There is written situations involving a therapist's office/therapy, and discussions about relapsing/alcoholism and mental health/anxiety. Please do not read any further if these topics are sensitive to you.

⸻✧ ༺ ∞ ༻ ✧⸻

Winter passes. Layers of fluffy snow melt into growing green grass, branches growing leaves again as spring rips through Seoul. Budding flowers begin to bloom, warmer air settles into the city as daily threats of rain become more frequent. The rise of the sun ascends earlier in the morning rather than later. Birds return, sitting on branches and crafting nests, preparing their home for the arrival of chicks.

Time passes in a haze of tears and forgiveness, comforted by the knowledge of another day bringing a new start with endless possibility.

This day, in particular, the sun was shining, barely hidden by the threat of looming clouds, rays of sunshine breaking into uncovered windows of a neatly organized office space.

Two orange leather sofas sit across from one another, fake plants decorating the corners and shelves, books lining the cubicles pressed against the wall, accented with fresh paintings and awards.

Wooyoung leans back into his seat, chewing on his lip tentatively, eyes casting over the few doctorates framed on the wall ahead of him.

"Wooyoung." A voice adamantly calls him out of his daze, bringing his eyes back down to face the younger female ahead of him. She's taller, petite almost, brown eyes and long black hair hanging over her shoulders, covering parts of the black blazer she had been wearing. She's smiling at him, trying to gauge his expression as she holds her laptop in her lap, waiting for the male to respond to her question. They had been here for forty minutes already, and Wooyoung felt bad for zoning out so frequently.

"I-I'm sorry-" Wooyoung takes a breath. "What did you ask?"

"I asked if your anxiety has gotten better." She says calmly, her voice completely soothing and kind.

"Recently it's been alright. I'm a bit paranoid and stuff still, but I'm not as afraid of being alone."

"Okay. But tell me, what about being alone has changed? I remember that you once told me that you felt like your whole world was ending when you were left by yourself, and how your thoughts sort of made you crumble into a shell of a person. Do you still feel like that?"

"No," Wooyoung glances out of the windows, biting his tongue. "It's. . . it's better now. I can sit alone in my apartment now, and I've turned to reading to keep myself occupied in the times that I'm alone."

"That's good. But the management has been helping?"

"Slowly, yeah." Wooyoung looks back at her, slightly smiling. "It's been easier for me to think before I react and to go through my panic list that we made."

"Good." She nods at him with a hum.

"It's been like, night and day difference. It's weird how well it all works."

"I told you that it would be. Baby steps, though. I don't want to rush your progress."

"I know."

"How is your relationship with San?" She asks while typing away on her computer, peering up after a moment to look at Wooyoung.

"We're good." Wooyoung reassures. "We've finally settled into the new apartment and we've elected Thursdays as date night for just us, and Fridays are nights reserved for us to go out with our friends. I'm learning how to communicate what I want and I'm learning to listen better, but uhm, yeah. Things are good. Things are better."

"That's good," She smiles at him again, continuing to type. "How's your insomnia?"

"I haven't had an issue for a couple of weeks, I think. . . maybe since I last saw you? San and I have a routine now, and it's become easier to go to sleep and to stay asleep."

"That's really relieving to hear. I was growing concerned about your sleeping habits," her typing grows louder before she stops, her left hand moving to grab the top of her laptop and gently close it. "You've been coming to me for two months now, and I'm sure it feels like everything is fixed or is on the way to being repaired, but just know that it's okay to fall down again. But, also remember to get right back up if you do fall. You're strong willed, Wooyoung. I can see how passionate and how full of love you are, and I only hope that with time, you will come to realize how worthy of life and love you are."

"Thank you, Ms. Baek. I can't express in words how thankful I am for your help in all of this."

"Well," She smiles, a sudden buzzing from her phone dragging her attention away. "We can continue this chat in a few weeks, hm?"

"Yeah. Of course."

"Is he waiting for you outside?" She sets her laptop down on the white table to her left, watching Wooyoung carefully.

"He sits outside the entire time I'm here." Wooyoung bites his lower lip. "It's barely an hour, but he insists on driving me here and driving me home, so he waits in the same spot every time."

"He loves you." She mentions, even though she was positive that Wooyoung knew that. "Go spend the day with him and take it easy, okay?"

"I will. I'll see you in two weeks." Wooyoung reaches for his phone, shoving it into his pocket before making his way to the office door, hand on the handle, opening the door and turning to face Ms. Baek, giving her a small wave before leaving.

