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CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE,
a dog and a monster

-

༇ "DON'T you dare."

Chishiya, Usagi, Kuina, Ann, and Heiya are gathered in the living room of the Arisu house, Miyu and Souta long asleep upstairs.

Chishiya simply blinks at Usagi's words. "Give me a reason."

"For starters, you could die."

One eyebrow raises. "A good reason," he corrects.

"Baya would also die. Her heart might not stop beating, but..." Usagi trails off. "Just don't go there."

"There are two possibilities." Chishiya stands up, walking around as if giving a presentation. "Is your fate decided here, or in the Borderlands?"

Heiya frowns. "What?"

"Let's see... take Tatta," Chishiya goes on. "Did the meteorite kill him, and was it only a matter of time before he died in the Borderlands, or could he have lived in the real world, if he wouldn't have sacrificed himself? Either way, his fate would've been sealed."

"Your point?"

"If our fate gets sealed in the Borderlands, it's an advantage. If I would make my own heart stop beating to go there, I'll only have to make sure I survive. But if your fate gets sealed in real life, then it doesn't matter what you do in the Borderlands: you'll die."

"The Borderlands are about fighting for your life," Ann interrupts. "Obviously, your fate gets decided in the Borderlands."

"Ah, good. We're technically immortal." Chishiya sits back down, rubbing his chin. "If one of us dies from old age, would we get sent to the Borderlands? If yes, and if we survive, wouldn't we return to the real world?" He pauses. "That makes me think our fate is sealed in real life, not in the Borderlands."

"Whatever." Kuina throws her hands up. "We can't do anything but wait. Do not try to make your heart stop beating."

"I won't."

He walks home without another word. The door to the house shuts behind him with a click. Silence swells through the space. It's clean, surgical, cold, just like everything he is and owns.

He walks inside, shedding his jacket onto the back of a chair. Moonlight casts a silver hue through the window. It brushes across the floor, barely touching the corner of the medical cabinet he'd locked long ago.

Tonight, he opens it. Inside are leftover supplies from a time he rarely talks about. His fingers hover over the vial labeled Euthasol before he picks it up.

Chishiya places the vial on the table. Beside it, he lays out a letter next to it, one that consists of so many paragraphs that his hand had started aching when he wrote it. He signs it to make it real.

A few moments pass as he stares at the signature. Then he reaches for the syringe, draws the clear liquid into the barrel, and taps it twice. He finds a vein. closes his eyes, and he presses the plunger.

●・○・●・○・●

Kaede stirs awake to the sound of birds—well, not birds. Something. Something chirping outside. His arm is completely asleep from Hana sleeping on it, her legs tangled in his, her breath soft.

The room is dim, with morning light creeping between the slats of the window. Dust floats in the beams.

Kaede allows himself a moment. One second of peace. But then he opens his eyes.

Chishiya stands at the foot of the bed. Hands in his coat pockets. Expression unreadable. His eyes locked directly onto Kaede.

Kaede freezes. He blinks once. Chishiya doesn't vanish.

Nope. Not a dream.

So gently it would impress trained assassins, he starts to lift Hana's arm from around his chest.

"Mm... Kaede?" she murmurs sleepily.

"Shhh. Go back to sleep. Dream of puppies. Do not open your eyes," he whispers.

Hana groans in confusion and rolls over.

Kaede sits up stiffly, heart hammering. He gives Chishiya a sheepish smile. "Hey. Shush."

Chishiya blinks. "Don't call me that."

Kaede slowly stands from the bed. "Okay, okay. Let's be calm. Let's not forget that you're a doctor, and I am your daughter's..." He hesitates. "...bed warmer."

Chishiya's eyes narrow. "Out."

"What?"

"Out."

Kaede squeaks. "Okay!" He grabs his clothes, throwing them on awkwardly as Chishiya turns and walks out the door without another word.

Kaede follows.

This is fine, he tells himself. This is fine. He's probably just here to talk. Just talk. In a murdery tone. With scalpel metaphors. And maybe an actual scalpel.

Outside, the air is chilly. The grass is wet. The sky has an orange tint.

Chishiya keeps walking. Kaede jogs to catch up. "So! You're alive! Or, uh, back! Great to see you. Did you die on purpose? Just checking."

No answer.

They reach an open parking lot, far from the house.

Chishiya stops and turns. Kaede immediately takes a step back.

"Your arm was around my daughter."

"It was! I mean—yes! But platonically."

"She was drooling on your chest."

"People drool in their sleep! It's very natural and—"

"You were shirtless."

Kaede raises a finger. "Technically clothes aren't a norm, and I know you'd agree with me ever since I found out about your interactions with my father—"

"You're cuddling her. And you're in the Borderlands. Do you know what that means?"

"That we're going to die horribly?"

