The dreams stopped. I didn't need them anymore. I had the truth, and I had Frank. But I also had a pounding headache rising and stunning me awake.

I noticed that my head was lying on Frank's chest once my eyes had managed to open. I looked around confusedly. I was lying next to Frank, in his bed. My fly was open, as if my pants had started to be taken off. Oh my God, what happened yesterday?

I sat up and rubbed my eyes with two of my fingers, progressively recalling what had happened as Frank started stirring the way I was minutes ago.

I winced from my killer migraine. I hadn't thought that my reckless decisions would have led to such physical pain against emotional soothing.

Frank stirred in a way that remotely reminded me of a cat. The thought made me smile a little. " 'Morning, Buttercup," I heard right next to my ear as I felt the slight weight of Frank's head on my shoulder as he rested his chin there. His voice appeased me. No, his mere presence did.

"What time is it?" I asked before looking at the time on my phone myself. It was Monday, 11:34 a.m.

"Oh, for fuck's sake..." I groaned.

"What is it?" Frank asked, standing up from the bed.

"We missed school this morning."

"Wow, hold on, I'll get the rope so we can hang ourselves. What a tragedy."

I sighed. "My parents are gonna rip my head off. I vanished without warning anyone. They're pretty strict," I informed, standing up to fix my pants.

"Wow, if they are 'pretty strict' to you, I prefer not to wonder about the opinion I'll have of them," Frank commented.

He put his hands on my hips and gently brought me a little closer. He hesitantly leaned forward before stopping inches from my lips.

"Are you still okay with me kissing you?" he asked carefully. It took me time to process a question which answer was so obvious to me. "I thought that perhaps after obtaining what you wanted from me - the truth - you'd lose interest in me and leave."

"Well, I'm still there, aren't I?" I said softly, capturing his lips with my own in a short kiss. "You piqued my curiosity, to say the least. I misjudged you. I'm sorry."

"We're both sorry, but I don't think we should drown in regrets of past mistakes. Regrets are poison. Let's move on."

I hummed. Frank and I kissed deeply, before being rudely interrupted by the ringtone of my phone. Frank broke the kiss to let me answer. 'I'll take care of that', he mouthed to me, pointing at my own vomit from yesterday that I hadn't had time to clean up. God bless Frank Iero.

I answered the call and heard my father's voice. "Dad?" I said and Frank looked up at me when I uttered the word.

"Gerard? Your school called. Why weren't you in class this morning?"

His voice sounded suspicious. I started panicking slightly. "I visited Grandma's grave. I was feeling a little sick so I couldn't go to school, sorry."

"Where are you, son?" Dad inquired. I gulped nervously.

"I-I'm at Lindsey's house. I spent the night there," I said, making eye contact with Frank. I felt ashamed to lie about that, especially in front of Frank. I must have hurt him... But I remembered how much my father disapproved Frank and our relationship. Lying was the only way.

"You better not be lying to me, boy. I'm going to phone your girlfriend's parents."

"I'm not, trust me. Um, bye Dad." I hung up and sighed.

"So, daddy's mad at you?" Frank asked while finishing to clean the floor.

I hummed. "Kinda. Sorry, by the way."

"For what?"

"Lying. Not telling him that I was with you. My dad really hates you. I'm so sorry."

"A lot of people hate me," Frank shrugged. "It's not keeping me from sleeping at night, honestly. And yeah, you still have a foot in the closet. It's okay, I understand what it's like to have a crappy, tight-assed family."

"Yeah... Shit, I have to call Lindsey. My dad is surely gonna phone her parents but they're on a trip or something. I have to warn her my dad's gonna call."

Frank chuckled. "Alright, genius. You're a bit of a schemer but I love you anyway."

I grinned and dialed Lindsey's number. I pressed 'call', and right then, a thought hit me.

I had just cheated on her. I made out with Frank. We almost had sex; we would have if we hadn't been so intoxicated.

Remorse hit me a bit more everytime the phone rang. I found myself wishing she would find out, refuse to lie for me, and then we'd make up, my dad would get pissed but at least they would all bring me back on the right path.

No. No, there is no 'right path'. There is only the path I was meant to follow. There is only fate and nothing else, and fate had decided that I belonged with Frank. If I didn't, Frank and I would never have-

"Gerard?" Lindsey's voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Y-yeah, hi," I let out awkwardly. My conscience reminded me that I was nothing but a cheating bastard who was going to ask her to lie for me anyway. That was nothing but the blunt truth.

"Oh my God, are you okay? I've been trying to reach out to you for day ! You didn't even go to school this morning. That's not like you. What's going on? I'm concerned..." The confused flood of words escaped her mouth rapidly to reach my ears.

"I... I'm fine. Kinda. I need you to do me a favor. I didn't spend the night at my house, and I missed school this morning and I lied to my dad, telling him I was at your place. So, I need you to tell him, please."

"Sure, but where did you spend the night, then?"

"Um... At Frank's?"

"...You what?"

I sighed. "Lindsey I... Remember Helena? Well, she... She passed away. I went to the cemetery and visited her grave. I was feeling sick. But I'm okay now," I said, making eye contact with Frank who was done cleaning my vomit.

"Oh my God, Gee, I'm so sorry ! I know how much she mattered to you. I can only imagine how devastated you must be."

