●・○・●・○・●
CHAPTER SEVENTY-THREE,
breaking point

-

༇ "DEEP down, you know it, don't you? This world shows what we've always been. It doesn't make us monsters. Back in the real world, people had to hide what they really wanted. Had to follow the rules." He kisses her neck, tongue gliding along her collarbone. "But here, there are no rules. Nothing's illegal anymore. It's just human nature."

She tries to swallow the fear—and maybe the truth—away, but she's unable to. What if he has a point? Back in the real world, she already committed these illegal things. Stealing, avoiding the police, selling at the black market—it's no better than what Niragi is doing. But that doesn't mean she has to let this happen.

"Why don't you find someone who wants this? I'm sure you'll get way more pleasure from that," she says through her breaths.

"I like a challenge." He presses his lips down to the other side of his neck, dragging them down to her arm, and then back up to her collarbone. Baya's breaths heave, yet she still can't find the power to push him off. Maybe that strategy won't even work. If she can somehow talk him out of this...

"You don't like me," she answers. "So why—"

"Who said that?"

She's at a loss of words for a second, then recovers and says with ease, "Kaito bullied you, didn't he? I was Kaito's friend. Why would you like your bully's friend?"

He stops in his tracks at the mention of Kaito and bullying. She can feel his breathing hitch, a slight change in the atmosphere before the wetness of his tongue continues sliding along her body.

Baya realizes he will never respond, so she adds, "Are you trying to prove something? Because if that's the case, give up already. The only good thing you can prove is that you're different from them. That you became a better person after they—"

"After they aimed baseballs at me? After they made me eat rice with urine in it?" He interrupts harshly. His grip on her tightens as he pulls her down, his legs clasping around her waist. "You know what I will prove?"

The only thought that swims through her mind is the fact she will most likely not escape this. "What?" She whispers.

"That I can make you feel better than they can." His fingers slither down to the bottom of her two-piece, hooking them around and—

Baya cups his face, leaning in with parted lips.

And bites his nose. No matter how hard Niragi tries to pull away, cursing as he does so, Baya continues sinking her teeth into his skin.

"You bitch!" Until the gunshots echo through the room. That's when she stops, shocked. Her eyes jump around the room, searching for what he aimed at. Eventually, she finds holes in the ceiling.

Phew.

Niragi isn't done. His flat palm collides with her cheek at least three times, then he uses his fist.

The force of the blows sends her head spinning. With her hands, she tries to cover her head. Niragi pins them together with one hand.

She spits in his face, a mixture of saliva and blood. His lips curve into a dark, pleased smile. Terribly slow, he uses his tongue to lick the leftover spit off his lips before doing the same to her entire face.

Niragi rips his blouse off with one hand, wrapping the fabric around her hands to keep them stuck together. Her legs remain stuck beneath his weight. Baya's chest moves up and down so fast that he has trouble running his tongue along it—

●・○・●・○・●

Baya jerks awake. Her lungs drag air in, panting. Sweat slicks her skin. When she moves her wrists, the straps bite into them.

She whimpers. Faces blur and overlap. Lingering eyes, a syringe glinting, a hand pushing her chest against a mattress.

"No!" She thrashes against the straps. "Get off me! Don't touch me— don't you dare!"

A chair scrapes, followed by footsteps and a voice. "Yuzuki."

Her heart lurches. The thing in her chest feels wrong. She can feel it when she gasps, clicking faintly.

She sobs. "No. No. Take it out! Take it out of me!"

"You're safe. You're alive. It's okay—"

"You strapped me down! You drugged me. You put this—" she nods down at her chest— "inside me when I said no! You're no different than them!"

His eyes betray something. "I did what I had to."

"You took my body away from me!" she shrieks. "You're supposed to be the one who never did! You—" Tears streak her face. She twists so hard that the strap slices her wrist open. "You're supposed to be the one I trusted."

"If I hadn't, you would be dead now."

"Then I'd rather be dead! Better dead than this!" She tries to slam her head back against the headboard.

Kiyoshi appears, grabbing both sides of her face. "Stop it, Baya, stop before you tear your stitches."

She spits at him. The saliva lands on his cheek. "You helped him. You both—"

"Yuzuki. Calm down. You'll hurt yourself."

"You already hurt me!" she screams, "You made me relive all of it." Her heel smashes the tray of instruments off its stand. Metal clatters across the floor.

