𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍 || 𝘐 𝘚𝘌𝘌 𝘏𝘐𝘔 𝘌𝘝𝘌𝘙𝘠 𝘕𝘐𝘎𝘏𝘛
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[ ʜᴏʟᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ʟɪɴᴇ, ᴀʏᴇ
ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ꜰɪɢʜᴛ ꜰᴏʀ ᴘʀɪᴅᴇ ᴏʀ ɢʟᴏʀʏ?
ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴏʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴄᴀʀꜱ ᴄʟᴏꜱᴇ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ? ]

    SOON ENOUGH, THEY arrived back at the farm and Roland had his eyes glued to the back of the truck in front of them. Neither he nor Glenn had spoken a single word since his little crack of emotions that seeped out. The main reason for how demanding he was, was because of the fact that he could see Glenn and Maggie being something. He could see the true emotions in their eyes whenever they were close.

He didn't want them to go through what he went and was still going through with Amy. Losing someone- that you knew you could save- hurt the most. So, Roland believed that if you have that chance at love, you shouldn't just waste it. Take it and hold it close up until the bitter end that would inevitably come for them all. That was a reason why he wanted Glenn to just do it if he loved her. Love was a special thing and you can only find the right one only once. Roland saw this as an important thing to keep people's humanity and that was one of the most important things in this world.

As they pulled into the farm, Roland's eyes found a few members of the group loading up weapons and things into the back of the green SUV. Their eyes found the two vehicles and walked after them when they drove past. A few people from inside the house came outside at the sound and saw the two vehicles come to a park. Roland glancing at Glenn before grabbing the rifle from the back seat and hopping out of the vehicle.

Watching as Carl hugged their dad and Maggie walk directly past Hershel and hug Glenn who hugged her back. And when he saw his mom's eyes glued to him, he looked away and lowered his head as he walked over to Dale. "Here." He sniffled, holding the gun out for the older man who took it and brought the boy into a side hug. It was very brief, but it still felt nice for Roland to be welcomed back. And when he thought that was the only greeting he would get, he was wrong because Carl ran over and hugged him.

"Hey, bud." Roland smiled, reaching down and hugging his little brother back. One hand on the back of Carl's head and the other on his back. "I wasn't worried about you being gone. I knew you would make it back." Carl said happily once they pulled away. A chuckle escaped Roland's lips as he licked him from the lack of water. "Well, that's good to know." He ruffled up Carl's hair, earning a tiny glare but seeing the smile still there.

"Patricia, prepare the shed for surgery," Hershel announced as he walked inside. "Are you hurt?" Lori asked Rick who pulled away from the hug. "No, but what happened to you?" He questioned, cupping her face to inspect the few cuts on his face. "I was in a car accident." She stated quietly as Rick frowned. "Accident? How?" He questioned further as she sighed looking up at him. "I went looking for you." She told him as Roland placed his hand on Carl's shoulder and pulled him into his side. "Snuck out on her own. Brought her back." Shane pointed out briefly as Rick's eyebrows knitted further together. "Are you crazy? You could've-"

Before Rick could finish, T-Dog was the first to notice the boy in the truck that was deathly pale. "Who the hell is that?" He pointed as the group looked to see what he meant. "That's Randall," Glenn spoke up as Roland crossed his arms over his chest. "Screams like a little girl as well." He quipped, hearing his little brother snicker at the comment. Some of the group had gone over to look at Randall who was blindfolded and slight in and out of consciousness from blood loss. His pale skin close to snow.

But Roland didn't exactly care since he gave his little brother a pat on the head before walking in the direction of the house. Entering and walking into the room Beth had been moved into. Taking careful and cautious steps inside around the bed and to the chair beside her. She was still in shock, not responding or looking away from the ceiling she had been staring at for probably hours.

Taking a seat in the chair, Roland wiped his forehead with the back of his hand before leaning into the seat. His hand grasping her's as his thumb rubbed over her knuckles gently as he sighed. If he had to sit here forever until the blonde woke up, he would. There was no one in this world who could help him through this pain besides, Beth. He depended on her even if he didn't like to admit it or see it.

"We couldn't just leave him behind," Rick told the group as they all had gathered around the table in the dining room. Roland had found his spot by the window with his arms crossed. He'd been pulled away from Beth's side and brought to the Dining room for a meeting over the situation they had now found themselves in with Randall being at the farm. "He would've bled out, if he lived that long." He told the group.

If Roland had it his way, he would've just liked to hunt down Randall's group and deal with them like that. It would be an easy mission, in and out, simple. They had the sources and could gather more information from Randall if need be. But of course, everyone would shoot down this idea since it ended up being Hershel's and Rick's decision.

"It's gotten bad in town," Glenn told the group as Roland nodded. "There's probably a dozen walkers roaming those streets. Got nowhere nearby to salvage for supplies now." He added and Glenn nodded. "What do we do with him?" Andrea asked, clearly not liking the idea of having a stranger on the farm like the rest of the group. "Calm your horses. We'll decide." Roland told her with a wave of his hand as Hershel entered.

