25. The Art Of Sarcasm

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ONCE IN A BLUE MOON
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AFTER THE TRAINING IN THE WOODS and Luna punishing Emmett for vandalizing her favorite Iron Man water bottle, Edward and Jasper took their mates home safely while Alice took hers home.

Jasper told Luna to leave her window open tonight. He wanted to spend time with her as much as possible before he starts hunting the next day to power up for the upcoming battle.

Luna had attempted to convince Jasper to let her fight in the battle. After all, she has some of Jasper's vampire qualities. It took a bit of time, and by 'a bit of time', it means the whole ride back home before Jasper said that he'll discuss it with the others.

"Hey, daddy." Luna said when she walked in. Bella walked in first and also greeted Charlie before she made her way to her bedroom to change.

"Hey, kiddo. Youโ”€uhโ”€had fun with Jasper today?" he asked, his awkwardness that Bella inherited showing as he spoke.

Luna couldn't help the smile that curled on her lips as she approached her dad.

"Yeah. He thought it was a good idea to teach me some combat moves. You know, to protect myself...and when someone annoys me." Luna said, the last few words sound more like a whisper.

Charlie tilted his head and contorted his face into a curious expression. "He did?"

"Yep. It was fun. We trained and I won." Luna said, cocking an eyebrow.

"Of course, you did. You're the most aggressive person I know." Charlie said, causing Luna to chuckle lightly.

Her laugh died down as soon as she saw the papers that filled the table in front of Charlie. All of it was related to Jeremy's rape charge and missing person case.

Luna pursed her lips as she cleared her throat before she spoke.

"You still on Jeremy's case?" she asked.

Charlie looks over at the paper-filled desk in front of him and sighs deeply.

"I mean, after what he did to you, giving up on this case is something that I consider impossible. The bastard deserves to be punished." Charlie said, the last sentence holding a hint of fury.

Luna gulped when she caught the harshness in Charlie's tone. She moved closer to her dad and placed a hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

"We'll find him, daddy." she said with her unusually soft voice.

Charlie gave Luna a tight-lipped smile as he placed a hand over Luna's. He was sensing that the mention of Jeremy's name has made the tension in the room rise, therefore, he decided to pick a topic that he's sure will lift Luna's spirits.

"So, you and Jasper. You two getting serious?" he asked.

Just like he expected, an adorable smile tugged on the raven-haired girl's lips when the thought of the honey-blonde vampire came into her mind.

"I think we are. I mean, he's for sure unlike any guy I met. Heโ”€uhmโ”€makes me feel special and everything." Luna said, looking down to fiddle with her fingers as she did.

Charlie was surprised to see this side of his daughter. His daughter that kicked him in the knee when she was seven years old when he got her a pink cotton candy instead of a blue one. His daughter that lost her favorite cat stuffed-toy and screamed bloody murder around the house until they found it. His daughter that got detention on the first day back to school when she bit a jock's ear.

To see Luna in such a state, was both surprising and softening for him. This just means that Luna is finally accepting that it's okay to have emotions that are not anger, frustration, disgust, and everything synonymous to the three.

"I like him. He makes you happy, so that makes me happy." Charlie said, sincerity clearly seen in his eyes and heard in his voice.

The statement couldn't help but make Luna look up and smile at her father. It was these moments that were rare but valuable for her. She was now regretting not letting herself be more engaged with her dad in a way that does not involve him getting shouted at.

Yes, she was a difficult kid to raise, but she couldn't have done it without them. She owes him a lot and she plans on giving back everything that he deserves.

"I love you so much, daddy. You know that, right?" Luna said.

Charlie looks at his daughter with the same loving eyes that he had when he first saw her as a newborn baby. Oh, how time flies by.

"I love you, too, kiddo. And yes, I know. Even though, you normally say it through the words 'Thanks for the shawarma, daddy'." Charlie joked.

Luna rolls her playfully and told him that she'll just rest in her bedroom before she walks away with her fingers still fiddling with one another in anxiety.