The walk through the medical office is short as Wooyoung finds the main door, opening it with no trace of hesitation. He spots San's SUV easily, sitting in the same spot it had always been in, walking to the passenger door and tapping on the window before hearing San unlock the doors.

"How was it?" San asks, adjusting the way he had been sitting in the driver's seat.

"Good." Wooyoung settles into his seat, closing the door. "She asked about you again."

"Did she really?" San slightly laughs, turning his keys in the engine.

"She always does. I think she finds it cute that you sit out here while I have my session."

San smiles at him, putting the gear shift into reverse, checking his mirrors as he backs out of the parking space. Wooyoung buckles his seat belt, leaning into his seat, reaching for his phone afterwards.

"So tell me," Wooyoung asks quietly. "What did you do while I was in session?"

"Talked to Seonghwa for a bit," San checks his mirrors again, placing his car into drive as he begins to drive further out of the parking lot. "Apparently, Yunho moved back in with Mingi."

"Did he really?" Wooyoung gasps lightly, a smile curled on his lips.

"Well, y'know the last month they've been talking more since Mingi really apologized, and I guess Yunho forgave him."

"God, it's about time." Wooyoung scoffs, leaning back in his seat. "I get why he was so hesitant, but I never thought that they'd avoid each other for two whole months."

"It was more like Yunho avoiding Mingi, but, I get what you mean." San safely pulls out of the parking lot and drives onto the main road. Once he's able, he places his left hand in the middle of the steering wheel towards the top, his other hand landing palm-up on Wooyoung's thigh. The same gesture, the one Wooyoung had grown accustomed to after every session, lay waiting on his thigh, and he took it readily by slotting their hands together.

"Do you think they'll figure their feelings out?" Wooyoung asks, gaze focused out of the window.

"Who knows?" San brings the car to a stop at a red light, turning to glance at Wooyoung. "I hope they really sit and talk it out. But, as long as they're trying, then I can't really bring myself to pry."

"No, I get it. Did you talk about anything else?"

"Ah, not really. Talked about you for a bit, then about the apartment. Nothing much."

"What about me? Hm?" Wooyoung turns to look at San, watching a smile curl.

"He was asking about how you're doing, stuff like that. Checking in on you. I told him that you've been better and that you've been sleeping, but I also told him that he should call you."

"I miss him," Wooyoung sighs. "He's always working."

"I know. He knows that too. He's trying to get out of it." San assures, squeezing his hand. The light turns green and San turns his gaze back towards the road, beginning to drive again.

"I'm glad it's Wednesday." Wooyoung smiles, looking out of the window again. "That means we have our night tomorrow and then friend night the day after."

"I know, me too." San checks his mirror again, then glances back towards the road. "You gonna be okay at the apartment if I go to my internship after I drop you off?"

"Yes, jagi." Wooyoung squeezes his hand this time, trying to reassure him. "I'm gonna call Yeosang or something, then I'm gonna read. You aren't going to be gone long, right?"

"Right. Just an hour. He wants me to observe a class, or something. I don't remember. It's not a far drive, so I'll be back in time for dinner."

"Sounds fine to me." Wooyoung brings their joint hands up to his lips, pressing a kiss to each of San's knuckles, then to the back of his hand. "I'll be okay, jagi."

San smiles at him, squeezing his hand as he drives, allowing the car to fall into a comfortable silence.

They arrive back to their new apartment within ten minutes of leaving the medical office, walking in the front door and closing it immediately after.

"I'm gonna grab my bag really quick," San mentions as he shoves his keys into his pocket, walking off to the back of the apartment, striding past the living space and kitchen to head into their bedroom. Wooyoung stands by the door, shifting the weight between his feet, messing with the bottom hem of his gray tee. San comes back a few seconds later, bag in hand, smiling as he approaches. "You know the drill."

"Mhm." Wooyoung tilts his head back, feeling San's arms wrap around him. "Call you if I'm stressed. If you don't answer, then I'll call Seonghwa. If he doesn't answer, then I'll call my mom."

"Good." San kisses his forehead. "It's only an hour. I'll be back soon."

"I know. I'll be okay."

"I'll text you when I get there." San removes one of his hands from the small of Wooyoung's back, pressing two fingers beneath his chin, holding it lightly in his grasp. "I love you."

"I love you." Wooyoung mutters back, smiling into the kiss San so delicately places on his lips. "Be safe. Come back to me."

"I will, jagi. See you in a bit, 'kay?"

