chapter 4. this is me trying

"I just wanted you to know

this is me trying"

May 9th ,2017

"I GOT ACCEPTED I GOT ACCEPTED!" Sitara squealed when she looked at the letter. Sitara had just gotten accepted into the New Zealand School of Music, and it was her dream to become just like Taylor Swift. Kainaat was the first to hear the news.

"Congrats!! So you're going to New Zealand in 2018 for music?" Kainaat asked and Sitara nodded. "Yes I am! So excited!"

"Cool, wait until I reach America to be a swimsuit model." Kainaat said with a smirk as she did a weird pose (from Sitara's perspective).

Sitara rolled her eyes. "Seriously? A swimsuit model? I mean it's a famous career, but it's kind of hard to get, you know? Maybe try something more easier?"

Kainaat nodded, but she was mad on the inside. She always wanted to be a model in America, even her parents didn't encourage it. But Sitara wanted to become a singer, that's also a famous career like my dream? And my parents are encouraging her, it's not fair Kainaat though to herself.

When they both grew, Sitara started getting more attention. Maybe with the grades and studying. Kainaat tried her best, she did study, even though she was a popular kid. She didn't get good grades like Sitara. Sitara isn't even her biological sister, that made Kainaat more angrier.

At the dinner table, the Oberois couldn't stop talking about Sitara's acceptance into the New Zealand School of Music. Kainaat sat there, and no one talked about her collage acceptance letter.

Kainaat nudged her father at the dinner table. "Papa, I got accepted into a collage nearby! Aren't you happy?"

Mr. Oberoi nodded. "Yes, I am happy, but look at Sitara. She just got accepted into a music university abroad! Why can't you go to the university abroad like her?"

"Kainaat, we don't like the career choice of you becoming a model. It's just... you know. Not educational?" Mrs. Oberoi added.

Kainaat frowned. "But Ma, Sitara is studying at a music university. Isn't that also not educational?".

Sitara suddenly developed an interest for her roti.

"But singers know about music, and that's good! Models just catwalk on runways. Sweetheart, I don't know if this is a good idea." Mr. Oberoi said with a stern look on his face.

Kainaat had enough. She walked away with fury to her room and locked her door. Mr. Oberoi was yelling for her to come back, but she just opened her diary and put her headphones on. She started playing the Red album (not Taylor's Version sadly) to calm her down.

Kainaat wrote her thoughts in her journal. Ever since Shubman left school for cricket training, Kainaat felt more depressed. Shubman was her boyfriend, they still kept in touch. But Shubman's training became more extreme, and they had no time to talk.

"I'll be back one day, I promise." Shubman said to Kainaat when he was about to leave. Those words couldn't get out of Kainaat's mind.

Kainaat also knew that Sitara liked him, which made her uncomfortable. She'd seen the way Sitara looked at him, in a dreamy way. Kainaat loved her "sister" but she just didn't want her near her boyfriend.

Kainaat decided to take her phone out and call Shubman. Shubman was done training, so he picked up the call.

"Hey, babe. I'm glad you called!" Shubman exclaimed over the phone.

"Babe! I miss you so much!" Kainaat replied back. "How's training going?"

"It's pretty rough, if you were here it would be much better. I love you." Shubman said on the call, he sounded sad.

"You don't seem to be happy. Are you okay?" Kainaat asked in a concerned voice.

"Babe, it just feels like... something is missing between us. You know?" Shubman replied.

Kainaat chuckled nervously. "What do you mean? There is something between us, I can feel it!"

"You feel it, but I don't. Babe, I don't wanna break up, but I need some space. You know?" Shubman said. He was serious. Shubman didn't feel that heart pounding sensation around Kainaat anymore. If Shubman was more honest, he felt it around her sister.

Kainaat was heartbroken. "Am I... not good enough? Is it because you like someone?"

Shubman shook his head. "Babe, I love you. You are good enough for me, but I don't feel that connection. I think we should separate for some time"

Kainaat nodded, now she was more heartbroken. Shubman was her only hope, but that failed too. "Ok, I understand Shubman."

"Take care Kainaat." Shubman said and then cut the call.

Kainaat started to sob. It felt like Sitara was the favored one, and now Shubman said there was no sparks between them. Kainaat just wanted to be happy for real this time instead of covering her depression with a smile

VIRAT

Virat sat in the living room with his wife, Anushka Sharma, which he got married to last year. He looked depressed and stressed, which made Anushka worried.

"Sweetheart, are you okay?" Anushka asked in a concerned voice. "Something's on your mind, I know it."

Virat shook her head. "It's nothing, just my sister. Sitara."

"Who's Sitara? I've never met her, is she-" Anushka tried asking but Virat interrupted her. "Sitara is my younger sister. She went missing, she was only five. The photo of the young girl is her."

"After papa died, it became more stressful. I can't get both of them off of my mind, but I know she's alive, something tells me."

Anushka nodded, she felt bad for Virat. She never knew about his missing sister. "Sweetheart, I didn't know about her. I hope we can find Sitara, and maybe she's happy and she still remembers you."

Virat sighed. "Darling, I don't want to talk about this. Sitara is a private matter, I don't want to talk about it."

Anushka nodded, she knew she had to keep silent. It was a very sensitive topic for her husband, and she didn't want to add more to his plate. From that day onward, she decided that she would try and find his sister, even though it was impossible. 

damn that chapter 

I've been favoring Sitara (augustine) but I feel so bad for Kainaat (betty)

again, horrible writing, but I think this was my best chapter

I wanted to focus on Kainaat and Virat's perspective cause I always did Sitara

Also French chapter names. (Thanks to my Ishan Kishan for teaching me)

Any comments?

Have a good day!