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❛ ᴇᴛᴏɪʟᴇ​​​​​​​​​​. ❜ ° . ༄
- ͙۪۪˚   ▎❛ 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄 ❜   ▎˚ ͙۪۪̥◌
»»————- ꒰ ᴅᴀᴍsᴇʟ ɪɴ ᴅɪsᴛʀᴇss ꒱


❝ IF I WANTED TO
KILL YOU, YOU'D BE
DEAD BY NOW ❞

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A S G A R D

There was a rush of horror as she saw the Frost Giant bowl into her husband with the same amount of force behind Thor's swings of Mjolnir. Time seemed to slow down as she watched him get pinned under the giant's weight, his smaller, lithe frame more of hindrance in this case. Then there was a surge of protective anger at the sight of them grappling together, and Eleanora wasted no time in summoning her source. Her silvery light flared brighter in response, standing out starkly against the blackness of space.

She let loose a whip of light, hoping to distract the Jotun so that Loki could get the upper hand, but his focus was solely on the younger brother for the time being. The god called out her name and she felt a spark of pride that he was asking for her help. The thought alone was enough to make her redouble her efforts, her magical strength seeming to be increased by the celestial power of the Bridge beneath her feet. For the first time, she called upon more than one branch of her light to aid her in restraining the giant. Her mustered ropes attached to the creature's arms and legs, holding him back so that her husband could roll away from its grasp.

A burst of excitement followed accomplishment since she had never been able to control so many individual strands before— and it seemed to work. Loki was let go, rolling away from the Jotun. . . Her eyes widened as she realized how close he was to the edge, something which didn't seem to occur to him as he kept rolling, rolling, rolling due to the vigor with which he'd freed himself.

Loki only seemed to realize this precious seconds later as he suddenly flailed to stop his motion. Her heart leapt in her throat. She thought about releasing the Jotun to help him, but then it might give the giant the chance to deliver the final blow himself. She could only watch in horror as, first, his leg hit the empty air, then his arm, then—

He seemed to hang, suspended for a moment, as gravity tried to decide what to do with him. His gaze clashed with hers and a myriad of expressions crossed his face during the instant their eyes met: panic, a hint of fear, acceptance, love, and lastly an apology. Then, the god let go and sank into the oblivion far below.

She didn't remember much after that.

There was her own panic, the anguish that seemed to tear her heart in two and the urgency to throw herself after him without hesitation. Her magic responded to her emotions, exploding to life and rending the giant she held captive to nothing. Eleanora wasted no time in launching herself towards the edge of the Rainbow Bridge, unafraid of what awaited beneath except for the need to follow her husband.

Before her foot could even step over the lip of the road, though, her body hit an invisible wall. She was flung backward to land against the colorful surface as she stared uncomprehendingly at the unseen barrier. That was when her grief reached its greatest height, swamping all other emotions as she grasped the fate that awaited her husband.

Eleanora was hardly aware of what Thor was doing during this time, but he had finished his fight with the other Jotuns in time to see his brother veer towards the rim. He'd leapt after him in an attempt to catch the god before he fell, but gravity had caught hold of Loki first. As he fell out of sight, Thor bellowed out his brother's name: "LOKI!"

That's when he noticed the changes around him. The white electricity continued to crackle inside the watchtower as the final Jotun tried to control the Bifrost, but that wasn't the most notable difference. There was a humming in the air, like a swarm of a thousand bees had abruptly decided to reside in his ears. He could feel the buzz of energy on his skin— which was saying something, considering he was the God of Thunder. And— did space suddenly seem more colorful, or were the rainbow hues on the Bridge glowing brighter?

He looked around for the cause, pushing aside his own sadness at the loss of his brother for the time being. A white light— different than the Bifrost; this one was tinged with silver— glowed halfway between him and the golden orb at the end of the Bridge. Thor felt his heart stop in his chest as he comprehended who was creating that light.

The prince began to walk towards her, raising an arm against the blast of heat and energy she was giving off. "Eleanora! Sister, please listen to me!"

As he slowly got closer to her, he could hear a great splitting sound as the Bridge groaned in accordance with her power. He knew that they were both works of space and thus they could harmonize, though he couldn't remember their details of their connection (and in the back of his mind, his heart gave a painful twinge at the thought that Loki would.)

Of course, Eleanora did not listen to him, no matter how he called to her. The rainbow hues blended into her silver light, forming a blinding prism of color against the darkness of space. The spiderweb fissures that had begun to form grew larger. Thor began to understand that he wouldn't be able to stop what she was doing, not without harming her— and that was the last thing he wanted to do. Heimdall was still frozen on the other side of the rift she was creating, the one destined to follow her husband into the Void; that was something he could do: prevent one more unnecessary loss for this day.

He flew to lift the ice-sculpture of the Gatekeeper out of harm's way, his progress incremental against the wave of the Star's power. Thor moved Heimdall to safety, flying out of reach of the Star's power to put him on the side closer to Asgard. The crackling energy from Eleanora's outburst intensified, causing the very fabric of the Rainbow Bridge to tremble. The once stable structure now seemed fragile, on the verge of collapse under the force of her despair-fueled power.