"Mhm." Wooyoung turns to watch San leave, offering a small wave to him as he closes the door and heads off. Wooyoung is alone in the apartment, as he usually was during the weekdays, but as of late, he doesn't mind it.

The past two months have been full of healing and coping, learning how to unlearn his anxious tendencies to replace his habits with new ones. He no longer feels a plaguing sense of dread coursing through him when he's alone, a fear of abandonment now simmering into something easier to handle. There were still moments of weakness of course, however, Wooyoung had found himself coping easier.

Therapy has helped a huge amount, as had frequent conversations held with his mother every week, but he's come to an understanding with himself that he needs to be gentle and not so harsh with how he chooses to cope. Healing has never been linear, and he knows that now.

There was still broken trust between himself and San, but after talking about it for what had felt like days on end, Wooyoung feels like their relationship had finally come out the other side stronger. San had been more open and careful, where Wooyoung had been more loving and honest, confiding his troubles and discussing the things that he wanted. San would listen, as he always had, but also had begun confiding his worries to Wooyoung, building a new sense of security between them.

They were close to rebuilding their trust between them again, but Wooyoung never wanted to ask if San trusted him outright. He knew that what he did was wrong and rash, but also completely selfish. Though San had forgiven him, he was still struggling to forgive himself. Ms. Baek was a friend of his mother's, and ever since he had started seeing her, an enormous weight drifted off of his shoulders. Wooyoung nearly could laugh at himself at how much he's changed. He's comfortable, relaxed and starting to finally be happy for himself. He's no longer masking his emotions and only being happy for San, instead, he's choosing to be happy with San and learning how to love himself.

It's a tricky road, one that comes with a lot of highs and lows, but without a little rain, there can be no sunshine after the storm. Wooyoung knew that with more time and more patience with himself, he could get a sense of who he used to be back while also turning a new leaf and growing into someone new.

True to his word, Wooyoung strides to the couch, plopping down on the gray furniture before pulling his phone free from his pocket. He scrolls and swipes a few times before dialing Yeosang's number, holding the phone to his ear.

"Wooyoungie!" Yeosang cheerfully exclaims, almost as if he didn't expect the call in the first place.

"Hi," Wooyoung laughs. "What're you doing?"

"Just got out of my meeting with Soobin," Yeosang sighs. "Ever since I got promoted there's been a lot of pressure building on my shoulders, but I like it. It's nice. Feel like I have a purpose now."

"That new title is good for you then?"

"Yeah. Being labeled as a corporate hire was gross. But now, being a director of something feels nice. Has a better ring to it."

"As long as they treat you well, then I'm happy for you."

"They do, I promise. Soobin is the best boss, plus-" Yeosang's voice drops to a whisper suddenly. "I get to see him more often, and I can tell that he and Yeonjun have finally fucking gotten together."

"No way!" Wooyoung gasps, biting his lower lip as he smiles. "God, I'm happy for Yeonjun. He sounded so sad when I talked to him last."

"Yeah, I know! Soobin was going through a lot apparently, but they've smoothed it all over, I guess. I don't know how they manage a relationship and then go to work together where one is a fucking CEO and the other is the assistant, but what do I know? My boyfriend is literally a working idol, so I don't know."

"Lower your voice, you idiot! Don't get Soobin in trouble."

"Oh shit, you're right." Yeosang laughs. "Anyway, how're you?"

"I'm good. Had my session today, Sannie drove me home but now he's at his internship for an hour."

"I'm happy to hear that you're doing better."

"It's been a long road, but I'm finally here, y'know?"

"Yeah. Plus this little routine we've got going on has been really nice. I look forward to your phone calls when San leaves for class."

"I look forward to talking to you too," Wooyoung smiles. "Gives us a chance to talk about your work drama or the 'Yungi' bullshit."

"Oh my god, yeah. Don't remind me. They moved back in together, didn't they?"

"They did. Seonghwa said Yunho moved out recently and went back home."

"Thank. God."

"Now they just need to kiss and make up!" Wooyoung says, nearly hopeful that that alone would solve everything, even though he knew it wouldn't. "I've missed seeing Mingi at our friend nights."

"I know. At least they agreed to switch so we saw one of them every other week, but I guess this Friday will be different, won't it?"

"Way different. You and Jongho are still okay, right?"

"Yeah. I mean, it's been a rough few months since the beach house bullshit, but he's finally opened up about his feelings and he's being more thoughtful."

"So, did he admit it?"

"If you must know-" Yeosang sighs, but Wooyoung can tell that he's smiling. "Yeah. He loves me."

