Avery waved at her colleague, who took a different route before heading to her car where a not exactly great surprise awaited her. With a sour expression, she walked towards Kim, who was waiting completely calmly outside Avery's car, her arms crossed.

"What the hell do you want?", the redhead snarled, clearly annoyed.

"I told you I wasn't done with you yet." Kim shrugged naturally, unimpressed by Avery's cold gaze, which suddenly darkened.

Avery's eyebrow shot up. "And what exactly are you planning to do? You want to start a fight? Throw hands? I'll have to disappoint you, but I won't get into that."

As much as she wanted to show Kim that she shouldn't mess with her, Avery definitely wouldn't do that right in front of a pre school building. Even if all the children have already been picked up, it was still possible that someone could see her. What impression would that leave on the parents who entrusted her with their kids every day?

There was simply too much that she could lose and she had to decide what was more important to her. But she definitely wasn't going to give Kim what she wanted.

"Oh no, nothing like that", the blonde hummed after stepping closer to Avery.

Her hand disappeared into the dark bag, which Kim let slide from her shoulder to the crook of her arm. "I have something much better that I can use to ruin everything for you without even having to touch or insult you."

Avery could only shake her head at such audacity. With a snort, she pushed the blonde aside, not willing to pay her any more attentionᅳ she wouldn't waste her time for that bitch. Plus, Avery also had to pick up Debbie since Happy would be out dealing with some club stuff until tonight.

Kim quickly grabbed the redhead's arm as Avery opened her car door and wanted to slip inside. The blonde's gaze was so cold that even Avery felt a shiver run down her spine. And just a few seconds later something was pushed into her hand.

"Now we'll see how important Happy and my daughter are to you." Kim leaned forward so her lips were just inches from Avery's ear.

"You won't find better stuff in Charming, enjoy it", Kim purred, then she stepped back with a grin and strolled down the sidewalk as if nothing had happened, the clicking of her heels the only thing Avery was still able to hear as her blue eyes were glued on the bag in her hand.

She didn't need to see the contents to know what was inside. It was enough to slightly close her hand around the paper bag to be able to feel the items inside. A syringe, then something cool in the shape of a spoon and some softer thingsᅳ probably the drugs to make it easier for her to shoot up right away.

Sweat formed on her forehead while the lump in her throat almost chocked her. Stomach acid rose in her throat due to the suddenly rapidly increasing pulse, which increased drastically in a matter of seconds and made her feel like she was about to pass out. Her already pale skin now completely lost all color as she stood between the car door.

She could have easily thrown the bag into the trash can that was on the side of the road next to her carᅳ but she couldn't. The bag was literally glued to her palm, of course not really. But part of her couldn't let go.

It wasn't until someone bumped into her who was in a hurry that she was brought back to reality. She ignored the apology that the slightly older man mumbled, still too lost in her own thoughts.

The young woman swallowed dryly before pushing her shaky hand into the pocket of her leather jacket and slipping the bag in there, not even sure what she intended to do with it. She pressed her lips together to keep herself from letting out a scream of frustration. Then she got in her car, slammed the door shut and drove off to pick up Debbie.

The only thing she could concentrate on at the moment was the, probably very good, heroin in her pocket. And for that she would rip off Kim's head one day, but not right now.

ᚔ

For the third time in the last thirty seconds, Avery knocked on Lyla's door. The third time almost a hammering. To say that Avery was impatient was an understatement. Even Debbie noticed the nervousness that radiated from the redhead.

She looked up at Avery worriedly, her small hand wrapped tightly around her mother's shaky hand. "Are you okay, mommy?"

"I'm okay, sweetie." Avery's smile was weak, the woman barely managing to fake a real one.

Before the almost five-year-old could answer again, Lyla finally opened the door. Debbie greeted her aunt, who seemed quite surprised but still pleased about the spontaneous visit, with a smile and a tight hug.

"Hey sweetie! I didn't know you were coming over today!" Lyla picked her up in her arms, letting out a huff. "Wow, you're getting bigger every day!"

Debbie giggled softly and snuggled up to Lyla. "Are Piper, Elli and Kenny t-there too?"

"Yeah, they're doing homework right now", Lyla explained, lowering her niece back to the ground when she noticed Avery's restless behavior and gently pinched Debbie's nose. "But you can join them, maybe they can need your help", she added with a wink.

"Oh yeah! I'll help t-them!" Without thinking about twice, Debbie took off her shoes and ran down the hallway into the large living room.

Once she was out of sight, Lyla turned back to face her sister and waved her in, confused when Avery just shook her head.

The redhead sniffed nervously and rubbed the tip of her nose. "I have to leave. I actually wanted to ask if you have time to watch Debbie until Happy can pick her up later?"

"Yeah, of course", Lyla nodded quickly, but she wasn't going to give up that easily. Something was wrong with Avery.

She slowly closed the door behind her and stepped closer to Avery, one hand now placed on the redhead's arm. "What's wrong, Avery? You're nervous. Did something happen?"

"No, everything's fine." Avery carefully shook off Lyla's arm and forced another smile onto her dry lips. "Please call Happy for me to come pick Debbie up from you, okay?"

"I'm not just letting you go now", Lyla insisted stubbornly, now reaching for her sister's arm more assertively as Avery tried to turn on her heels. "What is going on here?!"

Irritated, Avery yanked her arm away, unable to remain calm. The nervousness was too strong and her thoughts were too loud. "Nothing, okay?!"

The sisters had never argued, discussed or anything like that. Maybe it was strange, but the Dvorak siblings had always been a well-coordinated team that always got along with each other. Which is why Lyla was even more surprised by Avery's irritated reaction. And this behavior looked too familiar.

