sensitive topics !
name calling, mentions of blood, etc.

i-land just ended. it's been around a week or so since the final debut lineup was announced to the world. fans were estatic, their seniors were estatic, the group of 8 was estatic.

today was the day for the group to fly back from JeJu, something NaRi had been looking forward to. she was excited beyond words to return home, although some concerns kept popping up in her mind.

more specifically, the airport.

NaRi had always been scared of being trapped in tight spaces. barely anyone knew this, since she thought it'd make her seem vulnerable in some way— and that was the last thing she wanted.

this day, she wore the biggest black hoodie she could find. maybe i can blend in better with this on.. yeah, maybe.

as the car approached the airport, she caught a quick glance of the crowd. so. many. people. i thought like fifteen people would be here at the most... she carefully stepped out of the car, immediately finding HeeSeung's hand from in front of her. "please don't leave me.." she weakly said, not loud enough for him to hear.

the group of 8 quickly walked into the building, all hoping and praying they wouldn't get mobbed by the humongous group of fans.

..they were wrong.

NaRi kept her head hung low, eyes glued to the ground. maybe if i don't look at them they won't do anything to me. they wouldn't do anything to me anyways, right? they support all of us...

...right?

she gripped onto HeeSeung's hand even tighter when she felt the security guards pushing up against her even more. some fans had somehow gotten closer to where she was standing— there was specifically one trying to reach her.

and that's what she did. the fan was somehow able to push through the security guards' shielding, her hand now an inch away from NaRi's.

the older girl reached out further for NaRi's arm, immediately clawing her arm with her long acrylics. she felt NaRi jump at the harsh contact, making the older smile under her mask.

"fucking bitch," she spoke in Mandarin, knowing that was the one language the boys didn't know, "stay away from my HeeSeung oppa." she spat out at the younger girl, clenching her fingers harder into the girls skin though the hoodie, somehow drawing blood. "how'd you even make it to the group? you know nothing. you're worth nothing. you shouldn't be with them." she managed to get out before the groups manager shoved her out of the way, back into the crowd.

NaRi heard and understood every. single. word.

her mind began racing, her attention somehow leaving her current situation, drifting away to what the older girl told her. do i really not have a place here? she ended up letting go of HeeSeung's hand in the process, now feeling alone.

she kept her eyes on the floor, hand now flying behind her in order to somehow latch onto someone's hand in the process. Jay took notice of the girls action, immediately moving forward to try to lightly jerk her back to his body. he succeeded, but this made NaRi all the more terrified.

she let out a small whimper, head immediately flinching back. "please don't hurt me.." she said in the weakest voice possible. "NaRi.. it's me. you're okay." Jay responded back to her, now taking her in his embrace. he had no idea what had happened to her, all he knew was that he had to be there for her.

they continued walking for what felt like an eternity, NaRi still tightly clinging onto Jay. the members were all distraught, some crying, all petrified from their first airport experience. we haven't even debuted yet...

they were able to leave the group of fans behind, now only being surrounded by their staff. NaRi, still shaking, unable to breathe, was still in Jay's embrace.

they approached their vehicle, NaRi feeling drastically better as she knew this was only a step closer to being back in the comfort of their dorm.

Jay dragged her along with him to his car, not daring to leave her alone when she'd just gone through hell. as soon as they got comfortable, Jay placed NaRi's head on his shoulder, attempting to let her find comfort with him.

the entire time she hadn't bursted out into tears, only a single tear was able to escape from the girls eye. she closed her eyes, latching her hand on Jay's, seeking more comfort. just go to sleep. you won't remember anything afterwards.

and so she did. NaRi somehow ended up falling asleep in the car despite the war going on in her mind. as Jay felt more weight being put on his body, he felt relieved that NaRi felt better. let's just hope it stays this way..

the group finally arrived at the dorm, all the boys feeling more relieved than ever. Jay, still having a sleeping NaRi in his embrace, asked SungHoon to carry his bags inside. it's not like she's gonna wake up soon anyways..

he carried her out of the van, bridal style. he made his way to their bedroom, carefully placing her on his bed. should i? yeah.. right? it makes her feel better. yeah. after a long, tough mental battle, Jay carefully slipped into the bed beside her. he lifted her so she laid on top of him, face resting in the crook of his neck. he managed to place a thin blanket on top of the both of them, making sure his arms wrapped around her securely, and finally fell asleep.

not even an hour later, NaRi's eyes abruptly opened. the words she was told earlier never left her mind, only making her emotions go haywire. she carefully checked who she was laying on, and after seeing Jay's chain she figured it out. can't believe i can't say this isn't the first time this has happened

she tried going back to sleep, telling her mind to shut up and forget the awful things that were said to her.

that didn't happen.

the words from the fan kept running through her head, as if that was what her brain was created to do.

the voice slowly got louder, making NaRi suddenly feel choked up. no.. stop.. they never stopped. the same phrases popping up in her head. now mixed with things anti's had said about her on twitter. man, i really wish i never saw all of that. don't they know i still have my secret stan account?

she slipped into a trance, ultimately failing to notice her now rapid breathing had woken Jay up. he layed there, unsure of what to do. he heard a quiet voice— undoubtedly from the girl laying on him.