"That she'll die horribly because of you."

"I'm not trying to let her die," Kaede whispers. "I would take a bullet for her."

"You'll get her shot before you have the chance," Chishiya snaps.

"I miss when you were just silently judging me from the sidelines."

"I miss when you weren't cuddling Hana."

Kaede looks at the ground. His eyebrows scrunch. He bites the inside of the cheek. Then he looks back up. "You know what?"

Chishiya barely even blinks.

"I could push you over with one finger and knock you out with two," he says dramatically, crossing his arms in defense.

"Excuse you—"

"Who killed the King of Spades?" Kaede grabs Chishiya's finger and plants it on his chest. "That's right. It was me."

"Get my finger off your body."

"Yes, sir," he says quickly, letting go of Chishiya's hand and stepping back. "I was kidding, of course! I wouldn't knock you out with two fingers. I wouldn't even try to knock you out."

"And you didn't kill the King of Spades. Yes, yes."  Chishiya waves it off. "I—"

Kaede lightly clears his throat.

Chishiya stops.

They stare at each other. 

"Don't tell me..."

"...yeah."

Chishiya stares at him even longer.

"And I did not need one of your crafty little bombs," Kaede adds.

"Is that so?"

"Uh-huh. And I beat Aguni in a fight. And I graduated from the best martial arts university in Japan."

"Your point?"

"Do not try to kill me."

"I had no trouble injecting euthanasia in my own body. Injecting it in yours would be a pleasure."

"Wow. Okay. You're that kind of dead."

"Thank you for the sentiment."

"That's not what I meant."

"Then be more articulate. You sound like a dog trying to talk."

Kaede throws his hands up. "How do you manage to insult me without raising your voice?"

"Practice," Chishiya replies. "A lot of people are very easy to insult."

"Oh, come on!" Kaede groans. "I woke up with your daughter in my arms, the sun rising, and boom, suddenly I'm facing you, who injected himself with euthanasia!"

"Professionally."

"That's not how it works."

Chishiya shrugs. "Except it worked."

"Can we just talk like two normal men? Without the threat of murder, aggression, or, I don't know, death?"

"You think I'm going to believe that you, the spawn of Arisu, are a normal man?"

"I resent that implication."

Chishiya raises an eyebrow.

"...Okay, I slightly understand that implication."

Chishiya taps his chin. "I should've killed your father when I had the chance."

"I think everyone says that at some point."

They glare at each other.

Kaede drops his arms. "Look... I get it. You love her. I love her. But unlike you, I'm not going to stand ten feet away and pretend I don't care. She needs people. I'm not trying to take Hana away from you. I just want to be close enough so that if she falls, I'm the one who catches her. That's it."

There's a long silence.

Chishiya's gaze doesn't waver.

"Your shirt is inside out," he then says.

Kaede looks down. "Shit."

"Pathetic."

"I was rushed! Your death glare stressed me out."

Chishiya sighs.

Kaede adjusts his shirt. "You know, one day, you're going to say something that actually hurts me."

"I already have. Repeatedly."

"Well, yeah, emotionally. But I meant physically. Like, you'll throw a scalpel at me or something."

Chishiya eyes him sidelong. "Tempting."

"I knew it!" Kaede points again, triumphant. "You've thought about it."

"I don't think about it. I plan for it."

Kaede snorts. "Do you have a scalpel right now?"

Chishiya's silence is enough.

"You are a tiny, bleach-headed guy. I'm not afraid to say it."

Chishiya shrugs, unbothered, gaze flicking briefly toward the horizon. "Anything else to say, or are we done with this tragic Shakespearean session?"

"Yeah, actually." Kaede folds his arms. "I just want you to know I could've totally kissed Hana this morning. But I didn't. Because I have restraint."

"You think that's restraint?"

"She drooled on me."

"That's the only reason, isn't it?"

"It factored in heavily."

Chishiya closes his eyes. "You are an affliction."

Kaede opens his mouth to retort, but stops. He makes a soft, surprised sound. His expression is blank for just a moment, eyes wide and mouth parted as he leans forward into Chishiya's space.

Chishiya recoils slightly. "Are you trying to hug me—"

Kaede collapses against him. Full weight. Chishiya stumbles backward a step, catching him more out of reflex than intent. He thinks it's some exaggerated, dramatic hug. Maybe Kaede's pulling some weird gesture. Maybe he's crying. That would be awkward.

"Kaede," Chishiya mutters. "What the hell are you—"

He feels the warmth soaking into his coat.

Kaede's legs give out. Chishiya crouches down with him, the boy's face buried weakly against his shoulder.

It's not just a little blood. It's dark and rapid pouring from somewhere beneath Kaede's shoulder blades. It stains Chishiya's front in seconds. A slick across his shirt is now torn, soaked in blood.