Only when the younger Dvorak saw Lyla's expression did she swallow quietly and try to calm down again. "I'm sorry, today was just a stressful day. Can I just leave now?"

The shock on Lyla's face faded, replaced with serious concern. "Are you using again?"

"What?" Avery huffed, the nervous laugh coming from her only making her behavior even more suspicious. "No Iᅳ I just need a few hours to myself, is that so wrong?"

"If that was actually the reason then of course not...but I'm not stupid. I know that behaviorᅳ" before Lyla could finish her sentence, Avery pulled herself out of her older sister's tight grip again and jogged off when she realized that Lyla had seen through her.

She left her car where she had parked it earlier. The redhead had to walk to clear her head and decide what she would do next.

Avery ignored Lyla's worried calls, but that didn't mean it wasn't tearing her heart apart. The last thing she wanted was to worry anyone. But she wasn't able to take care of Debbie right now, she had needed Lyla's help.

ᚔ

"And you thought it was a good idea to let her go and didn't even think it was necessary to call me right away?!" Happy barked at the petite blonde, who had shown up at the clubhouse in desperation a few minutes ago after she still couldn't reach Avery. Six hours had passed and she was worried as fuck.

The calls always went straight to voicemail and Lyla slowly didn't know how to help herself anymore. But she was worried, and she also understood why Happy was so angry. She should've called him immediately, especially given the suspicions she had.

"I didn't want to worry anyone unnecessarily, Happy", the blonde defended herself, rubbing her face. "I'm sorry, I really am."

"Where's Debbie?", he asked in a dangerously low voice, his nostrils flaring with every breath.

"She's still at my house. Ima is watching the kids", she explained quickly, then placed a hand on her chest. "We have to look for her."

"No shit", Happy huffed, who wanted to leave straight away, but Chibs stopped him and pushed him further back into the room. "What the fuck, man?!", Happy growled at the older man.

"You're going home in case she shows up there", the Scot said, his accent thick, before looking at Lyla. "And you do the same."

"Then who the hell is gonna look for Avery?" Happy snarled, his concern not exactly bringing out the best in him. "Who knows what she's doing out there! If Lyla's right, she could have a fucking needle in her arm by now!"

"We'll ride through town and split up", Tig chimed in, squeezing Happy's shoulder. "But Chibs is right, bro. Go home, wait there."

"They're right, man", Jax agreed, putting out his cigarette in the ashtray on the bar counter. "We'll find her. But maybe she's already home."

"You seriously left your kids with a porn star? Ima at that?" Tara asked incredulously, rubbing her forehead with her thumb and forefinger.

"Not now, Tara", Jax said, his tone as serious as his face.

"If you finally gave her a chance, you would realize that Ima is more than just a porn star and actually a great person", Lyla hissed quietly, who just didn't have the nerve to argue with the doctor right now.

Even if Tara wasn't thrilled, the doctor realized that it probably wasn't the right time to talk about this. Besides, even though she rarely got along with any other Old Lady here, even she was worried about Avery. Somehow she genuinely liked the younger Dvorak.

"I'll help, the boys are still with Gemma anyway", she said finally, getting a few surprised looks.

"I can't just go home", the SAA grumbled, rubbing his scalp as he paced around impatiently.

"Yes you can, and that's exactly what you're going t' do now. Come on", Chibs slapped the Killer's back and led him outside to their bikes.

If Happy knew one thing, it was that he was scared shitless for his fiancée. A relapse was possible, he knew that. The best people could relapse. Still, he had always secretly hoped that Avery wouldn't be one of them.

But he would always help her get clean again, that much was certain. His biggest fear was more of an overdose that could kill her. If he thought about it now he would drive himself crazyᅳ but it was fucking hard to think positively.

ᚔ

As if in a daze, she pulled the leather jacket around her body, which was only placed around her shoulders. The redhead loosened the newly purchased belt around her slim upper arm after she had shot up.

Tears pooled in her eyes as she sniffled and pulled her legs close against her body, too weak to stand up. The only good thing was that it didn't get incredibly cold at night in this part of California, so there was no risk of freezing to death.

She wanted to scream, she was so fucking frustrated and hated herself, but right now she was too numb. Her body as well as her emotions. A guilty conscience still plagued her, no matter how numb the Dvorak woman felt at the moment.

The light yet heavy feeling of her body wasn't worth risking her relationship with Happy. She had been so close to getting married, to becoming the mother of an amazing girl. But perhaps they would both be better off without her.

Oh, good old self-sabotage was back. How much the younger Dvorak had missed thatᅳ not.

Despite her foggy mind and weak physical condition, she pulled her phone out of her pocket, the leather jacket slipping off her shoulders again, and typed a message for Happy.

I'm really sorry. I love you and Debs.

Then she hit send and lowered her hands, the phone landing in her lap, before closing her eyes from exhaustion and the high, not thinking about what could happen alone at night right now.

The message she sent Happy may not have been anything special, not many wordsᅳ but at least it was something and she meant those words. She was fucking sorry that she was doing this to Debbie and him. And even though he might forgive her for it, she would never forgive herself for hurting them.

ᚔ

authors note; please don't hate my baby. 🥺 Avery became my favorite character to write and, besides her lovely personality, I wanted to give her flaws [like everyone has them]. Making her picture perfect was never my plan. I thought about letting her relapse for so long but I wanted to make this a little more realisticᅳ so I did. Addiction is horrible and it's super hard to stay clean for most people. Doing this any different wouldn't have made much sense.

By the way, I'm really sorry that it took me so long to update but my daughter is still sick and at home and I wanna be there for her as much as I can. But I'll try to update more regularly again. 🖤