"But did you say it back?"

"Of course I did. He's a pain in the ass and he's a menace, but like. . . I don't know. There's no one else I want to come home to or go to sleep with, y'know? As much as we bicker and whatever, I can tell that he's actively trying to be better. It's taken a lot of communicating to get to this point, but after we tore down our relationship to pick apart the issues, we started rebuilding everything. So everything is a lot better. I'm more open and he's talking to me a lot more, so it's been nice."

"That's so good. I'm happy he finally pulled his head outta his ass."

Yeosang scoffs. "Me too. Hearing him break down his emotions and finally tear down his insecurities really got rid of my resentment and my anger towards him."

"I feel that way with Sannie." Wooyoung stares down into his lap, thinking back to the events of winter. "I broke his trust really badly and I've been doing everything that I can to rebuild it. I think we're almost there, but I don't know for sure. I've stopped making promises and just tried to stay committed to what I say to him, not to mention therapy and everything to work on myself, but-"

"I know he's proud of you, Woo." Yeosang says softly. "That's not something you have to worry about. You can see it in the way he looks at you. He's so incredibly fond of you, it's almost a little disgusting sometimes."

"Stop it." Wooyoung laughs.

"I'm being so serious. Seonghwa would agree with me!"

"Yeah, yeah. Okay." Wooyoung rolls his eyes. "Either way, I get what you mean about tearing everything down to rebuild it again. Sannie and I had to do that, and we didn't realize how many issues we had and were choosing to actively ignore."

"Love makes you blind."

"Well, I know that." Wooyoung sighs, leaning back into the couch. "I just wish I saw it sooner. Felt like I was going to lose him."

"But it didn't happen. Right? He's there. You have a brand new apartment together. You guys have this annoyingly cute routine and you're actively trying to get better, plus he's supporting you through it, isn't he?"

"Yeah. Of course he is."

"Then you've got nothing to worry about. We've all really come a long way since the beach house. Seonghwa got promoted to full time, now he and Hongjoong are looking for a new apartment because Seonghwa hates the old complex, I guess."

"He always has." Wooyoung scoffs.

"Yeah, so, they're taking a step together now. Jongho and I are doing just fine and on way better terms. You and Sannie are finally okay, and Mingi. . . he's trying and Yunho finally sees that."

"I'm glad that we're all here now."

"I know. If something would've happened, I don't know what we would've done as a group."

"In the words of my therapist-" Wooyoung takes a dramatic pause, only to accentuate his point. "Thinking of the what ifs will make you want to relive the past instead of focusing on the present."

"She's right."

"I know she is. She's been right about a lot of shit in my life."

"Well, that's kind of the point, isn't it?"

"I suppose." Wooyoung sighs. "I'm gonna go read my book, I think. I'll see you Friday?"

"Of course! I'll see you Friday. Talk to you later, Wooyo."

"Bye, Yeo." Wooyoung hums as the call disconnects, setting his phone down on his lap. He was content; happy, even. His life has changed drastically in the course of a few months, but he finally feels like he is on the path to recovering completely.

The hour alone passes uneventfully. Wooyoung read his book the entire time, only stopping once to grab something to eat from the fridge before returning to his nest on the couch, diving back into his dramatic novel. Before he realizes how much time has passed, keys unlock the front door and San steps inside, a smile curling on his lips when he spots Wooyoung.

"You look really invested in that book." San says, setting down his bag.

"It's so fucking good," Wooyoung glances up at San, putting his thumb in-between his open pages to keep his place. "How was the internship?"

"Boring, really." San sighs. "But, I dunno. I got paid to just sit and watch a class get taught."

"I mean," Wooyoung shrugs. "I'd take that. If you don't want to do it, I will gladly do it."

"I know you would." San approaches the couch, eyeing Wooyoung's novel still resting in his grasp. "Did you call Yeosang?"

"I did." Wooyoung's head tilts back as San leans down, a warm smile fading over his lips. "He and I talked for a while."

"Good." San kisses him, leaning away slightly. "I know he misses you a bunch."

"I miss him too. I miss everyone, actually. Oh! That reminds me," Wooyoung's brows pinch slightly. "Did you realize that this will be the first Friday that we have Yunho and Mingi back together at our group outing?"

"Oh, shit. No, I didn't." San's eyes widen slightly, searching Wooyoung's gaze as the male begins to talk excitedly.