Chishiya checks it: three slashes. Straight through muscle, missing the spine by inches.

Kaede's fingers twitch. His mouth moves, but no words come out, just a choked breath.

Chishiya rips the shirt aside and presses his hand to one of the wounds, blood soaking between his fingers. It's pumping too fast. He looks around, scanning the trees, the road, the path, yet there's no sign of the stabber.

Kaede coughs. A dark smear appears at the corner of his lips.

"Kaede."

His eyes flutter, rolling slightly before they drag back to focus. He swallows hard, neck trembling with the effort. "Did... you... do that?" He whimpers.

"No."

"Good. Because I was like... seventy percent sure." Kaede manages a weak laugh before he seizes: body curling, blood bubbling in his throat. His face has lost all color.

"Who? Who did this? Did you get any new enemies here? No one would randomly stab you and leave me alive."

Kaede doesn't answer, because he doesn't know. He gasps for air.

"If you die, I have to explain this to Yuzuki. Then Hana. Then your idiot father. And I don't like any of those conversations."

It's getting worse by the second. His eyes flutter shut again, and Chishiya doesn't bother calling his name this time. He shifts, hauling Kaede upright with a grunt of effort. Kaede lets out another gasp.

"On your feet."

Kaede doesn't respond.

Chishiya drags him upright anyway. "I said, on your feet. You're walking."

Kaede's knees buckle immediately. Chishiya catches him by the front of his ruined shirt, yanking him up again. "You think I'm carrying you to the hospital?" he snaps furiously. "What am I, your personal slave? You're walking, Kaede. If you don't, I'm leaving you here."

Kaede's head droops forward. A sound escapes him. The boy is barely standing   He tries to breathe, fails, and wheezes in a mouthful of air instead. His knees buckle again.

"Please," Kaede mumbles.

Chishiya lets go just like that.

Kaede crumples to the dirt, hitting the ground. He lies there for a second, motionless except for the rise of his shoulders.

Chishiya stares down at him. "Crawl, then."

"...W-what?"

"You heard me. You want to live? Prove it."

Kaede looks up at him. His face is pale, blood smeared down his jaw. "Please," he rasps. "I can't even feel my legs—"

"Then drag yourself."

Chishiya doesn't offer a shoulder or a hand or even an insult to cling to.

Kaede tries to push up with his arms. He slips. Groans. His fingers shake too hard to find something to hold onto. One elbow gives out and he drops, face first, into the ground. The blood leaves a print where his cheek hits the ground.

Chishiya walks away. Not far, but enough to make his point.

Kaede is on his own. He whimpers something and tries again. One elbow forward. Then the other. He drags himself across the ground, leaving a trail behind him.

Chishiya walks a step ahead, not looking back. Never offering a hand. Because if he helps Kaede now, he acknowledges what's already too obvious: that he cares.

So Chishiya walks.

And Kaede crawls after him. Sobbing under his breath. Gasping. Dragging one arm forward at a time.

"Y-you're..." Kaede coughs, spitting red. "You're a monster..."

The trip to the clinic takes nearly forty minutes. Thirty-nine of those minutes, Kaede spends moving inch by inch on his stomach. He bleeds the entire way. He's almost unconscious by the time they reach the hospital.

Chishiya finally glances back.

Kaede is slumped against the doorframe, cheek pressed to the wooden step. He's panting so hard it looks like he's going to die from that instead of blood loss.

Chishiya kneels. Picks Kaede up by the shirt again. Hauls him inside like a bag of waste after making him crawl like a dog.

Kaede groans once as he's dropped onto the table, then he goes still.

The man tears away the remnants of Kaede's shirt, rolling him fully onto his stomach. Blood wells again from the three stab wounds. He snaps on gloves. Unwraps an emergency kit. Metal instruments clatter onto the tray.

A single candle burns in the corner. It's not enough light, but he's worked under worse.

"Count yourself lucky," he mutters as he threads a needle. "No one from your group would be able to help you properly."

"Your wife... would be able to," Kaede says, struggling with each word.

With everything he has, he lifts his head to glare at Chishiya, eyes narrowed. "So you better save me. She's already upset with you. Imagine if she finds out you let me die."

"What did you just say to me?"

"I said, your Yuzuki will never forgive you if you don't get to work right now. I might..." Kaede gasps for air. "...tell her how you let me crawl." 

Chishiya goes still. There's a glint in his eye sharp enough to cut bone.

Kaede doesn't flinch. He can't flinch. He's barely breathing. But his gaze holds steady.

Chishiya reaches down, places a hand firmly on Kaede's shoulder, and presses down.

Kaede jerks, breath catching in his throat.

"You think this is the time to test me?" Chishiya asks, voice low.

