.

.

.

You

"... Who are...?"

???

"Please, we are not here to fight. We aren't accomplices of Kazuha, either."

Scaramouche

"...?"

???

"Aha! I saw... N/N's face... This is amazing, I feel so special..."

You

"Um..."

You had no idea what to do with a full-grown man stuck to your leg, so you simply stood there.

Kazuha

"I apologize, I should've told you sooner..."

You

"Hey, aren't you that oni I always locked up in cells?"

???

"His name is Arataki-"

You

"Itto. Arataki Itto, right?"

Itto

"I... Woah! Woah- Wait!... You're the Raiden's assistant?!"

You

"Former assistant."

Itto

"Shinobu, you're telling me I've been obsessed over a criminal who used to be the one to put me in jail all the time?! Their face looks so different!"

Shinobu

"My bad, I didn't know that N/N was Y/N. You'll stop with this weird obsession now, right?"

Itto

"I... This is unbelievable!"

You

"Strange... Moving on, Kazuha, what's this about?"

Scaramouche pushed Itto away from you as you spoke with Kazuha.

he's jealous guys 😆

Kazuha

"From your first escape, Itto and Shinobu followed you-"

You

"I had the feeling we were being followed, but I didn't see it as much of a threat."

Shinobu

"I only came with because Itto is my responsibility. He almost drowned five times on the way to this island."

Kazuha

"... Right. It took them longer to get here, so by the time they arrived, you two were already on your date."

Itto

"Wow! A date with N/N, that's crazy!"

Scaramouche

"Shut it."

Itto's hands were bound with rope by the time you looked at Scaramouche and Itto, and he was laying flat on Kazuha's bedroom floor.

Kazuha

"Ahem."

"Moving on, the two came to this house and I saw them through my window, so I obviously had to say something."

.

.

.

-A FEW HOURS AGO, FLASHBACK-

Kazuha

"Itto, Shinobu?!"

Itto

"Oh hey! It's the little man!"

Kazuha

"Oh..."

Itto

"But... What are you doing in that house?"

Kazuha

"I am now affiliated with N/N and The Balladeer. It's for my own good."

Itto

"N/N?! You're telling me, N/N's in that house right now?! And you get to work with them?! Lucky duck!"

Kazuha

"Ah, I wouldn't say lucky..."

Shinobu

"Please, ignore him. Ever since he saw the whole chase with the Tenryou Commission and N/N, he's adored them. He even followed them all the way to this island since he had so many questions to ask."

Kazuha

"If he wants to... I could perhaps try to talk to N/N about it, and they'll take you in. When I'm with N/N, it's guaranteed that the Raiden Shogun and her troops can't get me here."

Itto

"I never get to go to jail again and I get to live in the same household as N/N?! It's a win-win! Come on, Shinobu."

Shinobu

*Sigh* "You always get yourself into some sort of trouble."

.

.

.

-PRESENT TIME, END OF FLASHBACK-

You

"Oh. So that's what you wanted."

Itto nodded fiercely.

You

"Hm... Fine, I guess. I don't mind being a shield for two more people."

Itto

"Great!"

You

"The only problem is..."

Itto

"There's a problem?! Gosh, there's always gotta be a-"

Scaramouche

"You'll have to sleep on the couch."

Shinobu

"..."

Scaramouche

"... Both of you."

You

"Right."

Itto

"Oh!... That wouldn't be so bad... As long as I'm safe here, I'd hate to be locked up in a cell again."

You

"That small ass couch?"

Shinobu

*Sigh* "We'll manage."

You

"I mean... If Kazuha's fine with sharing a bed or something, then maybe it'll be better?"

Kazuha

"I'm fine with it."

Scaramouche

"Oh please, you're just desperate to sleep with a muscular man by your side."

Kazuha

"I could say the same for you. Isn't Scaramouche's inflatable spacious? And N/N's bed is big enough to have three people sleep in it."

"How about..."

"N/N and Scaramouche-"

Scaramouche

"No. N/N stays in their bed, and I stay on the inflatable, no changes will be made to our arrangements. You guys go figure it out."

Kazuha side-eyed you, expecting a reaction, but you didn't seem to care.

