won't be sorry."

Dylan was. He didn't want to dress up in some preppy outfit. That wasn't him.

Luke walked up to the table dressed in a button-down shirt.

"Wow, you look nice," Lorelai said. She tried to subtly check Luke out, "Really nice."

But Dylan noticed. He liked to think that he noticed a lot of things; like Luke had a crush on Lorelai, Christy had a crush on Ricky, Rory once had a crush on Alex...

Luke said, "I had a meeting earlier at the bank. They like collars. You look nice, too."

Lorelai said, "I had a flagellation to go to."

Luke did a double take, "Hey, Dylan. Long time no see."

"Yeah," Dylan replied.

"It's been three months since you've stepped in here," Luke pointed out.

Dylan wondered, Has it really been that long?

Luke continued, "I was beginning to think that I hallucinated you for a while there."

"Yup," Christy said. "Rory and I had to carry him in here."

"She's lying," Dylan said. "I was dragged."

Luke seemed to chuckle, "So, what'll you have?"

"Coffee." Lorelai added, "In a vat."

"I'll have coffee also," Rory said. "And chili fries."

"Mozzarella sticks," Dylan told him.

"He'll take some coffee too," Lorelai told Luke.

Luke looked at Christy, "And you?"

"Loaded nachos and coffee," Christy told him.

"That's quite a refined palate you all got there," Luke told them.

Christy beamed at him, "Thank you."

Luke walked away.

It looked like Lorelai checked Luke out again, "Behold the healing powers of a bath." She looked at Rory, "So, tell me about the guy."

"You know what's really special about our relationship?" Rory said, "The total understanding about the need for one's privacy. I mean, you really understand boundaries."

Lorelai looked at Christy, "So tell me about the guy."

"Mom!" exclaimed Rory.

Lorelai asked Christy, "Is he dreamy?"

Rory said, "Oh, that's so Nick at Nite."

"He's not all that hot, to be honest," Dylan replied.

Christy nodded, "Rory could do better."

"Oh, come on you guys," Rory told them.

Lorelai laughed, "What else you got to say about him?"

"He's a boring, vanilla looking guy," Dylan said. "He probably goes home to a bland spaghetti dinner and talks to his parents about his day."

Rory gasped as Christy laughed, "That's so mean."

"It's true though," Christy said, giggling.

Dylan felt himself smile, he couldn't remember the last time he actually genuinely smiled.

Luke returned with their order. He handed it out, "Coffee...fries, nachos, mozzarella sticks." He looked at the nachos and fries, "This is so unhealthy." He watches Christy and Rory both pick up their coffees to drink. "Rory, Christy, please, put down that cup of coffee. You two do not want to grow up to be like your mom."

Rory smiled, "Sorry, too late."

Luke walked away.

Lorelai said, "So tell me about the guy."

Rory jokingly said, "Check, please."

Lorelai said, "No, really, are you embarrassed to bring him home?"

Rory said, "I'm not embarrassed."

Christy said, "Have you seen the guys that Dylan brings home?"

For a moment, Dylan felt a pang of terror. How does Christy know about Cole? Then he realized that Christy was talking about Ricky, Alex, and Jack.

Lorelai made a face like she was agreeing with Christy. She asked Rory, "Does your guy talk at all?"

"No, Mom, he's a mime," Rory replied.

They'll have this, Dylan thought, looking at his sisters and mother. When I'm dead, they'll always have this.