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Night has fallen and just as Luna had promised, she left the window open and after she finished getting ready for bed, she was greeted by a honey-blonde vampire sitting on her made-up bed.

"This is starting to get less creepy." Luna said, gesturing to him suddenly popping up in her room and sitting on her bed.

"You thought it was creepy before?" he asked, his eyebrows furrowed but a small smile planted on his lips.

Luna approached the honey-blonde vampire and sat beside him with her legs resting on his lap. Jasper placed his arms over them as they continued to converse with each other.

"Well, yes. But, it's Jasper freaking Hale so, it's totally fine." Luna said.

Jasper's smile widens at Luna's response, looking away to trace the words 'I love you' on her leg.

Luna watched as her soulmate as he traced the words, not concentrating enough to feel what he was writing because of a certain thought that has been bugging her ever since her talk with Charlie.

"I'm not gonna fight in the battle." Luna told him.

Her words made Jasper look at her abruptly, his face contorted into a confused expression.

"You were so upset about not being to fight and kept convincing me to let you join. What made you change your mind?" Jasper asked.

Luna sighs deeply before she responded.

"Charlie." she started. "I'm human fighting a bunch of vampires. If something were to happen to me, he'll blame himself for it, even though it's not his fault. He'll surely tell himself that he didn't take good care of me enough. And I don't want him to feel that way. He doesn't deserve that." She explained.

Jasper reaches for her hand and squeezes it lightly, hoping that it would make her feel better.

"I understand. You'll stay here with Bella the entire fight." Jasper said.

Luna smiles at Jasper before hugging the vampire. The honey-blonde boy couldn't resist and lets his face nuzzle in her neck, taking in the strawberry scent of her shampoo and body wash.

"You know, for someone who doesn't like strawberries, you smell a lot like 'em." Jasper said, his voice muffled since his face is still buried on her neck.

"It's not like I'm eating my shampoo and body wash." she simply retorted and Jasper only smiled and hugged her even tighter.

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"My sister is doing what?" Valerie said as she stood in front of the Cullens, the Swan twins, and Jackie in the middle of the living room of the glass house.

"We thought it's best if you know what Victoria is up to. Maybe you have some tips to offer us since you know, she is your sister after all." Carlisle said. He stood next to a worried Esme. In fact, everyone was worried.

"Well, I don't know what to tell you. The Victoria I know is far from the Victoria you guys are describing. I doubt that what I know would be of any help." Valerie said. It was clear that she was shocked and confused when they told her that Victoria was responsible for the newborn army, which they found out from Bella's weird dream last night. "I can't believe she'd do such a thing."

"We were also wondering if you'd join us in this fight. Maybe seeing you might lower Victoria's guard." Alice suggested.

Valerie's golden eyes, roamed around the room, looking at the faces of everyone before making her decision.

"Of course. I'll be there." she finally answered.

It was actually their first time seeing Valerie with her true eye color. To say that they were shocked was an understatement. They never thought that Valerie would also be a 'vegetarian' as they like to call it. Not many vampires enjoy that kind of diet, so seeing her with her gold eyes was a bit surprising, and relieving at the same time. That just means that she won't be a threat to the humans.

"Bella, Luna, and Jackie will not be safe in their houses. I can take them with me, as far away from the fight as possible." Edward said.

Luna looks down, not entirely liking the idea of hiding but it's not exactly a battle that she is capable of fighting in. Therefore, all she could do was agree and hope that whatever the plan is, will work.

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Bella, Jackie, Luna, Edward, and Jasper made their way to a wide green field. As they walked, they saw three other guys coming from the opposite direction, shirtless.

"I swear, these dudes haven't heard of shirts." Jackie said as they slowly met towards the center of the field.

"You're not fighting? What, you pull a muscle or something?" Jacob said, Paul and Embry accompanying him.

"He's doing it for us, okay?" Bella told him.

"Whatever. Just tell me the plan." Jacob just replied.

Everyone turned to the honey-blonde vampire as he explained the plan for the battle with his hand intertwined with Luna's.