Itto

"Oh... So they're not a couple?"

Kazuha

"Pshh, that's what I thought at first too!"

Shinobu

"What a surprise."

You

"Now it's just awkward. Why does everyone think that way?!"

Itto

"Man... I don't wanna sleep with Kazuha. He smells like weed."

Kazuha

"Hey- I just showered recently!... The scent of weed is... Faint."

Shinobu

"Well, Itto certainly isn't going to fit on that couch... At most, me, and someone else who's around the same size as I could fill up the spaces on the couch, so..."

"How about Itto takes Kazuha's room, and Kazuha and I sleep on the couch?"

Itto

"Now, that's smart thinking, Shinobu!"

You

"... Sounds good to me."

Scaramouche

"Same here. Kazuha?"

Kazuha

"I was enjoying the room... But, since Itto won't fit on the couch, I'd like to let him have as much comfort as he needs. I agree with this arrangement."

You

"Okay- A whole conversation about weed-smelling-Kazuha and sleeping arrangements was not what I expected."

"Moving on, I have rules and options for you two. Kazuha's already made his decision and has heard all the rules."

"You cannot have any contact with anyone outside of this territory. So, your gang members are off-limits from this point on. No contacting them, even if it's an 'emergency' or whatever. Obviously, there's no space left in my home for any more people, so no acceptions to others joining this little... Group we have." 

Itto

"I'm actually about to work with N/N and the Balladeer... This is crazy..."

You

"Yeah, yeah, crazy. You have a choice - You can choose to work with me and Scaramouche outside of the island, or you can choose to help at certain points and stay hidden here. By working, I mean robbery." 

"Obviously. Kazuha's chosen to stay hidden, as he doesn't wish to take part in crime."

"Hmph, 'not a real criminal' my ass. I wish he'd just accept being recognized as a criminal already."

"So, what do you choose?"

Shinobu

"To stay, obviously."

Itto

"To join!"

He shouted, loud and proud.

Shinobu

"... Itto?"

Itto

"Shinobu?"

You

"Wow... Amazing! I like Itto!"

Itto

"Shinobu, Shinobu, did you hear that?! N/N says they like me! I feel so special!"

Shinobu

"Yeah, yeah, I heard them..."

She mumbled.

Scaramouche

"You better not fuck up any of our missions, yeah? If you get caught, then it'll be a hassle to get you back."

Itto

"I won't! I won't get caught!"

He sounded like a child who had just been told that if he kept a secret, he would receive a lollipop.

Shinobu

"Oh, Itto... If Itto's going, I'll have to go too."

You

"Awesome. The more, the merrier."

Itto

"Yay! Shinobu too!"

Shinobu

"Do not treat this as a good thing."

You

"Oh - One more thing, you say nothing of my identity. You do not reveal any descriptions or details about my facial features, my voice, none of that. Everyone knows who the Balladeer is now, so you can run your mouths about his stupid face and his dumb haircut."

Itto

"His stupid face and dumb haircut... Understood!"

Scaramouche

"No- Stop! Don't take that seriously!"

You

"Haha!"

.

.

.

-THE NEXT MORNING, THE KITCHEN-

You

"Wake up! We made eggs!"

From the kitchen, you yelled. Shinobu sprang awake, stretching, and Kazuha was still curled in a comforter on the couch's edge. The light was shining brilliantly through the windows.

Scaramouche was behind the counter as well as you. Scaramouche obviously needed to know how to prepare something other than instant noodles he would always pop in the microwave, so you taught him how to make eggs.

You

"There we go... See! Not bad. They look cute."

Scaramouche

"They look devious and disgusting."

You gasped dramatically.

You

"Oh no, no, don't hurt its feelings. Look now, it's sad."

Scaramouche

"Oh, please."

You

"Come on, accept this compliment! They're cute, no?"

Scaramouche

"No. I just followed instructions."

You

"Well, they look delicious. Let's go wake up Itto and then we can start eating."

"Itto!"

You called for him while wearing an apron and walked into his bedroom which was previously Kazuha's. His bed was a wreck, but he wasn't even in it. Befuddled, you peeked out his open window to find him completing full pull-ups on a thick tree limb.

You

"Uhm... Itto?..."