"Right? I'm so excited. The dynamic between everyone is getting back to normal, and we're all going to have fun again. There's no more drama and no more bickering, no more wondering if 'Yungi' are going to survive this argument-"

San cuts him off by kissing him again. Wooyoung's words die immediately as he kisses San back without thought, feeling San's fingers gently press beneath his chin, tilting his head back further. After a moment lost between them, San parts away, smiling down at him. "Sorry. You were too cute just now, and I couldn't help myself."

Wooyoung's cheeks instantly flush, teeth sinking into his bottom lip, hands subconsciously moving to grab his bookmark from the back of his book, shoving it into his open pages. "I'm cute, huh?"

"Very." San hums. Wooyoung sets his book down on the couch next to him, reaching a free hand up to grab San by the collar of his shirt, pulling him back down to kiss him again.

"What was that for? Hm?" San asks when they part again, head tilting to the side slightly.

"Because I think you're cute." Wooyoung smiles at him, tugging on his shirt lightly. "Come sit. I wanna cuddle and make out on the couch and watch a movie."

"Okay, okay. Move over then." Wooyoung does as he's asked, sliding over a bit on the couch, being mindful to move his book out of the way as he does so. San plops down next to him, an arm outstretched, prepared for Wooyoung to melt into him readily.

"I'm happy you're home." Wooyoung says as he leans into San, sighing contently, turning his body so he's able to nose into San's neck just barely.

"I'm happy I'm home, too." San wraps his arm around him, smiling to himself.

"I love you." Wooyoung murmurs.

Without hesitance, San responds back quietly, holding Wooyoung closer. "I love you."

The day passes, leading into the following day that quickly tumbles into evening. Wooyoung had been alone for most of the day, watching Netflix and talking to his mother on the phone, and at some point, falling asleep on the couch while watching a horrible horror movie.

Now, he was in the bathroom fixing his hair meticulously, watching himself in the mirror as he brushes strands of hair behind his ears and pulls others in front, doing his best to make himself look decent. San was in the bedroom, likely getting dressed or waiting for him, especially since Wooyoung had spent the last ten minutes fixing his hair, clothes and the small amount of eyeshadow he had colored on the outer corner of his eyes. He knew he was overthinking every step of his routine, as he always did on Thursdays, but he wanted to look good for not only himself, but for his boyfriend too. It was their dedicated night to go somewhere and do something outside of the apartment, taking as much time as they want to dive deeper into their relationship.

Wooyoung was partially worried that they were spending too much time together, but he wouldn't change a single thing. Neither would San. Truthfully, San had looked forward to date nights more than Wooyoung had. Not to say that Wooyoung didn't like them, but there was a dormant worry lingering in the back of his mind that San would grow tired of their time spent together. He tried his best to ignore that thought, knowing that it stemmed from his anxiety and out of pure worry that his mistakes would continue to ruin him. But he was better than that, now. He knew he was getting better.

"Young'ah-" San calls from the bedroom, which was just on the other side of the closed bathroom door. "Are you done?"

Wooyoung sighs, pulling his hands away from his hair. "Yeah."

He turns on his heel after grabbing his phone, opening the bathroom door to eye San sitting down on the edge of their made bed, turning his gaze to look right back at Wooyoung. San smiles, and Wooyoung can just faintly see the tips of his ears grow red. Wooyoung had this feeling in his gut, a similar feeling that he's had many times before. Butterflies is the closest thing he could use to describe it, but it was stronger than that. He knows he's flushed, cheeks warm with redness as he looks at San, observing his outfit and jewelry with a heavy-lidded gaze.

San was wearing a dark navy button down, his usual go-to for Thursdays, sleeves rolled up halfway to his elbows, black jeans, a watch on his left wrist, a few rings across his fingers. Wooyoung could feel his heart constricting and contracting, struggling to remain calm in the presence of San looking so incredibly attractive. The feeling in his abdomen grows stronger, a sudden airiness to it now, almost as if he was seeing San for the first time again. Even if this was his childhood best friend, his claimed other-half, his boyfriend and his life partner; he felt as if he just fell in love with him all over again.

"Woo-" San starts, rising up from the edge of the bed. Wooyoung's heart melts, knowing that his intended plan had been executed perfectly. It was his goal every Thursday to make San speechless, at least, at first, pulling together an outfit that San would want to come home and rip off of him. Today would hopefully be no different.