"This field will give us an advantage in battle. We need to lure the newborns with the girls' scents. It needs to end here." Jasper explained.

"Edward, Luna, Jackie, and I are going to a campsite. Even if Edward's with us, they'll still pick up our scents." Bella explained, then Edward took it upon himself to continue and lowkey annoy the wolves.

"Your stenches, however, are revolting." Edward said.

"Dude, you really don't want to start comparing stinks." Jacob retorted.

"Dude, you guys smell like dogs that just rolled over on wet grass and mud." Luna replied, earning an offended look from Embry and Jacob while Paul simply rolled his eyes.

"What they mean, is that your scents will mask ours if each of you will carry us. Jacob will be with me, Embry with Jackie, and Paul with Luna." Bella explained.

The statement made Jasper squeeze Luna's hand slightly, suddenly becoming territorial because of the fact that a shirtless man is gonna be carrying his soulmate. Meanwhile, Embry slightly blushed at the thought of being with his crush.

"Done." Jacob said, about to approach Bella but before he could even get one step towards her, Paul spoke up.

"Now, hold up." Paul said, causing everyone to turn to him. "You want me to carry her?" he asked, pointing to Luna.

"You got a problem with that, Chihuahua?" Luna said, her eyebrows shooting up.

"In fact, I do. You get on my nerves." Paul said.

"And you get in mine. The last time I saw you was when we were in the council meeting and you stole my burger." Luna replied.

A smirk appears on Edward. "Wrong move. Luna loves her burgers."

"It's not like she'll fight me anyway. She knows I can take her anytime." Paul said, overflowing with confidence.

"Yeah, because you're so scary." Luna said, sarcasm evident in her tone. But Paul seemed to miss it.

"See?" He said, thinking he proved his point.

Luna stared at Paul in horror as if he had done something unacceptable before she exclaimed.

"Oh God. I'm gonna be stuck with someone who has no regard for the art of sarcasm. What have I done to deserve this?" Luna exclaimed dramatically, as if Paul not sensing the sarcasm in her voice was the end of the world.

"This is not a good idea." Edward said as he shook his head.

"Edward, they wouldn't want to get anywhere near their...odor." Jasper said, causing the raven-haired girl to stifle a laugh.

Jackie accidentally caught Embry's gaze and found out he was staring at her before he suddenly looks away in a shy manner. He knows the girl is gay and is in a relationship, but a little crush wouldn't hurt.

"Okay, let's just try." Bella said as she approached Jacob.

Jackie approached Embry and the boy cleared his throat before greeting her.

"Hi." He said rather awkwardly.

"Hi." Jackie said.

Luna made a pouting face towards Jasper, not wanting to let go of his hand and be carried by Paul.

"It's what needs to be done, darlin'." Jasper said.

Luna rolls her eyes and groans in frustration.

"Ugh. Fine." She said, finally letting go of Jasper and nearing Paul.

"Let's get this over with. Maybe I'll teach you about the fabulous art of sarcasm while you carry me up to the campsite." Luna said as she approached him.

"So exciting." Paul said, contrary to what he said, he was beyond bored and irritated.

"Hey, that was good!" Luna said, referring to his sarcasm. "Now, I'm just gonna teach you some tips so you can learn from the master." She said as she tapped his shoulder.

Paul rolled his eyes and carried Luna in his arms. Jasper slightly winced at the sight of Luna in somebody else's arms. He knew there's nothing to be jealous about. But still, he can't help it.

"Eau de wolf, coming up." Jacob said.

"Run." Edward said.

They exchanged glances before the three wolves turned around and ran the opposite direction, leaving Edward and Jasper to simply watch them get further away from them.

"So, first of all, what is sarcasm? Sarcasm is the idea of saying things that are the complete opposite of what they're actually saying..." Luna went on and on about what she likes to call 'The Art Of Sarcasm 101' as they disappear into the woods.

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Decided to finish this chapter before I take a rest. It's kind of rushed so if there are any grammatical errors, I am so sorry.

I hope you liked this chapter though! Sneak peek for the next chapter will be up soon.

xoxo Sammy

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