Her anguish knew no bounds as she continued to pour her magical energy into the destruction of the Rainbow Bridge. Her mind was consumed by the image of Loki's fall, replaying it over and over again with each surge of power she unleashed.

Thor knew that he had to reach her, to somehow break through the wall of grief that enveloped her. Despite the danger, he stepped forward, his voice ringing out above the tumult.

"Eleanora!" he called, his tone commanding yet filled with desperation. "You must stop this madness! It was you who convinced Loki to step down from utter destruction! Do the same for yourself!"

But Eleanora was lost in her own world of pain, her eyes ablaze with raw emotion as she unleashed wave after wave of destructive energy. The fractures in the Bridge widened further, threatening to tear it apart completely. Now top heavy, the side with the watchtower tilted precariously towards the Void as the cracks loosened its connection to the rest of Asgard.

With a last, furious cry of grief that seemed to resonate in his very bones, the supernova blast of light and heat sent shards of the Rainbow bridge flying in every direction. The surge of power that came from such an explosion upended everything, sending great waves of water sloshing over the broken road. A forcefield of pure energy rippled out from either side of the Star.

Thor and Heimdall-the-ice-statue were flung backwards, hard enough to free the guard from his frozen confinement. The light of the Bifrost flickered out, paling in comparison to the illumination that came from Eleanora's detonation. As the orb fell into the Void, the blonde's power subsided, leaving her as just a woman once more. Her body let out a limp 'flop' sound as she collapsed at the very edge of the now-broken Bridge. When Thor went to pick her up, the heat from her skin seared his enough that he had to wrap his cape around her to protect himself.

✧ ✧ ✧

After that, Eleanora had sunk into a deep, dark sleep that was only briefly illuminated by the same flashes her powers had created with the destruction of the Rainbow Bridge. She didn't know how long she had been out but it wasn't long enough, in her opinion. Loki was still gone— gone, not dead, because she would know if he was, and she fully believed that he was still alive, somewhere. What really drove the knife into her heart was that no one except Frigga and Thor seemed too torn up about it.

The other Asgardians were either busy celebrating the Allfather's reawakening, the crown prince's success of defeating the Jotuns, or lamented about their loss of connection to the other realms. No one mourned the true loss of the whole affair: her husband, whose absence made it feel as if a piece of herself was missing. She felt empty, devoid of any emotion except desolation and misery. Loki had been her only true tie to Asgard, the one person who'd made her feel respected and wanted. Luckily, no one seemed to know quite how the Bridge was destroyed or she would be on the receiving end of some very nasty looks, but she thought that she would rather have their fury than their pity.

From the day she had awoken, she could be found in two— soon to be three— places: the library, the gardens (both of which were Loki's favorite places) and making evening visits to Heimdall. The library, because she did not have much magical knowledge apart from her own abilities. The Asgardian knowledge collection was vast and covered countless topics, including (she hoped) how to find those who were Lost. She spent almost every night amongst the tomes because she could not bear to go to bed alone, not after so many centuries of sleeping by her husband's side. Waking up without him was almost worse, so she could avoid both if she simply never slept at all.

It was in the second place that she received two visitors, one expected and the other quite the opposite. Eleanora sat on the same garden bench each day to practice her drawing as a way to distract her mind. It proved both helpful and futile because all of her attempts at capturing the flowers in front of her turned into portraits of her lost husband. Thor was, unsurprisingly, her first caller.

He sat down next to her unannounced, his usual exuberant presence dimmed from both the absence of his brother and the mortal he had met on Midgard. Eleanora felt a twinge of guilt at the latter since that could have been preventable had she even tried to control her powers that day. It did not seem like he bared any ill will towards her, though, for which she was grateful. Although it was painful knowing that he was the brother who had survived, it was better than being alone; he was one of the few people who shared her grief— and one of the fewer still who thought there might be even a sliver of a chance that Loki was alive.

"Sister," he greeted her warmly, his gaze taking in the garden in front of them before it fell on her paper. His expression (predictably) softened as the half-drawn image of his brother stared up at him.

"Brother," she replied. Her voice was quiet and slightly rough from lack of use; there were many days she went without speaking at all.

"I plan to see Heimdall tonight," Thor said conversationally. "I would be honored if you joined me for the walk."

The blonde played with her pen, weaving it through her fingers. "Can Heimdall really see into the Void? And what right do I have to ask him such, having been the one to destroy his landmark?"

"He does not hold any hostility towards you for your actions," he reassured her. "If you do not believe me, you can ask for his forgiveness among your other questions. I am sure he will give it to you freely."

Eleanora sighed and absentmindedly scratched at the corner of her paper with her pen. "I will think about it."

The crown prince placed a heavy, warm hand on her shoulder as a show of solidarity. "I hope to see you later then, sister."

✧ ✧ ✧

Her next guest was far less sympathetic, and her presence was announced by a dagger flying past Eleanora's head.