"At least take the straps off," Kiyoshi murmurs. 

Chishiya reaches down. His fingers fumble against the buckle. The strap slackens. She jerks her arm away instantly. When the second strap comes off, she scoots up against the headboard.

"I understand you're upset. I don't blame you for being upset," Chishiya says calmly. "But you would've died if we hadn't done this. It'll be okay. One day, you'll be happy about this. You survived. You didn't actually want to die, right?"

"Why don't you understand?" She cries out. "That was never the problem! Of course I didn't want to die. The problem is you and Kiyoshi, who killed my best friend's daughter, taking me into a bunker, where the heart from our son's rapist is waiting, and you're immediately pulling out a sedative! If you would've let me stay at the hospital and gotten me a donated heart, I'd be much flexible."

Chishiya's face falls. "I told you we could maybe find a donated heart. You still refused—"

"Because you locked me in a bunker alongside him!" Baya screams, pointing at Kiyoshi who flinches at the sudden volume of her voice. "Because you pulled out a sedative out of nowhere! Because this whole place is scary! Look at it!" She motions around. At the walls covered in surgical tools and maps, at the trays of tools, and the desk where Kiyoshi had been putting the heart together, and the eerie blue lights. "I refused because the second I said no, both of you looked at each other like I was the problem. Not a person or your wife. A problem."

"You were dying. You didn't see your lips. They were completely blue, and your heartbeat was stuttering. If I'd waited even an hour longer—"

"Don't you dare use my body failing as an excuse for what you did. You chose to ignore me. You chose to put me under, strap me down, and cut me open. You say you love me, but you didn't love me enough to trust me with my own death."

"Do you think I wanted to hold you down? I did it because I and our children can't lose you."

"Do you know what you've taught Hana, Kaoru, and Sakiko, if they ever find out? That keeping someone alive is more important than respecting them. That a mother's body belongs to her husband if he thinks it'll save her. Is that what you want them to learn from you?" She smacks a fist against her chest. "This doesn't belong to me. How can I ever look at you again without feeling strapped to that bed? I am more than a set of lungs and a pulse. You saved my body and murdered my trust. And without trust, there is no us."

Chishiya's throat works like he might argue, but nothing comes out. His silence is worse than shouting back at her.

Baya scoots to the edge of the bed, her feet pressing against the cold bunker floor. Fury keeps her moving, even though it hurts. She pushes past him with a force that surprises even her. "Don't follow me," she hisses. "Don't you dare touch me again unless I ask you to. You've taken enough from me."

Kiyoshi blocks her way, then takes one look at her face and steps aside again. She staggers the door.

"Yuzuki..."

She doesn't grant him her eyes. "Congratulations. You've succeeded, just like you always do." With that, she leaves the bunker, slamming the door behind her. 

It feels like she's walking through a thick paste. Every breath is a shard of glass in her lungs. The bandages over her heart tug and pull. She hadn't thought it could hurt this much just to walk up some stairs.

Once she's back on the street, cold air rushes in, making her shiver. She has to drag herself forward as she wipes sweat and tears from her face.

The city seems endless. Her legs scream with exhaustion and her arms burn from the effort of keeping herself upright. Memories flash but she forces them aside. She cannot stop. She cannot think of anyone but reaching the hospital.

She pauses at a corner, leaning against the wall. The heart clicks, loud against her ears. Her chest aches. She swallows and forces herself onward. Her vision blurs. Every corner she turns feels like deja vu. From places where her kids used to play when she was younger to places where she walked with Niragi when they still lived together.

Halfway through, she collapses against a wall. She feels tears slipping down her cheeks. Pain radiates from her chest. She closes her eyes, then falls to her knees, crawling. The concrete scratches at her palm, but she barely notices. Her other hand is braced against walls.

When the hospital appears, her new heart beats faster, ticking against her ribs. She clutches it with one hand.

A bicycle wheel catches her sweater, sending her sprawling. She bites back a scream. Tears mix with blood and sweat. Her fingers drag over the cold asphalt as she pulls herself up.

She doesn't remember leaving the bunker. She doesn't remember how her legs carried her here, or if she had screamed at Chishiya again before stumbling out. Blindly, she just pushes the door to Kuina, Aguni, and Ann's shared room.

Kuina is sitting on her bed, touching her hair while looking at a mirror on the wall. Aguni is sharpening a knife. Ann is at the desk, filling pages with ink. They all look up at the sound of the door banging against the wall.