"I think," Kaede wheezes, "that if I die on this table, you'll have to look Yuzuki in the eye and explain how you made me crawl here instead of helping. And then you'll have to explain it to Hana and Kaoru and Sakiko. And then to yourself." Kaede's breath hitches. Blood runs down the table edge in slow drips. "So go ahead. Save me."

That does it. He gets to work. Chishiya cuts into the skin around the wound. The candlelight flickers against his profile: jaw locked, brows drawn low, mouth tense.

"You were lucky," he says after a long silence.

Kaede lets out something between a laugh and a groan. "Sure doesn't feel like it."

Chishiya doesn't look at him. "If the blade was angled even one degree closer to the spine, you'd be paralyzed. Another half-centimeter and I'd be sawing off a limb."

"Is that... what you told her after... stabbing her in the back?"

Chishiya jabs a needle into Kaede's skin, sharper than necessary. Kaede yelps.

"Consider that a sedative." Chishiya finishes the stitches. Begins cleaning the blood with a soaked cloth.

Kaede shifts, wincing again. "So. I'm gonna live?"

"If you're lucky."

He wipes his hands off. Looks down at the boy. "You ever say Yuzuki's name like that again," Chishiya says calmly, "and I'll open you back up just to see if your brain's really in there."

"You'll have to catch me first."

"I won't have to. You crawl like a snail that got stepped on."

Kaede, too tired to fake a laugh, just whispers, "Still beat Aguni..."

Chishiya rolls his eyes and moves to prep another round of gauze.

"...with my bare hands..." Kaede mutters, fading out.

●・○・●・○・●

By the time twilight is falling, everyone is well aware of Kaede's absence ever since Hana woke up to an empty spot beside her. They looked far, and yet not far enough to see the long trail of blood from the parking lot to a hospital.

"Maybe he joined a game and it's like that Brown Joker game we once played." Baya motions at her and Arisu, although it's only an excuse to reassure him. "I'm sure he's okay. He won't walk straight into danger— okay, he would, but he doesn't have a reason to, so at the moment, he wouldn't. Not after accomplishing such a big milestone with Hana, am I right?"

"Right," Arisu mutters, but he also doesn't sound convinced.

"He's just trying to calm himself down because he touched Hana for more than three seconds," Shirabi says. Even his voice sounds uncertain.

"Should we continue looking?"

"No. It's night. That's when most games take place. It might he dangerous out there. Wouldn't want to walk into an arena—"

The front door opens, and two figures step through.

All of them turn.

Kaede lifts a hand in a shaky wave, his face pale, but other than that, carries no other visible signs of the wounds on his back. "Hi."

Baya's gaze finds Kaede first. She starts to move forward when she sees the loss of color in his face.

"Don't worry," Kaede mutters. "I'm fine. Mostly."

Then she sees who's next to him.

She freezes.

Chishiya stares back at her, not breaking eye contact. Baya's breath catches in her throat. Her mouth opens as if she's about to say his name, but she stops.

A full second passes before she turns away without a word. She walks past everyone. Up the stairs.

Kaede watches her disappear, then glances sideways at Chishiya, his brow furrowing.

"You didn't tell her you're here yet?"

"No."

"She really didn't know you were here—"

"I said no."

No one moves, not even Chishiya. He just stands in the doorway. His hands hang loose by his sides. His face gives away nothing.

Then finally, Sakiko recovers from the shock of seeing him and runs straight into his arms. "Dad!"

They share a quick hug, one that's already a big accomplishment for them both. Chishiya's eyes trail to Kaoru, who's trying not to make eye contact, and then to Hana, who's doing the exact same.

"I won't talk to you until you make it up with Mom," Kaoru says stiffly.

Chishiya looks up as if he can see Baya through the ceiling. "I'll be back."

Slowly, he makes his way up the stairs, to their bedroom, and knocks on the closed door.

"Unless you're here to apologize—"

"I'm here to apologize," he interrupts.

"Don't cut me off. I'm sick of that, too."

"I'm sorry."

"Is that all you got?"

"No, that's just my apology for cutting you off." His fingers wrap around the door knob. "Can I come in?"

"...Fine," she sighs.

He slowly opens the door and closes it behind him. Their bedroom is dim, lit only by a few candles. The bed is unmade, a hint that Chishiya hasn't been here for a while, and half of Baya's closet is on the floor. She's sitting on the bed, a pillow clutched tightly in her hands. She refuses to look at him.

"I am furious with you," she says.

"I know."

"And I want you to listen to me right now."

"I will."

She stands up from the bed but continues holding the pillow. "From now on, you will not complain about anything I do. You will not complain when I prepare an activity, when I cook food, or when I say something. And if you actually have a good reason to complain, you will not do it in front of other people. You will talk to me in private and you will do it nicely. Noted?"

