Michael's Point Of View ~

The beautiful warm early morning air fills my tortured soul. The sounds of the birds chirping, as a way to remind everyone to wake and begin the new day. But today, I didn't want to open my eyes. Not after yesterday . . knowing that Eric has come back into Olivia's life. She knows that I'm upset and . . just not really myself but she doesn't know why, not exaclty. She wanted me to tell her last night but . . I couldn't. I didn't have the courage . . she was worried. Telling me she had to come into my room and talk to me as she noticing that I was just wasn't myself. 

And I wasn't. Ever since Eric came back . . I haven't been who I am. 

I try not to duel on it but most of the time I can't help it. It's a constant feeling of sadness and helplessness. To watch someone I'm in love with . . love someone else. God! My crush is serious. It's more than just a crush . . it's love, right? I believe others may describe it as unhealthy even. My thoughts are cut short when I hear the voice of Olivia and . . him. I roll my eyes at the noise of him. Ugh! What is it about Eric that always has Olivia running back to him? She does for some reason and now I just feel like some kind of stranger to her. I do wanna just tell her, talk to her. Baby, what happened? What am I to do now? I guess I should just move on but I can't seem to just walk away from my love for her . . there's just way too much. I just can't let it go. I can't. 

God! I would give her everything. If only she could see what she means to me. 

I look behind me to see the two of them trying to decide on what to have for breakfast. Olivia opening the fridge along with them both shrugging there shoulders on each suggestion that's mentioned. 

She smiles . . 

There it is. That smile . . her smile. A million butterflies invade my stomach. That image just stays with me always. Olivia is constantly there, in the back of my mind. I'm just in love with her. I look at her, knowing that I can't walk away. I can never just pack up and store my feelings away forever. For 10 years, it has never been that easy. 

"Morning Michael . . " Olivia says sweetly. Wrapping her arms around my neck from behind me, leaning down to kiss my cheek. 

I giggle. " . . morning, Liv . . "

She walks around to sit down opposite me with a cup of coffee in her hand.

"How are you feeling, Michael? . . " She asks, sounding quite concerned. 

I clear my throat. 

" . . um yeah . . better this morning, thanks Liv . . " I tell her, feeling kinda awkward. 

Eric comes out before any more words of conversation between us can be exchanged. He kisses her sweet lips. I just want to tell him to go away . . leave her and I alone. At first, it was Olivia that was left heartbroken and now it's me. But I can see how happy she is, even though it's not me that she seems to lose herself over. Olivia is trying . . wanting to be there for me. I know she's trying her hardest to figure out what's going on with me. But I can't allow her to get too close and have the possibility to figure it all out. 

Eric speaks . . 

"Olivia . . I'm sorry but I have to go. Work is calling me in . . " Eric says.  

" . . can we postpone today's plans? . . " 

Eric explains reading it off his phone. I look at Olivia, her face losing that light that I love so much. His voice is so irritating. Just go Eric and don't fucking come back. 

"That's okay . . we can do it next time . . " She says, putting on a smile. 

They kiss goodbye. Eric retreating back upstairs to get dressed quickly before coming back down, grabbing his car keys and heading out the front door without anything else said. I love how she is sitting in front of the rising sun . . it's giving her a gorgeous look. Like a halo. She looks like an angel. Her beautiful features turn sad, knowing that sudden news of Eric's last minute call to attend work as brought her such heart ache in a matter a seconds. Oh this hurts me. Seeing Olivia looking so down and disappointed. Well, I'm going to cheer her up. I stand from my seat. Crouching before her, placing my finger under her chin for her to lock those enchanting eyes of hers with my own. 

"What do you wanna do today, babe? . . " I ask. 

" . . nothing . . " She says very sadly . . very quietly, sniffling as she continues to talk. 

"Eric and I had such a fun day planned . . " Her voice sad, my poor girl. 

