CRUEL SUMMER
22, BONFIRE

" AND WHAT ARE WE THINKING?" Renee hums, exiting from the closet. Patting down the creases in the baby blue coloured lace dress she put on, doing a twirl for Jaylee who sits on the edge of her bed.

its a soft clapping of her hands that breaks a smile onto Renee's lips — it's strange, getting ready without the boys.

The sound of their 'ews' when Pope and John B would walk in on Renee in her bra and the way JJ would linger in the doorway and offer his assistance before being pulled away.

No arguments of Renee asking John B if he can crop one of his tops in the name of fashion. No shotgunning of beers on the porch as the soft hum of Bob Marley fills the space. Its strange, stepping back from what has been Renee's normal for the last couple years, but then again it's the only normal JJ knows.

He was a pogue first, he knew them all first. And depending on how this break up would go, Renee might even have to revert back for her old life, or float in the middle of it all for the next year until she leaves for college.

" you look hot." Jaylee hums " you're going to have the boys swarming."

And Renee tries to smile, when in truth the only boy she wants is the one who isn't interested anymore.

The sound of the doorbell brings Renee back as she looks at Jaylee, " that'll be Sarah, I'll be back." picking up her pace as she moved down stairs and towards the front door.

The door opens revealing Sarah, looking small in the doorway as she stands like a statue. " hey, come in, jays upstairs." Renee momentarily wraps her arm around her friend.

Taking a step back and then furrowing her eyebrows when Sarah doesn't come inside,

"Sar?" she hums, looking how she flickers her gaze behind her which Renee doesn't follow.

" look if you're not up to it we don't have to go, order in pizza-" Renee begins before Sarah shakes her head.

" it's not that." She hums and looks behind her again as Renee follows her eyeline this time. Revealing Topper and Fletcher stood outside his car that is parked on Renee's driveway.

Her mouth makes a small 'o' shape, as the brunette notices her and lifts his hand into a wave. which Renee acknowledges with her small smile as she pulls her head back in and shoots Sarah a wide eyed look.

" Sarah, what's going on?" she says with a wide smile that lacks authenticity as Sarah exhales.

" I broke up with John B." she mumbles, Renee having to ask her to repeat herself because she thought she imagined it the first time.

" and when you invited me to the bonfire, topper mentioned he was going..." she tells the blonde,

Renee nods her head " so you told him that he and the boy that JJ is convinced is in love with me could come with us?" she asks as Sarah nods meekly.

" but you can't get mad at me." Sarah tells her, as Renee furrows her brows as she looks at her friend.

" and why exactly is that?" she asks as Sarah notions to the boys as she walks into the house.

" a little something called the dead dad pass." she hums as she walks past, Renee pushing her head back slightly. Blowing a breath out, already dictating that this night is going to end badly.

MAYBE THEY WONT EVEN BE THERE, is the thought that goes through Renee's mind when they eventually leave the house and get in Topper's car to drive to the bonfire.

Toying anxiously with her bracelets as she tries her hardest to ignore the boy who sits beside her, their legs pushed up against one another as they sit in the back of the car. The boy who she hasn't spoken to since he tried to kiss her, the boy who doesn't know that her boyfriend aka his only obstacle had broken up with her.

Instead of facing her problems, Renee had resulted to giving Jaylee a full debrief of all the bonfire parties that she had attended since the age of fourteen. The drama between people Jaylee didn't know and instead just politely nodded.

The car parked up, Renee politely looking at Fletcher as their hands collided when reaching to unbuckle their belts. He smiled whilst she adverted her gaze and hurried in Jaylee's direction out of the door.

And when they began to walk, she felt Fletcher grab her hand. Reeling her back and towards the car, their absence soon noted as Topper looked at them both.

" you guys coming?" topper asked, looking at Renee and Fletcher who were still lingering by the car.

" yeah, we'll just be a second!" Fletcher called out, Renee gave Sarah a small nod that she was fine before the other three headed towards the sound of the noise.

And once they were far enough, Renee's arms folded as she looked at Fletcher " what do you want?" she hummed.

He scoffed " I want to know why you've been ignoring me Ren? I thought we were friends."

She nodded " we were, until you tried to kiss me." she told him, a slight sternness in her voice as Fletcher rolls his eyes.