"Noted."

"You will defend me from anything and anyone, even your own children. Especially your own children."

"Noted."

"You will show me love the way I like it, not just the way you like it. I show you love in ways you like. Why would you not do the same for me?"

"Noted."

"You will stop being so work-obsessed and focus more on your family. Kaoru and Hana will be moving out of the house soon, if we even get out of here, but I expect you to still be there for Sakiko, and still be my husband."

"Noted."

"And now I expect you to come up with a proper explanation. You treated me well for a long time. However, more and more, I started to get annoyed with your complains. With our bickering sessions. And then you pretty much neglected me. Why is that? Do you not love me as much anymore? Is my body ugly after carrying three of your children?" 

"No." He steps further into a room. "It's nothing like that, and I didn't realize how I had been acting until you pointed it out. It's not something I consciously chose to do."

"Is it work? Did you get too obsessed with it?"

"No."

"Then what?"

He takes a moment before he responds. "After you confronted me, I realized the problem. Or... problems. Anticipation of loss, post survival, and testing—"

"Shuntarō, please. I have no idea what all that means. Elaborate."

"Anticipation of loss: over the years, I've become scared to lose you, and wanted to make it hurt less if I pushed you away. Post survival: I feel like I can't do anything to show my love towards you in other ways than saving you in the Borderlands. And testing your limit: I do not deserve you and probably wanted to see how far you'll go before giving up on me."

Baya blinks. "Why didn't you tell me this the first time we argued? Or the second time?"

"I did not realize why I was acting that way until I analyzed it closely. And also, I got too comfortable with the bickering. We always do it. I didn't realize it could hurt you, but now I understand. Bickering is okay, but not if it's about something you like or are excited for."

A small smile forms on her face. "I'm going to forgive you way too easily, so let me bring the next thing up: you constantly make me seem like I'm useless, and the kids have taken that mindset. Why, and why did you never stop Sakiko from hurting me?"

Chishiya's expression shifts. His gaze drops to the floor for a beat before returning to her. "That," he says, "is harder to admit."

"Try."

"I never meant to make you feel useless. I didn't even realize that's what I was doing. But... I know what you're talking about."

"Why didn't you stop?" Her voice cracks. "You heard and saw what Sakiko kept saying to me."

"I know."

"And you said nothing."

"I know."

"So why?"

He stops pacing. Finally, he looks at her fully. "Because I thought I was protecting her."

"...Protecting her from what?" she asks, voice laced with disbelief.

"From the disappointment I thought I'd become." He speaks slowly. "I've always known I'm not the best father. I don't play. I don't share emotions easily. I don't know how to bond the way you do. So I thought if I could keep her on my side—if she thought I was the one who had all the answers. maybe she'd never question it. Or me."

Baya stares at him.

"I let her mimic me," he goes on. "I let her pick up on my attitude. And every time she repeated it—toward you, or others—I saw it as proof she looked up to me. That I was still useful in some way. That I still had influence. And the more she mirrored me, the more I kept quiet."

"That's twisted."

"It is," he agrees. "But it's the truth. And I'm ashamed of it."

Baya walks to the other side of the bed, setting the pillow down. Her hands are trembling slightly, but her voice remains firm. "I have defended you," she says. "To everyone. Always. When the kids said you didn't care? I defended you. When friends said you were cold? I defended you. And you let your daughter humiliate me," she finishes, quietly. "So you could feel relevant."

He looks like she's just punched him in the gut. "I'm sorry," he says again.

"I don't want an apology." Her voice softens, but only by degrees. "I want change. You need to talk to her. You need to explain to her that I'm not someone to be dismissed. And not just because I'm your wife. Because I'm her mother. Because I've raised her. Loved her. Protected you both."

"I will."

"And you will start undoing the mindset you built in this house," she says.

"I will."

"And if I plan a picnic, or a stupid game, or a movie with snacks and—"

"I'll show up," he says. "I'll help set it up. I'll make the snacks."

Baya tilts her head, a faint smile rising. "Will you make them sarcastically?"

"Yes," he replies dryly. "But I'll make them anyway."

A long beat of silence follows. Her eyes search his, looking for cracks: false promises. But for once, Chishiya lets it all show.

With more gentleness than he's shown in years, he reaches out, taking one of her hands in both of his. "I love you," he says quietly. "Not in the way I used to. In a bigger way. You've grown more on me than I ever expected, and I think part of me was afraid I couldn't keep up."

She looks at their hands. "Then run faster, even if you hate it."

He huffs a faint laugh. "Okay."

"And what about Sakiko?" she asks, wary again. "What are you going to say to her?"

"I'm going to tell her she's been wrong and I've been wrong. That she picked up all the worst parts of me. That the person she thinks is unimpressive is the only reason any of us are still a family."