"you're worthless.... you're not good enough for this... you don't have a place here.... they just felt bad for you and put you in the group..." she choked up in between sobs. her eyes staring off into space, not blinking.

"NaRi, baby.."

"they don't like you.. they never have.. another hyung should've taken your place..."

"NaRi."

she didn't hear him. she couldn't. all she could hear was the same voice chanting in her mind, telling her countless negative remarks and hurtful lies. her shaking became uncontrollable, her sobs only becoming louder and her tears seeming endless.

Jay just layed there, trying to think of ways to get NaRi to come back down to consciousness. he suddenly remembered she liked when they caressed her head, playing with her hair. he grabbed the girl tighter, carefully moving his hand up to her head.

"shh.. shh..", he began, "no one's gonna hurt you. you're safe now. you're with us, you're meant to be with us, we love you." he told her, feeling her body gradually calm down.

she stopped talking, the only things coming from her vocally were her choked up coughs.

Jay continued caressing the girls hair, noticing how effective the simple action ended up being.

"Jay.." her voice came out, more fragile than ever.

"yeah?"

"i- uh.." she stopped, unsure of what to say, still feeling dangerously emotional.

"it's okay, NaRi. we're here. you know that. we'll always be here for you. even if i can never compare to what HeeSeung hyung is to you, i'll try my absolute best, okay? you'll always have me no matter what." he told the girl, glad she was finally feeling at least the tiniest bit better.

"i'm sorry. this was so stupid of me to-"

"no, Mireia." he said, tone harsher than ever. "don't finish that sentence."

"okay.." she trailed off, suddenly scared of him.

she carefully lifted herself off his body, careful to not hit her head on anything. she sat in the far corner, mind beginning to race once more.

Jay observed her, immediately knowing something was bothering her. "what's up?"

"i just.. that girl just.. she.." she trailed off, not sure how to approach the sensitive topic. she suddenly remembered her wound, lifting her arm. bad mistake. "oh sh- oh no.." she quietly laughed. she carefully placed her arm back down, lifting her sleeve as gentle as she could.

red.

that's all there was.

dried up blood mixed with blood showing through the wound mixed with bruises beginning to form.

NaRi's eyes widened at this, Jay's following suit. "we have to go to someone about this."

Jay carefully got out of the bed, standing NaRi up after him. he wrapped his arm around her waist, helping stabilize her since she was still weak. they walked out of the room, heading towards the living room.

the other 6 were all there, doing whatever they were doing. HeeSeung was the first to take notice to the pair, eyes immediately shooting at his best friend.

"baby im so sorry i let you go and you got hurt i promise i didn't mean to do that are you- WHAT HAPPENED?" he suddenly stopped his rambling, finally taking notice to her bright red arm.

by this point, the other five had moved their attentions to the young girl, all five pairs of eyes increasing in size.

she chuckled. "i dunno.. something must've happ-"

"a sasaeng attacked her." Jay told the older boy, not wanting NaRi to lie about something so serious.

"A WHAT?"
"DID THEY DO ANYTHING ELSE?"
"oh you've got to be kidd-"

"GUYS! i'm fine! really.. it doesn't even hurt that bad.." she trailed off, eyes begging Jay to not tell them what'd happened between them.

"okay well, we need to clean that up. it's bad." "okay, sure." she answered, still clinging onto Jay for support as she moved to their couch. dang this hurts a lot more than i'd anticipated, that bit-

"okay i'm back!" HeeSeung announced as he returned with a first aid kit, immediately going to NaRi to help begin the wound's healing process.

she watched the eldest work on her wound for a bit, suddenly feeling a pair of eyes on her. she slightly turned her head upwards, immediately making eye contact with the one who'd been there this entire time.

she sent a shy smile, knowing they'd have to have a talk later in the night.

eventually HeeSeung finished up, placing a gentle kiss on the bandages. "it should be gone soon. i'll have to change them in a bit, but this should all help." she sent a grateful smile, "thank you, hyungie." she told him, once again holding Jay for support and signaling for him to lead them to the room.

they walked in, going back to his bed. she played with her fingers, suddenly having a hard time finding the right words. "i... honestly never thought i'd put you through that again.." she laughed a bit, making a small chuckle come from the boy. "just, i guess... thank you for being here. i appreciate it more than you might realize.." she trailed off, still not being able to find the right words. "it's okay, that's what i'm here for. to make you feel safe. we are a part of a team, afterall. i'll always be here for you. you know that, right?" he said, now face-to-face with the girl.

"...yeah." she answered back, a smile on her face. they sat in silence for a moment, a debate going on in NaRi's head. do it. NO? don't do it! he might find it weird? you guys don't even know eachother that well ye- i don't care. you know, whatever. she unexpectedly leaned forward, lightly crashing into the boys chest once again. they both smiled in eachothers' embrace, happy to have found someone to confide in.

🦇 ... 끝!