❝We must face our fears so they can no longer be fears❞
•

My head ached when I woke up. It pound heavily as last night was a blur. I sit up, though I'm held back my a strong force. I look down at the arm laid across my waist and raise an eyebrow before looking at the body next to me.

His head was away from me, but I could already tell who it was, by looking around the room. It was Tyler's room. And the arm across me was Tyler's. And the body next to me was Tyler.

God, did I screw up.

In a quiet panic, I remove his arm and turn my body, so my feet touched the floor. I stand up cautiously, dragging the bedsheets with me, as I make my way to my underwear and bra.

When I reach my dress that laid in the distance, the floor creaks, which only makes me wince and look at Tyler who's now stirring awake. I curse to myself, turn back around and shut my eyes, hoping he doesn't see me.

"Ro?" I hear his groggy voice call and I peak through one eye, turning back slowly to him. He sits up and runs his hand over his face, letting only his upper body show. "You're leaving?"

"Uh... yeah." I croaked, "I have to catch a flight to Italy." I say as a defense mechanism, but he only laughs, shaking his head. I quickly put on my bra and underwear, but I put on Tyler's shirt and sweats that I later found. "And plus I got a big project to work-" My words are interrupted when Tyler stands and my eyes trails down to his other naked half, "Oh god, so it did happen?"

Tyler looks down, before grabbing his boxers that was beside the bed, on the floor. "Yeah..." He trailed off as I put my hair in a ponytail and slip into my flats that I left in here. "But Ro-"

"I have to go." I cut off, grabbing my dress. "I'm really going to miss that flight." And then I rush out, quickly leaving.

•
|Days later|
•

I slip into my sneakers, ready to go for a jog. I pull my hair back into a ponytail, before putting on my watch.

This is the first time I've been out my house. Lately, after what happened between Tyler and I, I chose to avoid him. I didn't want to go back to the dorm, because I knew Jonah would show up and so, I stayed at my house. My mom is out on business and my sister moved to Philadelphia. I still call them when I feel bored.

I sighed at my reflection, still feeling the bricks laying on my shoulder. I just shook off the thoughts and head out the house, running around the block. I put in my earphones as I jog, a small smile on my face, seeing that it was lovely outside.

Kids played in the yard and there parents sat outside watching them. I wave at the neighbors as go past. I hum in delight when I hear my favorite song play, but frown when my phone rings. I pull out my earphones and take out my phone, only to see it was Jonah. I sigh and hang up, fighting the urge to feel bad, though I shouldn't.

"Not only is it bad that you ignore my calls," A voice says suddenly behind me and I jump, seeing Jonah, standing there, not in uniform, "But you ignore it when I'm less than four feet from you."

"Jonah, I-"

"I honestly don't want to hear it, Rowan." He cut off, his tone soft, "I think that we should talk, though. It's the least you could do."

I bite at my lip, guilt gnawing at me. It's the least I could do. I ignored him for almost two weeks, when no explanation. I slept with him, though my feelings for Klaus haven't been resolved. I practically using him, in general terms.

"Sure. Yeah." I nod, and he nods back, "I'll meet you at the Grill around four-thirty?" I say, looking at my phone to see it was only two in the afternoon. I had to change, see as I'm starting to sweat.

"Okay, I trust that you won't abandon me." He said and all I could do was fake a laugh before we parted ways. I walked back home, immediately taking a shower. I push my hesitant thoughts away as I step out to put on my white romper before putting on my black slip-on Toms, not in the mood for heels.

After doing my makeup, I put my hair into a bun, letting the loose strands be, before my hands wander to my ears as a reminder to look for my earrings. I search for my favorite black studs, to go along with my outfit, but I couldn't find them. 

Where could they be?

The last time I wore them was at - Tyler's house. Dammit.  I was really hoping on avoiding him until things blew over. Choosing another option, I look for another pair, but then I felt stupid. I have to face him one day or another. But what would I say?