He was wearing a white and black plaid shirt that was a size too big, sleeves long and bunched up with intentional rips, one side of the shirt hanging off of his left shoulder, exposing his skin just beneath. He matched the shirt with faded blue ripped jeans, hung loosely over his usual black boots, laced up and hidden beneath the hem of his long jeans. He had an array of necklaces and rings on, all of which were picked with meticulous intent. He wanted to go to dinner, talk with his boyfriend, flirt with him, and come home and rip that damn button-up right off of him.

Wooyoung steps closer, hands rising to fix the collar of San's shirt, blinking up to look at San. "I know. You too."

San smiles at him, hands settling on Wooyoung's waist. "Ready to go?"

"Mhm." Wooyoung tilts his head back slightly, smiling at him before kissing him delicately, doing his best to fight off the urge to bite San's lip and lick into his mouth.

"Let's go." San grabs Wooyoung's hand, tangling their grasp, leading him out of their bedroom and out of the apartment seconds later, locking their door behind them.

They walk out of the lobby and down the street, hands gently swinging between them as they walk past the park near their new apartment. The weather was comfortable, not too warm or too cold, which spurred the mutual decision in walking to their restaurant of choice. They talked about anything that came to mind that ranged from Yeosang's work drama to San's class schedule changing for the nth time this semester, but always somehow ending with Wooyoung giggling and San smiling at him.

Eventually, they reach their destination, walking into a quiet grill-type bar that was notorious for their fresh fish and array of meats. Wooyoung was settled at the table across from San, eyes looking down at the menu set ahead of him, gazing across his multitude of options. San looks at it too, seemingly stuck between three different choices, and Wooyoung quietly giggles at San's soft mumbles to himself.

They decide on a platter of beef and pork, deciding to grill it themselves at their table, while splitting a bowl of rice and lettuce to wrap their meat into. It was simple, nothing overly fancy, but Wooyoung was excited nonetheless.

"So Jongho loves Yeosang, huh?" San mentions, looking at Wooyoung fondly.

"Yeah," Wooyoung takes a drink of his soda before setting it aside, wetting his lips with his tongue absentmindedly. "He finally admitted it. Cat's outta the bag."

"I had a feeling he was hiding it." San watches Wooyoung smile.

"It's scary to admit. I get it. I understand exactly how he felt, but I don't get why he'd treat him the way he did."

"Well, he was explaining something about not being able to communicate, which made him upset with himself, and he inadvertently ended up pushing Yeosang away, which was how more than half of their arguments started." San leans back in his chair as he spots their server coming back with a tray full of their food. Wooyoung catches on, leaning back too.

"Okay, now when you say it like that, that makes sense." Wooyoung's brows pinch, but his expression softens when the server arrives and begins setting down their dishes, then pointing to the grill that was built into the table.

Wooyoung and San listen carefully as she explains how to turn it on and how to use it properly, setting down a pair of tongs and extra plates as she talks. Both males thank her before she leaves, and San immediately turns his attention to the grill, starting to poke around with the buttons until he manages to turn it on.

Wooyoung watches curiously, a smile growing on his lips as he watches San inspect the grill before grabbing the tongs to start cooking their meat.

"Besides that," San starts. "Talk about anything else?"

"No, not really." Wooyoung watches the meat as San places it down onto the grill carefully, listening to the quiet sizzle that rips through the space between them. "Yeosang was talking a bit about Soobin again, but otherwise, not much. Have you talked to Yunho lately?"

"Yeah, actually." San watches the grill closely, before glancing at Wooyoung as he starts talking. "I guess they've come to an agreement, of sorts."

"An agreement?" Wooyoung raises his brow.

"Yeah, as weird as it is, it's what works best for them. Mingi came clean a bit ago and said that he was afraid to admit to how their friendship was changing. I guess his worst fear is losing Yunho over something like this, and y'know. . . falling in love with your childhood best friend changes a whole lot. So, Mingi tried denying everything."

"Ah, that makes sense." Wooyoung's brows pinch. "But, I mean, he saw how the rest of us worked out, did he not?"

"I guess it wasn't enough to convince him. Mingi didn't want for them to get together and for it to not work out, which would leave their relationship in a weird place."

"I think we're all a little scared of that, though."

"Are you?"

Wooyoung meets San's gaze, looking away from the cooking meat. "I used to be. Not now. Seonghwa once said to me that we're basically the same, we just have sex and stuff now. Which I didn't agree with at the time, but he's kind of got a point."

"I see what he means. Out of the eight of us, you and I have always been really touchy with one another, so it makes sense."

"But Mingi has never shown interest in anyone besides random blondes he picks up at his job." Wooyoung mumbles, leaning back into his seat.