Kuina is on her feet instantly. "Baya?! What happened?"

"i can't... I can't—" Baya clutches at Kuina's shirt. "It's wrong inside me. It's not- it's not mine."

Kuina guides her to the bed. "Be careful. You're in pain. Tell me what happened."

Ann kneels in front of her. "Did someone attack you? Is it the wound from the stabbing?"

The clicking sound echoes again. "No. No, it's worse. He- he strapped me... no, they—" She can't sort the memories. The images bleed together: Chishiya's face above her, the straps pressing into her skin, Kiyoshi's hands, Niragi's hands, Yaba's breath in her ear. They all blur into one. "It's inside me!" she sobs, smacking her chest. "Something's beating but it's not mine. He made me. He wouldn't stop. I said no, I begged!"

Kuina wraps her arms around her. "Shh. You're safe here. You're safe with us. No one's going to touch you."

"Yuzuki. Who? Who did this?"

"I don't... I don't know!" Her answer comes with such despair that even she isn't sure if she's lying. Because she does know, doesn't she? But saying his name aloud makes it real. "It was him. Them. I can't—"

"What do you mean something's inside you?"

"Please, just take it out!" Baya sobs, clutching Ann's hands with a strength that surprises them both. "Please, it's wrong. It's not me anymore. Get it out, get it out of me."

"Honey, listen to me. We won't let anyone hurt you again. You're safe now. Just breathe. You'll be okay. We can fix this," Kuina assures.

"I was safe when I was with him too," she wails. "I trusted him. And now I can hear it, every beat, and it's not mine. It's not mine!" Her scream bounces off the walls before her strength gives out. She collapses against Kuina, sobbing. Her tears soak through Kuina's shoulder and her nails dig into Ann's hands. Aguni stands guard by the door.

"Baya," Ann says, "you have to tell us what happened. Where is Chishiya?"

Baya curls tighter into Kuina. "No... no, don't say it."

Kuina strokes her hair. "Are you saying he did this?"

"He said I needed a new heart because mine wasn't working after the stab," she whimpers. "He made a deal with- with H-Hotoke, and she'd give him a heart... and now he's put it inside of me, b-but I don't want it! I told him no! He didn't listen."

"Where is he now?"

"With Kiyoshi. They've been working together." Baya begins to sob again. "I know he just wanted to save me, but I feel so betrayed. He ignored me even as I begged," she sobs. "I don't want to be near him anymore."

"And you don't have to go near him again if you don't want to," Kuina promises.

"I'll talk to him," Aguni offers. His muscles pulse as he crosses his arms. "Alone."

Baya shakes her head. "No, don't—"

Kuina shoots Aguni a look. "No threats while she's like this."

"Baya's life might depend on him now," Ann says logically. "If he's the only one who understands what's inside her chest, we may need him to keep her alive."

"I don't want him. I don't want him near—"

Kuina hushes her. "Don't you dare say she needs him. He's not touching her again."

"Hey!" A knock from outside the door before it bursts open, revealing a panting Daishin. He pushes his glasses further up his nose.

"What is it now? We're busy."

He pushes a note inside Ann's hands. Baya peeks over Kuina's shoulder to read along.

I can see each player's status, Chishiya. Kaede Arisu isn't dead. You've lied to me. In ten days, I will attack your base and kill every single one of you unless you manage to fulfill one of my three wishes:
- Join a game with your wife.
- Kill Kaede Arisu for good.
- Bring me Kaoru.
Greetings, H.

"What the—" Kuina's eyebrows furrow. "What does she mean?"

"Shuntarō pretended to kill Kaede in order to get the heart. Hotoke wants him dead," Baya explains through hiccups.

"Chishiya is the one who drugged Kaede?"

She nods helplessly.

"Speaking of Kaede," Daishin interjects, "he's already awake."

"What?" Baya stands up fast, then falls back down, wincing in pain. "Is he okay?"

"Oh, he's fine. Already had a meal and walked around."

"Wait... how long was I gone for?" Baya frowns.

"Two days. Chishiya left a note saying you went to your house to gather supplies," Ann says. "We didn't think much of it at first. We assumed you spent the night at your house and the rest of the day to scavenge. Last night, we got more and more worried. Sakiko threw a tantrum."

