mention of suicide attempt.

the boy tossed and turned as he layed in his bed, uncovered as he hadn't found the energy to cover himself even a bit despite the chilling temperature throughout the dorm.

didn't know our heating system going off after working hours applied for home, too.

he was physically incapable of feeling the cold, as the mix of emotions flowing through his veins were enough to have Ni-Ki feeling as if he was on fire.

why was he so mad, he wondered. he wish he had an answer for the irritatingly chiming question, but he didn't.

he had no reason to feel so upset, either. she was a free lady, who was allowed to do whatever she wished— because in her words, "these men don't control me."

he just wished it'd been him.

his ears perked up as he heard the front door open, NaRi's usual cheery greeting sounding through the room's walls. normally he'd be jumping out of bed, running to take her bag and jacket and hug her as a welcome—

but there he stayed, angrily sulking in his bed.

he faced the wall, not turning around even when the girl had thrown the bedroom door open, searching for the disappeared maknae.

her eyes widened upon seeing the boy's back, thinking he was asleep, explaining why he hadn't run out to greet her like usual.

she'd placed her things in HeeSeung's room, so she wasted no time in running towards the boy's bed, snuggling beside him.

she wrapped her arm around his torso, perking her head up to look at his... opened eyes?

"oh, you're awake?" she asked, furrowing her eyebrows as she slightly pouted.

he only nodded, staying still as the girl leaned her face on his own.

"what's wrong?" she asked after a while of tense silence, Ni-Ki fighting the urge to roll his eyes.

"nothing." he replied in Korean, something rare for them to do behind the cameras.

her forehead creased, lifting her face from its previous position. she sat up, using her strength to turn the boy to face her.

his face remained emotionless, eyes closing as he didn't want to look at the girl, knowing he'd easily break.

"obviously there's something wrong and it's obviously to do with me, and you know i don't like finding things out through other people," she began, manually opening his eyes. "so it's best you're straight up with me."

he blankly stared at the girl's face, endless compliments and thoughts about the girl running through his mind in an instant.

"hm?" she urged him to say what was wrong.

"it's nothing. don't worry about it."

she bitterly chuckled, "alright then." the girl said, forcing his arms open, placing herself in them.

he made himself stay still.

she grew frustrated as his hands hadn't instantly found home in her hair as they usually did, sighing into his clothed chest.

thousands of thoughts continued flowing through his mind, the boy not able to stop himself before he spoke.

"it should've been me. why him?"

his eyes widened a millisecond after the question escaped his lips, the girl allowing the words to register in her mind before leaning her head up. her eyes scanned his shocked face, noticing his regretful, yet closed, eyes.

"what?"

he chuckled, sitting up, forcing her out of his warmth. "nothing."

she sat directly in front of him, leaving no possible escape route. "what'd you say?"

once again, the words escaped before he could stop himself, the anger speaking on behalf of him. "you heard me."

she looked surprised at his words, "what are you talking-"

"don't act so innocent, NaRi."

at this point, his mind had seperated from the rest of his body.

"what are you-" she began again.

"it doesn't matter. go out there with your little boyfriend."

her eyes creased in confusion for the nth time, "my boyfriend?"

the boy rolled his eyes, annoyed, "you don't have to hide anything from me anymore, we all know, just go be happy," he spat, the girl's confusion only growing.

"what are you-"

"you were just dying to get it out so you told Sunoo to tell us, didn't you?" he bitterly chuckled, eyes boring holes into the girls'.

"if you're talking about JungWon-"

"yeah, i am talking about Yang JungWon. who else?"

"i'm not dating-"

"oh!" he interrupted her for the millionth time, "i forgot about Haruto! or was it Yoshinori? or.. maybe TaeHyun.. or.. i dunno.. YeonJun? hm?" he spat out, a faux laugh laced through his words.

NaRi was about to speak when she stopped, the tone in which the boy had spoken slapping her in the face.

the tweet from months prior repeated itself in her head, the girl laughing after a few seconds.

it wasn't an amused laugh, though. the boy's ears had never absorbed such a sour sound.

"wow, i never thought you'd call me a whore, yet here we fuckin' are." she spat out, face having done a complete 180 switch from a few seconds prior.

the words registered in his mind, eyes widening upon realizing he.. had.

"Mitsu-" he began, though it was now her to cut his words short.

"no. there's no bipolarness allowed here, you're not doing what HeeSeung hyung did the day i tried killing myself," she spat out, finally standing from the bed.

the remaining six members had been standing outside the door, listening in on what and why their maknaes had begun arguing.

hearing this broke the only other Japanese-speaking member. Jay's eyes hardened, his hand flying to the doorknob, turning it open before anyone could stop him.

he walked in, seeing Ni-Ki standing in front of the girl, holding his hands out.