San scoffs, picking up a few pieces of cooked meat to set them down on Wooyoung's plate. "Even still, I think a part of him was doing it to see Yunho's reaction. I'm sure you've noticed that."

"Well, yeah." Wooyoung grabs his chopsticks, picking up a piece of beef between them. "I'm sure you've seen Yunho's longing, jealous stare then?"

"Haven't we all?" San muses, setting some beef down on his own plate before reaching to place more uncooked meats onto the grill.

"I kind of think we're just all happy to see them finally figuring it out." Wooyoung settles for, taking a hungry bite of his food. San glances at him, smiling, then looking away again. "What?"

"Nothing, I just-" San messes around with the beef on his plate, smiling still. "I'm happy right now, is all."

"Yeah," Wooyoung smiles at him, taking another bite, then swallowing after he chews. "Me too."

San looks up at him, almost relieved, and Wooyoung giggles at him. He knows he never admits to how he's feeling specifically unless San asks, but for the first time in a while, he truly honestly feels happy.

"Yeah?"

"Mhm." Wooyoung rests his elbow on the table, resting his head in his open palm, chopsticks resting in his fingers. "I'm here with you, why wouldn't I be?"

San's face flushes lightly, but his ears grow redder, and Wooyoung smiles. "I'm just. . . glad to hear you say it."

"You make me really happy, Sannie." Wooyoung knows the impact his words are having on San, because not only did he know that San loved being reassured, but he can see it. He loved making San a flustered mess, only because it was cute to make the elder fold into a sweet, babbling mess.

"I-" San's face grows redder. "You make me really happy, too."

Their meal ends after a near hour spent flirting and cooking meats, talking to one another about anything and everything that comes to mind. Wooyoung and San were in the midst of their journey home, hands tangled between them, laughing about something that had them collectively giggling like idiots when a sudden ringing interrupted their laughter, buzzing away in Wooyoung's back pocket. Wooyoung sighs, glancing at San apologetically, but San waves away his worry, leaving Wooyoung to answer the call.

"Hi, Hwa." Wooyoung hums, listening to Seonghwa quietly laugh on the other side of the call.

"Hi, Woo. How are you?"

"I'm good. I'm with Sannie right now, did you wanna say hi?"

"Yeah! Put me on speaker, actually. This call is for the both of you, ironically."

Wooyoung tilts his phone away, pressing the speaker button, holding his phone out in front of him with his volume loud enough for the both of them. "Okay, go ahead."

"Hi, Sannie!"

"Hi, Hwa." San smiles, glancing down at Wooyoung's phone.

"So listen, about tomorrow. I had an idea about where we could go, but only if you two want to."

"I'm listening." Wooyoung muses, encouraging Seonghwa to continue speaking.

"Let's go bowling."

"That's. . . not a bad idea." San glances at Wooyoung now, smiling at him, watching Wooyoung's eyes light up at the suggestion.

"That sounds fun." Wooyoung smiles, looking at his phone. "Seems like the perfect way to reintroduce the whole group, right?"

"I think so. It'll take the pressure off of forcing everyone to get along or something. It'll be fun and there's a nice bowling alley down the street from your new apartment. I think we should do it. Can't hurt, right?"

"I agree." Wooyoung glances at San. "What d'you think?"

"I think we should do it. Did you tell Joong yet, Hwa?"

"He's actually the one who mentioned it, believe it or not. He's been itching to do something other than going out to eat or going to a movie."

"Wow, look at Joong." San rolls his eyes, smiling when he hears Wooyoung laugh.

"I'm gonna pretend like I didn't hear the sarcasm in your tone." Seonghwa scoffs. "But anyway, do you wanna meet around seven?"

"Seven is fine for us. I'll be home way before then."

"Okay, sounds good to me. I'll let everyone else know. I'll see you both tomorrow!"

"Bye, Hwa!" Wooyoung hums, biting his lower lip as the call ends. "Bowling, huh? That'll be fun."

"I think it'll be a good change of pace. A little competitive spirit, watching each other fail and succeed-" San holds his hand tighter, turning to glance over at him. "It'll be good for everyone."

"I think so too."

With their shoes unlaced and kicked off, Wooyoung leads San back to their bedroom, hands still tangled between them. The lights were off in the apartment, save for the light over the sink in the kitchen, leaving the space in soothing quiet. Wooyoung had complete intentions of bringing San back to bed to rip his clothes off and kiss him as if he'd been starved, but the weight of the day is settling over his shoulders, and now he can't wait to climb into bed to sleep.