"Oh, Koko," she whispers. "I want to see her. Is she okay? And what about Hana? She must've been so worried about Kaede—"

"They're okay. Let's get you in a wheelchair or something. Whether you want the heart or not, you should still rest." Kuina disappears into the hallway and comes back with a wheelchair. Aguni and Ann help Baya transport into it before they wheel her towards Sakiko, who's on a couch with a book in her hands.

The faintest hint of worry washes over her face when she sees her mother's blotchy face. "Mama? Are you okay?"

Baya nods. "Are you?" Is all she manages to whisper.

"Of course!"

Aguni sighs. "You don't have to act so unbothered, Koko. Just admit you missed her."

Sakiko looks between the three adults. Her bottom lip begins to tremble. She jolts forward, straight on top of Baya. "I thought you died! And Papa, too! Where is Papa?"

Baya's face darkens. She doesn't get the chance to say anything else, because Sakiko immediately catches up. "Are you fighting?"

"I..." Baya stammers at a loss for words. "Yes," she eventually admits. "We're fighting."

"Why?" Sakiko gasps. "Don't tell me he put you in that wheelchair."

She laughs awkwardly even though it's really nothing but the truth.

Once again, Sakiko reads her like a book. Her eyes wide. "He actually did? Mama, what did he do to you? Also, Kaede is awake and I saw him kiss Hana. It was scandalous, because I think I saw a tongue. Also, Reo accidentally touched Shirabi's bum and Shirabi almost choked him. And Kaoru won't stop starting at Suzume. It's really annoying."

Baya lips break into the smallest smile. "That's cute."

"It's not cute! Don't you understand, I don't want to see Kaede's tongue— oh, hi, Kaede." Sakiko waves at him as he walks through a door.

Baya spins her head around. "Kaede! Are you okay? How are feeling? Have you eaten enough?"

"Baya," he gulps, just as surprised. "You're back. Why... why are you in a wheelchair? What happened?"

"Shh," Kuina shushes him harshly, leaning in to whisper the entire story into Kaede's ear. His face falls, darkens, falls again, then settles into a disturbed expression. He shares a glance with Aguni.

"LC— woah, okay, whole meeting out here." Shirabi plops down on the couch next to her. "Look, I hate to break it to you— no I don't, I love it... anyway, I have to tell you something just to piss Reo off."

"Not the time."

He looks Baya up and down and shrugs. "But this is important."

"It can wait."

"No, it's important."

"Nothing you say is important," Sakiko mutters below her breath.

"But this is!" Shirabi yelps, not even denying the rest. "Trust me. You're gonna want to hear this."

She waves with her hand. "Go on."

"Kiyoshi is the baby's father," he blurts out.

Kaede chokes on his gum. Kuina and Baya's jaws drop. Ann and Aguni's eyebrows shoot up. Sakiko hits Shirabi's arm. "Funny."

"It's the truth. I swear. Go ask Mikasa. Apparently, she's his ex. He doesn't know about the baby and didn't see Mikasa when—"

"Shirabi, Kiyoshi just performed a surgery on Yuzuki without her consent," Aguni says lowly. "None of us care about him right now, and if Mikasa truly did, we would've known earlier on that he's the father."

"Why do you not look surprised at all?" Shirabi pouts. "I thought this would be like... an insane announcement."

"Read the room," Sakiko hisses.

Shirabi looks at Baya in her wheelchair again. "Let me guess, Chishiya tried to kill Kaede in order to gain something, but he somehow succeeded and failed at the same time, and now he's fighting with his wife for the millionth time. I've seen Kaede's dick more often than I've seen the two of you not argue."

Kaede wisely turns his back to Shirabi, face bright red. Sakiko sighs. "Still not the time."

"I do appreciate how you've started calling Kaede by his first name ever since Reo came along," Hana says sweetly, stepping towards them.

Shirabi's jaw clenches. "Shut up. I've been more intimate with your boyfriend than you have."

"You're proving her point," Sakiko whispers.

"Why are we even standing here?" Shirabi motions at the group. "Where the hell is Elikai? I swear, I haven't seen her in forever. Anyway—"

"We received a note from Hotoke," Daishin says formally. He hands the paper to Shirabi.

But Shirabi barely gets the chance to touch the paper: two figures walk out of the elevator. "Yuzuki?" Chishiya asks worriedly. His eyes flicker around the room. Kiyoshi follows him, and the only reasonable explanation for him being there is that he now knows about Mikasa and the baby.

