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❛ ᴏᴄᴇᴀɴ ᴇʏᴇꜱ​​​​​​​​​​. ❜ ° . ༄
- ͙۪۪˚   ▎❛ 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 ❜   ▎˚ ͙۪۪̥◌
»»————- ꒰ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴇᴅ, ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ
ᴅᴇᴀᴅ ꒱


❝ YOU STOLE THAT
FROM SHAKESPEARE! ❞

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Three was an odd number both figuratively and literally. In a group of three, someone was always left out. In sequence, it sat between two and four: numbers that had pairs. To have two other friends meant that one of them was always excluded, even if it wasn't intentional. The same feeling applied to a group of five, for even if it was broken up into two pairs of two, an extra was always inevitable. If it was to be broken up into two and three, the problem returned to the beginning.

Ever since Shawn and Juliet had broken up, she'd formed a group of three with Topanga and Angela. While the former had been her friend for longer, she had easily become friends with Angela and the two seemed to get along as well as Juliet and Rachel did. She knew they didn't mean to leave her out but it happened anyway at different times.

After a long day of classes, they usually returned to their rooms to study or hang out before they went to dinner together. Sometimes the boys would join them and sometimes it was just them, but they'd fallen into a routine. On this particular night, the redhead had returned to their dorm to find the girls missing. With a sigh, she dumped her bag onto her bed and opened it to take out the homework she planned to do for the evening.

A few hours later, she heard voices out in the hall that sounded familiar and curiosity made her stand from her chair to go to the door. Even though she knew she shouldn't, she eavesdropped on the conversation outside. Shawn was speaking: "well, he'll definitely go again 'cause it was a great movie and he loved it. What's funnier than those mice? And we all know how I feel about. . ." His words broke off as he was interrupted by someone only to return a moment later: ". . .little pink pigs."

Angela didn't sound happy when she replied, "you should, 'cause you are one."

"Oh, come on. Don't be like that! It's just a restaurant! And besides, you can't be mad at me! Hello, drama queen, it's not like you're my girlfriend! We're just friends."

Immediately on the other side of the door, she heard the brunette answer, "you're right. You go where you want."

Juliet quickly moved to sit at her desk as Angela opened the door with an angry expression prominent on her face. Shawn followed her inside and he remained oblivious to the redhead. "Hey, come on. Hey— would you listen for a second?"

She spun around to face him as she stared him down with her arms crossed over her chest. "No, Shawn. You know what? I really don't care. You're perfectly within your right to do whatever you'd like to do."

"Yeah, but by your tone I can tell that you do care," he insisted. "It's not like-like I'm going to live there permanently or anything. It's something all guys do."

"All guys who are pigs," she shot back.

"I wasn't the only one in there!" the dark-haired boy snapped. "I don't know why you're making such a big deal about it. It was just for a bit of fun!"

"Your definition of fun is very different than mine," Angela told him coldly. "You wouldn't catch me dead in a place like that."

"Well, I know not to invite you next time!"

"Next time?"

Juliet watched curiously as the argument continued; both of them were completely unaware that she was right there. It wasn't even like she was trying to hide or pretend to work; they were too caught up in their own world to even notice her. That thought did not sit particularly well with her because when two people had their own world, there was a very strong chance that they had some type of feelings for each other. That was how she felt when she was with Shawn, after all.

It took nearly fifteen minutes for them to exhaust their disagreement as they fell into an irritated silence. It was only broken by the brunette who had finally noticed her roommate. "Juliet? What are you doing here?"

The redhead's eyes narrowed. "I happen to live here and for your information, I was doing homework before you interrupted with your problems. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to be somewhere that. . . isn't here." 

With that, she scooped up her Violin and music before she strode confidently out of the room with her head held high. She half-expected one of them to follow her and apologize or start an argument with her, but she continued down the corridor alone.

🌎🌎🌎

That weekend, Juliet chose to spend time in the common area since it was better than sitting in her room by herself. She had her books and papers spread out over a table and she was currently working on her history reading while she occasionally looked around to see what was going on. Angela was playing pool by herself (neither girl had spoken to the other since Juliet had snapped at her), Topanga was sitting by the fireplace morosely and Cory entered the Student Union through the glass doors before the brunette directed him over to his fiancée.

