Josh x suicidal reader

You lay on the cold bathroom floor,

Josh was out doing a mission, and it was late at night

He was gone all day leaving you alone in your lonesome thoughts

Josh knew you had trouble with depression but never knew how far you'd take it

You sit up, feeling weak and almost emotionless

You got up, sniffing and you went to your hiding spot and got your razors

You felt empty, useless, Josh would be better off without you

You started the bathtub, filling it up with cold water

You watched it fill with emotionless eyes,

As it was all full you sat down in the water fully clothed, as you felt the cold water soak your clothes

You felt tears prick your eyes, as you started to cry

Your rolled up the sleeves to your hoodie, and held the razor to your arm, and cut

And cut

And cut

That was until it was your Final Cut, the last one, your wrist

Your thoughts only push your father down, as the words Josh spoke about loving you, you felt were lies now

You held the razor blade to your wrists, when you heard the bathroom door handle twist

You panic, you didn't even hear Josh come in from your deep loud thoughts

"Y/n, dear are you okay" he says as the door slowly opens and you panic

Josh looks in seeing your state, and it looks like his heart broke....

"Y/N, W-What! Dear what are you doing" he shouts and runs in

He rushes to your side, fear and concern in his eyes

"Y/n baby why would you do this" he says fear clear in his eyes

You just start sobbing, it's all you can think to do

He instantly just bends over the tub and grabs you, and wraps his arms around you,

"Shhh, I'm here now baby, I'll help you" he whispers rubbing your back as your head rests on his shoulder

You whimper and look at him, he grabs your arms gently,

"Come on dear, let's get you out and bandage your cuts, then I'll get you some dry clothes" he says

He pulls you out of the bathtub, as you drip water on the ground from your wet clothes

He grabs something from the cabinet and then sits on ground pulling you in his lap

He kisses your cheek then starts to clean the cuts on your arms patching them up

You sniffle and whine a bit, as he cleans you cuts

He bandages them and then stands up, not caring if you soaked his clothes

"Now come on, let's get you all dry" he says and takes you by the hand,

You didn't move and he looked down at how tired and exhausted you were

He picked you up and carried you out the bathroom and to his room setting you on the end of his bed

He digs around in his closet, as you watch him searching for clothes, tears fill your eyes as it's hard to believe he loves you so much

He walks back over to you holding a oversized hoodie and checkered pj pants, he then sees the tears in your eyes and somewhat panics

"Baby, what's wrong" he says and pulls you close as you sniffle

"I don't see why you love someone like me" You whimper and he pats your head,

"Well, it's because I love you for you, no matter how sad or insecure you are it won't stop me from comforting you and reminding you everyday how much I love you" He says and you nod looking up at him as he smiles and wipes the tears from your eyes

"Now may I help you change you clothes" He asks and you nod

He gently pulls off your soaked sweatshirt making sure to careful of you bandages

He pulls your pants down and then turns around as you got curious

"Y-you can take off the rest, I won't look promise" He says, he was so sweet

You wiped you eyes, and then took the rest of your clothing off,

Putting the hoodie on and then the pants,

"Joshy" you whimper and he turns around and smiles and then hugs you tightly

"Now I'm gonna get my pjs on and we'll watch movies" He says kissing your head and then going to his closet

He comes back in a white shirt and sweats, you reach your arms out feeling exhausted and really down

"Aw" he simply says and picks you off the end of the bed and set you near his pillows and then gets in with you, cuddling you

"I love you, Y/n I promise, I couldn't live if you weren't with me dear" He says and you nod

"I love you too" you whisper as he rubs your back and you fall fast asleep

Josh was sure to hide any blades, and make sure to take very good care of you, he did love you, he made a promise~