Hey, I left my earrings here after we slept together?

I rub my forehead, letting out a frustrated sigh, before grabbing my phone and keys, and walking downstairs to my car. I slip on my shades as I get in the car and put the keys in he ignition, driving off. I tap nervously on the steering wheel, trying as best as I could to not be nervous. 

I shouldn't be though. Tyler and I have slept with each other countless times before and I never acted like this. But then again, we're not together anymore. He's with Caroline, or was, and I was just acting upon sadness from a guy who is ruthless. We both was, and now I regret it.

Without realizing, I make it to his house and now I just can't help but get out the car. I felt glued to my seat as I tighten my grip on the steering wheel. My gaze stays on his front door, before I look at my phone, seeing it was almost four. I sigh, deciding on being confident, and getting out my car. I take my phone and keys, hesitantly going towards his house. 

I walk up the stairs, only to see the front door swing open and Tyler walk out. I stand frozen, my thoughts instantly racing about that night. My instinct is to go back to my car, but it's already too late, seeing as he spotted me. 

"Ro?" He said, in confusion. "What happened?" 

"I-I uh- earrings." I blubber, and he raised an eyebrow, lost. "I left my earrings. But- forget it." I turn on my heels, regretting on coming, as I walk back to my car. However, I'm pulled back, and quickly turned to him.

"I don't like this." He huffed.

 "Like what?"

"How we act around each other now." He said in a mumble, before walking me to the car. He yanks my keys from me, only to put it in the ignition and turn on my radio. I assume that someone's in the house. "I tried to call you."

"My phone died." I say simply, trying to come up with all the excuses. "And my dog died."

"You don't have a dog, Rowan." He said, a small smile on his face, before it drops. "I know things are weird and complicated from that night but-"

"We were drunk. We were depressed for many reasons and we were vulnerable. It was a mistake." I clarify, my confidence boosting.

"What if-"

"'What if' nothing, Ty. You love Caroline and I'm just a homewrecker. It was my fault." I admit, and he frowns, taking my hand in his.

I look down at our conjoined hands, "Don't take the blame for something that's has two faults at stake. We both made the choice."

"I have to go." Was my only response, before I broke my hand away and got into the jeep. He looks at me, sorrowful as he backs away from the jeep. I back up the jeep and look at him one last time before driving off to the Grill, and having my mind spin with possibilities.

•

I make it to the Grill on time and instantly walk inside, seeing Jonah sitting by himself. I sigh, watching as he sips on his drink, before walking up to him.

He sees me walking up to him and smiles, "Glad you made it."

"Glad to be here." I smile back, fiddling with my bracelet, like I usually do when I'm nervous. The waiter comes up to us, though I'm not listening to him. My minds spaces as I hear a faint scream in the distance.

"Ro?" Jonah calls me and my attention snaps towards him.

"Hm?" I say in response and he only laughs lightly.

"I order us some beers and burgers with fries, if that's cool." He responded and I nod simply. Soon, our food and drinks came and I ate in silence, only watching as he spoke. I wasn't listening to him, but I had to seem interested.

Though I couldn't do this. I can't just  sit here and pretend like this can go somewhere. I can't do this to him.

"Jonah.." I call out and he looks up from dipping his fries in ketchup, "I only agreed to come because we need to talk. I'm sorry that I had been avoiding you and ignoring every message and call, but it's just I don't want you to get hurt. And I know I'm the one that hurt you by giving no good explanation, but -"

"I know where this is going, Ro." He mumbled, a sigh escaping him, "And I get it. You told me from the beginning; you're life is screwed up and I accepted that. I understood that you have to help your friends and help yourself. I get it. We had different motives for ourselves."

He seemed a little disappointed in the last sentence, but I couldn't come up with a response when my phone buzzed. "I'm sorry." I whispered, before turning my phone over to see I got a text:

Meet me at your house. It's urgent ~Ty

I raised an eyebrow, wondering why I got the text from an unknown number, but I didn't question it.

