Violet's Outfit

Spring break would've been a tough week for me regardless, just because of all the bad memories I had of last year's spring break which consisted of funeral planning, going to a funeral, and being so numb I couldn't even cry.

But this year, not only did I have to deal with all that shit plaguing my mind, but I also had to deal with my breakup with Ricky.

The Monday of Spring Break, I woke up and threw on some clothes that were just a slightly nicer variation of my pajamas.

Even the act of picking up my phone reminded me of Ricky. Usually, I'd wake up to a text or a voicemail from him, but today there was nothing.

It's not even like I'd be seeing Ricky over spring break in the first place, just because he was spending the week in Chicago with his mom. But still, I knew that we would've probably called and facetimed and talked all the time.

But now, it was just super weird to go so long without even talking to Ricky.

I spent the majority of the morning sitting in my bed while watching Spider-Man: Homecoming and eating a pint of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, and the first half of my afternoon was obviously spent watching Spider-Man: Far From Home. Peter Parker was totally my comfort character, so just sitting there and immersing myself in those movies definitely helped to keep my mind off of everything else.

After some time, I was texted by Ashlyn and told to join a Zoom call with Miss Jenn and all the theatre kids.

"Hey guys!" I said, smiling once I saw everyone.

"Hey Vi!" Nini said.

"Good, Violet, you're here!" Miss Jenn said.

"Yep! Did I miss anything? I've been kinda MIA today", I said.

"We had a meeting earlier, but this meeting is definitely more important than that one", Seb said.

"Don't worry, Ricky didn't show up to that meeting either. I figured you guys were spending the day together or something", EJ said.

Ashlyn elbowed EJ within the frame of their screen.

"What?" EJ asked.

"They broke up, you idiot!" Ashlyn said.

"Crap, sorry Vi", EJ said.

"It's fine, you wouldn't have known. Anyways, what's up?" I asked.

"North High posted a video about us. And I think we should all watch it together. Nini, share your screen", Miss Jenn said.

Nini did as told, and we all watched North High's video together, which basically tore us up and painted us as slackers just because we were on Spring Break.

To make matters worse, they spent part of the video bragging about how they were having 'an immersion experience in NYC' over Spring Break, which only served to piss me off even more.

With that, it was decided that we would film our own video to show them what we were made of, and that we were still worthy competitors.

Nini, Ashlyn, and I went to work with writing a song over Facetime, and Carlos and Gina would be choreographing some kind of simple dance for us to do in the video.

After some time, we finally finished the song.

"What do you guys think?" I asked.

"I love it!" Ashlyn smiled.

"Same, it feels so good to co-write with you guys!" Nini exclaimed.

"I agree. It really helped get my mind off of...everything", I said, looking down.

"Are you ok, Violet? I'm so sorry for what happened between you and Ricky", Ashlyn said.

"Yeah, I'm ok. I'm just upset at myself. It's my fault that we broke up, I mean it was my idea and everything. And now, I'm just really regretting it. This week is tough for me anyways, but that just makes it a whole lot worse", I said honestly.

Nini and Ashlyn both nodded, both of them knowing exactly what this week would be like for me.

"If you need anything or just need to talk, feel free to call me whenever", Nini said.

"Same here, Violet. I'm always here if you need me!" Ashlyn smiled.

"Thanks guys!" I said, smiling at my friends.

After spending some more time just talking with one another, it was time for all of us to film our separate parts of the video.

Once it was all filmed and put together by Red, it was posted on the EHS theatre Instagram, and watching it, I was just super proud and happy with how it had all turned out.

Finally, after a long day of keeping busy and getting stuff done, the weight of everything became apparent.

All day, I'd suppressed my emotions and managed to have a pretty okay day, but once I was alone with my own thoughts again I finally began to cry.

I know it sounded so pretentious, but I just felt so damn alone. Everything was falling apart and it was all my fault it seemed like.

After sometime of just sitting there and staring at my wall, my phone began to ring.

I absent-mindedly picked it up and slid to answer without even registering who was calling.

"Hello?" I said.

"Hey Violet. I just wanted to see how you were doing", Ricky said.

"Um...to be honest. I'm not really doing the best right now. This week is just super super difficult for me. And like, my mom won't even acknowledge Adam at all. She's acting like he never existed or something", I said, beginning to cry.

"Vi...I'm so sorry", Ricky said, concern in his voice.
"It just sucks, you know? He was a huge part of my life, and I can't even bring him up anymore without my mom glaring at me. Just one little mistake and he's gone just like that. I almost feel like my mom doesn't want me to be sad about it! But I can't help it", I said softly.

"I'm sure she's sad too. She just probably doesn't understand why it happened, and what possessed him to do that. Just like you are. It's ok to be upset, though. Don't feel bad for feeling the way you do", Ricky said.

"I just can't help it! I can't believe he's been gone for a year now, it just doesn't feel real", I said, crying even harder.

"It's ok...it's gonna be ok", Ricky said.

I finally calmed down after some time, mostly because Ricky was super patient with me and tried to comfort me as well as possible over the phone.

"I'm sorry for...I don't know. Burdening you with my problems?" I said apologetically, kinda embarrassed for getting all emotional.

"You have nothing to apologize for. I called you just because I knew how hard this week would be for you, and I just wanted to let you know that I'm here for you", Ricky said.

"Aww! Thank you, that's so sweet. I just really appreciate you calling up and checking on me, you totally didn't have to do that", I said, blushing slightly.

"It's fine, Vi. I was happy to just hear your voice", Ricky said.

"I was happy to hear from you too. Have a good rest of your week, ok! Explore the city, try new things!" I said.

"You too, Violet! I'll call you at somepoint", Ricky said.

"Ok, great! Bye Ricky", I said, beginning to hang up, when I heard Ricky say something else.

"I love you, Vi", Ricky said very quietly, almost to the point where I couldn't hear him.

After that, I finally hung up, a small smile on my face.

I loved that Ricky still cared about me, and just talking to him managed to make me feel a lot calmer.

I wasn't over him.

Author's Note: Hey guys! I know this chapter is kinda crappy, but I just wanted to make kind of a romantic scene/a bit of a cliffhanger when it comes to Violet and Ricky's relationship, so I hope that that came through! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and stay tuned because I'm planning on updating it about the same time next week! Also, please check out my Grease apply fic 'We Go Together' because I need tons more applications!!

Lots of love, Beth ❤️❤️❤️