" and If you haven't forgotten, my best friend was in prison." Renee continues " my plate has been pretty full."

She notices the soften in Fletchers face, as he nods his head " yes totally, how are you doing?"

Shit, she thinks.
" fine," she says instead " I'm fine fletch."

He nods his head, giving her a short smile before beginning to follow the others footsteps.

" and I'm sorry about you and JJ." he says, beginning to walk away as Renee remains, her feet planted by the car " what?"

Fletcher licked back a small smile before turning back around " you two breaking up, I just figured after what I saw today-" he began, quickly cut off by the blonde who stepped closer.

" after you saw what today?" she questioned, trying not to sound as panicked as she felt,

Fletcher shrugged his shoulders, " him and that girl." Four syllables which had managed to create this ache in Renee's chest as she shook her head, trying not to look as affected by Fletchers words as she obviously was.

" what girl?"

Fletcher tilted his head slightly " you know- Red head, works at the gas station in the middle of town."

Renee nods, remembering her. Not Important enough to know her name — but she recalled times she went in there before her and JJ were even anything, she let them buy alcohol because it was obvious she had a crush on JJ.

The girl that Renee once walked in on in John B's room, the same girl who shot Renee a sick smile when she left the bedroom and noticed the blonde on the porch outside.

What was he doing with her? Talking? flirting? fully on making out on the counter ?

The thought of any of them made Renee sick to the stomach, as she just nodded pushing the feeling down as she looked at Fletcher

"well it doesn't matter, we broke up so he can do whatever he wants." she hums, beginning to walk towards the party, " come on, I need a drink!"

The two enter the party, it's already in full swing by the time that they show up. Moving over to the group as Sarah passes her a tin of something, Renee doesn't really care what it is as the taste of alcohol runs bitterly down her throat.

Her eyes gaze, the first thing they notice being the Twinkie that is parked up on the outskirts. And her eyes scan for her friends, then falling back to her group when she can't find anyone.

But he found her. JJ's eyes wandered, before noticing her. Blonde hair curled at the ends, half up half down. a lilac mini dress that cut off at her mid thigh, keeping herself warm with this denim jacket he recognised to be Lennon's. A bag that had a logo he knew was expensive hanging off of her arm . He felt John B's hand press against his shoulder, forcing his eyes away from the blonde girl and back to his friend.

" shit, is that ren?" he asked to which JJ gave a small nod, " damn, she looks-"

" like a kook." JJ told him, he couldn't hide the hurt in his voice — a girl who looked foreign to him, nothing like the girl he loves.

" do you think that's why she's not been over today?" he asks as JJ who shrugs his shoulder, only looking at her for a few seconds longer — noticing Fletcher who appears and hands Renee a red solo cup.

Her smile is bright as they clink cups and she begins to drink, Fletcher taking a sip and being the one to notice JJ as the rim of his cup hides his smile.

" why you asking me? She's obviously not my girl anymore." JJ huffs, walking away. Renee's eyes following him when they find him in the crowd, before looking back to John B as he shrugs his shoulders at his friend.

" POPE! KIE!" the two teenagers turn around, noticing the blonde tumbling towards them. Yet another red cup pried in her hands as she pulls the two of them into a hug,

" it has been forever." she tells them, her smile big and toothy as the other two look at one another.

" Ren, how much have you had to drink?" Kie hums, taking the cup and smelling it — turning away to cough at the scent of whatever she has been drinking all night.

Pope looks at his friend as she takes the cup back from Kiara " not enough." She huffs, taking another sip as the blonde looks at Pope.

" P, you love me right?" she asks, the boy furrowing his brows " yes?"

She shakes her first " I don't like the hesitation, but- you wouldn't lie to me would you?"

Pope flickers a gaze to Kiara who just widens her eyes, too unsure what the blonde is leading up to.

" no, of course not." he says, still slightly unsure.

she nods, " good good, that's good."
Taking a breath as she points a finger at him

" do you think the girl at the gas station is pretty?" pope furrows his brows at Renee's question.

Infuriated by his clear confusion, she continues " oh you know! the red-head, always gives us liquor...do you think she's pretty?"