"i'm so-"

"what did i just say?" she spat out, voice deeper than normal. "no switching up now. you let what you needed out out, thanks for letting me know what you really think of me." she said, rolling her eyes before turning to walk out.

he grabbed her wrist, attempting to get the girl to turn around again.

"let. me. go." she harshly spoke, forcing her arm out of his grasp, Jay stepping in front of the boy as he'd tried following after her, placing his hand on the boy's chest.

she walked towards the living room, attempting to open her phone despite her rapidly shaking hands.

"why the fuck would you ever think speaking to Mireia that way is okay?" the older spat out at the maknae, Ni-Ki feeling himself shrink from embarrassment.

"i wasn't thinking," he mumbled, Jay humourlessly chuckling.

"that girl loves the absolute HELL out of you, Riki. you disrespected her and spoke in a way no one should ever speak to a fucking woman." Jay said as his finger jabbed into the boy's chest, his voice morphing to venom for the younger.

Ni-Ki looked down, ashamed. "i was jealous." he whispered, a stray tear escaping his eye.

the boys watched as the youngest began to cry, regretful of his words and actions towards the girl he, and they, loved oh so dearly.

JungWon couldn't help but feel guilty, convincing himself to be the root of NaKi's first big fight.

he walked out of the room, sensing the boy's hidden anger towards him. he heard muffled sniffles coming from HeeSeung's room, turning his head to see the door cracked open.

he quietly inched closer towards the door, peeking inside to see the girl's shaking figure curled into a ball on the bed. though the room was darkened by the curtains, he was able to make out her face, which was stuffed into a pillow.

he frowned, walking inside.

the girl's head jolted up, eyes widening upon seeing the leader walking towards her. "hyu-"
"shh, Nanie, you don't have to say anything," he calmly spoke, encouraging her to lay her head back down by caressing her hair with his fingertips.

"i'm sorry for the trouble i've caused.. just cause of a stupid little urge," he spoke, sincerity laced through his apology.
she softly smiled, still sniffling, "don't apologize, hyung.. it shouldn't have been this big of a deal,"

his eyes continued trailing over her face, slowly leaning down to place a lingering kiss on the crown of her head, "he'll come around,"

it's time to wake up.

a sharp inhale knocked the girl out of her sleep, hands rushing to her cheeks as she thought one of the boys had poured water on her— only to realize there were actually tears streaming down her face.

a low groan from beside her caused her eyes to widen, the girl quickly turning her head, only to see the boy she'd dreamt about sleeping beside her.

she became aware of the arm tightly wrapped around her waist, and their tangled legs.

NaRi let out a small breath of relief, attempting to remove all signs of her distress before the boy could notice.

unfortunately, because of her face laying on the boy's chest, some tears had fallen on it.

Ni-Ki's eyes slowly opened, ears perking up at the sound of her sniffles— the type she always tried hiding from him.

he leaned his head down, resting his lips on the crown of her head for a while. the girl froze upon feeling this.

"good morning, Mitsu," he said, voice deep as it usually was in the morning.

"good morning," she replied, closing her mouth after realizing how raspy her voice sounded— another obvious sign she'd been crying.

he lifted his head, turning her face to his own. his eyes scanned her, noticing her flushed cheeks and reddened nose tip. "so you were crying?"

she tore her eyes from his own, trying to avoid having to explain her dream to the boy.

Ni-Ki sighed, forcing his body to slide downward, stopping when his face met hers. he inched closer, halting his slight movements when their noses touched, leaving her no choice but to look him in the eye.

she noticeably gulped out of nervousness, the boy chuckling at her action. "what's up?" he asked, not breaking eye contact.

the girl knew he'd get it out of her one way or another, "i had a bad dream,"

"what about?"

she held her breath as she thought of how to phrase her words, "we fought," NaRi finally spoke, voice somewhat shaky.

Ni-Ki knew she did that when she was nervous or when she was close to crying, so he decided to not press any further.

the boy simply wrapped his arms tighter around the girl's torso, softly rubbing their noses together. "i deeply apologize for anything i did to make you upset, or that made you dream of us fighting," he began, whispering the words, though she was able to hear the sincerity of them. "please don't think what you dreamt of is what i think of you, Mitsu,"

she hesitantly nodded, the action causing their noses to rub against eachother again. the pair laughed at the feeling, humour seizing after a few seconds. she flicked her eyes down, returning her gaze back to his eyes soon after.

he waited a second, thinking of what to do next.

a familiar urge formed itself in NaRi's stomach as she remained staring at the boy, eyes repeating their previous motion in a shy way.

the boy noticed her shifting gaze, hesitantly leaning closer towards the girl.

Ni-Ki leaned in, closing the space between them by pressing his lips to the corner of her own.

NaRi physically relaxed at the motion, feeling herself chasing after the boy when he moved away.

he opened his eyes, faces still close to the other's. "not yet," he whispered, showing a small grin.

🦇 ... 끝!