𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

IT HAD BEEN two weeks after the whole incident and celeste had let her father know about what went down. he said he would get charges pressed and everything figured out. as much as celeste wanted everything to go back to normal everybody knows nothing will get back to normal.

she had been isolating herself in her room. she didn't go to school, she just did the assignments online and called it a day. she had ghosted everyone besides her cousin. it was nothing personal she just couldn't handle everything being throw her at her in the moment.

it was like her life was slowly going downhill. and it was worse that she couldn't even sleep it away since she was having trouble sleeping now. every time she would see herself in the mirror there would be multiple eye bags underneath her eyes. she didn't even look like herself.

on the topic of everything being messed up with her life, she didn't know where she stood with darrian. she didn't know what to do since they never talked talked he just told her that he didn't kiss so and so.

but that doesn't make anything better since he actually did.

the thing that she didn't know is that darrian was currently walking over to her house. he didn't know why and he was mildly regretting it because who knows if the girl wanted to see anyone but it worried him to the point that he hadn't seen her since weeks.

celeste jumped when she heard her front door opening. her dad always forgot to lock it and would always tell her to lock it but she never remembered or even got out of bed. she didn't know who would come to her house, and if isis was coming she would let her know.

darrian was the last person to cross her mind for some reason in this situation but while the two were still together he would always come over uninvited. which she didn't mind since there was a scheduled time he would usually come so it didn't give her that much of a scare.

"celeste?" the girl winded her eyes when she heard her ex-boyfriends voice. she could tell it was him even though he was all away downstairs. then she heard knocking on her door, "yo celeste you in here?"

celeste didn't know to either ignore him and say nothing but she just let out a big sigh before opening the door. from her point of view she thought she looked like a rat's nest. she was in a oversized tee with black shorts that couldn't even show.

"yo leste, have you been gettin any sleep bro?" darrian reached out his hand to caress her cheek and she just let him. she felt helpless so she just, let him. "i missed you." he mumbled.
celeste nodded as she lets him pull her into a hug.

she couldn't lie and say she didn't miss him either because she did. it felt right for him to be this close to her for some reason, she was getting deja vu again. but she didn't want the same ending, again.

she slowly pulls away from the hug when she heard the voices speaking in her head again. it was so overwhelming she felt like crying.

darrian furrows his eyebrows when he sees her stiffened figure and expressionless face. "ma are you okay?" he tried to hold her hand but she swats it away. yeah she was being dramatic but she didn't care.

celeste let out a sigh, "i don't know why you coming here actin like we friends darrian. we not." she mumbled as she walked to her bed. darrian scrunched his face up from the tone she had which he didn't appreciate much. "ain't you jus hug me though? and i thought we was good."

celeste sucks her teeth. she didn't forgive him, she really didn't care what he had said weeks ago. she only let it slide because she had a literal sleeping baby on her and there friends were a couple feet away so she wasn't gonna cause a scene.

but now they were along she wanted to tell him everything that he had made her feel.

"no actually we're not."

darrian then let out a frustrated sigh. "but you said—" she cut him off, "nigga i ain't say nothing. i wasn't gonna scream at you because i had a toddler sleeping on me and like other people i think before i act." she told him smartly.

darrian was confused now. he didn't get it, he thought she had forgive him and he was coming over to just check up on her but now it seemed like his plans were going side ways.

"then tell me what you wanna say celeste. what didn't you tell me cause you didn't wanna tell me the day i was communicating like you want me to but you did the opposite."

celeste scrunched her face up from the sentence that had just flowed out his mouth. he had formally worded that way worse then he meant. "see that's what. your not sorry ddot. you just say it because you think apologizing is apparently gonna get you anything."

she stopped her sentence before saying something she was gonna regret. "look i just think that you should do your own thing while i do mine cause we obviously not for each other no more."

ddot frowned at that because he thinks they are meant for each other. in every which way.