Pope gurgles on an answer, opening his mouth yet nothing comes out except " yeah...she's pretty I guess."

Renee nods her head, laughing as she lifts her cup again " hm, JJ seems to think so too."

Pope and Kiara look at each other, a look of recognition for one another about what was really happening here.

" Ren," Kiara says, reaching to place a hand on her friend's arm before she shakes her head " no, no I'm fine." She scoffs.

" I hope they live happily every fucking after." she lifts her glass " with their beautiful children with JJ's eyes and her red hair." she takes another heavy sip.

She shakes her head " damn, they'd be beautiful children." taking another chug as she looks at the pitiful looks that her friends are giving her.

a fake laugh fills the air from her mouth as she turns around, ignoring the calls from her friends to come back as Renee moves to the corner.

Most people joined in the middle as they dance, Renee watches them — the couples who laugh and talk as their bodies sway to the music. Jealously seeps into her stomach as her top row of teeth begin to tether into her bottom lip.

" so, are you and your new boyfriend enjoying the party?" JJ asked Renee, stumbling over to where she stood taking in some air by herself — turning her head she looked at him and shook her head.

" go away JJ." she told him, furrowing her eyebrows as his eyes examined her face.

" if you came to just rub your new found singularity to me, you're wasting your time." she said, " I'm pretty sure there are many girls you'd rather be flirting with, like the gas station girl."

It was clear jealously from what she had heard Fletcher had witnessed a few hours ago was getting to her — JJ felt a slight hint of guilt although it was covered by the slick smirk that sat on his lips.

" oh, don't be jealous." his hand reaching out, finger curling over her arm only momentarily— before Renee shrugged it off.

" full of yourself much! I'm not jealous!" she scoffed at the idea of it, although undeniably she was, " and your breath stinks of beer, If anything I feel nauseous."

She turned her head, as JJ exhaled and took another swig of his drink " I don't like her."

Renee kept her eyes away " and I don't care." she hummed, except she so clearly did.

And JJ could tell that, as he leant in slightly. His lips brushing her ear gently " can I tell you a secret Ren?"

Her head turned, slightly staggered by the lack of distance between them. Having no cocky comment or rebuttal as her eyes softened and she just nodded her head.

JJ felt his lips curve into a smile, " I thought flirting with someone else would make me feel better," he hums, Renee nodding gently beginning to stir her gaze away again.

" but it didn't." he shook his head, " If anything, I just missed you more."

Her looked at him, that stupid glow in his face and glint in his eyes — that stupid face that she loved. But in the same face she found the person who had hurt her, the pillowy lips that when parted spoke words that broke her heart. The soft eyes that when they get mad make her own tear up.

Renee looks away, bringing her cup up to her lips as she takes a large sip.

" what can I do?" JJ asks Renee shook her head letting a sigh slip from her lips.

"nothing, we've established that I'm not the same person I was." she tells him, " and if you don't love her, that's fine."

His fingers reached out to grab her wrist, although Renee felt the butterflies in her stomach begin to flutter.

" please,just talk to me ." he asked, Renee shook her head, " tell me what the hells going on so we can fix it."

" for what, the night? Wait till you wake up and there's no alcohol in your system and you realise you don't want to be with me anymore?" she rose her voice slightly, alerting Fletcher who stood with some other kooks nearby.

He excused himself and JJ scoffed as the brunette wondered over, looking skeptically at the situation unfolding between them,

" is everything alright over here?" Renee nodded at the boy who was trying to read the expressions on her face,

" everything's fine-" JJ began to tell him, slightly aggravated by the mere sight of the boy. Even more so, how closely he stood by Renee.

Fletcher looked at JJ soon silencing him by raising his index finger at him, " I wasn't asking you."

" Fletcher, I'm fine we were just talking." Renee coughed, looking at JJ who nodded and squinted her eyes at the two of them — jealously coarsening through his body at the closeness between the two of them.

" Ren, tell your lap dog to leave us." all eyes soon landed on JJ as he took another swig of his drink.

" JJ!" she snapped,

Fletcher chuckled, " don't worry Ren." his hand sitting on the middle of her back " this drunken idiotdoesn't intimidate me." He laughs,

JJ taking note of the hand placement of Fletcher as he scoffs — moving to stand over the boy.