Baya nods slowly. Then leans in, resting her forehead against his chest. It takes him a second, but he wraps his arms around her.

"I knew you'd show up eventually," she murmurs. "You've become quite predictable."

"Fair."

His arms remain around her, more secure than they've felt in years. Baya doesn't pull away. She lingers against his chest, her breath syncing with his. The candlelight paints their faces with soft gold.

Slowly, she lets go of the pillow she'd been gripping and lets it fall to the floor. She turns her head, her cheek resting against his shoulder. The silence stretches again, but it's no longer uncomfortable.

"Do you remember the first night we slept in the same bed, in this house? After we bought it, when Kaoru was on the way?" she asks quietly.

"You fell off the bed twice."

"I was adjusting. You had no idea how to share a blanket."

"You still hog it."

"You're cold, so it doesn't matter."

He smiles a small smile. "You fell asleep with your head on my chest," he says. "And I remember thinking... this can't last. It's too peaceful."

Her smile fades a little at that, not because it's sad, but because it's true. "And it didn't. Not always."

"But it came back."

"I just wish it didn't have to be so hard."

Chishiya gently guides them down onto the bed. He lies on his back and she shifts with him, settling into the crook of his arm. She rests her head on his chest, her hand splayed over his heart. He strokes her hair.

"Back then... we got good at surviving, but not always at living."

"We'll fix that," he murmurs.

"You promise a lot for someone who doesn't believe in promises."

"I believe in you."

She goes quiet at that. They stay like that for several minutes. The exhaustion pulls at them both, but neither is ready to let sleep take them just yet.

Ultimately, she tilts her head up to look at him. Chishiya meets her gaze without hesitation. There's no coolness in his eyes tonight. He lifts a hand to her cheek, brushing his thumb just beneath her eye before kissing her.

It's slow, almost cautious. Lips brushing lips. But the moment she presses back, the dam breaks: he pulls her in, hand slipping behind her neck, holding her like she might disappear again if he lets go. She moves with him, shifting fully on top of him, her knees on either side of his hips. Her fingers slide onto his neck as she deepens the kiss.

Chishiya's other hand finds her waist, holding her so tightly that it may cause another one of those hip bruises. The kiss stretches on, making them breathless.

When they finally break apart, it's just to breathe. He looks up at her, dazed, voice husky. "You're really going to forgive me this easily?"

"No. I'm just kissing you now. The forgiving part starts tomorrow."

"Fair," he echoes.

Their lips find each other again and again. Chishiya rolls them around so that he's on top. His breath is warm against her jaw as he kisses a path down her neck.

Baya rolls back onto him, straddling his hips. "My turn," she says with a grin.

But Chishiya is nothing if not stubborn. With a sudden motion, he flips them.

"Oh no," she mutters.

"Absolutely yes."

He pins her wrists gently beside her head, leaning over her. She wriggles beneath him, half protesting, half laughing.

"Not fair. You had leverage!"

"I had strategy."

She twists, and before he knows it, she's flipped them again. "You forget I'm not as stiff as you."

"I never forget anything." He moves fast, rolling them once more. This time, she squeals through her laughter.

"You little—"

Another flip. She's back on top.

"I was winning!"

"You were gloating!"

They go back and forth like that, rolling and shifting, laughing into each other's mouths. At one point, she manages to roll them both so that she pins his arms, victorious. He raises an eyebrow at her. "You win?"

"Obviously."

They continue. He kisses her like he's starving and she lets him, kissing back just as hungrily. Her tongue moves against his while her other hand rests over his chest, feeling the steady beat beneath her palm.

He pulls back a few inches. "Okay?"

She nods. "More than."

Chishiya's hands slide down her arms, featherlight, brushing over the edge of her hoodie. She tilts her chin to kiss his throat, and he closes his eyes as if stunned by the sensation. Her fingers curl at the hem of his shirt, waiting. When he nods slightly, she lifts it. The fabric pulls up over his head. He lets it fall to the side.

Baya presses a kiss to the center of his chest. He exhales. Then his hands return to her waist.

She nods. He unzips her hoodie halfway, revealing the softness of her skin beneath. He brushes his knuckles over her side first. When she lifts her arms, he finishes removing the hoodie, then her shirt. Piece by piece. His hands are steady, though his breath hitches once when she's lying before him in nothing but her bra.

"Say something."

"What?"

"I really like it when you tell me I'm beautiful," she admits. Her cheeks grow red at the confession.

"You are."

"That's it?"

"Tell me what you want."

"I want you to show me you love me the way I show you," she says. "Not quietly. I want you to say it. I want to be adored the way I've adored you."

"You are the most beautiful woman I've ever known."

"Now that's what I mean." She smiles.