They stop in front of the group. Chishiya opens his mouth at Baya, but she wheels away from him without hesitation. And so he focuses on Kaede instead. "You're awake."

"Yeah. You didn't use the right dosage to kill me," Kaede responds. His fists clench at his sides. He looks back at Baya. "How could you?"

"I did what I had to do in order to save her. Kaede, you're alive. That's what—"

"I don't care that you drugged me!" Kaede bursts. "I care that you did it without telling anyone about it. That you forced your wife into something she didn't want."

"I didn't have the luxury of explaining. I had seconds to act. She was dying. So I saved her."

"Look at her! Look what you did. You think that's saving?"

"She's alive. That's more than she would've been otherwise."

"You're always acting like you know better than everyone else. You never once think about how your decisions feel for anyone else. You don't respect anyone," Kaede snarls. "I'm so sick of it, Chishiya."

"You don't understand," Chishiya says. He almost looks sad. Almost. "Yuzuki would've died. There was no time to think of an alternative."

"You didn't save her for her. You saved her for you. Because you couldn't stand to let go. You think that's love?"

"You'll understand when you have someone you're willing to kill for. Apparently, you don't love Hana as much as I thought you did."

"I understand right now. You're selfish. You're a coward. And you've been making Baya suffer since the day you met her."

Chishiya's eyes narrow. "Careful."

"Careful? Or what?" Kaede steps closer. "You've spent years acting like I was unworthy of Hana. I could take it, because I thought you were just being protective. But this?" He jabs a finger toward Baya. "This is the last time. You've crossed a line."

The sound of his fist cracking against Chishiya's face echoes through the hospital room. He stumbles back and raises a hand to his jaw.

Kaede's knuckles fly again, colliding with Chishiya's jaw, his temple, and his mouth. With each punch, Kaede remembers every insult and every time Chishiya made Hana cry even when it was needed. Chishiya staggers back into the edge of a bed. Blood streaks down from his lip, and yet he doesn't swing back. He just takes it.

"Kaede, stop!" Sakiko shouts, trying to grab his arm, but Kaede shrugs her off.

"You're just a pathetic man who can't face losing the one person who still puts up with him!" He yells at Chishiya.

Blood splatters on Kaede's knuckles. Chishiya's silence infuriates Kaede more than words ever could.

His fists rain down on Chishiya's face. "You... always... looked... down... on me!" Kaede punctuates each word with a punch. "Every single time!" His fists slam against Chishiya again and again.

"Stop!" Sakiko sobs. She tries to cling to her father, but gets pushed out of the way. "Papa!" She yells. "Stop it! You're hurting him! Stop it, Kaede!" Desperate, the girl looks at Shirabi. "Make him stop!"

Shirabi shakes his head. "Not now."

Kiyoshi does move forward, shoving Kaede. "He's not worth it, Kaede!" he shouts. "Don't ruin yourself over him!"

Kaede's head whips toward Kiyoshi. He looks like he's about to punch him, too, until a different person cuts between them.

Aguni, the giant of a man storms forward. "You hurt Yuzuki," he spits at Kiyoshi. "And you killed my daughter."

The two hit the floor. Aguni straddles him, punching. Kiyoshi barely manages to shield his face before his arms give out. "I wasn't there— because of you!" He slams Kiyoshi's head into the floor.

Kaede spits blood off his lip and turns back to Chishiya, who is somehow still sitting upright, wiping crimson from his chin. He grabs Chishiya by the collar and drags him upright, their faces inches apart, then he yanks Chishiya to the ground, knee pressing into his chest as his fist cocks back again.

Sakiko's grips his arm. "Please don't be like this!"

Kaede's fist wavers. Then Aguni yells Nozomi's name again and slams hands slams down, reminding Kaede of all the messed up things that have happened. He punches Chishiya again.

Sakiko's sobs fade to the background. He doesn't even notice the baby screaming from across the room. All His fist crashes into Chishiya's face again. And again. The doctor's pale hair is streaked with red by now. Blood pours from his split lip, and his nose is crooked at an unnatural angle. His pupils are sluggish. He pushes at Kaede before going slack.

Kaede freezes as the realization hits him. Chishiya is out cold. He's nothing more than dead weight under his grip.

At the same time, Aguni continues. Kiyoshi sputters something, but Aguni doesn't stop to listen. His hand wraps around Kiyoshi's throat, choking off the sound as he pounds his other fist into his ribs until Kiyoshi's body stops resisting altogether. Without a word, he turns and strides out of the room.