Wooyoung begrudgingly lets go of San's hand, heading towards their dresser, opening the second drawer to pull a pair of sweats out, then opening the third drawer after closing the second, grabbing a pair of San's joggers since he had a feeling he would want them. Wooyoung's hands move to his shirt, unbuttoning each small button through its hole, making his way up until the shirt opens completely. A rush of conditioned air cools over his exposed chest, sending a small shiver to run down his spine.

"Here," San murmurs, walking behind Wooyoung, a familiar black shirt held in his hand. Wooyoung smiles at him, grabbing for San's joggers, handing those over too.

"Thank you." Wooyoung smiles, feeling San take the joggers from his hand in an exchange, and placing the shirt in his now empty hand instead. San kisses the side of his head before disappearing into the en-suite, leaving the door ajar behind him. Wooyoung shrugs off his shirt, carefully folding it half-assed, laying it down on top of the dresser before tugging the black tee over his head and shoulders. He unzips his jeans, letting them fall down his legs before stepping out of them, tugging his sweats on instead, sighing in relief at how comfortable he had now felt.

San comes back out of the bathroom, raking a hand through his hair before shoving his clothes into their laundry tote, holding out a hand for Wooyoung's.

Wooyoung rolls his eyes, handing over his jeans and barely-folded shirt, watching as San smiles and places the clothes inside of the tote on top of his own.

After washing his face and tying his hair back properly, Wooyoung turns off the bathroom light, heading over to the bed and spotting San laying down on his side with his phone screen illuminating his features.

Wooyoung crawls into bed, tossing the covers back and moving his legs beneath, wrapping his arms around San. He buries his face into the back of San's neck, pressing a kiss to his skin before breathing him in. San hums contently, shutting his phone off.

"Who're you texting?" Wooyoung asks out of curiosity, gently shoving a leg between San's.

"Yunho." San says sleepily. "He's asking about the bowling alley."

"Mm." Wooyoung sighs.

"Jagi?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you have a good day?"

"I did." Wooyoung holds him a little tighter, wanting nothing more than to melt into his skin. "Did you?"

"I did, too." San wraps a hand around Wooyoung's, taking a deep breath.

After a moment, Wooyoung leans away from San's neck, head resting into their shared pillow. "Sannie?"

"Hm?"

"Do you, uhm-" Wooyoung bites his tongue, somehow finding it hard to ask a question that has been lingering in the back of his mind for the last few weeks. "Do you still not. . . trust me?"

His voice is small as he speaks, worried and completely unsure of what to expect. He was doing everything he could to rebuild everything he had so thoughtlessly broken, including San's trust for him. He knew it might've been out of line to ask, but he wanted to know if he could do more to fix their relationship.

They had felt like they were on smoother grounds, repairing most of their internal wounds from one another, and somewhere in all of that, Wooyoung hoped that San's trust had been somewhat healed too. It was wishful thinking, sure, but Wooyoung wanted to hope rather than let himself believe that San would never trust him again.

"I do." San says softly. "I do trust you, jagi."

Wooyoung sits up just barely, eyes slightly widened. "Really?"

San turns around enough to face him, eyes tired, his smile warm and sleepy. "Of course I do. It took awhile, but I'm there, Woo. I trust you."

Wooyoung's eyes water just enough for a single tear to slip past, allowing a flood of relief to soak his core. Wooyoung feels like he can breathe with new lungs, no longer wounded from an aching hole in his heart that had grown from the realization of how badly he had hurt San.

San reaches up and wipes the tear away, slightly frowning. "Don't cry. It's okay. I do trust you. I really do."

"Okay." Wooyoung takes a breath, hand reaching up to cup San's. "I really love you."

"I love you more." San smiles at him as Wooyoung leans down and kisses him twice, only pulling away to murmur two words against San's lips.

"Thank you." Wooyoung kisses him again, hand reaching to gently touch his jaw, thumb smoothing over his cheekbone.

Three long months spent repairing himself and his relationship had finally been won over. A long uphill battle with many arguments and hardships along the way, but it wasn't enough to deter Wooyoung from fighting for his future. He was finally sleeping, taking care of himself, talking through his problems and reading more, while also expressing his love for San more actively and checking in on his friends more often.

He truly was at his lowest, falling into a pit of hell while being unable to breathe. But San dragged him out, as he always had. Wooyoung was still here and was still fighting, nearing his end goal of just being happy.

There was still some healing left to do, but with San, Wooyoung felt like he was close to finally forgiving himself.