( gif by hazzawckd < 3 )

disclaimer ! if you want to see what the band members look like, head to the fashion killa chapter in the beginning and look at the updated list. yes, i know they are not animated but they have always been these specific characters. their actions do not reflect who they are in real life and their characters are pre-crazy if they did do something wild.

if you are wanting to listen to the music the titles are showing, head to the spotify playlist associated with this story in the fashion killa chapter.

My alarm blared in my ear drums as I shot out of bed in panic, I gasped out forgetting where I was for a second. It took me a few minutes sitting in the dark to register that I was in my hotel room. I couldn't say I was safe in my room since Hobie broke in yesterday, but I was somewhere familiar and that's all that really matters to me. I looked over at the clock that was on the nightstand, seeing it was four in the morning.

My lamps were still on, the television was at a low volume with George Lopez playing in the background. I shut off the alarm on my phone, realizing I fell asleep in a fetal position in all my clothes yesterday.

I didn't do anything yesterday after he left– I was far too sick and cried in fear, anger and utter disbelief.

The thoughts of what he said stayed with me all night. I didn't feel safe, I thought he was going to come back into my room with a bullet going through my skull in my sleep. I was a light sleeper, the littlest of noise from around me and outside shot me awake in my bed, thinking it was him again coming to finish me off. I couldn't bring myself to turn the lights off, after that figure sat in my room that one night and this happened; I would be damned if I couldn't see my surroundings.

Now that it was time for me to get up, I didn't know if I was happy about that or not.

I did know one thing for sure, I had to get out of this hotel room. I texted Ares last night saying I came down with a bug and wouldn't be able to come up with any designs for the next concert and was happy she didn't care much about it. I was here for looks at the moment.

Staying in this room made me feel like I was locked in solitary confinement. The cream colored walls made my head spin from last night's conversation.

I had to get up and gather my things and get on the bus. Just so I can watch backstage how they don't want to wear my clothes and embarrass me even more for being a groupie stylist. A great achievement to become a stylist, but to a low maintenance band who hates wearing whatever it is.

I got out of bed, my body cramping as I leaned forward to wrap my arms around my stomach from the lack of food I didn't eat yesterday. I had every intention to go and eat somewhere, come up with more styles for the band and relax. But everything came crumbling down when Hobie threatened to put me in my place in a tragic spiral where I couldn't think to stomach anything due to the high nerves I was feeling.

But now my stomach was eating me from the inside out, I had to eat.

I got up and packed my things quickly first before worrying about myself. I didn't need to be the cause of having to turn the bus all the way back around if I forgot something of value; not that they would anyway, but the thought of it brought me to my knees in embarrassment if I did. I threw on red sweats with the logo coca-cola on the side. White nikes air forces, a red sweatshirt with a black logo of a spiderweb on it, a set of jewelry on my fingers and neck with a black tank top and of course, these vintage glasses my siblings gave me. I tried my hardest to feel like myself today, I was so lost in everything going on around me. I wanted to call my mom or sister, I wanted to call Deja and June, I wanted to call Vanity, Eliana and Moni; but I was scared to tell anyone what was happening.

I'm scared he would find out.

He gave me my phone back and then left. For all he knows I could run to the police station and have him arrested, but I just knew he knew I wouldn't do that.

I won't do it not because I care about him, but because he is so relaxed. He's relaxed about the whole thing like he has the world wrapped around his fingers and that in itself bothers me. He is relaxed because he knows no matter what I do, I won't go to the police and it won't work. He's trusting that gut feeling that I won't say anything because he is untouchable. I have nothing against him.

And if I do go to the police, he will kill me.

I finished getting all my bags together and making myself look more presentable, dabbing foundation under my eyes to hide the bags that formed from the past few days. I planned to grab a few little snacks that were sitting on the counter of the front desk for the bus. My stomach was beginning to cramp even more, I could feel my rib cage.

My feet carried me down the elegant lobby, eyes burning into the ground from the lack of sleep and trying to avoid anyone who might pick up I was a walking zombie. Ever since yesterday, this empty and heavy feeling stayed in my chest for as long as I could recall; it was like a boulder was weighing on my heart. I was tired, worn out.

The closer I got to the doors, I could make out Ares' figure standing outside in the dark with a quick glimpse of Ciera running past to get in a car as it took off ahead of everyone. Probably to make sure the financial part of the tour was good at the next venue.

For some reason I was nervous to talk to Ares—questions lingered all in my head about how she could be involved with this all. Does she know and want to just cover it up? Or does she know and get paid well to keep her mouth shut?

The sliding doors revealed my spot as she looked over her shoulder to hold up one finger before pointing to the buses, turning her head back to go back on the phone with whoever was up at this godly hour.

My bags were taken by some of the helpers, my pace quickening to get on bus 1. I repeated the number over and over to make sure I got on the right one. When I got on, I didn't talk to anyone and went straight to my bed to sleep. I felt better here, safer knowing he was on his own bus and needed to stay there. Not come terrorizing me anymore than he already has.