"why?"

celeste was honestly lying, she just didn't feel like darrian even wanted her anymore. and she wasn't gonna sit here being miserable because her love was unrequited. "ddot don't act dumb. both you and me know what you want. and it's not me."

darrian felt his heart drop from that once sentence. he didn't know that this was how he made her felt, if not he made her feel way worse. he shook his head, "no. no. i want you bro. don't say that dumbass shit."

celeste raised her eyes brows, "what happened to, nah gangsta ion even fuck wit you like that?" she repeated his own words as she did hand gestures to mock quotation marks. ddot sighed and out his hand in his hair, "you know i ain't mean that. i just wasn't thinking right."

celeste jumped up from her bed from that sentence, he was proving her point. "see! you don't think before you speak darrian. and i let it slid multiple times, over and over again. but you never stop though. i feel like i'm the only one trying sometimes. and you might feel differently and that's fine, i just don't wanna see you miserable with me when you could like a whole different person!"

darrian couldn't even find the words to speak since she just kept going on. "and you know i love you d, i do. you don't have to though. we are two completely different people with different feelings. and ion know maybe we just not the same like we used to be." she mumbled, already feeling her eyes watering a bit.

"nah stop, ma, stop." he raised his hand in a stop in gesture before speaking. "and you know i love you okay? you needa stop saying i don't cause i do. i love you so fucking much and you know that,"

"but d you don't show that. you didn't show that after i was discharged. you didn't show that when you kissed haven and you didn't show that when you broke up with me. and i still don't know why."

this was eating darrian alive. this was all because she didn't want to put her through pain but he just caused her more pain than before. he let out a sigh before starting, "leste i ain't break up with you cause i ain't love you or shit like that. it was because i did, and i still do, but you got shot cause of me my heart. it was my fault."

celeste instantly shook her head at this, "no. it wasn't. it wasn't though." she said as her voice got slowly wobbly at each word. "if it was anyone's fault it was mine. it was cause i was being stubborn and didn't let you walk with me if not none of this would of ever happened." she tells him what she had kept bottled up for so long, it felt good to tell the only person she trusted so much that. it was like she was set free.

"mm don't say that. i love you. and then i'm gonna love you tomorrow. then i'm gon love you forever. it was ma fault that i broke up wit you cause i wanna hurt but it only hurt you worse right?"

she nodded because he had wondered that better than she could have ever told him. "you know i miss you." his whispered as he now stood in front of her and pulled her closer to him. "me too." she mumbles.

he brung her head back up to eye level, wiping the tears that had unknowingly fallen down from her eyes. "can i show you how much i missed you?" he whispered again. celeste nodded in response.

darrian put his thumb over her lip un-verbally asking if he could kiss her and she nodded, completely understanding what he was asking. darrian immediately locked there lips together and it was like they had never stopped being together since he felt the same sensation that happened each time they kiss.

the kiss started out slowly and lovingly until darrian swiped his tongue into her mouth. celeste had her hand around the back of his neck and the amount of force he was putting into the kiss made her stumble over and hit the edge of her bed, but they never stopped kissing.

as the two continued kissing darrian switched positions so he was also on the bed but she was now on his lap. the kisses started getting slowly sloppier and he ripped apart to leave kisses on her neck making her close her eyes in pleasure.

darrian found her spot and continued on sucking on it making slowly heavy breaths leave the girl's lips. "you good mami." he told her more than asking her, whiles she nodded not even understating what he meant, just enjoying whatever he was doing to her.

celeste was sick of how long she was going without feeling darrian's lips on hers and pulled him back, kissing him hard. she felt him tracing the soft shapes he always did while holding her which made her even more comfortable than ever.

he was still the same boy she loved, and loves.

the girl felt his hands go under her shirt, which she didn't even feel uncomfortable with she just loved having him in her presence again. celeste pulled away for a quick second when she felt herself getting out of breath but darrian grabbed her neck, pulling her back into a slowly and sensual kiss.

she let him and slowly began moving down his face, from his jaw to his neck. she peppered soft kisses into there as she heard him let out the same breaths she was letting out a couple moments ago, she loved how similar the two could make each other feel.

celeste pushed him up the bed bed, pinning his head to the headboard of her bed as she slowly pressed her body against his even more,

darrian let out a sharp breath until speaking. "mami i love you." he tells her the complete truth. celeste pulls her head from his neck, smiling at the boy. "i love you more baby."

F SPEAKS 💫

NOTE— YEAH. YEAH 🤭🤭. YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. somebody needa tell me stop makin so much ddot books cause i got bout 4 of him in ma drafts🧍🏾‍♀️. ion know if this would pass as smut since i don't right smut for minors since i am a minor myself and that would be super weird chile .. anyways see ya later pookies 😘😘.