Hana looks from Kiyoshi to Chishiya to Kaede as if she has to debate who she'll comfort, then she crouches in front of Kaede, cupping his face. "Are you okay?"

Kaede nods, panting, even though he's anything but okay. He's afraid to look at Shush's body, and something about Aguni storming off doesn't sit right.

The truth reveals itself minutes later: his footsteps return down the hall.

Aguni walks back to the others. In his hand glints a pair of scissors.

"Wait, what are you—"

Aguni doesn't answer. He strides past everyone, straight toward Kiyoshi's unconscious body.

Kaede stares, frozen in place. He wants to move, but his muscles refuse.

The scissors slice through the air, missing Kiyoshi's throat by inches when Hana shoves Aguni. The blade cuts across her forearm instead.

"Hana!" Kaede shouts, reaching forward. Still, his legs refuse to move. He stares at the others, helpless, but they either support Aguni's decision or are too weak to do anything about it. Suzume, who has shown surprising physical strength, is scavenging with Kaoru and Elikai. There's nothing to do.

Aguni grabs the scissors again. He lifts them above Kiyoshi's unconscious body.

Hana throws herself onto him from behind. She wraps her arms around his shoulders. "No!" she screams. "Don't do it, Aguni!"

Aguni thrashes. Her nails dig into his shirt as hard as she can. The scissors clatter to the floor again. "Let go!" He slams back against the wall, trying to crush her. The impact rattles her bones, but she doesn't release him. She digs her heels into his hips and leans backward. Aguni actually stumbles.

He drags her half across the room. Hana swings her weight sideways. The two of them crash down onto the floor. She lands on top. "Stop it!" she yells at him. "Stop before you become what you hate! You killed enough already! You don't get to decide who lives and dies just because you're hurting!"

Tears gather in the corner of his eyes, spilling against his temples. "You don't understand... Nozomi, she was—" He turns his head away from Hana.

"I do understand! But killing him won't bring her back! You'll only destroy what's left of yourself. And we can't lose you, too."

Aguni stares up at her until what's left is only a crying man pinned to the floor by a woman half his size. Hana's own arms give out. She presses her forehead pressed to his chest, sobbing. Aguni's hand lowers to rest on her back.

"Hana..." Kaede whispers. He can hardly believe what he's seeing. The one he loves most holding down the strongest man he's ever met.

She presses her face deeper into Aguni's shirt. "Nozomi wouldn't want you to do this," she whispers. "Don't make us lose you, too."

A noise escapes him, then he's crying. He embraces Hana tighter, shoulders shaking. In the corner of her eye, she catches Kuina pressing a hand to her mouth and turning away. Ann grips her hand tightly as a tear of her own trickles down.

Sakiko's cries have become quieter by now, but her rage not so much. She glares at Kaede with daggers in her eyes. Shirabi crouches down next to her. "LC," he says quietly, "you have to understand that what your father did and has been doing is bad. And sometimes... people just need to get beaten the hell out of them before they can realize that."

The girl looks back at her father. "Not even Mama helped him," she whispers. "He looked so sad. I felt really bad. He only wanted to save Mama, right, SD? Mama wouldn't be alive if he hadn't done it, even if it was wrong."

"I know, but... it's not just that. It's everything he does," he softens his voice even more. "Don't worry, though. He'll be fine and hopefully become better after this."

"He's the best papa in the world," Sakiko insists. "Even though he makes mistakes. But everyone makes mistakes. Why do we point his mistakes out so much?"

"Because he makes a lot of mistakes," Shirabi says dryly.

"But he also does good things! If we look from the positive side, he saved Mama and he didn't actually want to kill Kaede. He tricked Hotoke. And he raised me, and I'm the best person ever, so he did very well raising me."

"Right." Shirabi chuckles. "Whatever you say."

Then Sakiko pulls a face. "Where is Kaede going? And where is Mama?"

"Daishin wheeled her away during the fight. Kaede's probably going to play the victim and feel bad for beating your father up." Shirabi shrugs. "The usual."

And indeed. Kaede collapses onto his bed. There's image of Chishiya's face beneath his fists.
The blood that smeared across his knuckles.
The way Sakiko sounded when she screamed for him to stop.

The guilt sinks deep into his ribs. He tells himself he had to do it and that Chishiya deserved it.