"You have a ridiculous effect on me and you do it without even trying."

She blinks, stunned as he keeps going.

"Your eyes," he says, brushing a thumb under one. "Do you have any idea what it's like to be seen by them? Your hands—" he takes one "—are the only place I've ever felt completely safe." He kisses her hand, then presses it to his chest. "And your laugh..."

Her eyes are practically becoming heart-shaped as she listens to him.

"Your strength doesn't come from how loud you are. It comes from how deeply you love people, how you fight for them, even when they're too foolish to deserve it. Like me."

Baya's lips quiver.

"And your body?" he adds, his gaze trailing gently. "There is nothing more breathtaking."

She looks at him like he's just rewritten the universe. And in a way, maybe he has.

"You're beautiful," he finishes. "Utterly. And I've been an idiot not to tell you that every day."

Baya exhales shakily, her hand reaching up to his cheek. She pulls him down into another kiss. "I missed this," she breathes.

"I missed you," he replies.

Her lips brush his jaw. "Then why did you disappear with Kaede today?"

Chishiya hesitates. His delay is enough to pull her back slightly. "Shuntarō?" Her voice turns cautious. "What did you two do?"

Chishiya hesitates. He kisses her again instead of answering.

"Don't stall," she says softly, pulling back just enough to look him in the eyes. "Tell me."

He exhales. "I caught him cuddling Hana and brought him outside. We talked for a while."

"You were gone for one entire day—"

"He got stabbed. Three times."

The candlelight does nothing to soften the silence that crashes into the room. Baya freezes.

"What?"

She sits up fast, dragging the sheet around herself in a clumsy way. She stumbles down the stairs in bare feet, the sheet dragging behind her. Her hair's wild, her skin flushed, her eyes burning.

Everyone looks up at once.

It's instantly obvious what she and Chishiya had been doing. Her shirtless torso. Her tangled hair. The sheet that is very clearly a bedsheet. The fact that Chishiya appears behind her a second later, still adjusting his shirt, his expression grim.

Sakiko blinks. Kaoru's jaw drops. Hana covers her mouth. Arisu opens his mouth and then immediately closes it again, wisely saying nothing.

Baya doesn't care. Her eyes lock on Kaede, who's lying on the couch with a blanket over him and a grimace on his face.

She rushes forward.

"Let me see," she says, already reaching for the blanket.

Kaede panics, pulling it tight around him. "Don't worry, I'm okay—

"Don't argue."

He groans, defeated, and sits up to slowly lifts the edge of the blanket and the hem of his shirt, showing the bandages on his back.

"Oh my God," she whispers. "Kaede—"

He winces. "I'm okay. Really."

"You are not okay." She glares over her shoulder at Chishiya. "You are not okay."

Chishiya, to his credit, says nothing.

Sakiko clears her throat loudly. "Sooo... not to derail the medical emergency, but, uh..." She gestures vaguely toward Baya's current state.

"Shut up, Sakiko," Kaoru mutters.

"Seriously," Arisu mumbles. "Why are none of you ever dressed?"

Baya ignores him and whispers to Kaede, "I'll get you some water and something sweet. You probably haven't eaten."

"I'm fine—"

"Humor me."

She rises, and finally turns to Chishiya. Her voice is deadly calm. "You're sleeping on the floor tonight."

He nods.

Baya disappears into the kitchen.

Kaede looks at Chishiya. "So... I'm guessing the conversation went well?"

Chishiya sighs, still tugging at the sleeve of his shirt. "It was going well."

Shirabi looks way too excited. "I love this. Do all parents do this? My dad is dead—thanks, Arisu and Aguni—, so I wouldn't know. Is—"

"You don't want to relate to this," Kaoru mutters. "It's very disturbing."

"My apologies for wanting to be... what's the opposite of fatherless?"

Arisu buries his face in his hands. "Indeed. It's very disturbing."

Shirabi frowns. "Don't you have a wife?"

"I walked in on Chishiya twice. Two times, it was a shower. Okay, horrible, but fine. Third time, it was a live action of what Kaoru was watching when he was thirteen."

Kaoru's face twists into something to horrified that he's probably the first person to ever wear such expression. "Why does everyone always bring that up..."

"Wait, enlighten me. What did he do?" Shirabi sits up straight. "I thought Kaoru was a good kid."

"Did Arisu not give enough details for you to realize?"

"Everyone was watching that at thirteen. Enlighten me on why your version is so special and how the hell everyone knows about it."

"Shirabi," Kaede whispers, "not everyone was watching that at thirteen. We talked about this."

Shirabi looks around. "Raise your hand if you were watching that at thirteen." He eyes Aguni. "You probably didn't have that when you were thirteen, though. Wait, was there, like, an alternative?" He looks at Arisu. "You definitely watched." He eyes Chishiya next. "You... nah, don't think so—"

Kiyoshi pats Chishiya on his shoulder (which earns him a scowl). "Nice meeting the King of Spades' son, huh?"