She watched as they exchanged words but she was too far away to hear them. The curly-haired boy gestured wildly with his hands as he (presumably) tried to explain himself while the girl listened quietly to him. Her expression softened as she (unsurprisingly) forgave him for whatever he'd done. Shawn joined them a few minutes later only to nod and turn towards the exit. He paused as his gaze fell on her and blue eyes met blue eyes. It was only for a heartbeat and then he was gone, leaving the room to carry on with the rest of his night.

With a sigh (she found that she was doing that a lot these days), she packed up her belongings and stood. Neither Angela nor the couple by the fireplace glanced up. She shouldered her bag, half-hoping someone would ask where she was going. (They didn't.)

She headed for the door at a pace that they could've easily caught up to and paused before she exited the room for good to turn and look back at them. Juliet tried to shake off the feeling and went upstairs to exchange her bag for her Violin as she decided to put in a good four hours of practice that night. She found that practicing helped slow her whirling mind and eased her feelings. She could fixate on the notes of the music she was playing and forget about everything else that took up her attention during the day.

All she had to do was concentrate on performing the piece she was working on to the best of her ability and that was it. There were no thoughts of Shawn, or Angela and Shawn, or the isolated, cut-off feeling she'd recently felt around her friends. All there was was the bow dancing along the strings of the Violin, the sound that filled the practice room and the pages of notes in front of her.

It was therapeutic and calmed her more than anything she'd found before— even more than listening to music on her Walkman. She'd put in so many hours of practice this past month that at her weekly lessons, her instructor had been impressed with the leaps and bounds she'd made. After all, it wasn't like she had a social life to take up her free time.

🌎🌎🌎

"Hey, Gollum, what're you doing in this cave?"

Juliet smiled faintly as she came out of the practice room later that night. "Hey, Kendrick. I— well, I suppose it's obvious."

"I know, I just wanted to make a 'Rings reference," the man said cheerfully. "How's it comin'?"

"Pretty well. It's the best decision I've ever made which is saying a lot."

"Good, good," he replied. "Are you going to be joining Orchestra any time soon? I'd love to have all of my Tolkienites in the same room."

"Tolkienites isn't a word."

"It is so! It's anyone who's a fan of Tolkien for your information and you've read the whole trilogy plus The Hobbit. All you could do better is read the Silmarillion."

"I may love reading but not that much," the redhead replied as she made a face. "I'll give the man credit for creating a language but I'd rather do a lot of things than read that."

"I'll get you to do it someday," Kendrick told her with a chuckle as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders companionably. The last person to do this (who hadn't been Shawn) had received a stern no but for some reason, it seemed just as. . . natural with Kendrick as it did with her best friend, so she didn't protest.

Juliet rolled her eyes. "You can try but I happen to be very stubborn. Anyway, to answer your question, I think I might be ready by Spring if everything goes according to plan. I mean, I won't get first chair by any means but at least I'll get in."

"That's the spirit," he agreed as they walked down the hall. "There are no small positions, only small players."

"You stole that from Shakespeare!" she exclaimed with a laugh.

He pretended to be offended. "Hell no I didn't! That's a Kendrick quote for you. Only one of my better ones. Who's to say that Shakespeare didn't copy off of me?"

"Uh, one— because he's dead. Two— everyone in theater knows that quote, probably."

"You just like to take the fun out of everything, don't you, Gollum?"

"Well, you nicknamed me that for a reason."

"Touché. Hey— Treebeard and I were going to get lunch this Sunday if you're in. We haven't hung out together the three of us yet so I've been meaning to ask."

"Oh," the redhead said with surprise. "Sure. I'd love to."

"I'll let you know where we decide to go," he promised.

🌎🌎🌎

Shawn waited anxiously for his best friend as he stood by the exit of the Student Union. They were finally "hanging out" as she'd suggested a few weeks ago and it would be the first time it was just the two of them since they'd broken up. It had been a weird few months because while he'd seen Juliet, they hadn't talked much at all. In fact, he could probably count on one hand the amount of words they'd exchanged. After talking so easily all their lives, the distance made him feel uncomfortable.

It didn't help that a part of it was his fault, too. Even though he'd been the one to start them on the path of a break up, there were still feelings there. Whenever he caught sight of red hair in the hallway, his heart jumped in his chest and (more often than not) he tried to catch up as he hoped it was her. Either she knew he was trying to catch her and avoided him purposefully or it was another redhead, but he was never successful.