But no matter what Chishiya did, Kaede can't erase the fact that he lost control. That he let his anger consume him until he became someone unrecognizable, even to himself.

Tears sting at his eyes. He buries his face into the pillow. The shame builds until it feels unbearable. The voice that whispers he's no better than the people he despises creeps in.

He pulls open the drawer by the bed. Shame swallows his hesitation whole, and he presses the blade against his wrist. The skin parts.

Kaede exhales, his tears falling harder. He feels disgusted with himself. "I'm sorry, Hana, I'm sorry..." He doesn't know if he wants to stop. It hurts so good.

The creak of the bedroom door is what makes him stop after all. "Kaede?"

Hana's eyes land on him. Her breath catches when she sees the thin red line on his wrist. "Oh."

Kaede quickly hides his arm. "I'm sorry, Hana. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, I just—" His words crumble into sobs. "I'm weak. I thought I was better. I thought I was done with this, but I ruined it. I ruined everything."

She cups his face, her thumbs brushing tears from his skin. "You are not weak. You've been fighting so hard. I know how hard it is. And I've been so proud of you, every single day, for how far you've gone without hurting yourself."

"But I failed," he whimpers.

"No. You had a moment. That doesn't erase all the progress you've made. One slip doesn't undo everything." She pries the blade from his grip, setting it far out of reach. Kaede is only able to stare at her with wide eyes.

Hana guides his arm into her lap. "Let me see."

Kaede shakes his head weakly. "It's nothing. Just... just leave it."

"I won't leave you," Hana murmurs, already pulling out the first-aid kit she keeps nearby, an old habit from growing up with Chishiya as a father. She dabs the cut clean. "I'll never leave you."

The sting makes Kaede flinch, but Hana is so gentle it almost feels like a caress. She wraps a bandage around his wrist. "See? All patched up. I'm proud of you, Kaede. You keep fighting even when it's hard and you stood up for yourself."

"I made you worry. Again."

"Of course I worry." She brushes damp strands of hair from his forehead. "I love you. I'll always worry."

He buries his face against her chest, sobbing so hard his whole body shakes.

Hana wraps her arms around him. "It's okay, Kaede. It'll be okay."

●・○・●・○・●

Sakiko doesn't wait for anyone else to take responsibility. She hooks her hands under her father's arms. Inch by inch, she drags him across the floor.

"No one's helping, so I'll do it myself," she mutters. "You're the best papa. You don't deserve to just lie here all beaten up by stupid Kaede."

She reaches an empty room. With one last grunt, she manages to roll him onto his back in the middle of a thin mat. She kneels beside him, rummaging through a cabinet until she finds a first-aid kit.

She opens the kit, pulls out gauze, alcohol wipes, and bandages. She knows she doesn't know exactly what she's doing, but she's people patch others up before. She presses a cloth against the cut above his eyebrow, wiping away the blood.

When she finishes, she sits beside him, staring, waiting. Minutes pass. Her eyelids droop, but she refuses to leave.

"Koko?"

She straightens immediately. "Papa! You're awake! I fixed you!" She gestures proudly at the bandages. "See? You're not allowed to die on me, so I patched you up."

Chishiya blinks slowly, taking in the room, then her face hovering so close. He raises a shaky hand to her cheek, his thumb brushing a smear of blood there. "You shouldn't have had to do that."

"You were lying there and no one else was helping," she says firmly. "So I did it. Don't look at me like that. You're alive, aren't you?"

"Alive because my daughter is stubborn."

"You scared me. You looked really broken. But you're not broken, right? You're still you."

"I did terrible things."

Her chest pangs. "You always say that. But you also did good things. And you're my papa."

"Every step, it feels like I've only made enemies. Hurt people who didn't deserve it. And still... I'd do it again. Because I can't stand the thought of losing her or my kids."

"So you feel bad, but also like you did the right thing?"

"Yes."

"Then maybe you just need to get better at choosing which things you do. Like... make a list. Good papa things. Bad papa things. Do more of the good ones."

His chuckle escapes before he can stop it. "You make it sound so simple."

"It is simple. You just make it complicated because you think too much."

He slowly sits up, wincing. "You're too smart for eleven," he murmurs.

"You're too dumb for—"

"Shh. I'm still twenty-four."

Sakiko giggles. Then she becomes serious again. "Papa... why didn't you fight back? When Kaede was hitting you?"

His eyes drift toward the ceiling. Sakiko tugs lightly at his sleeve.