"The King of Spades was so much more preferable," Chishiya mutters in response. Then glares at Arisu. "How do you feel recalling my son's worst mistake in front of everyone?"

"You try to kill my son all the time."

Chishiya doesn't look impressed. "So?"

"So... isn't it fair enough?"

"No."

He scoffs. "Okay, then."

Nao looks from Chishiya to Arisu, to Kaede. "Wait, who stabbed Kaede? Was it—"

"Are you accusing me of stabbing him?"

"Eh, no. No, no," Nao says quickly. "Just wondering."

"He wouldn't have lived were it me."

Baya returns from the kitchen. "I'm just so glad you saved him. I knew you had a soft spot."

Kaede suddenly has a coughing fit.

Arisu stiffens. He stands up to face Chishiya. "What did you do? Was it really you?"

"Obviously not."

"Did you actually save him or did he wrap those bandages around his own body and you made it seem like you're the hero—"

"The bandages were placed precisely. Something someone like Kaede would not be capable of—"

"Kaede." Baya strokes his hair. "If Shuntarō hurt you or anything, tell me. I'll handle it!"

Kaede looks at Chishiya. Back at Baya. At Chishiya. Finally, he sighs. "He helped me. That's all. We were bickering before, but then he helped me." He nods, as if convincing himself, and stands up. The entire room—except for three people—starts yelling for him to sit back down, but he's determined, and stumbles towards the stairs.

"I'm going to check up on Hana," Kaede says.

Each floorboard Kaede steps on groans under his weight, and every breath feels heavier than the last. His back stings. His legs ache. But something else gnaws at him now. The bathroom door is cracked open.

He hears a wet, retching sound. A soft gasp. Kaede rushes forward and pushes the door open.

Hana is hunched over the toilet, her whole body trembling, her hand gripping the seat. Her hair spills messily down, clinging to her cheeks and sticking to her damp neck. Her breaths are uneven. She retches again. The sound of it makes his own stomach turn.

"Hana," Kaede says softly.

She jolts and tries to wave him away without looking up. "Don't... I'm fine—"

He kneels beside her instantly, ignoring the protest from his own back. With one hand, he reaches for the back of her head, sweeping her hair into a makeshift ponytail. The other steadies her shoulder.

She gags again. Although nothing's left, her body keeps trying.

"I've got you," he whispers, pressing his hand to her back. "Breathe, Hana."

Her body sags between retches, and she gasps, nearly choking. Kaede's hand flies to the side of her neck.

"No, hey— breathe through your nose. Okay? Just through your nose, in and out."

Kaede grabs a washcloth from the sink, dips it in their jerrycan full of cold water, wrings it out, and presses it gently to her forehead. Hana leans into the touch.

"I'm so gross," she murmurs.

"You're not. You're sick. That's not the same thing."

She sniffles, her whole face flushed red and puffy. "You just got stabbed three times. I should be taking care of you."

"And you are. You're letting me be here with you. That counts."

Another gag hits her. She crumples forward again. He's right there, holding her upright, pressing the cool cloth to the back of her neck, murmuring things she can barely hear but clings to anyway.

"I can't stop," she gasps.

"I know. I know. You're gonna get through it. Just let it out, everything. I've got you."

Her hands are gripping his thigh now. Nails digging in. Time passes slowly. She vomits again. Then again, but the intervals grow longer. Her body slowly starts to calm.

"Kaede..." she murmurs. "I'm sorry."

"Hm?"

"I lied." Hana throws up once again. "I... I joined a game last night," she admits. "I wanted to help. I thought if I cleared games every night, all of you would go home faster, especially if I cleared the most horrible ones. And I wanted to feel better about myself, so that's also why I did it. And... it was another way of asking for forgiveness after I left," she cries. "I joined the cannibalism game. The one my mom played. I was handling it pretty well once I came back home but then you disappeared and now I... I just can't stop thinking about what I ate."

His grip on her hair tightens slightly, then he lets go of it and runs his finger through the dark strands. "That's..." he has to hide his shock. "That's very brave," he says finally.

She shakes her head. "It was stupid."

Kaede doesn't say anything in response. He just continues stroking her hair for a while, then cleans her mouth with the washcloth. "Come on. Let's get you to bed."

"You should be careful. Your back is badly wounded." Worriedly, she grabs his wrist to keep him from moving. "Where will you be sleeping tonight?"

"The others say I shouldn't sleep in a cramped bed like Miyu's. I'll probably have to take my parents' bed. It's pretty big." He bites his lip. "Big enough for two, if you..."

"Yes."