"I repaired his calf muscle as best I can, but he'll probably have nerve damage." He told the group as he dried his hand with a green cloth. "Won't be on his feet for at least a week." The group nodded, other than Andrea and Shane who stood by each other. "When he is, we give him a canteen, take him out to the main road, send him on his way." Just as Rick finished, Daryl entered and gave Carol a nod who responded with a smile.

"What'd I miss?" Daryl muttered as he leaned against the wall beside Roland. "Shane and Andrea pushing back like always." He stated, earning a huff from Daryl who nodded in response.

"Isn't that the same as leaving him for the walkers?" Andrea questioned. "He'll have a fighting chance." Rick shrugged as Shane looked up at his old friend. "Just gonna let him go? He knows where we are." He stated as Rick turned to him. "He was blindfolded the whole way here. He's not a threat." Rick assured as Shane chuckled. "Not a threat." He shook his head. "How many of them were there? You killed three of their men, took one of them hostage, but they ain't just gonna come looking for 'em?" He questioned.

"They left him for dead. No one is looking." Rick snapped back as T-Dog leaned on the table. "We should still post a guard." He pointed out and Roland nodded in agreement. "He's out cold right now, will be for hours," Hershel added as Shane shook his head. "You know what? I'm gonna go get him some flowers and candy" He scoffed as he pushed himself off the wall and began walking for the door. "Look at this, folks- We back in Fantasyland." He said sarcastically as Roland felt his jaw clench in anger.

It's been a day since Dale had truly revealed everything about Shane. How he was dangerous, erratic, was going to get the group killed. And now Roland was able to see that Shane didn't like the whole fact of trying to keep a bit of a human inside each other. It was like he was going insane and Roland could see it clear as day now. He was no better since he was keeping the secret of what happened at the school to himself, but at least he was trying to better himself. Trying to keep the group alive and safe while Shane was trying to win Lori's heart.

"You know, we haven't even dealt with what you did at my barn yet." Hershel reminded as Shane stopped and turned to look at the older man. "Let me make this perfectly clear, once and for all- This is my farm." He ordered, pointing at the ground. "Now I wanted you gone. Rick talked me out of it, but doesn't mean I have to like it. So do us both a favour- Keep your mouth shut." Hershel finished.

There was a moment of silence where Shane tilted his head, biting back the words wanting to escape. Everyone knew that Hershel should have respect if they wanted to stay on the farm. They all knew that, except Shane. He seemed to be the only one trying to bite the hand that feeds him. If they had even left the farm and went on their way to Fort Benning, they would most likely be dead or still on the road searching for a safe haven.

This was somewhere they could build and prosper, but everyone needed to understand who was in charge, including Shane. And it was obvious that he didn't like not being in charge because he would've probably killed Hershel by now.

After a few moments, Shane begrudgingly turned with a sigh and exited the house. Roland pushing himself off the wall and in hot pursuit of confronting the man. He was annoyed by the behaviour and needed to get his words through Shane's thick skull. And if Roland had to try and beat it into Shane's head, he would.

Pushing the door open, Roland moved down the steps. "What the hell is wrong with you, man? You tryin' to start chaos?" Roland questioned sharply as Shane chuckled, stopping and turning to the boy. "No, the person doing that is your father. Don't know a damn thing about keeping us alive." He growled and Roland took a step towards the man. "I don't think you've noticed, but if you were in charge you would've let Hershel be killed in town or have the group Randall's with, bring them here and kill us all. And worst of all, you would've let Beth get worse and die." Roland snapped, pushing Shane back.

"Don't push me, boy," Shane warned and Roland smirked, tilting his head as he stared at the man mockingly. "What will you do, Shane Walsh? Kill me like I killed Otis? Hm?" He questioned as Shane's jaw ticked in frustration at his words. "You'll get us all killed with how you're goin'. You and Andrea should lock it down before I lock it down for you." Roland stated lowly as Shane smirked in amusement, thinking the threat was just empty. Bark no bite type of thing.

But Roland was being complete and utterly serious with this. If there was one thing he was willing to do, it was to knock some heads together and get people to see what was at stake here. They were on this beautiful farm that they could call their home now, but Andrea and Shane couldn't handle that. Avoiding it like it's some plague to them.

Roland went to turn and walk away, but he stopped when he chuckled coldly. Turning back to Shane, he got dangerously close and pointed at the man's face. Eyes dripping with venom just as his words slipped past his lips.

"And accept that my mother doesn't want you anymore and it'll stay that way with me and my dad around." He growled sharply but was cut off by Shane grabbing the collar of his shirt and moving him back. Pinning him against a tree with his breath quick and ragged.