And then, when they were in class and she raised her hand, it was all he could do to give her his full attention when she spoke. He was glad that he sat behind her in several classes so she couldn't see the way he hung on to her every word. While he'd claimed that Cory was whipped, he knew he could be just as bad.

The hardest times to hide his feelings were when their eyes met across the room. He could feel the instinctual tug to be closer to her, to go over and talk to her, to be around her because whenever he was, he felt happier. Shawn didn't think that he'd ever get tired of staring into her ocean eyes even if they weren't together.

Over the years, he'd grown to know all the shades they could be. How they turned silvery with sadness, deep navy from anger and electric when they flashed. They were brightest when she was happy, as if the sun reflected off the waves in a way that made it hard to look directly at the water. When she was curious—

"Hey, Shawnie!"

He turned, drawn from his thoughts and his breath caught in his throat. Even if she wasn't particularly dressed up or hardly looked any different than how she usually did, sometimes just the sight of her was enough to make him stop functioning. The giddy, butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling never went away no matter how much he tried to forget about it and it only intensified whenever he was looking directly at her.

The girl tilted her head slightly. "Uh, hello? Is anyone in there?" Her tone was light and teasing and a small smile accompanied her words. That didn't stop him from noticing that it didn't reach her eyes like it usually did. 

She waved her hand in front of his face, causing him to blink. "Uh, yeah. Sorry. I was just-just thinking."

Unsurprisingly, she answered, "that's never good! Anything you wanna share?"

"Uh, no." God, why did he have to sound like such an idiot? (Oh yeah: he was one.) 

As they exited the building, the redhead continued talk: "I hope you know that we aren't going to see an action movie. I'd actually like to stay awake for once. I think there's some dumb movie about pigs that came out recently if you want to see that. . ."

She carried on the conversation by herself as they walked to the bus stop, but that was how it had always been. While it wasn't like he didn't talk, Juliet had always been the more outgoing when it came to just the two of them. It also wasn't because he wasn't interested in what she had to say (God knew he was) but he could hardly remember any relevant words because he just liked her so damn much.

They were the only ones at the bus stop so they took the bench as they waited for it to arrive. For the thousandth time, Shawn wondered what on earth had possessed him to break up with her. (His own insecurity and habit of pushing away people that got too close.)

He felt the familiar urge to just kiss her even though she was still speaking because she'd never seemed to mind it when he interrupted her like that. She'd been confused the first few times— almost comically— until she'd gotten used to it. He never told her why he'd done it so much but then again, she'd never asked. (He wasn't sure if he could explain it without having everything spill out.) He had to forcibly remind himself that he couldn't. Not anymore. (Because he was an idiot.)

"Shawn? Shawn, are you listening?"

He jumped. "Sorry?"

"I asked where you wanted to go for lunch."

"Oh."

"So. . .?" she prompted him.

"Anywhere's fine."

"Right," Juliet agreed doubtfully. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I— yeah, I'm good," Shawn reassured her. "I was just. . ." He trailed off as his eyes focused on some point around her shoulder. "Don't. . . move. . ."

"What?" the redhead asked. Her expression became alarmed at the serious look on his face. "Shawnie, what is it? Oh God, there better not be anyone behind me, that would be creepy—"

"Julie," he said quietly. "Shush. Just-just stay still." When he saw her tense, he did his best to keep his poker face in place as his hands reached up to cup around the top of her shoulder gently. When he pulled away, he showed her what had caught his attention.

". . .a ladybug?"

This time, he couldn't keep the smile from his face. "It landed in your hair. I almost missed it since the colors match."

"Shawn!" she spluttered, and she immediately chose to shove him. "I thought it was something terrible!"

He burst into laughter at her indignance and couldn't stop even when she glared at him. "You. . . you should have seen your face!"

Juliet pushed him again and this time, in addition to his amusement, she was able to unbalance him so that he toppled off the bench onto the pavement. He hardly registered the slight sting or the glower she sent his way. "You're awful!"

Without thinking, he grinned teasingly at her. "You love me, though." 

(His words received no response.) 

[written oct. 2021]
[edited jun. 2022]