I clung to the sheets and laid my head on the silk pillowcase, closing my eyes to try and get a few hours of sleep before we get to the other city. The feeling of hunger was the only thing keeping me up, so I reached down to grab the snacks from my backpack before leaning on my elbow to properly eat and not choke.

My headphones caught my attention and of course I knew the best way to help me sleep was some ambience of the Pandora rainforest. Searching through the bag to find my phone, my phone screen lit up to show where it was and to also show I had a text. The number was unknown, I furrowed my brows as I clicked on the message to open it.

UNKNOWN: Heard you might need a friend..

Y: Who is this.

I sent the text, not in the mood for games. My chest rose up and down as I sat waiting impatiently, too nervous to even put my phone down. Eventually the little bubble appeared and another blue message popped up.

UNKNOWN: Only the best tour guide around.

My face dropped along with my shoulders before I let out a loud groan into my pillow. I was glad it wasn't Hobie, the last thing I needed was his number in my phone and him hacking me somehow.

Y: How did you get my number?

I breathed out in slight comfort, even though I hated him it was better than Hobie.

R: Vanity reached out to Eliana who reached out to me to message you, everyone is out of the country for work and Vanity asked if I could talk to you. Heard you not having that good of a time.

I huffed reading it, sad that this was the least stressful experience since I have been here.

Y: How nice of them.

R: Is everything okay?
R: Look, I wanted to apologize about our last conversation. I was in a bad mindset and shouldn't have done what I did at the party and shouldn't have said what I said.

Y: Yeah, it was pretty shitty of you.

I paused what I was saying before sighing, was it really worth all of this if I didn't have at least one friend?

Y: I don't forgive you, but I don't care anymore. Just don't think I'll let you give me a tour when I get back.

R: Fair enough. Thank you.
R: Soooo, how is the tour going? It only just started, right?

Y: Sadly. I'm ready to go home already, I miss the girls and their bickering over who gets the last pancake.

R: I'm sure it can't be that bad. You do get to hang out with Hobie and everyone else.

Y: The most amazing band in the world.

R: That bad, huh?

I froze, the constant ringing of wanting to tell at least someone who was beginning to become more and more tempting, but I didn't know what to do if Hobie found out. I stared at the text, occasionally typing out 'help me.' or 'He threatened me.' After two minutes of going back and forth with what to say, he sends another text.

R: Sorry, I get it if you can't talk about certain things on tour.

Y: Nah, it's not that. Just a big adjustment from my everyday life to this. You know how it goes, heard you had a huge change when you met with the president.

R: So you heard about that. Yeah, basically blacklisted me; but it is what it is. I'm sorry for hurting you.

I paused, reading those words meant a lot to me with everything that has been going on. I haven't gotten a single apology from Hobie since this all started, since he started terrorizing me and here Rex is saying he was sorry for something that happened months ago. It wasn't from Hobie, but it was from Rex and that made me feel a lot better.

Y: Don't apologize, just don't do it to me or anyone else. I did dump a drink on you and embarrassed the fuck out of you at Kash's party.

R: That was bad ass, can't believe you did that. No one let me live it down for days.
R: Do you think we can start over now? As friends.

Y: The way this tour is going, I wouldn't mind at all. I'm (Y/N).

R: And I'm Rex. The city's best tour guide. ;)

Y: What a pleasure. I will be taking my leave to nap now.

R: Who naps at the break of dawn?

Y: Goodnight, Rex.

I shut off my phone, placing it beside me with it plugged into the charger that was installed on my wall in my bunk. My head fell back onto the pillow. I sighed moreso to myself when I realized how much I missed Shawn. The last time I saw a post about him, he was in Canada for lacrosse at an open scrimmage. I felt guilty for never texting him back, but what could I say without crying whenever I heard his voice?

I've avoided talking to my family, Sydni and Tiana because I knew the minute they asked me how I am, I would break down in tears. I can't tell them what I'm going through, not when I have too much fear in my body that he would come out of nowhere and hurt me. Hurt them. Sadly, I had to pretend all was fine and keep them out of this. I know the second I mention my problems is that they will run to the police without listening to me first, and if the police can't do anything about it and Hobie finds out; I would royally be screwed. So would anyone else who knew.

I still don't fully understand what they do and why they did it, but it looked and sounded like they were just trying to find someone with the questions they were asking. With all this chaos going on, I couldn't wrap my head around just how dangerous Opium, Rico, Crass and Ozzy were. Hobie has been on my mind the whole time, he is the one who has approached me on multiple occasions with threats. I was scared of them, but I was terrified of him.

To everyone around them, they are just a low maintenance band with a leader who doesn't like being consistent. They hate the public eye, they don't socialize with anyone and they are absolutely, positively, the most dangerous people in the world.

He is a walking devil.