"Watch what you say to me, Roland." He warned and Roland wasn't even fazed. He wasn't scared or worried about the situation he was in. Actually, he was thrilled because now he was seeing Shane's true colours. He now knew that this was because of the fact that Shane was in love with his mother and was obsessed.

"See? Struck a nerve." Roland mocked before slapping Shane's hands off of him. Glaring at the man who was breathing like an animal full of rage. "Grow the fuck up and learn that this isn't about you or my mom or my dad. It's about everyone else." He finished before bumping with Shane's shoulder as he walked past him. Passing by Andrea, and making sure to send her a glare before he entered the house again.

Needing time away from everyone else and finding himself having a shower where he could feel calm, peace, and sincerity from everything else going on in the world.

Time passed and Roland was sitting by the fence near the barn staring up at the moon. The slight whispers of the wind coming as music to his ears with the crackling sound of wood from the little campfire the group had set up at the camp. He didn't know why he was out here when he was exhausted and needed sleep, but here he was. Just standing here and staring up at the moon that was is so beautiful at this point in time.

And it seemed to be ruined by the moment he could hear the sound of footsteps approaching. Turning his head, he saw it was his dad. But even in the moonlight, he could see the anger, frustration, rage shining within his eyes. It was something Roland got pretty good at spotting out even if his dad held a carefree expression or a neutral posture. Someone's eyes could tell a thousand emotions, and stories.

"Comin' to say hi, or are we going to speak about what's on your mind?" Roland questioned as he looked back up at the moon. Rick coming to stand by his son and stare at him. Just from his father's eyes, Roland could feel his right side of his face burning. Like his dad's eyes could burn his skin right off and turn him into nothing but mush.

Linking his thumbs with the belt loop's on his jeans, Rick pursed his lips. "Did you kill, Otis?" The question had Roland immediately lower his head in shame. His hands grasping the wooden fence and lean forward. "Yes." He answered quietly with his eyes shut. "I had no choice, but I did it for Carl. Shane put me in the situation and I had no other choice than to do what had to be done." Roland explained.

Before he could even comprehend, his throat was grasped tightly. His head turned roughly to stare at his father who had his teeth baring. Growling before letting go and backing away a couple of steps. Roland stood there frozen, his neck still in the same position before lowering and looking at his father.

"You are supposed to be better. I trusted you going out there with Shane, and then I find out about this? This?!" He questioned sharply in a low tone as Roland kept his mouth clamped shut. Growing up, Roland had always had a problem with keeping his mouth shut in arguments. And he'd learned it was sometimes better to be quiet than to speak at all.

But sometimes, he couldn't help it and this was one of those times. "What do you want from me? I did it to keep your youngest son alive- my brother-! So don't put all the blame on me." He snapped sharply and Rick pointed at the boy, pressing his chest. "What I want is for you to be better and not go insane as Shane has. Become a liability for the safety of the group. They matter- not us, they do." Rick explained, pointing back at the campsite.

Rick sighed as he motioned with his hands. "I'm grateful for what you did. Really. I am, but you left Patricia without a husband. You took someone away from them when he was doing nothing else, but tryin' to help us!" He explained before placing his hands on his own chest. "And I would've done anything to make sure your brother stayed alive. But I never wanted you to be the person to carry the weight you have to carry now. No one, especially you, should carry that pain and trauma."

Roland took deep breathes as he stared at his father speechless. His words cut deep. Deeper than any knife could and any bullet could travel. They held emotion and care. The care that showed Roland his father truly didn't want him to hold this burden for the rest of the life. That it wasn't like a loss from a race or a loss from a football game. It was taking someone's life.

"This weight can hold you down like a mountain, and I don't want to see you lose your mind over it," Rick explained to his son before placing a hand on his shoulder. Staring deep into those light brown eyes that he's known all his life from raising the teenager. They were swimming in emotion and regret that Rick knew wouldn't be expressed. Instead, they would be held in until they reached the brim where they would either slowly seep out or explode. Taking down anyone in his way.

There was a solid 10 seconds of silence. Only the wind filling the space between them before Rick pulled Roland into a hug. Feeling his son's arms wrap around him tightly where they held a tight embrace. It was a way for Rick to say he forgave his son for what he did and thanked him for it. They never were the type to speak their emotions to one another because that's how their connection had always been. If anything, it was Roland going to Carl about his feelings and venting them out. He didn't care if Carl didn't understand the situation, it was better for him to shed those emotions to someone that he cared deeply about.

A tear slowly slid down Roland's cold cheek as he inhaled shakily. "I see his face every night. I can't run from him. He's just always there!" He cried, his chest tightening as a sob escaped his dry lips. Rick held his son tighter even when Roland's legs buckled and they both fell to their knees. Sobs leaving Roland as his head rested against his Dad's shoulder. "I know, I know, son," Rick muttered quietly, rubbing Roland's back to try and soothe him as best as he could.

But this would only be the first of many situations like this. This would be the one embrace they got before things began turning for the worse.