Note: Audio clip video above is part of the dialogue I used for this scene :)

Episode: Season 9 - Do You Believe In Miracles? Pt. 3 

I felt numb. As if a part of me had died. And I knew, in my heart, that it had. A part of me was always with him and along with my love lost, so was my heart. I sat by his bedside once we brought him back to the Bunker, my hand enveloping his. His skin was ice-cold to the touch, pale and lifeless. But the worst feeling? Knowing...knowing those eyes - those candy-apple green eyes - would never open again. Never sparkle with mischief as he teased me, crinkle at the edges when he saw a slice of pie or told me good morning... No more Dean.

Sam...he couldn't handle even being in here, instead taking to drinking in the library. It was only at the sound of a very familiar voice did I know what Sam was really up to.

"Your best friend, bless his soul...is summoning me as we speak," Crowley spoke up from the chair opposite mine, "Make a deal, bring him back,"

My gaze met that of my father and I cracked a small, sad smile that didn't quite reach my eyes.

"Hey, dad," I greeted him softly, my throat slightly hoarse from all my crying, "I'm not surprised. It's kind of their thing, you know? Bringing each other back..."

I looked like a mess, I'm sure - eyes puffy, nose red, and a slight lingering headache from too many tears.

"Parker...You have to believe me. When I suggested Dean take on the Mark of Cain, I didn't know this was going to happen. Not really," he told me quietly, voice earnest for my belief.

I was silent, not saying a word so he continued, "I mean, I might not have told all of you the entire truth. But I never lied... I never lied, Parker,"

Slowly, I nodded, his words soaking in but my eyes never left Dean's still figure on the bed, "I know, dad. I know. It...it was Dean's choice to do this... No one could have guessed what the consequences were..."

I swallowed thickly, feeling my breath hitch in my throat as I gazed at him lying there - not breathing.

"When Dean found out about my baby with Sam and he left, I...I used to play this game in my head. What would I give up for just one more minute with him?" I whispered, tears clouding my vision.

Crowley said nothing, listening to me in silence as he let me talk.

"My house, the hunting...the rest of my life," I choked out, pressing a hand to my mouth to stifle a sob fighting to bubble its way up my throat.

It felt like my emotions were trying to suffocate me from the inside out, killing me slowly inside as I fought to hold it all back.

"But not long after I got the Mark, I finally got that minute...and I wish I hadn't," I breathed out in a shaky whisper, shoulders heaving from unshed tears.

I shook my head, Crowley still silent as I pressed on, "Seeing him like that, what he'd become...I wish I had just died that day Roman was born..."

A few tears escaped my eyes then, rolling down my cheeks as finally Crowley cleared his throat.

"Parker...there is one story about Cain that I might have...forgotten to tell you," he admitted and finally, I glanced up to look at his weather-beaten face, urging him to continue with my eyes, "Apparently, he, too, was willing to accept death, rather than becoming the killer the Mark wanted him to be. So he took his own life with the Blade,"

I arched an eyebrow, "But...but how was that possible? Did it work?"

Ignoring my questions as if I hadn't spoken at all, he pressed on, "No. He died. Except, as rumor has it, the Mark never quite let go,"

Reaching inside his pocket then, he pulled out the First Blade and my eyes widened, wondering how he'd gotten it back.

"You can understand why I never spoke of this. Why set hearts aflutter at mere speculation?" he shrugged, getting up from the chair to press the Blade into Dean's pale, lifeless hand, "It wasn't until Dean summoned me... No, it wasn't truly until he left that cheeseburger uneaten that I began to let myself believe..."

"Believe what?" I asked him warily, suddenly suspicious of my father's intentions, of what he was implying.

"Maybe miracles do come true. Listen to me, Parker, something is about to happen that will change everything as you know it - everything. It will be a new kind of life and you're going to have to choose if you want that...for yourself and for your children..." my father spoke ominously.

I slowly got up from my chair then, my gaze briefly flickering between my father and my deceased husband.

"What are you saying?"

His brown eyes turned to me and it felt like I was the one who'd gotten stabbed by the Blade as my father's next words sent my world caving in.

"Dean will live again, Parker...but as a demon."