Then I realize, I haven't really talked to Caroline lately, so seeing this text made anger and guilt rise in me; anger for her sleeping with Klaus and guilt for me sleeping with Tyler. Some may call us even, but I choose to disagree.

"I-I uh-"

"You have to go." He finished and I look up from my phone to see him give a small smile, "It's fine. I'll just eat your untouched burger and mope about."

I can only smile back, "Thank you," I say as I stand. I lean over him slightly and kiss his forehead, "for everything."

He nods and I quickly make it outside and back to my car. When I'm on the road, I call the unknown number, but I got no answer, so I was concerned, for myself specifically.

I made it to my house after a while, seeing it was now late, and I park my car, only to see no one on my porch when I got out. I huff, now realizing it was a prank. I left Jonah because I thought something was wrong.

I just sigh, and walk up to my door, trying to find the key to it. A gust of wind blows past me and I turn quickly, only to see nothing there. This made me look for the key more hurriedly, though I drop them when I feel a tap on my shoulder.

I yelp in fright, though it subsides when I see it's only Klaus, making me now pissed off. I angrily hit him, "What the hell Klaus? What are you doing here talking to me? Actually, what are you doing here in general? I thought you'd be in New Orleans by now and away from me."

"Well, I did text you to come here." He shrugged, lightly and I only scoff, knowing it was too good to be true. I go and reach for my keys that are still on the ground, but he gets it before me and holds it in his hand, "We need to talk." 

"I've 'talked' with enough people for today, thank you very much. Now if you don't mind," I say and try to stretch out to my keys, but he keeps them out if my reach.

"Do you mean Tyler?" He piped up and my head turns to him instead of my keys, "Or that deputy?"

"Stalker much?" I gritted, clutching the phone in my hands.

"Well, you can call it 'watching over you'." He suggested, a smirk on his face, and I roll my eyes.

"Then, go 'watch over' Caroline. With the moment you shared with her, I think you'd be more happy to do so." His smirk soon drops after that, but he all doesn't let go of my keys.

"I tried to stop thinking about you. And I can't." He explains, "And you told me you didn't want me in your life."

"I don't!" I snapped suddenly, "And you should have tried harder. But I guess you being Klaus Mikaelson, you just got to have an even scoreboard. You just have to have revenge."

"I was angry about what you told me-"

"And I was angry about what you did to hurt me, so I had a one night stand with Tyler." I confess.

"Well, it's your fault." He blames and I laugh dryly, "You telling me all that and making me get revenge, shows how much control you have over me."

"Hurting me in general shows how much control you have over me." I retort, before I fiddle with my bracelet and take it off, "And clearly, that's all you want to do, so compel me."

"What?"

"Compel me. So you can get the honest truth out of me because what I told you that night was bullcrap." I yell, using all my strength to push him, "You want to know that caring about you is the absolute death of me and that at times I hate because of what you do and how other times I love you because of what you do.

"Or how at times I can't breathe, because I'm afraid.. Afraid that I have to deal with the fact that loving you is painful." I cry out, continuing to hit him, though I'm not having an effect, "Or that loving you is so exhausting. So if this is me being honest, and this is what it means to love you, Klaus, then.. then I don't want it."

I didn't even realize that I was crying and that he was holding onto my wrist. "You make me weak, Klaus." I mumbled, not daring to look up at him. "But I was always weak."

It was silent for a few moments until I heard him breath out heavily. "You are strong, Rowan." He muttered to me, "You proved that to me, even when I thought you were a helpless human."

"But I'm not!" I whimper, "I'm not human. Not anymore."

"Yes you are." He picks up my head after dropping my right arm, so I could look at him, "If you still have your humanity and you still cry during animal cruelty commercials, you are still human." After all this, he chooses now to make a joke.

"You're not funny." I laugh regardless, "Not one bit."