" what kooks can't get their own girlfriends so they have to come back from what New York was it? And break up happy couples?"

" pretty desperate fletch." He licks back a smirk, only angering the kook more.

Fletchers hands pushed against JJ's chest — the red cup of beer spilling all down Renee's dress as she could feel the eyes of the crowd linger around them.

" you have no idea about mine and Renee's relationship jackass!" he spat " you should've known this wouldn't of lasted, she's too good for a lowlife drunk like you."

That in itself was a bad idea, JJ throwing the empty  cup as the contents were now all over Renee to the floor. The girl who didn't have any physical strength to even contemplate breaking this up, instead look hopelessly at the pace that John B and Pope made their way over.

" what relationship Fletcher? She doesn't fucking love you anymore, she didn't in the first place!"

Fletcher shook his head, " she did! Before I went to New York!" He calls out, JJ only letting out a laugh and letting his mouth spread into a thicker smirk.

His finger prodding the brunettes chest, " yeah well, whose name has she been moaning since then?"  he asks, before beginning to silently mouth his name in Fletcher's direction.

Pope pulling back JJ whilst John B stood in between them, noticing the slight lunge Fletcher took in JJ's direction.

Renee folding her arms as she looks at the blonde, her eyes slightly teary as she shakes her head. Beginning to move through the small crowd that had gathered around the two of them.

And how JJ watched as Fletcher followed her, without the constraints of his best friends to hold him back. Because in eventuality, he was the better guy.

He didn't get drunk and start arguments with his exes ex. And because of that, he got to follow her. He got to be the one to wipe the stained beer off of her dress and they'd laugh about it and then he'd offer to drive her home. And maybe she'd even kiss him in the front seat of his car tonight.

The thought alone made JJ sick, fighting Pope's grip as he straightened the collar of his shirt "dude, I'm fine." he assures.

" yeah really?" pope scoffs, as he turns away — unlike JJ who watches them. They stand there still, Fletcher returning with a handful of napkins as he begins to pass them to Renee.

The way she smiles at him, and the way he looks at her. She doesn't realise, of course she doesn't. Because JJ has watched so many people watch her in this awe that she is oblivious to.

" god you stink of beer." Fletcher tells the blonde who shakes her head with a small laugh.

" shut up." she tells him, continuing to blot the dark stains on her dress. Only looking up to him when he hasn't said anything in a few seconds.

His eyes suddenly staring at her and his face serious. Renee's brows furrow as she stops pushing the paper on the material of her dress,

" what is it?" she asks, noticing his silence as Fletcher begins to close the space between the two of them.

" I wouldn't have treated you like that." he tells her, a faint yet nervous smile on Renee's lips —

" Fletch-" she said as a small exhale of hot breath left her mouth until their lips collided, it was quite quick. Not enough time for the girl to really even think about it.

Her hands sliding up to rest on his shoulders as she tried to picture anyone else but JJ in this moment — and how different Fletcher was to JJ, kombucha covered his tongue opposed to the beer on JJ's.

She tried to imagine JJ's untamed blonde locks I instead of the short brown strands that her fingers struggled to get lost in. She tried to remember how much she liked kissing Fletcher before she ever began kissing JJ.

' god stop thinking about him.' she thought, trying to move her lips in a different sync than she had grown use to.

" JJ, no!" Pope says, noticing the look that grows on the blonde's face the longer that he forces himself to watch it, " you guys are broken up."

All voice of reasoning seemingly out the window as a mist of anger and jealously deepens in JJ's mind, his hand balling up— crushing the red cup he was drinking out of in the process. Beer spilling down his arm, as he pushes the hand Pope put on his chest off.

Pope's calls for his friend useless as JJ paced over to the pair, a shout came out in the form of

" get the hell off of her!"

JJ's arm swinging into Fletcher's face, more or less forcing the two teenagers away from each other — Renee caught in the aftermath as she stumbled back, still slightly discombobulated until she collided with the floor of a separate level of the rocky area.

Her body ached, as she groaned — noticing Topper make his way over to Fletcher's aid, John B and Pope to force JJ away and Sarah and Kiara soon enough swarming to help the blonde up from the floor.