"Papa," she insists. "You never let anyone hurt you like that before. You're always smart. You always win. But you just... let him."

"Because I deserved it," he says.

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did. I've been lying, manipulating, and playing games with people's lives. Kaede was right to be angry. If I let him hit me, it would balance things out a little."

Her brows knit together. "That's dumb."

"Maybe it is."

Her hands grip his shoulders with all the force she can muster. "You're my papa. If you think you need punishment, then let me do it. Not Kaede. He doesn't get to decide that."

"That's not how it works."

"Then how does it work?"

"I don't know. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe people like me... we just collect debts. And eventually, someone comes to collect."

"But you're not just people like you," she argues. "You're Papa. You're mine. And if someone comes to collect, I'll fight them."

He's caught off guard by the ferocity in her voice. "You shouldn't have to fight for me."

"I want to."

"You're too good for me, Koko."

"No, I'm just the right amount of good. And you're just the right amount of bad. That's why we fit."

"Then I'll try," he murmurs into her hair.

She nods against him, satisfied with that promise. "What about Mama? I know what you did. How are you going to fix it?"

"I don't know if I can," he admits.

"You have to," she presses on. "She's Mama. She loves you. And you love her. Don't you?"

"Of course I do. That's why I couldn't let her go."

"Then tell her that," she says simply. "Tell her you love her. And tell her you're sorry for making her feel like she didn't have a choice. Because you always tell me the worst thing is when people take away choices."

"I can't undo what I did. Even if I apologize, she might never forgive me. She might never look at me the same way again."

"Then you keep trying!"

"You're too much like her," he murmurs.

"Good. Maybe that means you'll listen to me. But You know Mama won't care about just 'sorry,' right?"

"I'm aware," Chishiya mutters. His voice is flat, but his face gives him away: there's tension.

Sakiko nods wisely. "So we need something big. Something awesome. Something that shows her you mean it. Idea number one: flowers."

"She'll throw them at me," Chishiya says instantly.

"Okay, not flowers. Idea number two: a big cake. Like, huge. With whipped cream."

"She'll also throw that at me"

Sakiko huffs. "Fine, idea number three: a necklace. Very expensive. She likes those."

"She'll accuse me of trying to buy her forgiveness."

"Papa, you're the worst client ever." She flops onto her stomach, glaring at him. "Okay, then what would work? What does Mama actually like?"

"Freedom," he guesses.

"Then give her that."

"I took it from her. Do you know how impossible it is to give someone back what you stole like that?"

"You're supposed to be the smart one," Sakiko says bluntly. "Figure it out."

"I don't know if I can."

"Then make it awesome enough that she knows you want to try."

"Yo, LC!" Shirabi leans against the doorframe. "What the hell are you two doing? Looks like some weird cult."

Sakiko beams. "We're fixing Papa and Mama's marriage! Planning ways for him to apologize."

Shirabi snorts. "That's easy. Tie her up, blindfold, couple hours later she'll forgive you for anything."

"Ew! SD! That's disgusting!"

"That one works. Trust me. She'll love it."

Chishiya looks up, dry as sand. "She won't."

"Fine." Shirabi lifts his hands. "Idea two—"

"STOP!" Sakiko screams, covering her ears. "You're ruining the plan!" She kicks him in the shin so hard he actually winces. "Go away if you're gonna be gross!"

"What? Women love that stuff." Shirabi waggles his brows. "You set the mood, whisper apologies while—"

"SD!" Sakiko cuts him off with a horrified look. "She is my mama! Ew!"

"How do you think you were created?"

"It didn't involve blindfolds!" Sakiko yells. Then, very slowly, she turns to her father. "At least, I hope," she whispers, petrified.

"Be appropriate, Shirabi," Chishiya warns.

Shirabi shrugs. "Appropriate doesn't work on women like Baya. She's fire. You gotta fight fire with fire, right?"

"You fight fire with water."

"You get what I mean."

"I really don't," Sakiko murmurs.

"She's traumatized," Chishiya interrupts sharply.

"And whose fault is that?"

Sakiko places her small hand on his arm, ignoring Shirabi. "That's why we're helping, Papa," she says. Then, shooting Shirabi a glare: "So unless you can stop being gross, don't help."

Shirabi whistles. "Alright, alright. I just had to find a way to get rid of Reo. I've always wanted someone to be obsessed with me, but he is so annoying..."