I'm going to make her happy. She's not spending the day all upset and feeling like she's all alone now. I wanna make her smile. I want to be with her and without Eric here. I guess I want to forget that's he's around again. I believe I deserve that, even though that certain feeling may only be for a few hours. Olivia is like my comfort zone and when she's with me and only me, I just feel so at home. I start thinking . . thinking . . then oh . . I've got it!

"Wanna make a cake? . . " I ask. My eyebrows rise, voice sounding a little cheeky as my childish side comes out. I see a smile begin to spread slowly. She looks at me . . 

"Okay! sounds fun, Michael . . " She says, cheerfully. 

2:00pm. 

Olivia picks up the cake mix box, reading the instructions. I can see her from the corner of my eyes. With her hair in a high bun along with her chewing strawberry gum, blowing bubbles every now and again. Her petite frame is in high waisted denim shorts and a black tank top. She's standing straight. Her tanned, milky thighs in my sights and her manicured finger runs along the box as she reads. She looks beautiful. 

"Michael are you making these right? . . " Olivia asks, giggling. She's teasing me. 

I smile wide. 

"Yes, Olivia I am . . " I reply, laughing. 

I finish putting all the instructed ingredients into the mix. Picking up the large wooden spoon and I start to mix it all together. I get a thought, a little tune suddenly comes into my head. 

"Liberian girl . . you came and you changed me, girl. A feeling so true . . "

From the corner of my eye, I see Olivia turn her head sharply in my direction. Then, I realise that I was singing out loud . . for people to hear? Oh no. I have never done that before. I have always felt so self conscious about how I sound. I mean, I don't sound bad but I don't sound that good. Singing, it's just something I love to do only as a hobby of mine. If I'm just a little bored or if it's a song that I write for that someone special. 

"Wow . . Michael you have a really good voice . . " She says. 

"Oh thank you, Liv . . " I say, feeling myself blush. 

"It's a really beautiful song it sounds like. Is it for anyone special? . . " She asks me. 

Her choice of words is making me blush so bad right now. Though her question that followed afterwards has increased my heart rate a little more. I feel my face heat up as I start to feel embarrassed and a little nervous by this point. I feel myself turning bright red. As I know that the song I was just singing seconds ago is for Olivia. Truth is, I wrote it for her. I did disguise it a little, just incase. But yes, it's for her. 

I clear my throat. "No . . it's not . . " I say, still mixing everything together in the bowl. 

"Well, it sounds very special. I think it was how you were singing it . . " 

She says. Licking her finger to taste the cake batter, closing her eyes as she does so.

"Mmm . . Michael this is so nice . . "

I giggle. "Hey . . it's not for you to eat just yet . . not right now . . " I say.  

She laughs. "Watch me . . "

She grabs the bowl from off the kitchen counter. It's full of the cake mix with the wooden spoon still sitting in it. She runs off with it playfully. I run after her throughout our place. Our laughs sounding like young children. 

"I'm gonna get you, Olivia . . " I playfully announce to her. 

She looks behind her shoulder, realising that I'm right behind her. Unknown now of where to go, she stands against the wall, still holding the bowl in both her hands. Her back against the wall, with a beautiful smile on her face and a mischievous giggle in her voice. Both of us a little out of breath from laughing so much. I love this. This moment right now. It's just like old times . . just like before she met Eric. It was always just me and her, being silly together and just having fun. I walk a little closer to her until I'm standing right in front of her small frame. The palms of my hands are on either side of her head as they sit against the wall. She's trapped. I dip my finger into the cake mix that she's holding. She closes her eyes. I put a dot of the cake mix upon her button nose, it's sweetly scrunched. She opens her eyes to look at me. 

"I got you baby . . " I whisper to her. 

She giggles. Our eyes staring into each others. My heart is increasing more and more. A phone beeps suddenly, it's Olivia's phone. She seems to snap back into reality. 

"Um that's my phone . . it's probably Eric. I'll get it . . " She says, her voice soft. 

She hands me the bowl.

"Sure, yeah that's okay . . " I say back quietly as she walks past me. 

to be continued.