"It's okay. I mean, not really, actually. I was feeling terrible - Mikey might have told you. I went to the cemetery and visited her grave. It was pouring and Frank happened to be there. So, I just spent the night there," I said.

"Alright, I understand. I guess Mikey knows for Helena."

"He does. He's not doing very well either, but he will get through it." I rubbed my eyes with two of my fingers.

"You will, too. Don't worry. I'll see what I can do for your dad. I'll cover for you. Please come back soon though. I miss you. Oh, and Gee?"

"Yes?"

"I'm so sorry for your loss. You'll get over it. Just... Don't do anything stupid, okay? I'm here for you."

I hummed thoughtfully and told her bye before hanging up. I sat down on the bed. "Wow. You lied to your girlfriend dearest," Frank commented.

"What?" I tilted my head. "I didn't. I told her most of the truth. I told her I was with you, and I could have lied about it. She just didn't need to know the rest. It would have hurt her."

"How is that different from lying, though? You omitted a part of the truth to manipulate her."

"Where are you going with this?"

"That you don't actually love your girlfriend as much as you think you do, or as much as she'd want you to. That's a fact."

"I lied to protect her !" I defended. "Hence the necessity of lying." I folded my arms defensively, knowing that he was right.

I should break up with her instead of lying and cheating. But a part of me wanted to preserve her and make her believe that everything was okay, because I cared about her and always would. But it was incompatible with dating Frank. I knew I would have to choose eventually.

Unconsciously, my choice was already made, yet I would do anything to postpone it. Making a choice implies renouncing, but I didn't want to lose or hurt anyone.

"You want to protect her. Yet you cheated on her," Frank pointed out, making me face my paradoxical actions. "You are gay, and you know it, yet you keep fueling her illusion that you are in love with her. You're deceiving her. I am no angel, but you clearly aren't one either."

I sighed and sat on Frank's bed. "You're messing with me. I just... I don't know. I think I love you, but I still care about her. I don't want to break her heart."

I cared about Lindsey, but knowing what I knew, it was hard to deny my feelings for Frank. It was sweet of Lindsey to cover for me, but right now, all I needed was Frank. He was the only one who could get how I was feeling, because he had gone through it. He was the only one who understood.

Frank sat down next to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "I understand that you need time to adjust to your own feelings. Focus on that, don't worry about mine."

I frowned a little. Frank reached for my face and traced my lower lip with the pad of his thumb as if he were either asking for something or checking that I was real. "I know perfectly how I'm feeling," he said softly as though he was speaking to himself. "Can I kiss you?"

My lips on his were my answer. Frank moved his lips on mine almost chastely. I sensed his hands resting on my hips and his cold lip ring on my lower lip.

"I want to help you," Frank told me as soon as we pulled apart. "I really do. I know what you're going through all too well. And I also know how to make it hurt less. The pain will never go away completely. The marks our loved ones leave on you are too often scars."

"How did you do it?" I asked quietly. "How did you erase these scars?"

"I never did. I blunt them. I learned how to leave with them. I'll help you do the same. First, you're going to need a slight makeover."

"A makeover? What for?"

"I'm going to help you grieve. That's the most important thing. For that, you're gonna have to change, adapt. Take out your pain. This..." Frank pointed at my shirt and blonde hair. "...isn't you. I know who Gerard Way is and what he truly needs. I can guide you. I got you back, Gee, I can feel it. But you're gonna have to learn how to be yourself again."

I let Frank lead me. He took my hand and I followed him outside. We went shopping; we spent quite some time in an odd store called 'Hot Topic'. They sold interesting things. We went back to Frank's house after we bought a few outfits for me, along with some hair dye.

"Let me take care of you," Frank said softly, unpacking the hair dye. He prepared everything and helped me take off my old shirt to apply the dye. "Are you well acquainted with the concept of catharsis?" he asked as he massaged my scalp on which he had poured the hair dye.

I frowned a little. "Hum... I don't think so. What's that?"

"The word 'catharsis' comes from ancient Greek. It means 'to purify'. It's a process through which one purifies themself from vices and emotions, especially the negative ones. Emotional release, if you will. The best means for catharsis is art - theater plays when it vomes to ancient Greece, but all kinds of art too."

"How does it work, exactly?"

"Well, you witness a scene with intense emotions, and such a show purges you from your own vices. Embrace the pain, take it all in, and then..." Frank's gloved fingers glided on my bare shoulders. "...let it all go."

It felt as though I had traded my skin for another. People would be surprised to say the least. Perhaps they would even be scared, or disgusted. I wasn't fully comfortable with the thought of people's disappointed judgment, but Frank had assured me that I would soon stop caring. That's all I asked for, in fact.

I stood in front of the glass, admiring the drastic change. I was almost frightening myself. Frank stepped behind me and rested his chin on my shoulder. "You look fantastic. I'll never believe you're ugly."

I looked at him and I smiled. I checked myself out in the mirror and a smirk appeared on my face.

My hair was darker than the blackest night. And my tie, it was a red so bright that it seemed as though it was bleeding into the air around it. It was radiant. As to my black jacket, it was somewhat classy and felt so nice to the touch, so silky.

''I love the outfit," I stated, combing my disheveled, jet black hair. "Why all black, though?"

I saw in the mirror Frank smirk behind me. "To mourn the livings," he simply said before planting a kiss on my pale cheek on which I hoped no tear would roll anymore.

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