" shit, Ren are you ok?" Sarah advocated her concern, bending beside the girl as she felt her eyes water from the pain that coarsed through her body. Kiara helping her up. She wiped the dirt off of her body.

Looking up to the full on kook versus pogue fist fight which had began. The blonde shook her head and felt her stomach turn with a slight rage

" no, no I am not fucking ok!" she raised her voice, beginning to walk towards the fight. Forcing through the crowds of teenagers who had gathered to watch the fist fight. Forcing herself into the no-man's land as she reached for the flannel material of JJ's shirt.

His face tight, jaw clenched as he spun around — his gaze softening when he notice the blonde.

" Ren." he said, not having much time to say anything else as the girl began to pull him away.

JJ relished the fact that she was holding him, regardless of the conditions it was under. Only fazing back into the situation when his back collided with the closed door of the twinkie

He looked at her, " Ren," he attempted to speak as she shook her head, shutting him down immediately.

"No!" her voice a shout, forceful as she cornered JJ away from the rest of the party

" I don't want to fucking hear it!" She continued, pulling him away, hiding them by the Twinkie.

JJ pushing himself against the side of the van as Renee began to pace in a small width in front of him.

He opened his mouth " Ren come on-"

her finger pointed at the blonde boy, " no JJ!" she shouted  " you broke up with me, you broke up with me." The second time slightly more spaced out to clarify to him and his drunken state.

The rest of the party looked at the two exes whom now looked with eachother in loathing instead of once love — they couldn't hear them but the sight of them arguing was enough.

" JJ, you decided that you didn't want to be with me anymore-" she began,

" no I said as long as he was in your life." Although still looking at Renee as he pointed to Fletcher as he furrowed his eyebrows.

" Look! I don't care what terms it was on!" Her voice silencing him again " You broke up with me so you have zero right to come here and start a fight because you're jealous!" She told him

" If it were my choice, we'd be here together, we'd still be together, I would have been there kissing you."

JJ could see the tears filling her eyes the more she spoke " but we broke up , so you don't not get to come here, and act like you still care like you still care about me or my heart,"

He watched in a slight hopelessness as her tears began to dribble down her cheeks " not when you're the one who fucking broke it! "

JJ hated this. The tears, the frown accompanied by quivering lips . The fact she was upset, and the fact that he was reason that she was upset. His arm reached out and took her hand.

Renee knew she needed to pull it back, it hurt too much being so close with him, holding him again.

But she hesitated, she still loved him — no part of her ever stopped. She missed his touch, so much so she felt relieved she still felt it again.

And he was angry. With her, with Fletcher and with he whole situation that forced them apart. He hated how blind she was, how she only saw the good in the boy who obviously had other intentions that either she couldn't see or didn't want to.

But of course he still loved her, a love that all consuming doesn't leave with a few heated exchanges and the breaking of a promise.

He pulled her in, slowly at first. She hesitated to be swayed but she did. Eyes fluttering shut the closer she got to him, wincing slightly at the cold brush of his fingers on her wet cheek.

" I love you." he exhales, as Renee sniffs as she opens her eyes, looking at him.

"please JJ-" she breathes out, this is their rock bottom — as low as they can go without being torn apart. But even that doesn't seem that far anymore.

And they stand there, looking at each other. Wondering where they went wrong and if they'll ever be able to build it back up again.

" I'm sorry." he says as she nods her head and offers a small smile " I know."

The silence lingers a little longer. Before the sound of hurried footsteps tear them apart, pulling away their hands as Renee steps back.

" do you need a ride home?" JJ asks, Renee turning her head and looking at the small group that are already looking at her.

Turning back to face her friends as she shakes her head " no, I'm good thanks." Her arms folded " but I better get going ."

They all just nod their heads, " stay out of trouble ok?" she says, beginning to walk away as she shoots them a small smile.

Kiara exhales, watching the same sight as JJ "why does it feel like we've lost her?" she hums as JJ nods his head with a sad sullen smile curving into the sides of his mouth.

" yeah, worst feeling ever isn't it?" he hums, climbing into the van.

AUTHORS NOTE.

ugh I just love them so much, even when they're in their broken up era

also I may switch this book into first person perspective... thoughts?

vote & comment x