The Star jumped, jerking her head out of the way as her eyes widened at the sight of the blade that was now embedded in the garden wall. Lady Sif stalked towards her with an inscrutable expression on her face, her blue eyes hard as ice chips. "Get up."

"Sif!" she exclaimed; her heart sent pounding in her chest at the unexpected assault. "I know you don't like me very much, but I didn't think you wanted to kill me!"

The brunette regarded her impassively as she retrieved her weapon, pulling it out with a harsh tug. "If I wanted to kill you, you'd be dead by now," she replied. "You're a sitting duck."

"I'm not expecting to be attacked while drawing in the garden!"

"You should be," the warrior informed her bluntly. "You're a Star; you were kidnapped by Jotuns as you walked through the palace halls. Any manner of species could catch you on the unawares."

Eleanora gave her a doubtful look. "We don't have the Bifrost anymore; who would be able to kidnap me?"

Sif scoffed. "I may not have any magical abilities, but I've known Loki long enough to know that there's more than one way into this realm. If you want to still be alive when he gets back, you are going to have to continue your training. I know you've stopped seeing the queen for your daily power exercises. You will pick them back up post haste."

She took a minute to catch up to everything the woman spoke of in her short lecture. First of all, the unpleasant reminder that Sif and Loki had history (because of course Sif had to bring it up.) Then, was she suggesting she was going to train her? Finally, the wince of guilt at her avoidance of Frigga's tutoring. And— wait a second. Did Sif just refer to Loki in the present? She had said 'when' and not 'if,' right?

"What do you mean, when?" the blonde asked, her voice full of hope and disbelief.

The brunette stared at her with another unimpressed look. "Do you truly think me so stupid that I do not know of Loki's penchant for survival? He has always aspired to be the best at everything, so it should come as no surprise for him to be the first to successfully endure the Void. While you and I disagree on many things, this is one subject on which we can agree."

Eleanora didn't care what Sif said next; the warrior was the first person to actively side with her on the 'Loki-isn't-dead' argument. Thor believed her to some extent but that was mostly naïve hope rather than the full, unequivocable truth that she knew in the very marrow of her bones. But Sif— who was the last person she ever expected to support her— held not a single note of doubt in her tone as she spoke.

"You really think he will? Come back, I mean," she breathed out.

"Of course he will— but he will not be the same Loki who left," the other woman warned her. "I do not claim to know anything about the place where he went except that it is full of evil. It will twist his spirit, his very soul, into something unrecognizable and you must be prepared to meet him when the time comes. You are woefully incompetent right now, hence why you must hone your skills."

She frowned at the insult but decided not to argue about the word choice. "But Loki has been teaching me. I'm much better than I used to be!"

"He went easy on you," Sif told her, to which Eleanora thoroughly disagreed. "He was soft because he cared about you— but I have no such qualms. You are lucky that your existence is directly related to both Thor and Loki's happiness, or else I would not bother. Now, as I said before, get up."

"But I'm drawing!"

"I don't care," came the brunette's apathetic reply, which was followed by a yelp from the blonde as the dagger came soaring towards her once more.

✧ ✧ ✧

Later that night, despite her exhaustion and soreness from Sif's nearly-quite-literal torture, Eleanora joined Thor on the edge of Asgard to begin their walk to Heimdall. He smiled brightly at her, probably having assumed she wouldn't join him. And he would have been right, had it not been for Sif's hard-hearted approach, which had snapped her out of the depression she'd been in. She had even gone to Frigga, apologized for abandoning their training sessions, and asked if they could start again.

Now, instead of moping around the palace, she was filled with purpose. Her mornings were spent with Sif while the Allmother instructed her in the afternoon. The nights were still for research, leaving her with very little time to get lost in her despairing thoughts. Eleanora believed Sif when she said that Loki would be different when he returned, and she wanted to change with him. She had to be tougher, to be his strength when he had none, and to be his courage when he was afraid.

But she would also keep the promise she'd made to her mother nearly a millennia ago now: to have courage and choose kindness, even in the most difficult situations, has power, more than you know. And magic. Life is filled with challenges, my dear, and not everyone will understand your kind heart. But never let the world harden you.

It was with this in mind that the first words she blurted out to Heimdall was an apology: "I'm sorry. I should have had more control over my powers. I should have known when to stop. I shouldn't have resorted to—"

The Gatekeeper let his lips quirk in the faintest of smiles as he raised a hand to interrupt her. "There is no need for apologies, my lady, but if you truly seek my forgiveness, then you have it. The Bridge can be rebuilt; it relieves me that you survived."

"Oh," she responded, relieved that he did not blame her for losing the Bifrost. "Thank you. I, um, think you can guess my next question— though that's not the only reason why I came out here tonight."

He inclined his head as his eyes turned back to the cosmos. "I cannot See Loki, but I would not despair. He could very likely be shrouded from me, as you well know. It is not impossible to make it out of the Void."

"And Jane?" Thor inquired, looking out at the stars as well, though of course he could not see what Heimdall Saw.

"She is well," the guard reassured him, his gaze focusing on the far-away Midgard. "She searches for you."